My first internet business was a long fucking time ago, probably in 1999 – when I met a girl who had read somewhere that she could sell her panties online for something like 100 bucks a pair back when eBay was less uptight about shit – when the internet was a free and magical place of anonymity and perverts – before it became one massive reality show – featuring everyone and their mother self promoting, gossiping, and fucking judging each other’s shitty fucking lives…while producing content that attempts to give the asshole substance and meaning – when it’s all just a giant high school level of garbage…

Well…we figured if we found cheap panties, like 3 dollar a pair and we just used some glue stick and tuna juice on them, we could sell a bunch of pairs a day – and make a great profit…the only issue was she was 300 pounds and we couldn’t find someone who was semi hot to pose in daily panty photos…but I guess it was pretty enterprising of me and representative of my capabilities as a failure…who went onto be a blogger like fucking teen girl…instead of a dot com billionaire like so many idiots I’ve come across since 1999…

That said, Alessandra Ambrosio is a VS model who is old, tired, boring, but has new fake tits that she likes to show off in her latter years….still under contract, making me assume her ALES collection of bathing suits isn’t competitive to her masters who own her, but rather just a brand they own and give her royalties on – she’s given them enough of her life…

So when I say she’s selling bikinis, it’s not like pornstars selling their outfits from shoots, it’s actually just made in china shit that Donald Trump wants to end – if you’re lucky the only bodily fluid on it – is asian child labor blood…or tears…not Brazzilian model pussy juice….

This is the shoot in some fancy place….because this is what she does…it doesn’t even look like her…

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Alessandra Ambrosio is another one of those overrated promo models who sell underwear or used to sell underwear for the billion dollar brand…that paid them well after importing them to America to live the American dream….but she’s old now…and a mom…but I guess that doesn’t stop her from showing off her new tits…semi topless for GQ Brazil…and I’m not hating anything going on here…but I will remind everyone involved that there are 1000s of hotter 21 year olds…so that we can leave the 35 year olds back home by the pool in their LA mansions…to raise their kids with their nannies…there is no need to continue encouraging them to get naked…even if they look good enough naked..they are still moms and this can’t be a good influence on other moms, or husbands.. because I know moms, I see them at the coffee shops having baby play dates…and they don’t look anything like this…so why depress anyone old enough to give a fuck about Alessandra Ambrosio with the whole “I have a multi-million dollar contract so I work out all day, when other moms actually do mom things because they aren’t underwear brand promo models”….

I just think we should retire these bitches at 27…why is the legacy of these people so much longer than it used to be…I blame social media…for not letting nature takes it’s course and let people forget them…it’s just relentless…but topless…but nippleless…we need more…not less…I mean less of her…but if you’re gonna put her out there in her last few “races”….make her fucking deliver…

I don’t know why I bother writing this nonsense…

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I guess Alessandra Ambrosio is putting her new fake tits to use…dressed as Jessica Rabbit…something that would probably make you Roger Rabbit fetishists come yourself…

Part of me loves seeing hot models in costumes showing off their bodies….even when they are old, even after having a kid…because models…bounce back from childbirth, their lives and bank accounts rely on it….unlike lying housewives from all walks of life who don’t bounce back from the hell that is child birth….

Now that doesn’t mean her vagina is well contained…but we can’t tell from these shitty pics….but it’s Halloween…so yay…I guess…whatever…just go outside and see all the slutty pussy being slutty pussy…as slutty pussy tends to be…

TO SEE MORE CELEBS DRESSED UP CLICK HERE

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If you’re really into seeing old, wasted up, Victoria’s Secret models on the beach taking selfies, because they realize that they need social media to survive…

Her hashtag is “foreverOnVacation”….which in and of itself is fucking obnoxious, bragging about how great she is and how she beat the system, all for being “hot” according to Victoria’s Secret and the lazy american audience who shop there and believe their hype…

When really she should look into her vapid self and think “What could I do with all this money I made being a fucking half naked whore, exploiting myself for a brand that exploits women and sets unrealistic ideals”…you know a little “I am fucking garbage, and have no soul, but I cashed out”…I guess those are too long for hashtags…and ForeverOnVacation has more of a fun ring to it….

