I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2009

01

Jan

stepLINKS of the Day

I just stayed inside all night. I was thinking about booking a last minute jetset off to Miami to spend the last few hours of 2008 and the first few hours of 2009 with Lohan and Ronson, then I thought maybe I’d hit up Vegas to get Fergie to sign my scrapbook as I waved to her from the dance floor as she hosted some party from the VIP room, then I figured the best bet would be to shoot down to New York and find Katy Perry, Carson Daly and whoever else did that fucking Ryan Seacrest countdown shit and get them to do body shots off my balls like we were all in college, but then I realized I am a fucking hurt bag with no money and I can’t do those kinds of things, and instead I stayed at home on the shit stained couch drinking anything I could find with booze in it, completely alone and it was fucking heaven. I don’t understand why an asshole would pay 200 dollars to be under the same roof, in the same bar as that whore Lohan, or any other shitty fucking celebrity who is getting paid to be there. It’s really a stupid fucking concept, it’s not like you can buy her a shot and get her to suck you off in the bathroom, despite how hungry for cock she is, it’s more like going to the zoo and watching the gorillas mate from 100 feet away. Either way, it’s not an issue I have to deal with.

Fuck New Years Eve, today is the time to get fucking wasted everything is cheaper and I am already drunk and here are some links…

The Best Way to End 2008 With a Bang is By Getting Arrested for Rape
GO

Why Hello Elle Macpherson’s Nipples!
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Lohan Buys Some Granny Panties
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Japanese Marathon
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Because I Know You Are Staying Home Alone Tonight
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Amateurs Galore
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Web Cae Stripdown
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Now THAT’S Some Cinematic Quality
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WTF Happened to Joaquin Pheonix?
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Remember Those Stills of Marisa Tomei Naked?
Well Here is the Moving Clips
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Star Jones is Slowly Turning Into Jahba the Hutt Again
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LESBIAN VAMPIRE KILLERS LOOKS LIKE THE BEST MOVIE EVER
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Tori Spelling Wants to Let the World Know About Her Eating Disorder One Paid Magazine Article At a Time
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Here’s That 1 Versus 100 Prank Again
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Because There is No Fucking Way You Have a Date Tonight
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Luna Rubs One Out
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Solange is Looking Good on The Beach
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Jenny McClain is on the Street
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A Cat Fight Always Makes Me Smile
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Brawl at the Mall
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Anna Strips Down
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When You Play Wth Fire(works) You Get Burned
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Train Crash Test
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Start the New Year Off With a Bang
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Pimp My….Nerf Gun?
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Miss Pole Dancer Barcelona
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More Kanye West Insanity From His Personal Blog
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And I Thought I Was Fucking Fat
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Teen Nudes Are Always Good For Something
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Roseario Dawson is Sending a Message Out About Something Or Another
Hopefully Its About Me Banging the Shit Out of Her
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Alessandra Ambrosio Loves the Snow
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Because Even a Horny, Drunk Chick on NYE May Not Sleep With You Easily
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Britney Spears Topless (sort of)
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Christina By the Waterfall
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Tis the Season to do sledding Double Back Flips
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Bypass Cabel Locks. In Case You Want to Fuck With Your Cable
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Bruno and I Have More in Common Than I Thought
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Fuck GPS Systems
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Random Time Wasters
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

31

Dec

Eddie Murphy Entertains White Chicks in Bikinis for New Years Eve of the Day

So Eddie Murphy’s busted out his guitar on what looks like his yacht for a couple of white girls who probably feel like they’ve won the lottery because Eddie Murphy chose them out of a line of prostitutes to be his vacation buddies. All they have to do is laugh at his jokes and make him feel like he’s still in his funny prime, before all those Nutty Professor and Meet the Krumps bullshits came out. Nothing wrong with using your money to make friends and alienate pussy, I’m pretty sure I’d be doin’ the fuckin same, instead, I am planning my New Years Eve night to involve drinking this 40 of vodka in hopes of passing out alone before midnight, because tonight is the most over-rated party night of the year and I’d rather save myself for tomorrow when all the cunts who went out tonight will be at home hungover and crying about how shitty their night was despite all the high hopes we had.

