Candice Swanepoel could be covered in feces at her South African farm and I’d still want to lick her clean…so seeing her half naked for Victoria’s Secret may be boring as fuck…the same as all the other catalog pics….but still a half naked Candice Swanepoel photoshopped into a creature lovlier than she probably already is….

I can’t say I’m into this, or that I have a raging boner like I do when girls tell me they want to lick my ass while sucking my dick as another girl sits on my face, but I can say that I won’t cheapen my love for Candice like that….and I’ll deal with my soft penis and focus on the romantic love I have for her pictures instead…

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Anyone who says Candice Swanepoel has a shitty face is clearly not looking at what is important….her ass.

Maybe I am bias since she’s my gf who doesn’t know it yet….but I think she’s perfect…even in these boring fucking pics from Victoria’s Secret….

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While I was pouring, or more accuratley poor-ing, my heart out to Candice Swanepeol yesterday via love letters I wrote in the form of posts celebrating her body and our undying love….she was being man handled by some Victoria’s Secret photographer, who probably doesn’t bang her, but has seen her naked and has a weird relationship with her…but who more importantly should have been me….I would be broken up by this, but my obsessiveness, is really lazy and I’m over it, but I do still think we are connected at the soul for the sake of doing posts on her….even though she’s gone and done this to me….all because she just doesn’t know our love exists yet….and to be honest I can’t blame her, and not just cuz I love her and thus am leniant about her actions, because before she came along into my life in pictures, I never knew a love like this before.

She’s just playing hard to get and trying to get me jealous, that’s gotta be it….

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Candice Swanepoel is a bikini model…..who I want to have a destination wedding with…even if she’s not into that kind of thing…you know cuz she travels so much and just wants to spend it quietly at home….I wake up in her arms or her in my arms, although I am probably the more needy one…where we can gaze into each other’s eyes and sing each other love songs every morning for the rest of our lives…this love is eternal…it is til the end of time…why must she cheat on me by getting naked for all of you….I’ll have to have a stern talk with her about this….just as soon as she acknowledges I exist.

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I love Candice Swanepoel…clothed our unclothed….despite ignoring all my advances and love letter on Instagram…because I assume she’s not a romantic…or just playing hard to get….but deep down she knows we are connected at the soul…I mean there is just so much passion on my end, that she’s gotta be feeling some of this…said the inner stalker in me….but truth be told, I’m lazy as fuck, uninterested as fuck, and have never been hung up on a girl…I just like looking at this bitch…she’s easy on the eyes…..

I figure if I keep on repeating myself when it comes to loving her…maybe it will reach her telepathically….

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Candice Swanepoel is a fucking dream….people give me shit because of her face…they say she’s busted up and broken down…but I just don’t see it….maybe I am blinded by love like that hot implant 25 year old I saw riding with an old fat dude in a Ferrari yesterday, you know cuz her body is a fucking wonderland……or maybe this is my type…..the idea woman…where even her imperfections are perfect….or maybe Candice Swanepoel and I are just connected at the soul and her rockin’ ass pulls the strings of my heart like some kind of puppet master who makes me want to dance…and by dance I mean masturbate to a bitch in a bikini like I was 12 and there was no internet, just good old wholesome jerking off to non porn….finding erotic in everything…like ass dimples I’d want to fill with my seed like it was BOTOX…..

She’s the best.

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You know this picture isn’t all that hot…and I don’t even know if the model in the picture is Candice Swanepoel cuz I have facial recognition blindness…I just know she put it up on her instagram a few hours ago…and that I wouldn’t mind being the owner of the car she in next to so that I can pop open the trunk and throw her in it…driving her far away to a place no one will bother us….where we can plan our wedding and life of love together before the police helicopters find us and shoot me for kidnapping her…..you know a real romantic love story…cuz she’s my fucking favorite.

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