Courtney Stodden got her titties out and I figure that’s one of the greatest things a girl can do in this world…

In the event you don’t know, I think Courtney Stodden is fucking amazing. I think she represents a glorious time in our lives and despite having dragged by losers like Chrissy Teigen, who tried to drag me and I thought it was hilarious, and despite potentially dragging Courtney Stodden on this site over the years, I was invited to her LA Halloween Party years ago and I should have fucking gone, biggest regret, not that I would have met Stodden and recited my poetry to her, but I coulda snuch into her panty drawer…ASSUMING she wears panties…cuz she’s not right here…

Yes, I don’t like fake tits and Stodden was hot without any of the work she’s done…but because it’s Stodden, it’s ok…she’s wonderful…

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I like to think that I am the dog you see on the side of the street humping the dead dog that was just hit by a car also on the side of the street in a seize the fucking day…you necrophiliac fuck…opportunity knocks you take it….kind of motherfucker…

But there was a time I was invited to Courtney Stodden’s Halloween party….and I didn’t go to the fucking Halloween party and this was when she was still at her tabloid peak, probably before she was into the solo sex tapes and shit….and that was me not being the dog humping the dead dog on the side of the street in a seize the fucking day situation…and it’s not like I had ever been invited anywhere before that or after that and here I was spitting in the face of opportunity…

Not that going to a Halloween party is a big deal or it would amount to anything…it’s not like Stodden had anyone important at her party or that I’d even have seen her at her party…It’s not that I was hoping for romance with Stodden, but sneaking into her panty drawer could have been life changing…so that makes her ridiculous novelty boobs all the better…or I could have made T-Shirts saying “I went to Stodden’s Halloween Party and You Didn’t”….which would probably make no one around me jealous because about 1% of people know who Stodden is or that she exists…but I do…and here she is.

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In the event you were wondering, Courtney Stodden is amazing….I’ve been a fan since she broke through as tabloid fodder and I am still a fan all these years later….clown tits and all…because the fact is….if you’re going to get tits, get fucking tits, you know that’s how ALL fake tits should be….none of this trying to be sneaky and natural shit, I mean be that cartoon pinup model you WANT TO BE…

In the event you were wondering, my biggest life regret was not going to Courtney Stodden’s Halloween party many years ago…it was the one time I was invited anywhere and it would have been great to sing her love songs, read her poetry, make her art out of my semen on her bathroom mirror…you know never leave even when security tries to remove me…

What I am saying is that she’s a keeper…

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Courtney Stodden is sent from heaven…I mean…not really, but she’s been a lot of fun throughout her prolific career as the underage wife to one of the least famous actors in the history of acting, one of those actors you’re surprised doesn’t work at the grocery store doing deliveries or picking orders during the pandemic to pay their rent thanks to choosing a life of acting and committing so the people back home don’t realize you’re a failure..

If anything, her husband was the kind of actor that should make us all hop into acting, because clearly you get paid enough to get this bitch, even when you’re a fucking zero….

What I am trying to say is that I like Stodden, her move into weirdo sex tapes, now Only Fans, like who the fuck is paying for this shit….and not just from her but from all the creators on those platforms baiting people into buying shitty nudes…

Anyway, in this video, you can see her on the pole despite not being a stripper, in what I assume is more an exhibition of how her implants double as floatatation devices out of the water, like when you see a kid carrying 1000 helium balloons in the park floating….only the clown titty version…

I like it.

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I didn’t know that Courtney Stodden was doing an Only Fans type of program for her fans, because I assume she’s got some fans, at least enough for her to make it worth getting naked on the internet, but with clown tits like that, what the fuck else is she to do…not to mention she’s already had a series of shitty fucking sex tapes….might as well keep up the momentum in the ETSY of porn, you know the DO IT YOURSELF of porn, cut out the middle man and seduce these men directly with your ridiculous cosmetic surgery..

I know Courtney Stodden has always been bottom tier of celebrity, the celebrity she married when underage was bottom tier celebrity, so there was really no way but down…

I do appreciate her consistency, and I do like that she’s an Original Only Fans type girl, who had to get naked on camera before people were doing it themselves….a den mother old timer…

I also appreciate that she was the last of a dying breed of tabloid fodder women, you know the girls who snuck into the paparazzi stream of content despite not being famous, but just being where the paparazzi were and acting ridiculous….

