DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2022

17

Feb

Asshole Behind Thong Thursday of the Day

Thongs, the pussy drip pan panty, because those fucking things are covering much asshole drip….is the MOST inclusive panty around because it allows assholes to wink at each. other in this genderless world…knowing it’s the orifice that unites us in this divided world….I write the same thing about thongs and the asshole behind the thongs every week…WELCOME…it’s been a year or more….nothing left to said…which I guess applies to every post I do…so let’s make a thong joke…

So….a man in a thong, a woman in a thong walk into a bar….after showing their vaccine passport…since social distancing prevents them from shaking hands…masks prevent them from smiling at each other…except with their eyes….they had no choice but to bend over, pull down their pants and show their asshole behind thong..because they are in it together…and need to let each other know..

That joke was terrible…no wonder Jay Leno didn’t hire me as a writer…not that I applied…but it’s the internet…if there was talent here…there would be EMAILS….

The only talent here…is the ASSHOLES….gateway to the fucking soul…window to a shit dick…when the pussy is out of service….FUN.

(more…)

Posted in:Asshole Behind Thong

2022

17

Feb

Addison Rae Slutty Angel of the Day

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Addison Rae’s some chubby TikTok girl who makes more money than some small countries around the world, because the world is fucking weird and disconnected from rewarding QUALITY, they’ll just throw money at anything….as long as it has views and apparently this one has the views thanks to doing awkward fucking dancing….

To be in a society that makes people 100s of millions of dollars for awkward dancing, is. weird place to be…I guess the good news is that she’s dressed up like some Ballerina, you know doing “DANCER FACE” like Black Face…dressed like a dancer because she’s the HIGHEST PAID DANCER IN THE WORLD……

I like to think this is a shit on all the actually trained ballerinas, I’m thinking communist Russian dissenting Ballerinas, who at a young age were sent to work cams to train for ballet, only to eventually escape from Russian and make it in America before dying of AIDS because ballet’s pretty gay…especially in the 80s…but you have to laugh that all these trained dancers make dog shit money and some troll comes through with her Kardashian support and makes a mockery of their art…and the WORLD eats it all up…HILARIOUS….cheap women making easy money with cheap content…what a world….

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Posted in:Addison Rae

2022

17

Feb

Titty Drop Thursday of the Day

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Titty Drops…the fun way to show strangers your tits….

I don’t know when standard Titty Flashes became so theatric, like a choreographed dance, or the flight of the butterfly, but the titty version…when really all you gotta do is pull your tits out…

Maybe it’s the dramatics of it all, the whole JOURNEY not DESTINATION, that is a slow and exciting reveal…as you sit eagerly on the edge of your chair for those 10-20 seconds as you wait for them to drop…but the truth is I don’t care if there’s a song or a dance to see the tits, I’ve spend days if not months maybe even years in strip clubs and you usually have to wait for at least half a song to see the tits…so let them have their artistry, their game, their performance…their tease…their coy behavior….and we can have the titties.

(more…)

Posted in:Titty Drop

2022

17

Feb

Isla Fisher Cleavage of the Day

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I don’t know if I’ve changed…in terms of my pervert sense of humor…or just my level of “AWAKENESS”…knowing that all this shit is a fucking scam used to brainwash the masses and herd them into whatever direction they want…which I feel like I’ve always known, you know demonic opportunistic money grubbing evil, godless fucks…or maybe Sacha Baron Cohen changed…

Because I remember when we’d pass around Ali G clips in the early 2000s and thought it was a brilliant troll because people fell for it….I even thought Borat the first time around…despite being racist was funny….but probably because there was no one else doing it….I don’t know….I don’t even remember the movie, I just started hating it soon after because every asshole would quote his racist bullshit everywhere they went…

Then I saw his most recent one and I just saw him as some industry sweetheart, weak comedy, sold his soul to the industry, pushing woke agendas, attacking and alienating 50 percent of the population for his little club of dick suckers, including this bitch with her tits out…all old and mom-like under the Sacha Baron Cohen spell of demonic nonsense presented as “comedy”…or whatever the fuck it is….

What I am saying is I hate Sacha Baron Cohen and the dried up holes he ejaculates in by association..

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Posted in:Isla Fisher

2022

17

Feb

Tanline Thursday of the Day

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Tanlines put me in a tropical state of mind…because I know that laying in the sun and absorbing it’s energy like most animals do is part of what we need to be doing…and the whole skin cancer racket is a lie…and billion dollar business just trying to get in the way of your connection with the fucking earth…so TANLINES are a reminder of the SUN that BROKE through the PROPAGANDA and lies…and in the process highlights all the good bits of a bitch that would otherwise NOT stand out because it’d all be the same fucking shade…and we’d never know how LUCKY we were seeing what is clothed in public….because the internet is private and intimate…right….

