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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2007

13

Apr

I am – Paris Hilton Upskirt of the Day

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I was talking to someone today about how the older this bitch gets the more she looks like a dude. She always had the feet the size of a basketball player and I never really bothered taking it as a sign, but now it’s hard to miss, especially when she’s got more bulge in her panties than I do when I wear women’s clothing. I don’t do it because I get off to it, I do it because times are tough and my wife got fat leaving all kinds of panties that are in my size, so being a practical person, I figured why the fuck bother buying new shit when we had perfectly good ones lying around, not to mention they make me feel pretty and a guy is allowed to feel pretty sometimes by my rules.

Either way, here’s a Paris upskirt to get you through your day. Cuddles.

Posted in:Paris Hilton|Unsorted

2007

13

Apr

I am – Joss Stone Tending Bar of the Day

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This is today’s fetish post, because any girl pouring a drink is something worth getting off to. I always had a thing for girls behind a bar. It is mainly because I am an alcoholic and the woman who brings me and my love together is pretty much my personal savior. The other reason I like barmaids is because they are hot, wear low cut shirt and tight short skirts trying to seduce me into tipping them. They also have no choice but to talk to me so I get to drop all my insanity on them in one night of drinking and they just smile and nod making me feel like a star.

Joss Stone is obviously doing this as some sort of publicity stunt I don’t fucking understand but I don’t get out much so maybe it all makes sense to you. I was hoping that her career after singing involved more public penis in vagina action, but maybe it’s too soon to ask for that much…give the bitch some time.

Posted in:Joss Stone|Unsorted

2007

13

Apr

I am – Brooke Hogan Sports Bra of the Day

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I hate sportsbras. I have never really had to deal with a girl in a sportsbra because I usually let them know from day one that I can’t deal with that shit around me. It flattens out their tits and makes me feel like I am hanging out with a jogger or a dude who just got back from the gym and that normally doesn’t turn me on unless I am really drunk.

I can’t think of any sportsbra stories, other than some girls in highschool who had retardedly big tits using them to tone down their junk, obviously not one of Brooke Hogan’s issues. But who cares what I think, if you’re into trannies with orange skin, that’s your deal and I an not going to judge. I figure everyone you know will when it comes out and that’s enough for you to handle.

Reality is that this bitch was fat and hit the gym, now she feels like it’s her right to show the world what she’s packing like ever fat girl who doesn’t realize she’s still fat because she’s the skinniest she’s ever been. This is just a case of a fat girl in slutty gear thinking it’s all okay when it obviously isn’t. That said, I’d still lick her ass right after she took a shit.

Posted in:Brooke Hogan|Unsorted

2007

13

Apr

I am – Cerina Vincent Tits of the Day

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I have never heard of this girl and it doesn’t really matter because she has some tits on her and I am one of those guys who can see past a shitty personality, a dumpy ass, a little extra fat in the gunt for a good set of cans. I was rocking facebook earlier this week and came across some L.A. socialite’s you’ve never heard of, one of them responded to me and I added her to AIM. We got to talking and she was a little thrown off by a random 35 year old dude chatting her up. I tried using the site to get her comfortable, but it didn’t get me very far. It turned out she was a 15 year old model who parties with Paris Hilton. She blocked me when I asked her if she’s banged anyone famous, because 15 year old girls take that shit a lot more seriously than I do. Either way, she’s pretty much an unknown and is just getting started, but it goes to show you that I don’t know everything, so this Cerina bitch could be famous but for now – just look at those cans.

Posted in:Cerina Vincent|Unsorted

2007

13

Apr

I am – Alessandra Ambrosio Wants Peace of the Day

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I was having a bit of a religious experience earlier today. I was sitting on a bench and some crazy christian lady started to chat me up. She asked me if I had accepted Jesus in my life. She told me that no matter how low I got, he would be there for me. She went off on how he died for our sins and that there’s some group that meets every friday night at the local church and how I should attend because there was pizza. I told her that Friday night was my night for drinking my sins away and she didn’t laugh. Then I asked her if she asked everybody to join her cult and she said that she only spoke to people she felt could use some help from above. I told her that I guess her church was hurting if she was recruiting homeless people and bribing them with food. I asked her if there were any barely legal people in her clergy or whatever the fuck you call it, and she said that they had more girls than guys. I always work on ratio so tomorrow I may be going to get some free food and easily influenced lonely virgin eighteen year old. Fuck, I’ll accept anyone in my life it introduces me to fresh tail.

To celebrate my new found journey to sainthood, here are some pictures of some Catholic Brazilian piece of ass who models lingerie and bikinis like a good christian who strayed. Cuddles.