I know they don’t have huge influencer level fan bases, if anything they are pretty sad, but Courtney Stodden still matters or at least her tits do, I mean she paid to make those things happen, they are horror movie quality tits, I’m waiting for them to explode and eat my soul or something….something ain’t right about them, but they sure are fucking perky, you could throw her in front of a freight train and they’d derail the fucking thing….brick wall titties…a super power no one should ever have…this is beyond chipping a tooth level of bolt on…this is so bolted on it looks like they were prepping for a Hurricane to hit….what the fuck am I looking at…

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Courtney Stodden may not be a magical angel sent from heaven, but she is pretty good and was entertaining enough for the tabloids for a decent amount of time before they spat her out and forgot she existed….the child bride to some obscure actor on Lost, who ended up doing low level sex tapes with VIVID back when VIVID existed and made low level celebrity sex tapes, like the Kim K sex tape….memories of getting a commission off each sex tape sold…the glory hole days of the internet as a not quite a pornographer, but definitely not mainstream!

Today, she brought her clown tits out in a bikini to show you all what Brian Austin Green potentially stuck his dick into as a rebound from Megan Fox, so Stodden’s not THAT low end, just pretty low end.

I still think my biggest regret was not going to her Halloween party I got invited to maybe 10 years ago because I don’t live in America and it was too complicated, but would have totally been worth taking out a loan to get into her house to sniff her panties in her panty drawer….but yeah…it was also the only celebrity event I’ve ever been invited to so maybe that’s why I felt it was a pivotal moment in my career as an internet pervert….

I don’t know what this Trump Mask shit is about, but it is definitely the best content going around on social media today….because even in an era of everyone being a clickbait for attention…the low levels who only exist for being clickbaits for attention can deliver…even if no one ends up seeing it because their fans aren’t that engaged in what they do…because they don’t have fans…but should since they were clickbaiters before instagram even existed…imagine that.

Whether this is TRUMP support or TRUMP mocking or not, it’s weirdly hot….

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Getting in the Fourth of July clickbait spirit by staging a bikini car wash now that she’s back in the tabloids for having sex with David from 90210 because his whore wife ran off with some pornstar fucking Machine Gun Kelly, which you’d expect a better play from Megan Fox, seeing as she’s Megan Fox, while on her recent quest to get off the Hollywood Blacklist she’s been on since Transformers….because if you speak out against Michael Bay and piss off Spielberg by association you get deleted….it’s not a guarantee that your career will be forever in Hollywood no matter what dick you suck…

I do know that Megan Fox has been fucking other dudes for the entire Brian Austin Green marriage, Alba is the same kind of vibe for her SIMP husband…their super groupies that knock them up and marry them are just happy to have them around or some shit that they can go off and do whatever slutty shit the need to do…only this time David from 90210 has taken a stand and publicly found some bottom feeder pussy.

That’s not to say Courtney Stodden is the worst sex doll looking person with clown tits you can fuck, but she’s definitely a different tier of celebrity, or low level celebrity…that hasn’t really made any real noise in years….even her sex tapes or porn clips were pretty shit….while she was already low on the celebrity ladder…

It’s like David from 90210 is just a fucking boomer who doesn’t realize he can fuck every hot under 25 girl trying to get OnlyFans Subscribers…going for this one seems weird and like I’ve always said, I like Courtney Stodden, I am a fan of what she does but for the irony of it….if you know what I mean….there’s hotter pussy for Megan Fox’s ex who was on 90201 ya know…we’re rooting for you David…ever since he had to make out with Tori Spelling on 90210, I felt bad for the guy….and still do.

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During the apocalypse QUARANTINE, Stodden has had time to do a series of half naked bikini sucking on a lollipop selfies for her fans who remember her as the 35 year old who played a child bride for the tabloids with the clown tits, that had at least one staged sex tape, like a sex worker, without really understanding their are better ways to loop loser dudes from the internet into giving you money every month….just ask that pig Maitland Ward, her pre porn career was LUCRATIVE with her patreon….you gotta build that base before you’re fucking big black cock in sex tapes…..

She’s a bottom feeder, but I still regret not going to her Halloween party MANY years ago, I should have robbed my neighbor for flight money. It would have been a legendary time, but now I am instead forced to post bikini pics of her in her TOTAL irrelevance, like she was irrelevant enough back then to have her dude invite me to a party at her house….she’s REAL fucking irrelevant now…but I’ll still look at her shamelessness with FOND memories of a better time when air travel was possible and the only thing you had to worry about was crashing..not COVID bullshit Bill Gates will save you all from.

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