If I had a TV, I’d be ringing in the New Year with you Ryan Seacrest because we are soulmates I’d love to murder-suicide in a fit of passion. True story…

and here’s a closer look at the girls and their asses…

Posted in:Bikini|Eddie Murphy|White Chicks

2008

31

Dec

Lisa Rinna’s Got Good Fake Tits for New Years Eve of the Day

The real reason I hate breast implants is because the girls who get them change their mousy attitudes into something I find annoying. They become the Spring Break college girl who I hate, and their new found confidence is irritating for a guy who likes girls who have no confidence. I don’t like the new found attention they get over a set of tits and I don’t like that they get addicted and keep getting refills like shit was Subway, and end up looking like robots with hardened silicone busting out of the seams to match their usually hardened face, but every once in a while a Lisa Rinna comes along with her plastic surgery addicted face and her set of fake tits that I guess she’s kept hanging for a bunch of years, cuz shit aren’t offensive and almost look like they’d be good enough to take a nap on and by nap I mean titty fuck…..now all she’s gotta do is lift that melting ass and she’d be a half decent 50 year old plastic piece of shit.

Posted in:Bikini|Fake Tits|Lisa Rinna

2008

31

Dec

Beyonce’s Fat Ass in a Bikini for New Years Eve of the Day

If you’re wondering why Jay Z cheated on Beyonce with Rihanna inspiring her “if I was a boy” song, here’s your answer…She’s got a pretty shitty body. Now, for those of you who like thick women, don’t get mad at me, because even she knows that Popeye Chicken lifetime supply sponsorship from 5 years ago was a bad idea, otherwise she wouldn’t be swimming in her fucking dress and prancing around with something covering her dumpy ass, like the fat teenage girls in my high school did when we had an activity day at the water park and they insisted on wearing their T-Shirts. Their reasoning was to protect their fragile pasty white skin from the sun it never saw because they were too busy spending the summer inside eating, but we all knew they were just trying to avoid the shame from our pointing, laughing and disgust.

Sure, the only rippling my body has going for it is when I jump and shit jiggles, but I’m not the one getting paparazzi pictures taken of me, so maybe this bitch should try out an eating disorder in 2009, despite the low blood sugar fits of rage, the possible heart failure and the weakness and discomfort, it could be good for her marriage and more importantly, in her quest to take on Rihanna in the fight for her husband’s penis and the public’s acceptance.

Bonus – here she is getting a tan, even though I already thought she had one of those….

Posted in:Beyonce|Bikini|Fat Ass

2008

31

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

I have a new New Year’s Resolution. That’s to always post my stepLINKS 4 days late to confuse you fuckers. Also on the list, cheat on my wife at least twice as much as I have this year, to make a bigger mockery of our marriage. I’d also like to spend a week eating nothing but cheese and I want to volunteer at a mental institution and switch up the meds to see how that pans out. I got so many things on the list and thanks to my lack of ambition, I’ll just keep living my life like I was Rihanna featuring T.I.

Mike Lohan wrote me an email, I won’t bother responding because it’s boring, but he did call me Lucifer

Wow what venom and what a dark soul. For your information Lucifer…

Her went on some rant about his life that I didn’t bother reading because I don’t give a fuck, but I admit that I liked that he called me Lucifer. Pretty big accomplishment when shit comes from a Born Again….

Now here are some more links cuz they cover my ass when I am sitting by the pool and by pool I mean my wife’s epileptic dog’s vomit in the corner of the room she didn’t clean up because she was all concerned he had a seizure, which is understandable….because he’s so cute.

A Dildo Collection
GO

Amit Freidman Will Get Your Motor Running
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Elle Macpherson’s Bikini is Teeny Tiny
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Melissa Haro Talks About Getting Naked
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Heroin(e) Problem
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Car Troubles?
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Curvey Gisele
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More Life After College
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Meet Oxana Fedorova
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And Here is Proof Madonna is Fucking Nasty
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Milla Jojovich Panty Upskirt
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You Know, I Hate Puff Daddy, But I Gotta Hand It to Him Just This Once
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I Wonder If Victoria Silvstedt Keeps Her Heels On When She Fucks?
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Porn Comes From Here
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Why Does Jessica Alba Have to Be Such a Bitch All The Time
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Diamonds Are a Girls Best Friend
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Remember Mr. Bean?
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Keri is Having Fun By the Pool
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Heather Summers Has Quite the Ass
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Find Someone to Fuck, Because I Know Whatever Else You Have Planned Tonight Sucks
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And That’s Why Chicks Shouldn’t Play With Guns
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Card Throw Ninja
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Louise Glover and Her Big Old Tits
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How Could This Not End in a Face Plant?
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Laser Christmas Tree
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Man, Drew Barrymore’s Vagina Must Be Getting Tired
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Because The Rest Of Us Already Have Our Plans For NYE
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And I Thought My Cruise Was Bad
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Ana Beatriz Barros is Rather Attractive
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Jewel Plays in the Leaves
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Australia Hates Paris Hilton
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The Most Disturbing Animals On Earth
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Some Vintage Bai Ling Craziness
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Because No One Wants to Spend NYE Alone
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Melinda Messenger Has Cleavage
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Dumpster Cart Fun
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Lindsey in Black Lingerie
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Dance Like Michael Jackson in Thriller
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Donatella Versace is a Hot Piece
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Maybe Nicole Richie Isn’t SO Bad Afterall
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Pete Wentz Drank Assleeee’s Breast Milk
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Gotta See Religulous
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Oops! My Pussy Farted
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Lohan in Some Hot Lesbian Action….
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Some Slut Jamie Hammer Being Sexy and Funny….
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Her Name is Scott Taylor Compton, She’s Been in a Bunch of no name shit, and now she’s pulling a Miley in Some Self-Shot Panty Pics…
GO

ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Some Naked Asian Chick
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Girl on Girl Action
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS

2008

31

Dec

The Paparazzi Broke Alba’s Mirror of the Day

Let’s hope next time around they cut the brake line…..but only if that works in causing serious enough car accidents that bitch disappears. I like when the guy I assume is Cash “Vagina Destroyer” Warren tries to muscle the paparazzi and gets shoved when he grabs at a camer and runs away with his tail between his legs like a little girl. I mean they break your car and when you try to tough guy them because you’re so fucking angry and can’t stomach the idea of sending your assistant to use 200 dollars of your millions of dollars to fix the shit, they shove you and make you run to your car and back to you cushy fuckin’ life, kinda like pouring salt on a wound and by pouring salt on a wound I mean prove you have a vagina. Good times.

Posted in:Jessica Alba|Paparazzi

2008

31

Dec

Sexually Charged Video of the Day

I don’t know this girl Muffy is, but if you like black girls and want to see them dancing around in their underwear, workout wear, hanging in the bath while singing about how you shouldn’t hate her because her diamonds are “hella rocky” and some other useless shit, this video will give you something to jerk off to.

Posted in:Music Video|Sex

2008

31

Dec

Chelsy Davy’s Back in Her Bikini of the Day

I was sent these hacked pictures of Chelsy Davy and no one gave a fuck. She’s the girl who’s been using her vagina to get to into the Royal Family in England because the throne hasn’t been overthrown yet, not that they have any real power, but for some reason these pictures of her and her weak chin with her ginger pubed prince are making the rounds and I figured I’d throw them up like I care, kinda like she gets up on top and acts like she cares everytime she has sex with the motherfucker, in hopes that that shit will lead to a motherfucking ring, fairy tale wedding and the official title of Princess, because her rich dad telling her that she’s one by spending all his “hard” earned money from running African Safaris on her to keep her out of his hair up in boarding school, just isn’t good enough….

Girls like this are just too high maintenance.

Posted in:Bikini|Chelsy Davy

2008

31

Dec

Ed Hardy’s Wife’s Dumpy Body in a Bikini of the Day

I heard Ed Hardy’s designer/founder and very rich motherfucker doesn’t let his wife wear his Ed Hardy bikini and throws her in this Gucci shit because it ruins his marketing image of strippers, porn sluts and tacky club sluts with fake tits shoving Magnums of Grey Goose up their dried up coke slut cunts….the truth is that although she’s not very tight bodied or worth fucking, despite being worht half of his fortune, I am just surprised she doesn’t have a dick because nothing screams “I take it up the ass” like a french accent and a name like “Christian Audigier” and a job making the loudest fuckin’ T-shirts around. Seriously, maybe he should be the one in the fuckin’ bikini.


To See More Pictures of Her Ass You Better Follow This Link….Because The Paparazzi Will Sue Me….
GO

Posted in:Bikini|Ed Hardy|wife

2008

30

Dec

Women Would Turn Down Sex For the Internet of the DAy

So close to 50% of people would give up sex if it mean keeping the internet. I guess that means it’s here to stay. I guess it’s good news for all of you too, because the girls who were willing to answer such a stupid fucking survey were all World of Warcraft players on a break and have never had sex anyway, so keep them in their fat chick basements is what I say. I know that I have yet to find a hot chick who uses the internet and I am convinced shit’s like it was back in 1996 and every girl I talk to is a 45 year old dude, just waiting to break the news to me after they convince me to jerk off on camera for them. I guess information like this also makes you feel better about the fact that the only sex you have ever had was masturbating to some porn site and now you know you’re not alone or some shit.

Posted in:Internet|Sex