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Archive for the Sports Illustrated Category

2024

14

May

Sports Illustrated Swim Delivers the Inclusivity and Body Positivity to Appease the Fatties So they Can Post Hotties of the Day

Read the title of this post….and visit SI SWIM for all their content….that involves hotties that aren’t just clickbait or virtue signalling fatties for the fat fetishists….

In other weird strategy they did a shoot and gave the cover to GAYLE KING, Oprah’s rumored lover, who I am sure is actually Oprah’s lover because Oprah was molested as a child and even got pregnant through incest which is naturally the backstory of all billionaire talk show hosts…or the backstory of many lesbians…becasue statistically molested at that level means no more cock.

Since Oprah is the power player in the media, having her girl posing sexy in swimsuits seems like something a power player would do for their jerk off material….plus Oprah probably owns the magazine.

Posted in:Sports Illustrated|Sports Illustrated Swimsuit

2021

19

Jul

Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Happened of the Day

There was a time when the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue was a big deal, I remember jerking off to it as a kid…I remember loving Elle Macpherson, probably the first of the models I can remember jerking off to back in 1987, with her tits out in their 25 year reunion video I got my hands on. She was amazing…

But yeah, there was a time when you had limited options for masturbating to tits, from VS Catalogs, to Sears Catalogs, to Fashion Magazines, to Playboy and other titty mags most people were too shy to buy, maybe the occassional Photo mag or National Geographic and Sports Illustrated SWIM…..the eye candy for the subscribers…and girls wanted that stamp of approval. Being in SI SWIM was a huge deal…

Then instagram happened, the amateur photographer could mimic SI SWIMSUIT pics with an iphone, then SI trying to stay woke and relevant decided to use fat or handicapped girls, so the people said “I’ll just get my bikini pics from the source, I don’t need some editorialized sports magazine to put that together “….but girls..still want that stamp of approval…it gives their bikini pics more purpose or value and it even helps out on adding value for your SUGAR DADDIES….but the pics themselves are terribly fucking boring….but they released the magazine today and we’ve got a bit of a preview…

For the rest of them, check out SPORTS ILLUSTRATED since no one else probably is. We’ve got Kate Bock, Meg thee Stallion, Sports Hooker Olivia Culpo and Test Tube Baby Skriver…

TO SEE SOME OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Sports Illustrated

2018

15

Feb

Georgia Gibbs Got Them Titties On of the Day

Georgia Gibbs Tits Out in a tight white dress

Her name is Georgia Mae Gibbs, and with a name like Georgia Mae, I’d assume she was some farmer’s daughter in the midewest who drank the right amount of hormone jacked up milk, and hormone jacked up chicken, to give her a hormone jacked tits, that allowed her to live out her dream being a Sports Illutrated girl…

Turns out she’s Australian, and thus way sluttier than a Farmer’s Daughter, they are an adventurous people who like to escape their island to tour the world…and more interestingly…she was an Australia Top Model…which I guess got her the followers to lead to this magical Swimsuit model moment…

She was also some Miss Australia, so she’ been at this for awhile…and look at her now…bikini modeling..while looking 40…as Aussies do.

Georgia Gibbs Tits Out

Here she is nude for sports illustrated

Her being hot in a bikini

TO SEE THE REST OF THE SI SWIM SHOOTS WHERE THEY ARE PHOTOSHOPPED CLICK HERE

Posted in:Georgia Gibbs|SFW|Sports Illustrated

2018

13

Feb

Sports Illustrated Nonsense of the Day

Why would a sports magazine encourage fat chicks to be fat? They should focus on Athletes, fat is unhealthy as fuck….it would make more sense to go body positive with chicks in shape, not fucking pig women with their guts hanging out…

I don’t need to see chicks who look like me in bikinis….

Then there’s the other models they use, who we see naked all the time on their feed making these pics obsolete and silly, cuz we can see these girls naked all the time and don’t need an over hyped, brand supported, bullshit….

But here’s a preview on the bullshit because I have been posting this shit for over a decade and I won’t stop now, unless they send me lawyer letters….because I don’t evolve, but SI tried to and they seem to be failing hard at it…cuz NO ONE cares about them or their fat chicks…

I think their strategy is “If we put in fat chicks, we can sexualize hot chicks, the way we always have”….

We know they are all creeps..

Gymnast Rape Victim – Erotica – Sexualizing Herself – Weird – Empowering….

Alexis Ren – Sex Worker – in Sex Worker Poses

Allie Ayers

Anne de Paula

Big Girl Ashley Graham

Barbara Palvin

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Danielle Herrington

Ebonee Davis

Eugenie Bouchard

Hailey Clauson

Haley Kalil

Big GIrl Hunter McGrady

Brenna Huckaby

Iyonna Fairbanks

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Kate Bock

Big Girl Kate Wasley

The OG Big Girl Kate – Kate Upton

Lais Ribeiro

Olivia Culpo

Olivia Jordan

Raven Lyn

Robyn Lawley

Samantha Hoopes

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

VIA SI.com

Posted in:SFW|Sports Illustrated

2018

19

Jan

Olivia Culpo is SI Rookie of the Day

I don’t like promoting that bunk shit that is Sports Illustrated at all…

I think they are just master clickbaiters who officially don’t matter now that the world is one big bikini photoshoot…

Where every single girl who has a social media account is pulling off similar shoots in just as amazing places.

