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2015

19

May

Carmen Electra’s See Through Old Lady Strip of the Day

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Carmen Electra is 100 years old…and was used at some AIDS event in Vienna that is apparently the most important AIDS event in the world…as some stripper in see through hosiery…that may or may not be showcasing her nipples…in what may or may not be a feature called “The Amazing She Doesn’t Have Aids Based on her Bottom Feeding Career Filled With Unproducted Hooker-Like Sex with Rich and Famous Dudes”….I hear it was her or Magic Johnson doing Jump Shots to show the world that AIDS or Not…if you’re rich enough you can power through it..

Speaking of AIDs, some people are pretty sensitive about AIDS…but most young people under 25 don’t even know AIDS exist and still think it’s a retro thing that doesn’t matter…meaning no condoms, which is ok, if these idiot kids werent having sex with every single random person they meet on the internet…including but not limited to people like you…and me…

So my prediction is a huge AIDS comeback tour…like it was the Spice Girls…or Carmen Electra still showing tits in her 40s….for AIDS…weird…

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Posted in:Carmen Electra

2015

19

May

Willa Holland Laying In Bed of the DAy

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Willa Holland was the sister on the OC, people wanted to fuck her harder than she was Micha Barton….Now she’s on some Canadian produced shitty TV show that I am sure a bunch of Virgin Losers watch – like you since you are a virgin loser and since it is based on some kind of nerd comic…..

She exists in the entertainment world for the same reason most people exist in the entertainment world…raw talent…and by raw talent I mean her stepfather was Brian De Palma…who you may know as the director of Scarface…and who probably has a huge list of “friends”..in the industry…who could appreciate her raw talent…

I guess lucky for her, she wasn’t one of the teens that the industry passed around as a sex object, because apparently, the child sex rate is higher in producer offices than any school principal, janitor or bus driver’s office combined..

Not that any of that matters, I mean everything in life is based on who you know, and if I was a stepfather with any access, I’d get you the easy money too…because easy money just makes sense when your life objective is hookers and booze..and easy money just makes sense because working fucking sucks…..

Posted in:Willa Holland

2015

19

May

Nicki Minaj and Beyonce have a Video of the Day

Beyonce and Nicki Minaj are releasing a song for Tidal, which is Jay Z’s failed app that everyone was talking about last week, and I guess it would only make sense that he do what he knows best and that’s get star studded people to endorse it…especially when one is his wife and business partner and the other is Nicki Minaj, a puppet trying so hard to find authenticity in the hip hop world…even though we know, like Drake, behind that “hood” accent and speech is an educated person who knows how to speak normally, you know like a modern day Ali G…with big tits and a fake ass…

All this to say…they are eating burgers in the video and that’s enough excitement for one day…
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Posted in:Beyonce

2015

19

May

Laís Ribeiro for Elle Italia of the Day

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Laís Ribeiro is one of the new Victoria’s Secret models they’ve abducted from some Brazilian village…who they have living in some model house where they show her pictures of her family and threaten to kill them off if she doesn’t smile for the camera like a dancing monkey who owes her career to them…

She’s 24…she’s the new Adriana Lima…she may not actually be human, as Victoria’s Secret does have enough money to create life-like AI, but we’ll just assume she’s real…since you’ve had sex with enough inanimate objects in your life, including girls you’ve jacked up with roofies, so I’ll let you have this one…

Posted in:Lais Ribeiro

2015

19

May

Rosie Hungtington-Whiteley for VS of the Day

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Rosie Hungtington-Whiteley’s face looks a little rugged in this VS shoot, which is too bad, because I am a Rosie Hungtinton-Whiteley fan….and firm believer that she was at one point one of the hottest, cunty, models, who would get naked in photoshoots, would act in movies better than girls who claim to be models, all while being some uppity British chick….who dates rich bald fit men making other bald men hopeful that if they get rich and famous they too will get a Rosie Huntington-Whitely…but they won’t….

