I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2007

15

Nov

I am – Hayden Panettiere is Ugly of the Day

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The problem is the world is that people can never agree on anything. If everyone agreed on everything, there’d be no fights, there’d be no differences, there’d be no hate, and despite that being boring as fuck at least I’d be able to drive the fact that Hayden Panettiere is not fuckin’ hot down all your fuckin’ throats, because my new pet peeve is that bitch is being seen as some kind of sex symbol, when she should be doin’ backflips at the local carnival or workin’ stunts on a Japanese Game Show…

The weirdest shit for me is when I see a hot girl and turn to my friend and point her out, not because having a friend is pretty unheard of, which it is, but because dude never agrees with my choices. Some dudes like blondes, some like brunettes, some like young, some like old, some like chubby with fat titties, some like skinny, some like short and some like tall, some like anything they can get their dicks in, some only like supermodels and can’t get it up for table scraps but never get supermodels, so spend a lot of time jerking off all over themselves.

But I have faith and feel like we should all be able to agree that Hayden is about as attractive as the bucket of shit we had lying around my apartment when our toilet broke and my wife refused to take shit out to dump in the alley until it was overflowing….it’s nice to see stalky/stumpy bitches getting work, but constantly telling them how hot they are isn’t positive affirmation, it’s lies and the equivalent of telling a retard he’s a genius because he figured out that smashing his helmeted head against the wall til he bleeds isn’t as fun as he originally thought it was and went back to hitting rocks together like he’s supposed to. Retards are always good times.


Related Posts:

Hayden Panettiere and Her Dogs
Hayden Panettiere Making Sex Faces
Hayden Panettiere is King of the Midgets
Hayden Panettiere is Flashing Her Bikini for the Dolphins

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Stalky|Ugly|Unsorted

2007

15

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I decided that I am tired of being impotent and shit’s a mind over matter situation. I realize that my wife is fucking disgusting and I can’t stomach the thought of slammin’ her, but I am convinced that young hot girls will be able to fix my problem. I tell myself it’s the booze and hard living, but I feel like if I believe shit will work proper it will. So I’m now on that hustle and willing to take applications from any hot sluts out there who think they have to skills to bring me back to life and are willing to get busy.

The funniest thing about girls, is that any chick you talk to is convinced they give the best head in the world. They are convinced they are the best fuck, and as of today, I am willing to take anyone up on their confidence and report back on the site about it because I am pretty convinced that you can’t get me off, but you can sure as hell try.

Remember, this site’s only for hot chicks now, so if you haven’t left yet, go, you’re ruining our sexy party, you fuckin’ buzzkill.

Here are my links:

The Crazy Cat Fight on a Shot at Love With Ass Shots Video…I guess it’s true that love hurts….
GO

A Set of Tits Doing Math
GO

Miss Italy 1991 – Topless and Bending Over in a Bikini
GO

Britney Gets Her Fat Sucked Out
GO

Miranda Kerr is Hot in this Victoria’s Secret Commercial
GO

Some Pervert Hides in the Bathroom and Records Unsuspecting Girls Peeing…Watch Out….
GO

Bjorn Borg – Tennis Star’s Got a New Underwear Line….So Here are Pics of Girls Wearing His Shit and By Shit I Mean Bras and Panties…
GO

Jessica Alba at Some Movie Premiere Lookin’ Boring
GO

Prince is on a Mission to Destroy the Internet
GO

Some Hot Slut Named Bianca Balti in GQ Italy
GO

An Andy Warhol Portrait of Liz Taylor Sold for 24 Million Dollars
GO

The Pixyland Internet Celebrity is Getting Married to a Woman…
GO

Office Hackysack Video
GO

Kelly Ripa’s got a Weird Fucking Belly Button You Want to Fuck – Weirdo
GO

Melissa Midwest Gets Painted by Baseball Player Aubrey Muff
GO

Rihanna Performing in Her S&M Outfit
GO

Some Mardi Gras Brawl Video
GO

Justin Timberlake Gets Jessica Biel a Surfboard for Xmas and Sex Wax, Which is Code for a Sex Change…
GO

