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Archive for the Rachel Bilson Category

2010

11

Mar

Rachel Bilson and Her Lesbian Sweater of the Day

2 Comments »

I think her Canadian keeper has really succeeded at making Rachel Bilson boring as fuck. It’s like he’s kidnapped her sex appeal and locked it up in his fucking igloo or someshit so that no other guy looks at her or tries to fuck her. He’s even gone so far as to dress her in some native influenced sweater that you may or may not have seen every dyke wear this winter and when lesbians wear the shit, you know it’s not really something that girls are wearing to give boners. Good job Darth Vader…what don’t you fucking ruin? I guess we can only hope he gets in a snowmobile accident, or that he drives into a fucking moose or something while she’s in LA working, so that he’ll officially back the fuck off.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Lesbian|Rachel Bilson|Sweater

2010

09

Mar

Rachel Bilson in a Tight Dress of the Day

4 Comments »

Rachel Bilson is engaged to that annoying emo bitch of an actor from Star Wars, and he has kidnapped her, brainwashed her, surpressed her potential in being interesting by scaring her into thinking he will leave her, despite the fact that she can do better than him, but she doesn’t know that, thanks to his strategic lowering of her self-esteem, that’s left her feeling like she’s nothing without him. It has lead to a whole lot of boring out of her, so much boring that this outfit is probably her best, and all you can barely see her cleavage, making it really not that great, so everyone thank the new Darth Vader for ruining not only ruining Star Wars for the geeks, but also Rachel Bilson for everyone, you cunt…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Rachel Bilson|Tight Dress

2010

05

Mar

Rachel Bilson is Fucking Boring of the Day

3 Comments »

Fuck you Rachel Bilson, for seducing me early on in your career, and giving me hope that you’d be naked in movies, or at least in the party scene, feeding my fantasies at least a little, but instead you just got engaged, got boring and mock me with your conservative outfits, when I know under all that bullshit is a pussy that likes to be ravaged…it’s really insulting that she can live the good life off a cocktease….we need to start a revolt and make the bitch regain our trust to deserve our attention…any more of these boring bullshit pictures and I’m going to be forced to start putting all my energy in ruining this girl. First, I will be applying for a restraining order against her because my sex drive feels threatened by her constant boring pictures and then I am going to start a strongly worded petition that every man who likes fucking pussy will sign because this is seriously a waste of a perfectly good vagina…..and then someone should make her Canadian husband from Star Wars cheat on her so she can move on, the only access I have to him is through his sister who my friend fucked on a carpeted apartment floor in Toronto and humiliated her enough to make her hate both him and me, so we need another insider to start sending whores his way…then we’ll get Bilson back where she belongs, only with more emotional damage, something that always makes a bitch more slutty but until that happens, I hate her…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Boring|Rachel Bilson

2010

26

Feb

Rachel Bilson Gives Us a Glimpse of her Ass of the Day

5 Comments »

Rachel Bilson bores the fuck out of me. She’s one of those young actors who I wanted to fuck when she was on the OC because of her cute little voice I wanted to muffle by shoving my balls in her mouth, but instead of turning into an attention whore addicted to fame and cocaine and partying, she got engaged to some boring dude from Star Wars to live a simple life in Canada on a farm and when she does make appearances, because I assume she still works as an actor and spends time in LA, she looks like this, boring and plain and the only thing she gives us to try to jerk off to the memory of her, is a fuckin ass check barely visible and that’s real fucking shitty of her. She needs to give more to the people who gave her a fucking career and the good life her bank account reminds her about daily. Cunt.

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Ass|Rachel Bilson

2010

02

Feb

Rachel Bilson is Boring as Fuck of the Day

1 Comment »

Rachel Bilson is pretty fucking boring. She could have really done something with her life like publically humilate herself – develop a drug addiction – release a sex tape – turn to porn – show up to events half naked or flash the world her little brunette pussy…The world was her fucking oyster and instead she ran off and got engaged or married to fucking Luke Skywalker and live a quiet life on a farm in Canada, under the radar and not in the party scene making her waste of fucking time….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Boring|Rachel Bilson

2009

02

Dec

Rachel Bilson’s Sex Scene for Funny or Die of the Day

1 Comment »

I figure Rachel BIlson is worth fucking, despite the whole marrying that dude from Star Wars glitch in her life, but I was down with her on The OC, but in my defense, compared to Mischa Barton and her sloppy fucking ass the jewish dude and his dad from LA Law were second in line…..

Either way, this sex tape scene for Funny or Die to promote the new Rachel Bilson movie was probably the best Funny or Die video to date, which may not be saying much because I fucking hate Funny or Die, WIll Farrell and their marketing guy who never links to me even after begging me to post his videos….but it is a sign that maybe they are moving away from candy-coated Saturday Night Live boring humor and into the right direction into smuttier, racier shit the internet wants. See they’ve got the celebrity hook-ups and big budgets….they just need the balls to push the fucking limits a little….

That said, they should probably offer me a job as a consultant. I could use the constant income.

Posted in:Rachel Bilson|Sex Scene

2009

06

Nov

Rachel Bilson Does Poster Board of the Day

1 Comment »

Rachel Bilson was out buying suplies to make a poster, I’m thinkin’ it’s a “lost, Reward if Found” poster for her career….

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Little Body|Rachel Bilson

2009

04

Nov

Rachel Bilson is Skinny For Flaunt of the Day

No Comments »

The good thing about this photoshoot of Rachel Bilson for Flaunt magazine is that they photoshopped her fat, gonna be married, saddle bags off and made her look, thin long and luxurious like celebrity pussy is supposed to look….

Posted in:Flaunt|Photoshoot|Rachel Bilson

2009

27

Oct

Rachel Bilson and Her Saddle Bags of the DAy

4 Comments »

I am not a stylist, but I do have a penis, and my penis tells me that this pig of a woman needs to rock a pair of baggier pants or at least develop an eating disoder, because she is reminding me of my early childhood back in Mexico when the local vendor would pile up all his clay on the back of a fucking donkey, the same donkey my mom’s friends would fuck on stage for gringos, and I’ll tell you it’s not leaving a good taste in my mouth.

Sure, I know, hips and curves are supposed to be sexy and erotic, but I think that’s just propoganda the junk food and fast food companies are pushing on bitches so that they keep buying and sales don’t go to shit….or maybe this is just the product of aging and being engaged, a sign of what is to come, another bitch I wanted to fuck when she was on TV bites the dust kind of thing….

Either way, I’m not a fan…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Hips|Rachel Bilson

2009

20

Oct

Rachel Bilson Looks Shitty in Shorts of the Day

4 Comments »

So this is what Rachel Bilson actually looks like….interesting…..

She’s go short pasty legs, looks pretty sloppy and unshowered like a bitch suffering from some kind of depression cuz she can’t get work and hates her life, she may even be a little chubby….but I can’t really tell because I am blinded by brightness of her white legs, like she’s shining a fucking flashlight in my eyes or some shit…..

I guess some people like to call this the look of someone who has given up, I like to call it the look of someone about to get marriage and the point of all this is to say, I’d still fuck her.

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Rachel Bilson|Shitty|Shorts