DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

31

Jul

Michelle Rodriguez and her Weirdo Bikini Selfie Video of the Day

People may not know this based on the bratty behavior of celebrities…but they all love attention. They only moved to Hollywood for attention. There is no talent, there is no passion, there is no art…there is just some asshole who thinks “I’m good looking enough and persistent enough to get myself in movies, make a lot of money and really just carry myself into retirement, because I’m awesome”…and idiots who do casting buy into the bullshit…

Michelle Rodriguez is one of those people, so even with her not being all that famous anymore, she’s running around in a bikini, but more weirdly, creating this bikini videos of herself that remind me of a snuff film or shitty porn…and I’m not going to try to make sense of it, because I don’t care…but I know these motherfuckers love cameras and all of their phones must have so much self produced content of their narcisstic and vain selves…that it’d be disgusting…something I’d expect videos of Michele Rodriguez rolling around to be…only for some reason I dig em…

To See Her in a Bikini FOR THE PAPARAZZI CLICK HERE

Posted in:Michelle Rodriguez

2014

31

Jul

Chrissy Teigen Flashes Some Tit in a Men’s Shirt on Purpose of the Day

No Comments »

Chrissy Teigen is a fame whore, who has never really made much money for herself as a model, as you would probably imagine based on her bloated face and double chin…she’s a bit of a pig…at least when not starving herself for Sports Illustrated season – the only campaign she’s ever got that was really a PR play because she doesn’t get paid for that shit…

She made her money locking down a dude, tricking him into thinking she was the coolest, even his soul made, and behaving long enough for him to Marry her…giving her half his fortune because when they met he was hardly as famous as he is now, so she can take ownership and collect her 50% when it all comes crashing down…

So, the paparazzi spotted her on the street, she pulled outer tit…because that is what you do when your tits are all you have…other than your husbands money…

She was a fan of the site, now she’s an enemy of the site..but who cares…here’s some tit on the street cuz she’s classy.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Chrissy Teigen

2014

31

Jul

Shay Mitchell’s Cleavage and her Dog of the Day

No Comments »

Shay Mitchell is a Pretty Little Liar celebrity, and now she’s a “showing off her cleavage with dogs” fetish site star…not that there is a fetish site for girls with cleavage posing with dogs, but there could be one, since I know at least one person who would jerk off to this….and that person is me…but I’m not doing it because I am overwhelmed with the cuteness of dogs, or because my obsession for dogs has gone past the point of no return, you know into a deep dark place, all because humans are shitty and dogs are amazing…I am doing it because of #tits.

So really, her social media posted cleavage could be in any setting, next to any animal, or inanimate object..It could be in old lady faces, or in her own hands…I will still look….and so will you.

Posted in:Shay Mitchell

2014

31

Jul

Nina Agdal Bikini Campaign of the Day

No Comments »

Nina Agdal is an overrated immigrant hooker who has managed to get into a pretty relevant magazine for Swimsuit companies, and thus has booked at least one or two campaigns, using her silly looking retard head, to sell bikinis….she’s also used that magazine to get herself unprotected sex with Adam Levine, tainting her amazing body, the only thing she had going for her…cuz that retard head is just too handicapped to really fall in love with…but I guess these are decisions people make for security, when swept up by the industry and made famous, especially when they are immigrants and don’t any better. They just hear American music and swoon, even shitty American Music like Maroon 5…so when she finally comes to America…she figures she should let America and the pop culture it pollutes the world with should come to her…it’s really just per being patriotic to her new home..

Either way, here she is in a bikini campaign and it’s boring as fuck.

Posted in:Nina Agdal

2014

31

Jul

Emma Roberts for Jimmy Choo of the Day

No Comments »

Wanna know what I like…Emma Roberts. I don’t know what it is about her, I don’t think she’s insanely hot. I don’t think she’s got this banging body. I don’t really care to see her in a bikini or strutting around for attention…but there’s this element of cute hipster who you’d see in the park reading a book, because reading is super hipster, wearing a pair of short shorts with her ass hanging out…and if you’re lucky with some stray pubic hair sticking out…because hipsters don’t maintain that shit..that wouldn’t be hipster..that would be caring and the first law of hipster is not caring…