The theme of the shoot is “Movie Star”….unfortunately not “70s Skin Movie Star”…but I guess I can’t direct all shoots, in fact I can’t direct any shoots because no one cares about my worthless opinion…

Posted in:Rosie Hungtington-Whiteley

2015

19

May

Hailey Baldwin Titty Dance of the Day

Hailey Baldwin is Stephen Baldwin, who played Barney Rubble in the Flintstones and not much else’s daughter…with what I can only assume was a Brazilian model, and she’s gone onto amazing socialite type things only rich La/NY girls can do, like hang with Taylor Swift and the Jenners….and more importantly bang Justin Beiber..when she was 17…all while pretending to be a model, because it’s easy to become a model, when you’re a Baldwin, unless you’re Ireland Baldwin, in which case no one wants you….but lucky for Hailey…she’s not Ireland…and here she is shaking them tits….tits that Bieber has desecrated…

Posted in:Hailey Baldwin

2015

19

May

Queen Latifah Tits for Bessie of the Day

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I was once in an elevator with Queen Latifah, who is probably the most rugged, gangster acting bitch, with an entourage of seriously hardcore dykes, who you know she puts up inside her vagina to recreate child birth, it’s a fetish…and she was actually really friendly to me and if anything I was the one weirded out because I thought I walked in on some deep south lesbian gang meeting…

Well, it turns out that she’s got tits that I’d expect her to have, being overweight and older, and the reality is that these are the kinds of tits that got me through the 70s thanks to national geographic, and the kind of tits that could feed a village, that still excite me because they are floppy, real, and borderline disgusting…at least if you were to see them on an 18 year old instagram model the second the Victoria’s Secret bra gets pulled off…but on a middle aged black woman…they are heavenly…

Posted in:NSFW|Queen Latifah

2015

19

May

Scientologist in a Bathing Suit of the Day

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Her name is Alanna Masterson and she’s a Scientologist…a Scientologist in a bathing suit…which is really the best way to view Scientologists…I mean that and in their steam rooms…where they are cleansing their bodies from drugs thanks to the words of wisdom of a drug store, pulp, sci/fi writer who was broke and figured “why don’t I make my smut into a religion”…and found a solid following that turned it into the billion dollar cult…something I one day aspire to achieve with this site, because if you can turn smutty nonsense into a billion dollars, I an provide the smutty nonsense…

Join me…in this journey of spiritual enlightenment by staring at a smoking Masterson…who is fatherless thanks to Scientology forcing you to disconnect by people who leave the church…meaning she’s got the level of daddy issues I want grinding against my leg while listening to love songs…

Posted in:Alanna Masterson

2015

19

May

Eddie Petterson for Purienne of the Day

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According the my extensive journalistic research, this is Eddie Petterson’s ass by Purienne, who I still think is one of the better “naked for fashion” creeper photographers who walks the line of softcore porn and fashion porn all thanks to shooting models and not hooker porn chicks…

She’s Gluten Free, Sugar Free, Vegan…according to her instagram she’s not that famous…but she’s a food blogger, perpetuating healthy eating, because the world eats like shit, and because of that, don’t have asses like this, but should have asses like this, so follow her fucking program, and start by taking some before ass pics and sending them to me, because I like looking at pics of asses…

Posted in:Eddie Petterson|NSFW

2015

19

May

Kate Beckinsale Getting Spanked of the Day

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I don’t know if the dude slapping Kate Beckinsale’s ass is her boyfriend, hired help, door man, or just some random dude walking behind her that looks like he’s slapping her ass, but that’s probably because the only thing I know about Kate Beckinsale is that she’s got some 17 or 18 year old daughter…despite looking young and hot and more importantly like someone that nerds everywhere are obsessed with and have been obsessed with the last decade thanks to being in one nerd movie, because apparently that’s all it takes..

So if you want a sustainable career and fan base, have you kid with a rich guy when you’re 18, so that you get an allowance for the rest of your life, allowing you to focus on having sex with producers who make nerd movies, securing a fan base for the rest of your life, and all you really need to ensure is that you maintain a fit body…and if you’re only job is to work out 2 hours a day…instead of going to some shitty office…it’s not too much to ask…

That said, she still looks good, even if you racists are mad that a man of darker complexion looks like he’s having his way with her because he’s probably rich as fuck…or the door man…I don’t know where this story is going…but look at the pictures..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kate Beckinsale