Bathing suits make the whole world go round…at least on the internet, which for you virgin losers is basically the whole world, because without the internet, your masturbation practices would be far more criminal….especially when it comes to jerking off to bitches you work with and know, but on the internet, that shit is produced and fed to you with every bikini-clad beach vacation.

So here are some people posting swimsuits for no reason but to show off the swimsuits because everyone knows that’s the only thing people want to see a motherfucker wear.

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I may be of the school of thought that the best thing to wear to the beach is nothing, but that typically offends the moms on the beach and potentially gets you arrested, depending on what oppressive beach that turns their back on the true human experience of ridding yourself of the social constructs of man, like clothing…

I also don’t really believe that me naked on the beach does anyone any favors, not even myself, unless I’m sunning my asshole, in hopes of getting rid of the anal cancer by burning it off…

I do believe that girls should be naked all the time, beaches included, and I guess the swimsuit is as close as we get to that, so that’s what makes them so exciting and why they fuel the internet and social media.

We need these bikini pics for our survival….she here you go.

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I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, because repetition is not necessarily a sign of craziness, but it’s a sign of craziness, and I’m fucking LOCO bro.

But yeah, the bikini was the intro to so much internet whoredom, where ladies would see all the hype other girls posting bikinis got and want to post their own bikini pics to feel like they fit in….so they’d turn to health, wellness, eating disorders, starvation, LIPO, filters, fillers and the other trash on the internet all to be best prepared to put their best bikini pic forward, realizing how much traction they got compared to their other bullshit, realizing they should focus on that.

Even celebrities like Hayek are open about “My bikini pics do so well, you clearly like them, so here’s another bikini pic, even though I’m old as shit”….because bikini pics work, we’re perverts, they are exhibitionists and the stats and views validate them, and the stats and views on bikini pics are higher….so they realize “that’s the content stream, that’s the hustle, that’s the money”….and it’s a gateway to viral success, ONLYFANS success, Porn success…you know the dipping a toe into getting jerked off to while pretending it’s an innocent bikini pic, which is hot.

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The bathing suit is pretty much the foundation of the internet, along with hardcore free porn, but as an accessible level of easy and shameless but not overly shameless that it’s scary to produce content from basically all bitches who go on vacation, the bathing suit is responsible for social media’s success…..because every dude friended colleagues and old friends to see them half naked….not to see their shitty kids, their shitty gossip or life wins and losses they whine about….but the vacation pics…

I may be more keen on bathing suits because I live in a place where the only bathing suits I see are on fat chicks tanning because they are too old to give a shit, and not the hot chicks going to the cooler places than what I am allowed to go, where they wear those bikinis…so I turn to the internet….to celebrate the only article of clothing that matters, that inspires, that you can jerk off to knowing it’s outdoor appropriate yet still so slutty for the average chick to put on, yet they ALL put it on with ease….even the most prude bitch is totally fine slipping into a fucking g-string so long as it’s a bikini….like the fact it is a bikini makes it ok….and I’m into keeping that trend going!

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It’s the Fourth of July motherfuckers….

If you’re not in or around people in bikinis you’re not living your best independent life…sure you may be a dude and not accustomed to wearing bikinis, but in these modern times, that bikini wearing will allow you in the women’s locker room where you can see the women changing in and out of their bikinis, which is FAR more powerful than the shame your fat ass feels walking around in a bikini…

Remember, your ancestors fought for this independence, that I am sure is not actually independence at all, but at least they tell you it is….so that you have the right to be a racist, be a bigot, shoot guns, be obese, be transgender or any pronoun or gender you want, and all that other good old fashioned American shit….

I’m more of a traditionalist and satisfied with the bikini shit…

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They say that the internet was created as a tool to track everyone on all levels of their life, from their conversations, their inner most intimate thoughts, their porn habits, their shopping habits, their locations, their bank accounts, you know as a mechanism of population control and manipulation through the data they pulled from everyone…..

But I like to think that the internet was created as a tool for chicks to post their bikini and swimsuit pics from vacation….which actually be a tool to get people to get onboarded onto the soul sucking, identity stealing, mind shaping internet machine, you know “post bikini pics, all retards will come like mice in a cage being rewarded so that we can get what we want out of them, oh and MAKE it free so that there are no barriers of entry”……but that’s far too dystopian for a wonderful phenomenon of SO MUCH bikini content being produced every day…..

Here’s a round-up of swimwear to start the day right.

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I just saw some old fat lady walking around the city streets in a bikini top…her gut sticking out, her sloppy tits hanging out of them in the least attractive possible way and I thought to myself “I fucking love summer, BIKINI SEASON”…..because even when bikinis are gross, they are life changing….or at least something to look at and sometimes that’s all we need.

Here’s some swimsuit girls I was supposed to post on Tuesday…

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Here’s a gallery of women in their swimsuits to remind you that you don’t have to go to the beach to see bitches in bathing suits, you don’t need to creep out on girls at the public pool to see bitches in bathing suits, you don’t need to break into condo complexes or private residences or health clubs with pools to see bitches in bathing suits….you can just kick back from the comfort of wherever the fuck you are on your screen and experience it through the screen…

One could argue that that access to bitches in swimsuits is detrimental to society, that it’s the foundation of all that is wrong in society, that bitches in bathing suits upload their bathing suits to get as much reach as they can with their bathing suit….all for lazy pigs at home who they probably don’t really want to seeing them in bathing suits if they knew how fucking weird we actually were….

I’d be one of those people, as I post a gallery of bathing suits, saying all these bathing suits are an ATTACK on our freedom by trying to keep us locked up at home, locked into a screen from our pod, getting a version of bitches in bathing suits, just not a real experience of bitches in bathing suits….IT IS ALL FAKE…PIXELS ON A SCREEN…>GET OUTSIDE AND GET YOUR HUMAN FREAK ON BEFORE HUMANS ARE REPLACED….

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As you may or may not know, the swimsuit is basically what keep the internet going…

It is responsible for Zuckerberg’s billions of dollars, he can pretend it’s due to his tech that gathers everyone’s data that he can re-sell and use against them, while conditioning them to think how he wants them to think, buy what he wants them to buy, and all that other shit….

BUT NONE OF THAT WOULD BE POSSIBLE….without the self starting whore and her bikini pics to make a dude say “I’m going to sign up to this tracking software disguised as a place to stay connected with friends because bitches post their bikini pics there”….

So here’s to the power of the swimsuit and the weakness of the average dude….that allows the swimsuit to be that powerful…

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Here’s our weekly reminder that the single most important clothing item in the history of clothing is not the wool jacket to keep you warm in winter, it’s not the fur jacket to keep you warm in winter, it’s not the oiled sheepskin to keep you dry in the rain, it’s not protective eyewear to protect you from dust storms, it’s not underwear to keep your nasty ass juices one extra layer away from the public, you biohazard cunt…it’s the bikini….

There’s just something about swimwear, the stripping down to swim, making it almost more exciting than being naked, actually in most cases, it is MORE exciting that full naked, and that’s why it fuels the internet the way it does.

Some of us grew up in an ice tundra and the bathing suit was a gift, a special occassion experience which probably makes me way too into bikinis, when I see one, I stop in my tracks to stare….every fucking time….but it barely works for me, and that’s ok….

Bikini all day bro…

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