It’s actually pretty funny that these nude models post their nudes for the internet, like a great game….totally separate to real life…when being naked at the GROCERY store would have FAR less touch points or AUDIENCE members…but is just too real, too personal…while this internet life is just fake as fuck…

(more…)

Posted in:Tanlines

2022

17

Feb

Tik Tok Bear Dance and Other News of the Day

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Jumping Jacks

No Bra Challenge

Shredded

Pizza or Tacos

TikTok Bra Less Dance

Snake Attack

Recycling and Toxic Masculinity…THE EviL Is Everywhere….

Airplanes are Political…

Cowboys are fucking heroes….

Posted in:Uncategorized

2022

17

Feb

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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You may not know this, but I never visit this website, I only update it from the backend and really have no idea what it actually looks like….but for some reason I accidentally landed on the homepage….and it made me laugh out loud in amazement…

It’s nostalgic, vintage, ridiculous….and there is no site on the intrenet like it….and there’s definitely a reason for that…it is so weird, useless, idiotic that it’s existence alone is hysterical….far funnier than any inappropriate joke, or mean spirited celebrity dis I could ever write.

This site is the old fat amateur couple who live in the basement and film disgusting fuck videos from the late 90s..the website version…but probably less lucrative and rewarding….because at least that old couple got jerked off to….and you don’t jerk off to me…I feel so alone

Euphoria Gets Renewed to Keep the Darkness Going
CLICK HERE

Cheyenee Deprem Hot Model…
CLICK HERE

Sean McVay’s Fiancee Shuts Down Retirement Rumors
CLICK HERE

Taylor Swift Shaking her Booty On Stage
CLICK HERE

Guinness Record for Most Muscle Ups
CLICK HERE

Rich Chinese Guy Gets Rejected – Throws a Fit
CLICK HERE

Attacked by a Tiger Fish
CLICK HERE

Nana Got her Macbook
CLICK HERE

Cam Girls Are Hot….
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS

2022

16

Feb

stepLINKS of the Day

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That Pam and Tommy show, or what I like to call DICK ON DISNEY APP, because it’s on the DISNEY APP in Canada…got a lot of steam, not as much as Inventing Anna, but enough to make you wonder when Disney will produce the Montana Fishbourne sex tape origin story…THE PEOPLE ARE EAGER….

That said, I went outside today and say guys wearing masks…and by guys I mean people who I am sure identify as men….

If guys are wearing masks, on the street, not in store, because in store it could be because they are being polite…but if guys are wearing masks while walking on the street it is strictly because they are cucks….

They are doing it to keep the peace at home or they are doing it because they watch their wives get fucked by big cocks while they jack off..

No man would ever wear a mask at his own volition, unless it was to be respectful in a store….it is against being a man to wear a mask and if you are a mask wearing…you are a cunt, or have a cunt or behave like you do…

Yes, being “butch” or “macho” and all those other words that have become bad words….is what being an actual man is about…it’s called testosterone…

You may not realize that…but real men do….

Stop being a beta cuck bitch with a gaping asshole because that’s where you find fulfillment…LARGE OBJECTS in your man uterus….your man WOMB…where both your shit and pleasure center lives…

Oh and remmeber….girls are actually into real men…they are WIRED that way…so being an apologetic fucking pussy about it to cater to the woke mob is a turn off…which is why they all eat pussy now…instead of SUCKING ON YOUR DICK.

Man up and I’m hardly a man activist, those guys are fucking queers…I’m probably hormonally a 75 year old woman…but all this weak, clammy, masked dude on the street shit embarrasses me on behalf of men everywhere..

Fucking pussies…even though it is your man pussy you want fucked.

Here are some stepLINKS…

Adriana Lima is Back in this Photoshoot
CLICK HERE

Olivia Culpo – Still Dating – Still Hot in Bikini
CLICK HERE

Demi Rose Gets Romantic
CLICK HERE

Madison Beer’s Tube Top
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Britney Spears in a Bikini
CLICK HERE

The Hottest Goalie Ever…in a Bikini
CLICK HERE

Bella and Gigi Hadid Naked Adam and Eve Siblings…..
CLICK HERE

Otters in Bonnets
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Elsa Hosk Turns Up the Heat
CLICK HERE

Only Fans Model Hanging with Antonio Brown
CLICK HERE

Kate Hudson’s Son is Dating an Apatow
CLICK HERE

Optical Illusion Boob Shirt
CLICK HERE

Japanese Snow Drift
CLICK HERE

Jackass Movie Review
CLICK HERE

Renee Gracie in a Bikini
CLICK HERE

10 Items You’re Too Old to Wear
CLICK HERE

He Hit the Jackpot
CLICK HERE

HUMP DAY!
CLICK HERE

Aaron Rodgets and Shailene have Split
CLICK HERE

Bob Saget’s Family Think he may have been Murdered – Who Killed Bob Saget
CLICK HERE

Unusual Natural Phenomena
CLICK HERE

Lambo in the Snow
CLICK HERE

Replacing Kate Winslet in Titanic with a Cat
CLICK HERE

Tom Brady has Advice for Stafford
CLICK HERE

Redlight District Model
CLICK HERE

How Edible Props are Made for Movies
CLICK HERE

Cowboy Statue Prank!
CLICK HERE

Cam Sluts Bring the Pussy and It’s always a Good Time!
CLICK HERE

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From the Forum

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Dove Cameron in a Bra TOp
CLICK HERE