I do not think their random choices for cover girls, or random choices for rookies, means anything at all.

I don’t even think they have the power to really create celebrity anymore, sure there was Kate Upton that carried them harder in a time they needed it, but I am sure they still need all the help they can get.

But here are The Rookies anyway..

Olivia Culpo – the White one who obviously cashed in a favor, because she was at one point a Jonas brother fuck, and now a bikini model…who doesn’t even model but rather goes to random events and no one cares…

Ebonee Davis who fills the black card, need a black card filled, she’s an actual model so I get it….

And this last one, the FAT ONE, Hunter McDonalds McGrady to cater to FAT people and not be CRITICIZED for not being body positive, but for being fat shamers, despite everyone on set being disgusted by this whole movement, while everyone who looks at the pics are disgusted by the movement, in a sure, be confident in yourself on your own damn channels, don’t fucking make me look at this weirdo fetish shit…it’s fucking weird…seriously…

Is this a public service for how you shouldn’t look…or is it a celebration of diabetes?

Fat is not healthy, don’t fucking make people think it is, your magazine is called Sports Illustrated…

Why do people give into the pressure of society, just fucking own that you don’t want fatties in your book…you’re not that kind of porno…

Instead you give in like this bitch gives into her McDonald’s cravings.

THE WORLD IS FUCKING NUTS….

Throwback to Olivia Culpo Nude for Fashion

Posted in:Sports Illustrated

2017

17

Feb

Slutty Models at the SI SWIM EVENT of the Day

Got these women are so fucking basic, cheesy, trashy….the pregnant Hannah Davis all filled up with a Derek Jeter herpes baby probably the most interesting…but still not that interesting…live in this bubble where they think what they do matters, is important, is status, and it’s really just fucking dull..

So they get made up, go to events celebrating a magazine release that no one really cares about, thanks to instagram killing the bikini model, and the bikini magazine…thank god…

But I guess social media also killed the internet, the web is dead, this site included so in a lot of ways – I have a lot in common with these women…and for that they should eat my ass…if only I was rich enough…because like all women…they like rich dudes…

Either way….here’s the event arrivals that look like the lamest fucking prom ever…and why are all the models middle aged? Weird…not to mention – they all look fat…

Who cares about their names are – they are all the worst…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Sports Illustrated

2017

15

Feb

Sports Illustrated Swim – Big Launch No One Cares About of the Day

I consistently say that Instagram killed the bikini model, or maybe it created the DIY bikini model, who in many cases is hotter than the bikini model, probably a little more desperate than the actual getting paid bikini models, sometimes bigger earners than the actual bikini models, because lets face it, getting in a bikini shouldn’t be something girls get rich off of, but why the fuck not spread some of that around to more pussy, that is probably not as egotistical because they aren’t in the right circles, getting cast in movies but want it so bad…

So in ways, I laugh at bikini instagram girls imitating magazines and catalogs…in their spare time, but they are producing slutty half naked content….but I actually like those thirsty girls more than the actual models…because they are all equally bullshit…and the aspiring sluts are better than the sluts who think they are established..

It’s a new generation, you don’t need magazines like this, it’s not a big deal…dudes don’t actually fucking care…we have instagram…but let’s post some of their pics as a tribute to a dying scam…the bikini issue that carried a brand in an era where bikinis weren’t everywhere…when they were still a simple tactic to post innocent seductive pics for attention….but just not for everyone….you needed film,, cameras, audience…now you don’t need this…

Yet, the insta sluts….aspire to be in this…to stamp of approval their bullshit lives…

Anyway – There’s a bunch of nipples – their only potential for a win…..PORNOGRAPHERS….how can their advertisers support this SMUT….More Nudity Than Playboy…

Kate Upton, Cover Girl, Still Fat, Photoshopped But Better than Recent Years…

Caroline Wozniacki – Because Tennis Pussy is Good Pussy…

Hannah Ferguson Big Tits and Nipples…

Default Hannah Davis aka Hannah Jeter aka Hannah Herpes….


TO SEE THE PICS CLICK HERE

Homegrown – Eugenie Bouchard – Straight from the Tennis Court of Montreal…(her sister is hotter)

Aly Raisman Because Fitness Gymnasts are Bendy

Samantha HOOPES who I’ve heard is a hooker – and her Nipples…

Hailey Clauson Last Years Cover – The Forgotten One – They Didn’t Even Bring to the Beach…oh no they did…

Myla Dalbesio and Her Monster Tits and Nipples…This is a Porn Site…..


TO SEE THE PICS CLICK HERE

Barbara Palvin

Bo Krsmanovic Great Tits…

Bianca Balti is Amazing….

