Carmen Electra is one of those girls that you want to dis but there is really nothing about them that annoys you, other than the fact that she is a huge cocktease. She looks good, she’s in shape and she knows she’s a d-lister. She does infomercials, striptease aerobic DVDs, shitty MTV shows and the odd acting job and looks good doing it. She knows she’s useless and that her tits and ass have got her to where she is and I can’t really dis her for that. If I had my way all the girls I ever associate with or have to see would be bomb hot. I figured out a long time ago, that all bitches have issues and take effort, so if you’re going to be putting up with shit and investing energy, it might as well be to get shit thrown at you by a hot bodied girl than some fat nasty bitch…..Carmen Electra may tease all our cocks, but I’d rather be getting my cock teased by her, than actually getting pussy from a Carnie Wilson grade slag…That’s my story. Did you like it? You fuckin’ dirtbag.

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I am not good with distinguishing different shades of brown, but I think the bitch with the stroller is some kind of Filipino nanny. Proving that Carnie is the fat lazy cunt we all knew she was. I assume none of you know or care about this bitch, but she was the fat one in Wilson Phillips, the hottest band for chicks (and closet cased poofters) in the 90’s. Anyway, she’s one of those slobs that 90 percent of you Fat Americans associate with, because she had gastric bipass surgery on the internet and lost 100 pounds, because bitch couldn’t figure out how the trendmill worked, she was too busy eating cookies. Lucky for us, her pregnancy let her hit the cookie jar again, eating for 2 was a good excuse to go nuts on it. Now she’s really inflated and built likeKool Aid….I am sure her husbands really happy about all this.

BONUS

Carnie Wilson Posed Nude for Playboy!

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I am not good with distinguishing different shades of brown, but I think the bitch with the stroller is some kind of Filipino nanny. Proving that Carnie is the fat lazy cunt we all knew she was. I assume none of you know or care about this bitch, but she was the fat one in Wilson Phillips, the hottest band for chicks (and closet cased poofters) in the 90’s. Anyway, she’s one of those slobs that 90 percent of you Fat Americans associate with, because she had gastric bipass surgery on the internet and lost 100 pounds, because bitch couldn’t figure out how the trendmill worked, she was too busy eating cookies. Lucky for us, her pregnancy let her hit the cookie jar again, eating for 2 was a good excuse to go nuts on it. Now she’s really inflated and built likeKool Aid….I am sure her husbands really happy about all this.

BONUS

Carnie Wilson Posed Nude for Playboy!

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I went to the strippers again last night. That made for 2 nights in a row at the same bar. I saw a few of the same strippers including the bitch I called table scarps on Thursday. I found out her name is destiny, and I love the fact that she rocks a Roxy Bikini and not a trashy stripper outfit, but I don’t like the fact that she cant’s dance and has a dumpy ass. I also saw Drea the stripper who fucked me over in a lap dance by telling me that we’d make out in the booth 3 weeks ago and ended up trying to charge me for 4 songs that she used to talk about her life, her dad and her mother’s cancer, all while wearing clothes. I know cancer is fuckin’ sexy, but only while I have a set of tits in my hand. We were seated far back in the club and all the bitches looked hot from where we were….all you see is nakedness and seemingly nice ass. At the end of the night we hit up Pervert’s Row, and realized all the bitches we thought were hot, were the busted up old cars we knew they would turn out to be. Point of the story is the lookin at someone from far is always good, because you don’t dwell on their imperfections, cuz we’ve all got them, just look at Alyssa Milano’s arms…..they are fuckin’ hairy and as much as I love bush and imperfections, I know that someone on TV shouldn’t have any. Sort that shit out bitch.

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I went to the strippers again last night. That made for 2 nights in a row at the same bar. I saw a few of the same strippers including the bitch I called table scarps on Thursday. I found out her name is destiny, and I love the fact that she rocks a Roxy Bikini and not a trashy stripper outfit, but I don’t like the fact that she cant’s dance and has a dumpy ass. I also saw Drea the stripper who fucked me over in a lap dance by telling me that we’d make out in the booth 3 weeks ago and ended up trying to charge me for 4 songs that she used to talk about her life, her dad and her mother’s cancer, all while wearing clothes. I know cancer is fuckin’ sexy, but only while I have a set of tits in my hand. We were seated far back in the club and all the bitches looked hot from where we were….all you see is nakedness and seemingly nice ass. At the end of the night we hit up Pervert’s Row, and realized all the bitches we thought were hot, were the busted up old cars we knew they would turn out to be. Point of the story is the lookin at someone from far is always good, because you don’t dwell on their imperfections, cuz we’ve all got them, just look at Alyssa Milano’s arms…..they are fuckin’ hairy and as much as I love bush and imperfections, I know that someone on TV shouldn’t have any. Sort that shit out bitch.