Some Ronald McDonald Mash Up Video that Scares Me
GO

Some Tattooed Chick Posing Naked Video
GO

Rumer Willis is Going to Be a Golden Globe Girl….Because She’s Got Some Serious Career Going On
GO

Dudes Who Look Like Lesbians Blog
GO

Henry Rollins Hates DJ AM As Much as I Do- Video
GO

Some Girl Shows Off Her Tits By Pouring Water on Her Wifebeater Video
GO

Hayden Panettiere Showing Off her Stubby Self and Big Head and Cleavage
GO

Some Girls Naked Ass on the Computer
GO

Lesbian Video of the Day
GO

Paris Hilton is a Not So Private Dancer
GO

Some Canadian Hockey Player on the Maple Leafs Sends a Girl Nudes and She Throws them Up Online
GO

Girls Best Friend Is The Vibrator and They Prove It For You as a Group
GO

Some Girl Thinks She’s Hotter than She Is and Takes Pics of Herself Half Naked….I Blame All The Dudes Who Complimented her Along the Way to Get in Her Pants Making Her Believe it. FUCK YOU.
GO

Look at the last pic in this set, it’s like “Oh what did i just do”
GO

Lance Armstrong’s Kid Takes the Olsen Stepmother to her School’s Show and Tell
GO

A Little Ali Lohan Action cuz She’s the New Lindsay or at Least is Trying to Be
GO

The Victoria’s Secret Angels Get a Star on the Walk of Fame
GO

Lesbian Ronson’s Sister – Charlotte
GO

Girls Dyking Out hard at an All Girls Party
GO

Carrie Underwood Doin Some Christmas Concert Bullshit Cuz You Like Christmas, Even Though No One Buys You Gifts
GO

Girls Fucking Machines…
GO

Some Weird Japanese Fetish With a Girl Rockin a Strap-On Slammin a Stuffed Animal
GO

Use This Spray to Get Laid
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – Rachel Bilson Does Santa Claus of the Day

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There was a time when I used to dress up as Santa Claus at some shitty discount strip mall to make some extra money because Christmas is expensive, even when you don’t buy anyone in your family gifts because you hate them.

I used to sit there thinking about how much I’d rather have the mother’s of these annoying crying kids sitting on my lap asking me for dirty things for Christmas, that’s how I got through the job, but also the reason I got fired, because one time I had a little too much to drink before my shift and this slutty mother with the biggest tits walked up to me, put her kid on my lap and bent over, tits hanging out trying to calm her kid and my mind started racing and I got a boner…..the boss wasn’t impressed that Santa practically came all over his bright red suit like he was coming to town, while a 4 year old was on his lap.

I guess even ghetto stores frown on pedophilia, even when the whole concept of Santa is one of a man who sneaks into homes and lures little boys and girls with presents their parents can’t affort, like this dude I met who hangs with teenage boys and buys them things in exchange for them cleaning his house in their underwear…..

Either way, Rachel Bilson is one of those girl’s I wouldn’t mind giving my candy cane to, and by candy cane I mean impregnating her with tongue, because my penis doesn’t work, unfortunately for her, my rotting mouth doesn’t smell like peppermint, but she can always pretend. Cuddles.


Related Posts:

Rachel Bilson and Her Dog
Rachel Bilson Eating Cheetos
Rachel Bilson is Fucking Hayden Christensen

Posted in:Hot|Rachel Bilson|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – Vanessa Minnillo’s Ass Shopping of the Day

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I got a thing for watching useless d-list celebrities shopping, mainly because it reminds me that a lot of people who suck at life are doing a lot better than I am, and that is the kind of re-affirmation I need to continue hating myself.