Kate Bock who the fuck is that…


TO SEE THE PICS CLICK HERE

Nina Agdal is Leo’s Girl – and Old….and Retard Looking – But Has Nipples

Ana De Paula with the POSE of the Year…

LOOK A BEACHED WHALE PARODYING THE BIKINI MODEL EXPERIENCE….which annoys me because for the last 10 years i’ve wanted to do fat chicks as SI models in a parody site / campaign to release the same day SI does – as an LOL but now the fatties – are mainstream and no longer a joke…BUMMER

Serena Williams Did Some Sports Illustrated porn that is totally unneccessary – but at least she’s an athlete and not some slutty, gold digging, “bikini” model…all fucking basic and boring and lame…if SI wants to survive…maybe focus their swim issue on people who don’t live in bikinis with rich guys…pretty logical to me…

Christie Brinkley Sacrificed herself to get her famewhore daughters in the magazine, as SI does anything they can to spin a story or to get people talking about their bullshit…

Simone Biles – Because America Pride…USA.USA.USA.


TO SEE THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:SFW|Sports Illustrated

2015

09

Feb

Some Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Bullshit of the Day

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Sports Illustrated hate when I rip off their shitty catalog quality pictures of girls in bikinis, that don’t really go as viral as they want them to, because without Kate Upton and her big sloppy tits, no one actually cares about random girls in bikinis, thanks to the internet, we don’t need to wait for the big reveal once a year to get excited about this kind of thing…I mean 90 percent of instagram is bikinis…not to mention Sports Illustrated has a site dedicated to their swimsuit issue, meaning any day of the week I can access this shit….not like in the 70s and 80s when it was either this or Playboy, and my cunt wife didn’t let me get Playboy, so i would just fixate on this…and get excited by this and be like “no evil wife, this is Sports Illustrated”…

Either way, it’s all boring, it’s not exciting, people don’t really care anymore, it’s called porno is just as easy to access, but I guess I’m hanging on as hard as they are….so I’m going to post it and pretend it’s 1993….it was a happier time….

To See All The Pics CLICK HERE

The models who you can see in bikinis all year round thanks to instagram are:

Gigi Hadid
Nina Agdal
Hannah Ferguson
Sara Sampaio
Emily Ratajkowski
Emily Didonato
Samantha Hoopes
Chanel Iman
Hannah Davis
Solveig Mork
Hailey Clauson
Rose Bertram
Ashley Smith
Kelly Rohrbach
Robyn Lawley
Erin Heatherton
Kate Bock
Ariel Meredith
Genevieve Morton
Irina Shayk
Lily Aldridge
Chrissy Teigen
Jessica Gomes

The athletes, since it is sports are:

Ronda Rousey
Caroline Wozniacki

The pictures are:

Shit. The girls look like shit. Overall, maybe I’m jaded or densitized, but this is all pretty shit…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Visit Sports Illustrated To See Everything

Here’s a couple of bonus nipples:

Posted in:Sports Illustrated

2015

06

Feb

Sports Illustrated’s “First Plus Sized Model” of the Day

X158332_TK4_01607

I think the better PR play on this whole Plus Sized model thing, is not calling the models plus sized models, because if you are really trying to be politically correct, they should just do what they did with Kate Upton, squeeze her into bikinis that are too small for her, and pretend she’s a model…the people will listen…the people will believe…but the second you say – Plus Sized…you’re pretty much saying fat bitch in a bikini because it is good for business….

I am convinced this is not their first Plus Sized model…I am sure if they had a weigh in – Kate Upton would lose…

Here name is Robyn Lawley … I’ve posted her fat chick tits before…but no one celebrates me.

SISwimsuitPlus

Posted in:Robyn Lawley|Sports Illustrated

2015

05

Feb

Hannah Davis SI Cover of the Day

hannah-davis-swimsuit-cover-reveal-2015

This isn’t news….but the PR Machine wants you to think it is..

I make fun of Sports Illustrated Swimsuit all the time, but only because I find it pedestrian, basic, low concept, repetitive, boring…interchangeable…and one of these things that is not progressive, you know they tell you they are 40 years deep, but they haven’t done anything controversial in the last 10 of those 40 years….I distinctly remember jerking off to Elle Mcpherson’s nipples in 1989…..but since then…it’s been just a bunch of girls in bikinis…usually free models…basically instagram…

But today, my friend I’ve never met, but may have tweeted at once about being Naomi Watt’s brother, Benn Watts, who has done this kind of shoot forever…got the cover…with Hannah Davis….and they are showing her bald pubic mount…because I guess Sports Illustrated girls aren’t like fashion hipster models…and wax that mound….I mean to anyone with any vision…a bush sneaking out would have made this the best ever…but thanks to porn and the Kardashians and marketing..hair is bad…for now..

Either way, Texas’ own…going strong. All American….babes in bikinis…can’t hate that…unless your family was killed by a babe in a bikini…in which case you can.

Posted in:Hannah Davis|Sports Illustrated