Maybe I am into the fact that her dad is some fallen from the top star, who she had to grow up listening to him complaining about the glory days, so caught up in his own self destruction to give her the attention she needed…you know always introducing her to new hot aspiring actors he was slamming…confusing her…giving her the daddy issues I am sure she has…and here she is modelling for shoes…a lot less interesting than her starring in sex scenes..but good enough to look at for 10 seconds than move on…

Posted in:Emma Roberts

2014

31

Jul

Lady Gaga Pretending to be a Cover Model of the Day

No Comments »

Lady Gaga got the Cover of Harper’s because she’s a cover girl. Or maybe she has a good PR team. Or maybe Harper’s owes her a favour from an exclusive she gave them back when she peaked, or maybe despite her record sales, she’s still Lady Gaga, still a huge star, still capable of selling magazines even though magazines are a dying breed….but I guess the people at Harper’s aren’t insane. It’s like you don’t give a sinking ship thanks to no one caring about her antics all the glory, you want until people start mourning its loss…you know like the public did with Michael Jackson. One day a pedophile everyone hated, the next day dead and a legend…you fickle pieces of shit…

That said, they also gave the cover to Penelope Cruz and Linda Evangelista are also cover girls…because Gaga doesn’t deserve anything…if you take a second away from her tits…you’ll see a face that was meant to be behind the scenes…seriously…what a horrible fucking face…

Posted in:Lady Gaga

2014

31

Jul

Models Versus Wind Machine for LOVE Magaizne of the Day

No Comments »

LOVE MAGAZINE just released their new issue, that Kendall Jenner, the “hard working model” who in her delusional rich brat mind, didn’t leverage her sister’s porn, her family reality show, was on the cover of….hard work pays off when your mom has a team.

Anyway they got all the models up against a wind machine, blowing their faces into all kind of weirdness, and for some reason I find it highly erotic, and that reason is called being overexposed to porn and forced to turn to new things besides sex and nudity to get off…

The models are:

Kendall Jenner, Anna Ewers, Caroline Trentini, Charlotte Free, Imaan Hammam, Jing Wen, Julia Bergshoeff, Julia Nobis, Kayla Scott, Natalie Westling & Ysaunny Brito

#newfetish

Posted in:Love Magazine

2014

31

Jul

Ireland Baldwin is a Fucking Monster for some Brand of the Day

No Comments »

I’d like to take a minute from your hectic day to look at these pics of Ireland Baldwin and try to understand why she’s getting work when she’s such a fucking monster…I’m talking some kind of Baldwin Ogre that crawled out of a Bassinger vagina, only to morph into the big and bloated looking trust fund brat, with an identity crisis, who one day is getting married and simulating sex on social media, to the next when she’s dating some black Youtube spoken word/rapper chick…straight from the fucking gutter…It’s like anything to rebel, get noticed, get attention, be different, cause some kind of conflict, when all she needs to do is ride her family name, book a sitcom and shut the fuck up…but instead, like all these other instagram girls, she’s trying to be a model. What the fuck is wrong with people. If I was her, I’d ride that inheritance straight to a tropical island to fucking tan…people have their priorities all fucked up.

Posted in:Ireland Baldwin

2014

31

Jul

Bethenny Frankel See Through of the Day

No Comments »

I don’t know what this is from, or when it is from, it is safe to say that it is part of some PR campaign for this Skinny Girl Margarita drink owner, who was once an annoying Real Housewife, or what I like to call a pile of shit that represents all that you hate in the world…who is now clever enough to use her fake tits, fake tits I am sure she’s used before, in a way fake tits should be used…to get attention….noticed…and in turn to sell lap dances, only for her, the lap dances are for the paparazzi to snap off pics of her mom stomach, on a paddle board…showing nipple that I am sure many people have seen before.

The fact that test people exist is insane to me. As a society – we should have higher standards in who we collectively choose to make rich.

Posted in:Bethenny Frankel

2014

31

Jul

Hipster and her Viral Dance of the Day

No Comments »

Mom jeans, lesbian asymmetric haircut, gladiator sandals and a crop top, with an “obscure” seemingly improvised dance, that you know was choreographed in front of her mirror before going to the music festival to showcase that a little Molly and booze…allows her “free” and “artistic” soul really deliver…

I am not hating, at least she’s having fun, even if her intentions are to be out there and crazy. I just wish this was more naked…you know because as nice as those jeans make her GUNT-AREA…I would prefer to see labia jiggle….

Why can’t labia jiggle be the new hipster trend?

Seriously.

Posted in:Viral Sensation