While leaving the bar last night, I ended up seeing one really hot chick and her ugly friend walking down the other side of the street with bikes in one hand and the front tire in the other. I have a thing for girls who steal bikes , that shit is like porn to me, so I decided to run up to them and see what the deal was, hoping I’d have a better outcome than the last time.

The hot girl was decent with me and joking around about how they stole bikes, but her friend went fucking crazy on me for being english. She was telling me how fat and ugly I am and how I lack culture because I don’t speak their fuckin’ language. She went on about how French is Montreal and how I have no business being there, so when I asked it that meant she wouldn’t let me watch her masturbate she fuckin’ lost it and tried to have a fight with me. I was fucking wasted and felt like punching a bitch in the face woulda made for a good end to my night, so I tried to convince her to hit me first, but she just got in her cab, with her stolen bikes and drove out of my life.

Reality is, I don’t hit girls but I woulda used to opportunity to just tried to wrestle her to the ground and start makin’ out with her, because fighting with girls is embarrassing, because I know she would have won.

Speaking of winning, it looks like Nick Lachey didn’t win the lottery with this slut after spending a couple years slammin’ Jessica Simpson, this is a step down, but she’s still better lookin’ than I am and even if that isn’t saying much, it’s sayin’ something…like I’d still watch her touch her toes, over and over and over….


Related Posts:

Vanessa Minnillo Fully Nude
Nick and Vanessa In the Hot Tub

Posted in:Ass|Nipple|Shopping|Tits|Unsorted|Vanessa Minnillo

2007

14

Nov

I am – Nicole Scherzinger’s Bra is Rockin’ the Vote of the Day

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Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger wants you to rock the vote, because her publicist probably told her it’d be a good idea to attend the event, while her stylist felt that it’d be hot for her to wear some intense bra under her lowcut shirt for a reason I’ll never understand, because there’s nothing worse than a girl in a backless dress and a bra, or a tube top with bra straps hanging out. I am guessing it’s because this bitch needs all the support she can get, because she even old bitches who look like some kind of live action real doll need the magic of a wonderbra too.

I was at some bar last night drinking and this young girl in a jewish outfit of the day was dancing on the stage rockin’ the stripper pole. She ended up pulling down her dress and I was all excited to see some tit only to reveal some American Apparel leotard shit that she was wearing under her dress. I didn’t understand what the fuck she was doing with all these layers, it was some kind of shit that will annoy the motherfucker who ended up taking her home, because dude’s gotta be some kind of David Blaine to undress her. Maybe she was trying to be funny, like these whores I played strip poker with a couple of months ago. I fucking hate all board games and card games, because I guess I hate fun and feel like a fucking asshole when doing it, but the idea of seeing these young whores naked was enough to make me give into the gayness. What I didn’t know was that they were each wearing 5 pairs of fucking socks, 2 pairs of pants and 3 pairs of underwear and I don’t even thing I got them down to the bottom layer. Shit was like trying to get to the middle of a tootsie pop, but didn’t taste as good.


Related Posts:

Nicole Scherzinger’s Baby Love Video
Pussycat Doll’s Pussy Cleavage
Pussycat Dolls Performing
Pam Anderson is a Pussycat Doll

Posted in:Bra|cleavage|Nicole Scherzinger|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – Christina Aguilera’s Pregnancy Belly of the Day

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I never understood the pride a girl takes into being pregnant. I always see these pregnant girls rubbing their bellies and posing in pictures holding their stomachs or even taking pictures showing the progression of how big they get. We get it, you’re pregnant, you fuck and you let a dude cum inside you and now you’ve got some parasite growing inside of you that you would probably be better off hiding away because you don’t always have to constantly remind us that you’re damaged goods. There’s no point in making a fucking spectacle of it….

