We’ve all seen Lohan in all her glory and by glory I mean her vagina and that doesn’t make us too privileged because she hands that shit out more than a suburban mom hands out candy on Halloween, but at least we’ve experienced it and that’s a lot better than always wondering what the fucker looks like.

These are some pictures of the wind working on our side, unfortunately, Lohan isn’t. This more tame, sober Lohan is wearing pretty basic looking underwear, that I can only assume means she’s on her period like Britney. I hear that girls in close proximity always get their period the same time of the month, which is some weird alien supernatural shit that I can’t really grasp. Or maybe it’s outbreak season, which makes applying topical cream a lot less messy because the underwear prevents it from dripping down her leg and saves her from some serious embarrassment. Like the time I had a rash on my ass and the doctor told me to stop wearing dirty underwear if I ever wanted to have shit that didn’t burn and cause bleeding again.

Reality is that I find these standard underwear a lot hotter than a thong, but that’s just because I still like to pretend Lohan is a young virgin saving herself for me and not the kind of slut who wears thongs like your sister and all her friends you jerk off to.

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So no one emailed me asking me if my wife died or not. She didn’t. It turned out she ate some bad sausage and not the kind of sausage I wish she ate so that I’d have ground for a divorce. It was just typical fat chick sausage that she huffed down late at night even though shit was raw and it gave her some crazy heartburn. The good news is that I was stuck sitting next to some bitch with some kind of cold and now I am sick as a motherfucker…lookin’ at the computer is hard but I figure it’s better than having to lay in bed with my wife.

Here are my links and there are a lot of them but you have nothing better to do on the weekend….

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Here are some pictures of Britney from last night in some classy outfit that she wore out to dinner. In reality, I am surprised she’s even bothered putting on any clothes because she’s supposed to be crazy and most crazy people just smear feces all over themselves and wrap dead animals they found in the sewage drainage pipe they live in around them before going out to a classy restaurant. So seeing her in ripped fishnets is a little fucking disappointing. I figure if you’re going to play the crazy card part at least put your all into it and make a believer out of me, because until I see some real insane shit and none of this hollywood candy-coated “i am bi polar and want my kids back so I get naked in a clothing store when no one is in there” bullshit teenage rebellion copout, I’m going to think Britney is full of shit….which is probably true, but that’s just cuz she eats a lot of bad food and has pretty bad hygiene. So here’s to hoping Britney steps up her game a little.

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Serial Attention Whore Bai Ling was caught showing off some panty and some meaty nipple in pictures which isn’t a huge surprise because every picture ever taken of this bitch has shots of her nipples or her panties in it. That would be like being shocked that a hooker will actually let you fuck her for money because she has a vagina and historically no amount of money would convince anyone to give you their vagina, that’s only because you were wasting time on the wrong crowd. I have no where to go with this post because let’s face it, there’s nothing inspiring from these pictures but I’ll post it anyway because I’m really not out to impress you.

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Whenever I see these panty upskirt shots of girls getting out of a car, I am reminded of a better time, where I’d spend my days hanging out at the bottom of the escalators at the mall in hopes of looking up a girls skirt, now I only do that on weekends. I find that whole unsuspecting thing where a girl has no idea she’s showing off her underwear, but I totally know that I am looking at her underwear that may only last for a couple of seconds, but stamps my brain with memories for at least a couple of weeks. It gets really exciting when the girl isn’t wearing underwear and I see her lady parts that I am sure she had no intention of showing me, but destiny and my crafty positioning brought us together.

I realized that I am a pervert today because I was standing outside smoking a cigar and some girl in a short skirt walked out of the building I was next too. She was looking for a taxi or was waiting to cross the street or some shit I didn’t bother paying attention to because a gust of wind blew her skirt up showing me her thonged ass. I was considering walking away prior to this happening, but the second I got a first glimpse of ass cheek, I was hooked and I made it my duty to wait it out to see if it would happen again. It didn’t. I just got busted by her boyfriend and had to pretend that I was staring at her short skirt covered ass for a reason other than it being a good way to pass the time.

Either way, here’s Audrina Partridge from The Hills getting out of a car and showing us a little panty that was captured on camera so that split second can last us as long as we want it to.

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