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So here are some links to wrap up the day…it’s 4 minutes to minute and the highlight of my day was talking to my internet girlfriend in California. She doesn’t like me very much, but she looks good in a sombrero and that’s really all that matters for me…..I am listening to Styx, drinking beer, planning another trip to the strip club because it’s Friday and that’s just how I’m Livin’. If you hate these links…it is all my fault. Cuddles.

Nicole Richie has gone insane or has Joined a Band
Sex in Public is Hype, Sound Effects Aren’t
Lindsay Lohan in a Pink Bikini (is the New Blog)
LPSG.org Discuss if their Parents Know about their Large Penises
Lucy Becker has Stripper tits
For Every Hot Chick, There’s 10 Disgusting Ones…
DoubleViking Likes Bikini Models from Brazil
I fucking Love This Bitch Hannah via Fleshbot
ThongSeeker Seeks Bitches in thongs
Courtney Love can still afford to shop
(she sold Cobain’s songs and made a killing…haha…get it)

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So here are some links to wrap up the day…it’s 4 minutes to minute and the highlight of my day was talking to my internet girlfriend in California. She doesn’t like me very much, but she looks good in a sombrero and that’s really all that matters for me…..I am listening to Styx, drinking beer, planning another trip to the strip club because it’s Friday and that’s just how I’m Livin’. If you hate these links…it is all my fault. Cuddles.

Nicole Richie has gone insane or has Joined a Band
Sex in Public is Hype, Sound Effects Aren’t
Lindsay Lohan in a Pink Bikini (is the New Blog)
LPSG.org Discuss if their Parents Know about their Large Penises
Lucy Becker has Stripper tits
For Every Hot Chick, There’s 10 Disgusting Ones…
DoubleViking Likes Bikini Models from Brazil
I fucking Love This Bitch Hannah via Fleshbot
ThongSeeker Seeks Bitches in thongs
Courtney Love can still afford to shop
(she sold Cobain’s songs and made a killing…haha…get it)

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The funny thing about poverty is that we get the shit end of everything. We are blamed for all the problems in society and people think we send our kids to school without lunches and shit because we are too busy being poor, you know working 2 jobs and trying to make ends meet, or sitting in an alley smokin’ crack and turning tricks. Eitherway, rich people are way more fucked up. They hire poor people to raise their kids, while they do things that rich people do like work and shop and go to society events. When the kid becomes a headache they send the motherfucker off to boarding school because they really can’t be bothered. The kids become more fucked up, but since they aren’t poor, they don’t get arrested, they get University degrees, develop a drug addiction and it’s all cool cuz they have enough money to get themselves out of the mess with special schools and shit. Point of the story is that Melanie Griffith has a rockin’ a biker Antonio tattoo that she got at a flea market. She’s no 1976 Playboy Model She Once Was (click this link)

Bonus:
Actress Melanie Griffith and her daughter Dakota Johnson enjoy a smoke outside of Dakota’s school (for troubled kids)

Another Bonus: Matthew Perry at an AA Meeting at the Same Place

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The funny thing about poverty is that we get the shit end of everything. We are blamed for all the problems in society and people think we send our kids to school without lunches and shit because we are too busy being poor, you know working 2 jobs and trying to make ends meet, or sitting in an alley smokin’ crack and turning tricks. Eitherway, rich people are way more fucked up. They hire poor people to raise their kids, while they do things that rich people do like work and shop and go to society events. When the kid becomes a headache they send the motherfucker off to boarding school because they really can’t be bothered. The kids become more fucked up, but since they aren’t poor, they don’t get arrested, they get University degrees, develop a drug addiction and it’s all cool cuz they have enough money to get themselves out of the mess with special schools and shit. Point of the story is that Melanie Griffith has a rockin’ a biker Antonio tattoo that she got at a flea market. She’s no 1976 Playboy Model She Once Was (click this link)

Bonus:
Actress Melanie Griffith and her daughter Dakota Johnson enjoy a smoke outside of Dakota’s school (for troubled kids)

Another Bonus: Matthew Perry at an AA Meeting at the Same Place

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