Single mother’s are easy pickings at the bar. They rarely go out and when they do it’s because they want to fuck and that may be a good time, because they have all this other shit going on in their lives, so they only want your cock and if they want some repeat business, and call you to hook up, they just want to hook up. They generally don’t want their kids knowing how much of a whore they are, so they try to keep you as far away from them as possible and you always get with them on nights when the kid is at the father’s, which is one about 4 days a month, so it makes for a good time, with little amount of effort to put in. The problem is that the second they get hooked on you and think you’re a good guy, is the second you become a fuckin’ real stepfather, and as a stepfather, I can tell you that it fucking sucks. You have to put up with shit from annoying kids that aren’t yours, so it’s really like dating 2 or 3 people, instead of dating the one you’re fuckin’…..not to mention, becoming a family man takes away from getting pussy from other girls, because they feel like homewreckers and despite some girls getting off to that shit, it’s a hard fuckin’ sell. Not that any of this really affects you, you have enough trouble having sex with yourself, because you’ve been doing it for so long it’s become a chore, like having sex with your wife after being married for 30 years and she’s no longer than hot piece she once was.

Either way, Christina doesn’t make a hot pregnant chick, she looks like the town whore who had one too many abortions and had no choice but to bring the baby to term. All her make-up doesn’t hide the fact that her time in every teenage boys masturbation fantasies is done….because she’s going to be a fuckin’ mom…..and that shit is worse than AIDS, unless you’re the baby daddy, then it’s just a smart business decision.


Related Posts:

Christina Aguilera’s Pregnancy Tits
Christina Aguilera’s Insane Cleavage in China
stepTV does Christina Aguilera’s Tour Bus

Posted in:Belly|Christina Aguilera|Pregnant|Tits|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – Tara Reid Showing Up Late for Work of the Day

Image Removed due to Papparazzi

Here are some pictures of Tara Reid showing up an hour late for work in Vancouver probably from a late night drinking. I am running late today too and it’s probably for the same reason. Based on what she’s wearing, you’d think she was showing up for the afternoon shift at the strip club and not showing up to some movie set.

I used to park outside the strip club back when I had a driver’s license and my neighbor’s car keys, before getting charged with a DUI and losing that shit and leaving my neighbor’s shit box on the side of the highway, and all the daytime strippers would show up like this. They’d be wearing their club slut coat, with track pants and a haggard face from an abusive night before, only to get inside and take the shit off for a dude who pays them 10 dollars a song, which rarely happened because it was the afternoon shift. I guess there are a lot of similarities between Tara Reid’s career and an afternoon stripper, because makin’ money rarely happens which is too bad because she still owes money on her implants she bought on credit.

Either way, I am not a fashionable person. I don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong and I generally don’t give a fuck about what a girl is wearing, I am more into what a girl isn’t wearing and how I am going to get them to take off whatever they are wearing to do a little dance for me. But that’s just because I love dancing.


Related Posts:

Tara Reid Hot in FHM Magazine
Tara Reid’s See Through Shirt
Tara Reid’s Bikini Pictures
Tara Reid’s Old Man Ass

Posted in:Haggard|Late|Tara Reid|Unsorted

2007

14

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I’ve been sitting in a Starbucks for the last 6 hours because my wife is having one of those days where she smells really bad and I can’t deal with it despite that fact that I married it.

I was hoping I’d see something interesting happen but then I realized that interesting people don’t do coffee shops. All I got was some girl who’s age I was betting on with some pervert who was lookin’ at her tits with me, I was aiming for 18 because it makes me feel less dirty but he was convinced she was 14 and was so into it.

Then I had to deal with pregnant couples make lame pregnant couple jokes, that made me realize exactly what their lives at home are like and their happiness was fucking offensive, I thought pregnant bitches were supposed to be hormonal and have some edge, not giving high fives to their baby daddy’s like they are the biggest fucking cunts on the planet.

