There’s something I really hate about girls who skateboard….and that I have always hated about girls who skateboard….and that is that they look like idiots and usually aren’t as dainty or as lady like as I like my girls to be…but I guess that was an era before the long board made a comeback…cuz seeing Candice Swanepoel, my favorite, rocking her long athletic model legs, squatting like she was on my dick…but instead on a longboard…. all beachy and 70s erotic…and not tom boy trying to pop shove it….and I like it….but then again…I like all Candice Swanepoel has to offer…from her period…to shitting…to anything disgusting she can do..it’s all fucking gold to me…

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Candice Swanepoel is venturing out from Victoria’s Secret, you know making big moves….cuz she’s a huge name, has a perfect body, and because all these companies are the fucking same bullshit, with the same shoots and probably even the same ownership….and she’s mastered the catalog campaigns…..

I like her, I get hate mail about her, people don’t seem down with white Africans making more money than they do, I guess they are still stuck in the slave era I guess, when I just wish I was stuck ball deep inside her…

Here she is the other day in a black dress….

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Nice and greased up and in her bathing suit for her instagram, reminding me of an erotic jelly wrestling match I once had with a fat chick, only she’s not fat at all, she’s a tiny, fit, amazing little package, who might be more of an Aids cocktail than a hotel bar cocktail kind of girl…you know the kind of girl who is shiny thanks to topical ointment for her AIDS lesions like she was Tom Hanks in that AIDS movie….thanks to getting tattoos or her ears pierced or sharing a drink or fucked by her farm’s field workers when she was 14 and rebelling….but none of that matters, with the medical advances in AIDS, you can live forever with the shit, and guilting a girl who looks like this for the rest of your life, wouldn’t be such a bad deal….not that any of us are fucking her…but you get what I am saying and if you don’t…it is that she’s lovely.

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Victoria’s Secret made a couple of billion dollars in sales last year….and I expect more out of their catalog shoots…even if they made them more like a hip hop video with helicopters and fucking Rolls Royces in the background….maybe a few hip hop video girls twerking…I mean anything but this standard, constant, catalog shoot that I jerked off to in the fucking late 80s, with a different babe I want to impregnate as the star….

I guess it is just uninspired and I like things to be a little more revolutionary….

This why change a good thing shit is shit.

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Candice Swanepoel was my favorite Victoria’s Secret model for the last little while…I’d write her love letters as I anxiously awaited her boyfriend of 5 years to come out of the closet so that I could make my move ….but then one day someone commented under one of my posts…calling her out for having a shitty face….and I started looking at her differently…I was blinded by her hott body…and I was not aware of the fact that she wasn’t as amazing as I thought she was….and ever since that day…I’ve only been able to jerk off to pics of her from behind…you know with her head cropped out…cuz I’m romantic like that….not that I jerk off to pics of lingerie models….this isn’t the 90s and I have the internet….but if I did…it’d be focused and zoomed in on her great fucking ass…

Here she is promoting sports and fitness apparel with her great ass….apparel all girls should wear to the gym to motivate dudes to go to the gym…..even though all girls I see at the gym are fat and trying to look like this…..the world is one flawed system after another.

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Candice Swanepoel could be covered in feces at her South African farm and I’d still want to lick her clean…so seeing her half naked for Victoria’s Secret may be boring as fuck…the same as all the other catalog pics….but still a half naked Candice Swanepoel photoshopped into a creature lovlier than she probably already is….

I can’t say I’m into this, or that I have a raging boner like I do when girls tell me they want to lick my ass while sucking my dick as another girl sits on my face, but I can say that I won’t cheapen my love for Candice like that….and I’ll deal with my soft penis and focus on the romantic love I have for her pictures instead…

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Anyone who says Candice Swanepoel has a shitty face is clearly not looking at what is important….her ass.

Maybe I am bias since she’s my gf who doesn’t know it yet….but I think she’s perfect…even in these boring fucking pics from Victoria’s Secret….

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While I was pouring, or more accuratley poor-ing, my heart out to Candice Swanepeol yesterday via love letters I wrote in the form of posts celebrating her body and our undying love….she was being man handled by some Victoria’s Secret photographer, who probably doesn’t bang her, but has seen her naked and has a weird relationship with her…but who more importantly should have been me….I would be broken up by this, but my obsessiveness, is really lazy and I’m over it, but I do still think we are connected at the soul for the sake of doing posts on her….even though she’s gone and done this to me….all because she just doesn’t know our love exists yet….and to be honest I can’t blame her, and not just cuz I love her and thus am leniant about her actions, because before she came along into my life in pictures, I never knew a love like this before.

She’s just playing hard to get and trying to get me jealous, that’s gotta be it….

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Candice Swanepoel is a bikini model…..who I want to have a destination wedding with…even if she’s not into that kind of thing…you know cuz she travels so much and just wants to spend it quietly at home….I wake up in her arms or her in my arms, although I am probably the more needy one…where we can gaze into each other’s eyes and sing each other love songs every morning for the rest of our lives…this love is eternal…it is til the end of time…why must she cheat on me by getting naked for all of you….I’ll have to have a stern talk with her about this….just as soon as she acknowledges I exist.

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