How about a little bikini contest… Natalie Imbruglia is not lying naked on the floor…she’s 41 years old and has been fucked by David Schwimmer, which is terrifying, but he’s rich…I don’t remember ever fantasizing about her laying naked on the floor song, but at 41…she’s looking pretty fucking awesome, probably because she moved to […]
- SFW
- NSFW(18+)
Search Results
2016
14
Mar
Girls at the Teen Choice Awards of the Day
Teen Choice Awards is a fucking scam…a scam we call publicists run….a scam that my pervert ass once watched only to see that Ashley Tisdale won “hottest girl of the year”…it was many years ago…pre nose job, where Ashley Tisdale wasn’t even the hottest girl in the grocery store, everytime she went to the fucking […]
2016
29
Feb
The 88th Academy Awards of the Day
I still think MY OSCARS SO WHITE SHOOT was more interesting than the Oscars… BUT…It was the Oscars and I accidentally watched part of it, don’t blame me, we all have our weaknesses, and mine is in the form of a girl who wants me to cum on her natural tits, before she gets fake […]
2016
11
Feb
stepLINKS of the Day
I like to give girls bad relationship advice, because apparently, I am that shoulder to cry on for people everywhere, so I like to give the I think when things are done they are done – but don’t listen to me – I may just want to get in your pants…level of doubt… “Is he […]
2016
28
Jan
stepLINKS of the Day
I told a girl “I bet you have a cute asshole”…and she went fucking nuts, and not in a good way. So I asked “would you rather I say I bet you have a shitty, disgusting, meaty asshole”… To which she said “talking about someone’s asshole is weird, especailly when they are your fucking waitress”… […]
2016
27
Jan
stepLINKS of the Day
For as long as I can remember, I’m talking since I was 12 or 13, I’ve asked girls if they masturbate, if they have bush, how they masturbate and what they masturbate to… Once things get lubricated and warmed up and our friendship is trustworthy, I ask what the weirdest thing they’ve masturbated to…the thing […]
2016
27
Jan
Chloe Grace Moretz Goes Black and May One Day Go Back…TBD…of the Day
Chloe Grace Moretz is fucking Chance the Rapper. They went to a Miguel concert, so ethnic, and apparently that means the 18 year old is taking a big black dick, and who the fuck cares, we’re in a Black Lives Matter era where people shit on White Privilege, meaning if she were to not fuck […]
2016
20
Jan
stepLINKS of the Day
Sometimes I am too drunk on tacos to even think about pussy…unless the pussy is the taco I am drunk on…then I can’t even think of tacos to eat because I am busy wondering how badly this is going to end up for me – will it be mouth sores, will it be lawsuits, will […]
2015
29
Oct
stepLINKS of the Day
Today…a homeless person asked me if he could move in with me…and at first I as thrown off and though how disgusting that would smell…despite living with a morbidly obese woman…who already fucking smells like shit…and then I thought about how a drug addicted crazy person would probably be really annoying to hang out with […]
2015
28
Sep
stepLINKS of the Day
The worst thing about having a small dick….is when a girl says “put your little dick in my mouth”…. Not that “put your big dick in my mouth” would have been better, because I would know they’d be lying… But “put your little dick in my mouth”….is almost as bad…because we don’t need reminders of […]