Adriana Lima’s Official Magazine Shoot
CLICK HERE

Scar/Jo in a Photoshoot
CLICK HERE

Olivia Culpo Legs
CLICK HERE

Blake Lively in a Bra Top
CLICK HERE

Addison Rae in a Slutty Dress
CLICK HERE

Mary Elizabeth Windstead in a Bra
CLICK HERE

Cami Mendes at Fashion Week
CLICK HERE

Lindsey VOnn for Gucci
CLICK HERE

Maline Akerman in a Hippie Dress
CLICK HERE

Nudes in the Movies
CLICK HERE

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From stepSMUT!!

(LINKS BELOW ARE NSFW!)
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We Call it Ground Hogging
CLICK HERE

24 People Having a Shitty Day
CLICK HERE

Naked in the Shower
CLICK HERE

Dildo Riding
CLICK HERE

Athltes Having a Shitty Day
CLICK HERE

Fucking the Wall
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19 People Having a Shitty Day
CLICK HERE

Showing off the Tattoos
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Big Tit Bavarian Strip
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Hot Girl on a Colorful Dildo
CLICK HERE

Some Slutty Model Named Natalya Krasavina in a Slutty Shoot
CLICK HERE

Raindrops Falling On Our Head
CLICK HERE

Big Titty Drop
CLICK HERE

Throatfuck
CLICK HERE

Twins or Mirror Challenge
CLICK HERE

What Prostitution Looks Like
CLICK HERE

Being a Drunk Does the Same THing to Me
CLICK HERE

Hot Reddit Amateur
CLICK HERE

Mom of the Gear
CLICK HERE

Latex Gloves Fetish
CLICK HERE

Asian Cutie
CLICK HERE

Roses are Red – Pee is Yellow – Open the Doors – See all the Pee Holes
CLICK HERE

Amateur FUcker
CLICK HERE

Managing the Pandemic
CLICK HERE

Cute Girl Worst Fetish
CLICK HERE

Shauna Sand Wants her Shoes BAck
CLICK HERE

Maria on the Dildo
CLICK HERE

Fishnets for the Dildo Show
CLICK HERE

Homegrown Hotties
CLICK HERE

Butt Plug Wetness
CLICK HERE

Striped Socks Girl
CLICK HERE

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

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Posted in:stepLINKS

2022

16

Feb

Bella Thorne Shooting Pics of her Sister and Some Dicks of the Day

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I’ve heard some fucking weird porn stories over the years, from sisters being thrown into porn on the youngest one’s 18th birthday, they were actually really nice girls, we did a photoshoot together, you know since I am a published model…check my instagram…I don’t log into…

But yeah, seeing sisters getting fucked together, always weird, but not as weird as older siblings or uncles, or dads filming their daughter’s or stepdaughter’s porn…the sibling thing is more accessible incest…and when they are half sisters what’s the big deal…not to mention…being pro sex, being a weird pervert, being the gateway between porn and mainstream…like Bella Thorne…loving that direct to consumer nude content money because porn makes money, just not for me…is what it’s about….

So here’s Bella Thorne, content producer, shooting her sister’s OnlyFans content, a little BTS…with a couple of dicks that you can only assume end up inside her, or in one of those pies…because porn is mainstream…and mainstream is porn in a Godless society of heathens crying for attnetion, easy money, and GOOD times…

There is a fetish here, the younger sister filming the older sister’s porn…when the younger sister is a famous disney kid…it’s pretty niche and specific…but it’s there….big pussy lips for all!

Posted in:Bella Throne

2022

16

Feb

Miranda Kerr Bikini of the Day

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Miranda Kerr the sugar baby who gets it…because she approaches life with the simple attitude of “I was in Victoria’s Secret, Millionaires are So Boring, Weak and not actual winners, therefore I deserve the best and thus only date billionaires”….

She did her bottom feeding, probably literally, since actors are weird with Orlando Bloom when she was at her hottest….

An Australian billionaire I once knew told me how she cheated on Bloom with Bieber after a Victoria’s Secret fashion show before that story actually got leaked…it was my first and only EXCLUSIVE….and NO ONE fucking cared…because I am not a serious person, this is not a news site, I just shit post all day….

Then she ended up with a billionaire with a cool fucking yacht, which I guess didn’t work out because there was some billionaire drama there…that may have involved Mariah Carey…so she went for the younger, fresher billionaire who created SNAPCHAT….YOU KNOW because that NERD understood the power of
I only date billionaires…and now that NERD can show you all the amazing things that money can buy when you produce a cultural relevant sexting app that probably saved every nude ever sent and pretended it vanished…a scam, probably, but that’s the whole tech hustle…..and by all the amazing things I mean a still skinny VS model we’ve all forgotten about because she was being BRED for guaranteed child support payments…she’s a pro.

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Posted in:Miranda Kerr