DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2012

18

Oct

Loren Kemp Nipple for Fault UK of the Day

Loren Kemp is some Dutch model who has probably shown her tits before as models do…and who is showing tits again as models do…because this is what making it in the world of fashion is all about…you know sizing up which skinny girl is willing to get more naked….which is coincidentally also the way to make it in all jobs….because no one likes girls who don’t get naked….whether it’s for selling and marketing clothes….or selling and marketing sex…it’s all the same shit…we’re all a bunch of fucking whores…

Posted in:Loren Kemp

2012

18

Oct

Alessandra Ambrosio Hot Cleavage in Boston of the Day

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Alessandra Ambrosio is showing off her cleavage….in a dress instead of in a bikini or bra for Victoria’s Secret….and I figure I might as well post it…cuz I like Brazilian subtle implants on a small, lean, overpaid figure as much as the next guy, even if I have to accept the fact that she’s had kids and that her vagina has been ravaged, but I guess that’s what you sign up for when dealing with Catholic girls….especially when dealing with ones you’ve never met, won’t meet, and don’t really care to meet, but prefer just staring at their tits in pics when your mistress is at work and you’re waiting for her to come hom to give you a blowjob…

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Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio

2012

18

Oct

Pam Anderson is a Vegas Stripper of the Day

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I kinda appreciate Pam Anderson’s never give up attitude….It’s like she had no talent, no skill, no experience back when she launched her career, but still mananged to make a huge success out of it, and even if her beauty is dying as fast as her liver, she’s still willing to hit up gigs at Vegas strip clubs, where she whores out like she’s not in her 50s, half naked and on all fours, and that is hysterical…..it’s like going to a middle aged costume party on Halloween….only to see so many women half naked…who shouldn’t be half naked….it may not give boners…but it does make for good times….

I’d say she should give up….but where is the fun in that.

Posted in:Pam Anderson

2012

18

Oct

Trying to Look Up Olivia Wilde’s Skirt of the Day

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Olivia Wilde doesn’t matter…you see cuz I don’t really know who she is, other than some twat who gave herself a stage name, because her real last name is COCKBURN….something a little less marketable…even in porn…cuz no one wants their cock to burn…or even a bitch’s name to suggest or put the idea of that in their minds…if anything it is disgusting…..and surprising that none of her ancestors didn’t change their name over the last few generations where cock burns are frowned upon….

But trying to look up her skirt does matter…especially when it is in picture on a computer screen…cuz I can look at this shit from all angles all day hoping to see labia poking out of fancy panties…you see cuz I have a lot of time to kill.

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Posted in:Olivia Wilde

2012

18

Oct

Vanessa and Stella Hudgens Posing in Matching Outfits of the Day

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Sisters dressed the same like they were 5 may be appealing to some of you…but reminds me of little kids playing in the park at a birthday party….meaning it isn’t sexy…unless you factor in that they aren’t little kids…at least one of them isn’t a little kid…and the one who isn’t a little kid is trying to train and whore out the one who is a little kid….so that the one who isn’t a little kid is not the disgrace of the family for leaking nude pics to advance her career….but the one who is a little kid is for whatever whore moves she pulls to stand out from her family’s expectations…and the whole thing is confusing….unless you understand the dynamic of older whore sisters training younger sisters to be bigger whores than they are…you know cuz they paved the way for them….cuz I am pretty sure that’s what is going on here and the parents don’t care….cuz they are getting paid…..

If this post made no sense…I just want you to know it makes perfect sense to me.

Posted in:Stella Hudgens|Vanessa Hudgens

2012

18

Oct

Hayden Panettiere’s Sleepy Fake Tits for Twitter of the Day

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Hayden Panettiere’s implants are really in fashion this season, they are all the rage, and remind the world of shitty tit women that 5,000 dollars can save them the awkwardness of undressing, because perfect, round, almost natural looking tits can balance out their otherwise broad shoulders and back…into making their midget size and shape…a little more lady like…

I used to hate implants and still hate stupid huge implants but I fucking love saving shitty tits from a destiny of shitty tits….and I appreciate Hayden Panettiere exhausting herself promoting this movement and documenting it on twitter.

She’s a hero….and I am not just saying that cuz her only acting job was on a show called heroes…I am saying it cuz her tits are telling me to….it is a super power.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere

2012

18

Oct

Miley Cyrus is Pantsless of the Day

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Miley Cyrus is still kinda exciting…in what is probably the least exciting possible way…you know she puts up pics of her pantsless…rockin’ her lesbian haircut with her friend who looks 11…pulling some hipter teen girl in her vintage clothes just wasting time…when really she should be pantsless in bootleg porn videos after burning through all her child star money like a real child star….but I take what I can get.

Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2012

18

Oct

Alison Brie For Nylon of the Day

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ALISON BRIE is on a show called Community that I have never watched…and she has also BEEN IN LINGERIE FOR GQ …..and HALF NAKED FOR COMPLEX ….and I am not sold on her awkward looking face…but I am into her big old tits…tits I’d like to smear on the cracker that is my penis like they were a nice slice of creamy brie…especially after looking at them being shown off in NYlon….I just wish things didn’t work for her and her birthday party clown gig turned to bachelor party entertainment…you know since she’s built for it…but sometimes things work out for people and they can figure out the legal way to prostitute themselves….godo job Alison Schermerhorn….

Posted in:Alison Brie

2012

18

Oct

Ashley Tisdale Sticking Tongue Out of the Day

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Ugly Face Tisdale is not hiding behind sunglasses, a mask, her hand, or the tools she usually uses to try to divert people’s attention from her below average, even awkward looks….this times he’s hiding behind pixelation…thanks to Instagram filters that make event he most rank girl look like she’s cast in the pages of an erotic magazine from the 70s….and really I prefer seeing less of her tongue and more of her hard work out body…because lets face it…even pixelation can’t save this face but as the girls around her get older and fatter…her body will carry her…and you know what…I am okay with that cuz hot bodies with hag faces are more fun to fuck than hot faces on haggard bodies….so keep up the good work…now put that tongue where it matters….on my asshole…you tease.

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale

2012

18

Oct

Brie Larson Big Cleavage of the Day

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Brie Larson is a child star….who has been trying to regain her child star fame….by pulling stunts like being in her underwear on the internet…..and now showing up to the low level events she is invited to or manages to get herself invited to…since no one knows who she is….wearing her tits…something I have no problem noticing…because even the biggest star is equally irrelevant in my life as this Brie Larson non-star…..I feel like I have a thing for cheese today.

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Posted in:Brie Larson