Then some old creepy dude seemed to be chatting up this young dude by asking him what music he likes and asking him what websites he downloads shit from, then dude went into chatting about how he’s missing Law and Order SVU, because that’s his favorite but he also likes criminal minds and CSI, then he invited the young dude over for a jam session…which I can only assume in his mind meant cummin on dude’s ass before pullin’ the tricks he’s learnt on all his crime shows….I thought about calling the cops, but figured I’d write about instead, I don’t like cops that much and I also don’t like the staff of Starbucks, I saw them hand out at least 50 free drinks to their homies who rolled through, while I sat there like an asshole nursing my coffee for 6 hours, like I was an 18 year old punk in a strip club nursing my 10 dollar beer because I only had enough money for one beer and wanted to take in as much pussy as I could but was scared they’d kick me out if I was sitting there running on empty…

Fuck starbucks, here are my links….

Claudia Schiffer in a See Through Dress at the Beach
GO

A Bunch of Stupid Brown People Try To Flip Over a Car
GO

Some Sex Ringtone Prank That You’ve Probably Already Seen But is New To Me
GO

Some Indian Man Marries His Dog….
GO

Christina Aguilera’s Baby Shower Video….
GO

Some Russian Snowboarding Behind a Train Because Russians Are Insane
GO

Owen Wilson’s Dating Some Model Named Le Call(girl) here are her Lingerie Pictures
GO

Miss Nude World Girls Kissing Topless on Howard Stern
GO

A WHole Lot of Sluts at A Car Show
GO

Paris Hilton is Either Pregnant or Bloated but I think Neither Are Possible Since Her Lady Parts Fell Out a Couple Years Ago, So Maybe She’s Just Fat
GO

Sex in the Internet Cafe
GO

Chelsy Davy is Prince Harry’s Girlfriend Who Dumped Him For Texting Other Chicks…These Are Pictures of Her Emotionally Wrecked Over the Whole Thing…Dude’s a Prince and Could Easily Get Better Pussy….Or at Least Pussy That Doesn’t Dump Him For Talking To Other Pussy….and Joins In the Fun….
GO

More Pictures of the Sharon Stone Camel Toe
GO

Kelly Clarkson’s Been Emotionally Eating Her Body into a Fat Chick
GO

Meet the Gentle Giant – Who’s Pretty Fuckin Weird Lookin and Will Give You Nightmares
GO

Christina Aguilera All Bundled Up While Pregnant…I Guess The Air Conditioning in LA is Strong
GO

The Coolest Crazy Homeless Person I’ve Seen Today
GO

The Duffgusting Sisters Hang With Fat Dudes in a Purse to Make Them Look Skinnier
GO

Some Wardrobe Malfunction Business on Some Gameshow
GO

A Little More Haylie Duff Because Bitch is Fucking Weird Looking…
GO

Shakira is an Wild and Adventurous Columbian Because She Wears Animal Prints
GO

Boy George is Charged With Kidnapping Some Homo and Chaining Him To The Wall
GO

Sluts Getting Down and Dirty with Each Making Their Parents Proud
GO

Some Angie Harmon (who?) on the Cover of Shape Magazine with a Hot Photoshopped Body
GO

French Chicks Like Wine…A lot…
GO

Jailbait for You To Get Arrested Over of the Day
GO

Brooke Hogan Working Out Pictures
GO

Kristy Roche is Some Girl Who Is Posing Half Naked in Ralph Magazine
GO

The Karashians Are Signed for Season 2 – Exclusive – Thanks Ryan Seacrest
GO

Some Site is Name Dropping Me When Talking About Tits…Because I Am an Expert on Tits, I guess You Need a Set to Really Understand Them, Thanks Beer.
GO

These People are Turning into Trees and It’s Fucking Disgusting
GO

Sarah Silverman’s Aids Song is Offensive Because I Hate Her
GO

The Top 20 Side Boobs of All Time
GO

Battle Of The Bust
GO

Lookin’ Good Sweetheart
GO

Lohan’s Newest Addiction…Buying Expensive Purses…Look at Her Face…Looks Like She’s Scoring Crack
GO

Vivica Fox Showing Off Her Body in Some Half Naked Photoshoot
GO

Some Celebrity I’ve Never Heard of Steals Other People’s Tip Money…Because That’s the Way I Tip a Bartender….too
GO

