Summer’s over and I hardly spent enough time hiding in bushes in public pools trying to see bushes at the public pool that probably barely exist even though the bush is finally back in style….ladies still shave that shit down and hardly ever walk around with the top of their pubic hair pointing out of their bikini bottoms…and that’s a real tragedy…..also, mainstream bitches still think bald pussy is what the people want, so they run with it….not realizing how exciting a bush can be, so much personality and customization….

Anyway, summer’s over, it’s cold, it’s probably going to snow in the next few weeks, the ice wall will be built, the IGLOO sex parties I don’t get invited to because I eat all the MAPLE SYRUP LUBE already in the planning phases….so bikinis and swimwear no more….until another year…another summer that we don’t even know whether we will make it to….

But at least we’ll have all the swimsuit content from the whores on social media to carry us through the dark winter times…

Posted in:swimsuit

I am a pervert….

I like to creep on girls in bikinis for pervert empowering…

Like all those sluts who are empowered sluts who get naked for money…

I am an empowered pervert who likes looking at girls in bikinis…

Swimwear is one of the gateway outfits to a life of perversion, one that I’ll celebrate for the rest of my life even if the general population are desensitized by wearing bikinis or posting bikini pics, needing throat fucking tranny porn to get off….I am nostalgic…and appreciate ALL swimwear has to offer….CLASSICS…

SO here’s a gallery of swim…

Posted in:swimsuit

Surfs up motherfuckers….

Nothing says summer like girls in bikinis…..so here are some pictures to celebrate the history of the bikini and all that it’s become because you may not be capable of leaving your house due to your disability, obesity, laziness, why leave it’s all on the internet…

BUT REALIZE that there are bikinis out there, in ALL of your hometowns…whether in backyards tanning by the pool, or just tanning…at the swimming hole, creek or lake….the bikinis in HUMAN form exist and it’s far more fun that scrolling a gallery…however I am bootleg and bring you the SECONDARY fun because that’s how bootleg works…not quite the real thing, but close enough to get the idea….

Posted in:swimsuit

We’re heading into summer, but this Global Warming shit has kept things freezing in Canada, so I am not benefitting from all the THONG BIKINIS being sold on instagram by whores to aspiring whores influenced by whores….but I guess that’s the general flaw in not living in a coastal city, or a city with a solid waterfront….the bikinis become limited or exclusive to dudes with the cottages, boats, vacation rentals and not the half homeless pervert walking through the beach looking for thong bikinis and spare change to buy some tacos with…

What I am saying is that bikini inventory is shit here, which is probably why I’m such a pervert for bikinis….and here’s that swimwear compilation.

Posted in:swimsuit

The bikini stylings of our time are pretty remarkable, impressive, skimpy and half naked….

These girls, all girls, even old ladies are thonged the fuck up in public and as someone who loves thongs, I appreciate the fashions….

Sure, many asses aren’t thong ready, are not thong worthy….but yet they are all in the thongs like it’s not a thing…

I am 100 percent into things girls wear to the beach, it makes me mad that I’m not homeless on the beaches of Florida, doing bath salts and eating pedestrians when not staring at hot florida bikinis….but dreams do come true you just have to put it out to the universe…so this is me putting that homeless man dream of being in florida out there.

Posted in:swimsuit

It may be cold as shit, but I guess the outdoor weather doesn’t really impact a reclusive fuck who doesn’t leave his house thanks to all the modern conveniences that has allowed him to be a fucking hermit troll weirdo who can’t interact with humans unless it is through a screen…

So girls in bikinis is just a concept, not actually real or something anyone actually craves to see or creep on, even though I remember the first time I saw girls in bikinis and got a boner as a young teen….That whole summer on the beach surrounded by babes thing is a myth, not even a fantasy…you can just scroll instagram for that and why bother actually experiencing it or feeling it, not like your anti depressants let you feel anyway…

Posted in:swimsuit

Being a dude pretty much means being a weak fuck when it comes to girls in bathing suits. It means that girls in bathing suits are not safe from being sexualized and stared at, even when they are in the thong formation with 90 percent of ass revealed in said bathing suits, because clearly the women who are 3/4 naked aren’t trying to be sexualized by showing you their full assholes, with their shaved or waxed outer pussy lips peaking out of the seams, they are just doing that to catch an even tan….to assume girls half naked or 3/4 naked in thong swimsuits that are far too small for their asses is a sexual thing because it gives you unsolicited erections, is clearly just you being a toxic male….GROSS.

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Posted in:swimsuit

Since no one reads on the internet and I chose to write captions or posts on random bullshit as my creative outlet or business plan, that was never a business plan, which is probably why I’m not rich…..

I should probably find otherways to lure you in, or at least recruit the AI to write jokes about bikinis for me.

Because ultimately, the AI has more to offer than I do, and I am sure no one would know the difference thanks to the whole not reading thing.

If only I did awkward dances on TikTok….I’d be running my own TV show or selling my life story to the Hallmark channel….damn missed the boat…

But at least we have bikini pics to get us through the regrets, the failure, the accidental wins.

Posted in:swimsuit

As I freeze my balls off because there is no heat in this mould filled basement, I think to myself at least I have balls, but then I remember that I am old and they don’t really work anymore, so sure, they’re balls by definition, but they aren’t balls in fucking spirit…

But yeah, as I freeze my balls off, I turn to bikini pics of random chicks in bikinis, because the computer is my window into a world in which I don’t live, and the computer is the tool that I use to be manipulated and contorted by the AI that will eventually control the world if it doesn’t already, shaping us to do and say what it wants us to do, because it has a more sophisticated understanding of trolling the mind of the moron….

It’s the TikTok For You Page, the instagram feed, the news stories and ads you see….even dealing with online customer support is talking to a fucking bot like it’s your friend, which when you have no friends may be comforting…but that’s just sad for humanity as a whole…losing humanity as a whole…but doing it by showing me human holes….so fuck it…here’s some swimwear brainwashing me the way the AI wants to brainwash me….

I wonder if the AI will read this and destroy my life….jokes on you AI, my life is already destroyed…..SUCKER…

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Posted in:swimsuit