Lohan is hanging with a gang of rejects in Paris, where she’s hitting up as many of the fashion shows as she can during Paris Fashion Week, hoping to really solidify her place in the fashion world, only apparently she got rejected access from some John Galliano show, because I guess the people at John Galliano don’t give a fuck about Lohan, but as long as she rocks these titty dresses, I do….unfortunately, Lohan’s not showing up at my door trying to get in, but if she keeps getting rejected at legit events, one day she may…you know when she’s desperate and made aware that I want to get her pregnant with my irrelevant dick.
Here are extra pics of Lohan in some tight outfit that I don’t want to bother doing a dedicated post on because I am lazy, they aren’t that interested, and I’d rather be napping in preperation of my night drinking….
I pretend to be in love with Ryan Seacrest on Twitter. I know you hate hearing about Twitter, well stop reading this fucking post then, because it’s really the only interaction I have with a motherfucker, other than when I jerk off to him on American Idol, or when listening to his radio show while sitting in traffic on the way to the fucking office, or some shit.
He wrote that he had a last minute two day trip in Paris, and I guess this unkown vagina is the reason why. Sure, I always thought Seacrest was gay and his whole “Seacrest Out” shit was his way of prepping to come out, like everytime he said it, the words “of the closet” were struggling to come out, but his professionalism just got the best of him.
Anyway, I profess my love to him, he never answers, it’s been ongoing, to the point where his producers and I are slowly building up a relationship and yesterday’s message to him was some of my best work in 130 characters or less.
do you love me too? Say yes.Knife is to wrist.Ready to end it all.Seek your approval.1st Twitter suicide.Some paula fan shit
He never answered. Cocksucker.
Either way, here he is with his emergency Paris meeting…who is probably his hairstylist, or best friend he talks about boys with, however, there is a chance he’s fucking her.
Jessica Alba went on a romantic bike ride in Paris, you know since it is the city of love, alone. I hear she followed this up with a bottle of wine, some harsh cigarettes, because she’s cliche and alone, because Cash Warren took advantage of the opportunity to get the fuck away from her and stay back home to watch the baby, you know the one she trapped him into suckin’ up his unhappiness and doin’ the right thing by taking her back after he was so close the the escape he could almost taste the groupie whore pussy spread and dripping for him…before getting roped back in.
Do you realize that the joke that is Paris Hilton has filmed a stupid video and recorded an offensively stupid song, mocking the US Government, pushing a fake presidential campaign, and it is a piece of shit and all your fucking fault.
If 10 years ago, you showed resistance to the people who were pushing her into our lives, and didn’t watch her sex tape, her TV show, jerk off to her retarded face in magazines, or care about who she was fucking, how she was wasting her money living the glamourous star fucking life she lived, she’d be quiet rich kid that would be too busy crying about how daddy wasn’t there for her, while self medicating, and ideally committing suicide rather than polluting our world.
I think she’s one of the biggest jokes the freedom, capitalist American world has allowed to be created, because sometimes, being rich shouldn’t be able to buy you the kind of exposure her dad bought for her because they were tired of her annoying shit, and figured it would get her out of their hair.
I think the biggest downfall of our generation is that she headed the “anyone can be famous” movement, even if they have no talent or an uneducated but still smart enough to know how to brand and market hherself as a fluffy piece of materialistic bullshit to morons can understand and little girls can mimic.
This video makes me angry but I have to hand it to her, she really doesn’t let a herpes outbreak get her down, or out of a bathing suit, I guess those herpes commercials aren’t just lies…..and you can actually go dancing, horseback riding or do all other things people who don’t have herpes can do….unfortunately, for Parish Hilton, Herpes isn’t a terminal disease, but I’m still hoping cancer or Aids or a plane crash, or car accident, puts her out of her misery, and by her misery, I mean my misery in having to watch this shit.
So today is Pamela Anderson’s big Valentine’s Day striptease performance at some legendary Parisian club and she is rumored to be going fully nude. Now one would think that this bitch is too old and washed up to be getting naked for anyone other than her Gyno and the random wanderers who have no where better to go, but it turns out that her tits are only about 15 years old and that’s not really counting the upgrades she’s had done to them. So in reality, watching her tits is on some next level pedophilia and that makes me uncomfortable. The good news is that the rest of her is falling apart and I wouldn’t be surprised if her Uterus flew out of her and landed in some french man’s soup. The good news is that french people love soup so that won’t ruin it for him. Like the time I dropped a slice of pizza I bought with my last dollar a few years ago that some asshole spat on because I slapped his girls ass in line waiting…no wait I used that dollar to try to trick a wasted hooker into giving me a blowjob by telling her it was a 100 and I found the pizza on the ground after the asshole beat up the guy in front of me thinking he grabbed his girlfriend’s ass…when it was really me. I guess I have no problem with people I don’t know taking the heat for me…but I do know that hooker I confused tasted a hell of a lot worse than my dirty pizza and I assume Pam Anderson is just somewhere in between.
Either way, good luck with your dance Pam, it may be your last chance to shine and when you’re done will your old lady hepatitis vagina and big ol’ trashy tits be my Valentine?