Even though her vacation life is her taking selfies like a desperate 20 year old, trying to grow her social reach so that when she does quit the VS life, she’ll have a big base to sell product to.

She’s an opportunist, using you…and her bikini pics aren’t even good…so fuck this shit..the most uninspiring, flimsy content ever…garbage.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

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Alessandra Ambrosio is promoting bullshit, because she’s a promo model and a huge part of being a promo model is promoting bullshit…it’s what they do…because people like me pick up on the promo model photoshoot like it matters, when it doesn’t matter, to showcase to the world how hot, or amazing, or tight bodied she is for a mom….in what they would deem a celebration, that feeds her ego…that makes her feel like she matters…before realizing that beauty fades, and that pile of money she’s become used to isn’t enough of a reminder that she was once the hottest, forcing her to navigate and figure out ways to maintain that beauty, image, hype….but she’ll lose..it’s nature…it’s how it works and it’s amazing she’s lasted this long…because I never thought she was all that hot…and I am the unofficial Hollywood judge of hotness…I’ve made a very pathetic career out of it…so jokes on them…I am posting it not because I think it matters…but because I think it DOESN’t matter….take that Alessandra Ambrosio and the people who paid you a million dollars for these pics…

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If you want to smell like piss….but the Alessandra Ambrosio branded perfume that she doesn’t wear but that she attaches her name to because I guess people on the international level think she’s some fashion icon, despite being a promo model for a panty company who gets half naked, because people are morons and buy into anything they see on TV or the internet….

Seriously, if you want to go to you local Walgreens and see the different celebrity scents that they have huge licensing deals on….you’ll see just how fucking vile the product being sold is. You’ll know there is no fucking way this bitch touches this toxic shit….

I am posting it – not to say how garbage celebrity endorsements for celebrity brands is…but because back in June Alessandra Ambrosio filmed this commercial on the beach in Malibu, where the highlight of the video was edited out, her panty flashes…..the only thing she’s done of value in a long time….and they didn’t even feature it. Just more proof all these fuckers have it all wrong…

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Alessandra Ambrosio is shaking her ass for her white girl fans…or maybe for all the dudes who Victoria’s Secret panders to…

I would say that hip hop, is pop music and that every single white girl in the world knows how to shake her ass like some kind of african princess, and I would be right in saying that…but Alessandra Ambrosio isn’t necessarily white, plus she’s not a girl, she’s an old as fuck Brazilian which could be white, but could also be native or afro or whatever, and she too likes to shake her ass..

She’s doing it like a white college girl at a frat party…because this isn’t a black thing anymore…that’s racist…but wearing an indian headdress is cultural appropriation, or having a school cafeteria serve egg rolls, or Indian food is cultural appropriation to all these white college aged social justice warriors…but shaking their ass all tribal and ready to fuck…is just doing like the music videos and that’s ok…because social justice warriors are full of shit…and because shaking ass is always ok…even when you’re in your 30s and a mom…but only if you’re a Victoria’s Secret model who’s skin isn’t hanging off her like a ravaged mom I’m sure you’ve all seen and had to fuck…because we are men…and we fuck what we have to…especially when we marry them.

I am drunk. She knows her angles. It looks good.

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Alessandra Ambrosio tit hanging out while her ass is hanging out of a dress … for the paparazzi while shopping is what one could call great fashion sense, or maybe someone would think it was an older mom trying to reaffirm the world that she’s got what it takes, and not just implants but an ass too…and that just because she’s had a couple kids with rich guys…and just because younger girls are way hotter than her…doesn’t mean she’s not a contender…..or maybe when the world has seen you naked, you stop bothering trying to cover up, it’s like when you fuck a girl with your little dick, eventually you’re good with her seeing the little dick, cuz she’s seen it before…fascinating..

TO SEE the Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

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Skinny – mid 30s – mom – Brazilian – Alessandra Ambrosio is on some yacht in a bikini with a bunch of other models, because this is what models do when they aren’t getting paid too much money to stand around in a bikinis or half naked or whatever it is they do.

It’s nice to see these women pool their money together to have a fun girl’s vacation – I mean if you can afford it, why not take advantage!

Right? I mean there is no way that they are guests of some Billionaire….because they are power women and can pay their own damn bills…

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