Jonah Ray’s Freeloaders Guide To Internet Dating
GO

Reese Witherspoon is on the Cover of Southern Beauty Magazine
GO

Jordan / Katie Price Dresses Like a Nun For Her Husband in Bed Cuz She’s So Naughty
GO

Some Chinese Dude Cookin’ Rats for Dinner Because That’s What Hungry People Do
GO

Some Chick Named Gabriela’s Got some Big Fuckin’ Tits
GO

The Hottest Ass of the Year
GO

Dude With 8 Cocks Keeps Some Slag Busy….
GO

Kathy Griffen’s Husband is a Lookin’ Good Sweetheart…But Then Again So Is She…It’s So Nice When Ugly People Find Love…
GO

Some Webcam Chick Stripping
GO

Vintage Lesbian Video
GO

Mike Tyson’s Greatest moments:
GO

Anna Beatriz Barros Lookin’ Insanely Hot in These Posed Pics
GO

From Photobucket:

Some Dude Posts a Couple Pics of Some GIrls Taking Nude Pics Together on their Camera Phone For Him
GO

Some Girl Shows Off Her Nakedness
GO

From the Forum:

Some UT Drama Major – Acting Naked
GO

Some Chick Named Susanna is a Cocktease
GO

Some New Suicide GIrl Download
GO

Celeste Fox is a Porn Site that Does Good
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Ashlee Simpson’s Lookin’ Alright of the Day

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I have decided to make my site for hot chicks and only hot chicks so if you aren’t a hot chick, leave and never come back, this place isn’t for you. If you are a hot chick, then hey baby, what’s up? Do you come here often? You know I write this site don’t you? Does that make you want to shower for me? Let’s get busy.

That’s enough dreamin’, I know you are a dude and I am over it, but I am not over this Simpson sister because Ashlee’s lookin’ better than usual, I guess dating fags does good things for a girl. He probably does her hair and make-up and dresses her to look stylish, before crying himself to sleep and writing about it for his next Fall Out Boy song about how misunderstood he is. Or maybe the Botox she’s getting at 23 to make her eyes look bigger is pullin’ through. By the time bitch hits 30 she may end up doing Kanye West’s mother’s dance, I hear it’s like Souja Boy, but more dead.

Yeah, I know Soulja Boy is dying fast, but it’s still alive enough for my joke to make sense, even if my joke wasn’t funny.


Related Posts:

Ashlee Simpson Dates Bi-Sexuals
Some Ashlee Simpson Bikini
More Ashlee Simpson’s Bikini
Ashlee Simspon’s Nipple

Posted in:Ashlee Simpson|cleavage|Hot|Unsorted

2007

13

Nov

I am – Lohan is Hanging With Her Lesbian Cock Ronson of the Day

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So it seems like Lohan’s fallen off the wagon or is at least about to fall off the wagon and that gets me excited because she’s going to be more accessible. I don’t actually think she’s ever been on a wagon, but that’s only because her parents turned her into a money making machine when she was a kid and when you’re a money making machine, there’s not time to play and also because I am sure the rehab center she was at were letting her do whatever fucking drugs she wanted because she was a great marketing tool for them.

That said, she’s back with the Lesbian Cock Ronson and where there’s lesbian cock there’s cocaine, especially when that lesbian cock is a bad DJ, because she needs that shit to get the confidence to go on stage and make a fool of herself without realizing it. Powdered Courage baby…you should try it.

Bonus: Steve Aoki – Lohan’s Homey is in some videogame and it made me laugh


Related Posts:

Lohan Lookin’ Wrecked
Lohan is Partying Drunk
Lohan Lookin’ Wrecked
Lohan Doing Cocaine Screen Shots
Lohan is a Drunken Party Slut

Posted in:Lesbian Cock|Lindsay Lohan|Samantha Ronson|Unsorted