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|Unsorted

2007

12

Apr

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

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I was offered a free haircut today because that’s how much the neighborhood hair stylists like me. I think it was more out of sympathy, like when you see the cops checking homeless people’s pulses on in the park late at night, but I went for it anyway, because there is nothing more exciting than having an old lady touching my head. I feel like I am about 10 pounds lighter and like I look like a total cunt…

I am not dropping this donate here button because I haven’t hit 1500 dollars yet. All I am asking for is a dollar – so if you read this site and like this site help. If you don’t I won’t really be able to come after you but trust me, I’d like to, especially if you’re young, hot and into gymnastics.












Here are my links of the day.

American Idol Slut Olivia Mojica Has a Sex Tape, Here’s The Trailer and Details and Shit
GO

If you are a loser, which you are – DJ AM is Playing at a Virtual Club from 7 – 9 cuz He’s Gayer than Bicycle Shorts. Check it out…
GO

A Whole Lot of Topless Beach Pics
GO

Britney Spears Giggles like a School Girl
GO

Liz Vicious is Gothic and Showing Her Box
GO

Jenna Jameson For Adidas
GO

Scenester Video With Tits of the Day
GO

More Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace Dressed Like a Hooker
GO

A Little Kirsten Dunst on the Street Action
GO

Pete Doherty is Cool
GO

Keira Knightly Has Mangled Feet
GO

Lookin’ Good Hairy Ass
GO

Last Nights Fetish Pics
GO

Nicole Richie and Her Boyfriend
GO

Girls Next Door Holly Get Naked for PETA
GO

Riding in Cars With Boys – Some Videos of Sluts in Cars Being Sluts
GO

This Video is Called Bikini Girls
GO

Sunny Leone Pictures
GO

Some Chick Named Dillian Naked
GO

Kylie Minogue is Scary
GO

This Video is Called Web Bad Girl
GO

Masturbating Walrus
GO

Sexy Video
GO

Pictures of the Complex Party I wasn’t Invited to.
GO

Censored Sapranos Isn’t Funny
GO

Lookin’ Good Moustache
GO

Hot Hipster Tit
GO

50 Cent on Throwing the Bitch In The Pool
GO

Photobucket Peeing
GO

Dripping Bikini Pic
GO

Photobucket Peeing
GO

This is What You Get When You Search Squirting
GO

Photobucket Panty Pose
GO

Photobucket Mooning
GO

Photobucket Big Tits
GO

Playboy’s April Coed
GO

Photobucket Panty Ass
GO

Violent Redneck Fight with Black Dudes
GO

Marisa Tomei’s Ass in Wet Shorts
GO

Photobucket Chick You’ll Want to Bang
GO

Photobucket Nudity
GO

What Rocky Win To Make You Feel Better About Yourself
GO

Nelly Furtado Gets Punked
GO

Topless Alessandra Amborsio
GO

Slutty Wicked Weasel Contributor
GO

Carmen Electra Photoshoot
GO

This Video is Called Dirty Foods and it’s Pretty Hot
GO

This Spray Will Get You Laid, Quit Holdin’ Out Unless You Are Gay
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

12

Apr

I am – Lohan Parties Like a Lesbian in Japan of the Day

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The word on the street and by street I mean Internet because I don’t get out much so it’s the street to me, is that Lohan is dyking out with some nasty looking celebrity DJ named Samantha Ronsen or some shit. I have heard of this bitch before and even messaged her dirty things on Myspace when I used to have it but I don’t remember much of those days, I blocked them out like a molested teenager because they were the low point in my internet career.

I have nothing wrong with party sluts dyking out, because watching 2 girls shower together is hot to me. It’s all pretty standard, bitch gets fucked over by dudes over and over again, has daddy issues and has pretty much fucked half of hollywood. Now she figures it’s time to explore the other side, and by other side I mean labia, so she jumps on the first bitch who looks like she has a dick that she can find.

Since Lohan is a party slut and banging the DJ is what party sluts do, the whole situation makes sense. All she had to do was get on a plane and surprise her lover at the party and she’s pretty much guaranteed some strap on dildo, double sided dildo, scissor position action. When Lohan is ready to get with dude’s who stink and have penises shaped like vagina, I’ll send in my application, if I am not too lazy, which is pretty unlikely and that’s how this post is going to end. Cuddles.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

12

Apr

I am – Hayden Panettiere is Playing of the Day

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These pictures are to remind you that lookin at this girl in a sexual way is kinda sleazy. She’s just a normal girl, doing normal things on set, like playing with the other kids. Pics of her simulating some lesbian shit made their rounds yesterday and figured this was a decent way to bring it all down a notch by making you feel guilty for jerking off to her….

I was talking to a girl about how I want to lose weight and get a bigger penis, she told me that it’s pretty much too late for me to start now and that dreams of porn dick are pretty useless considering nothing out there is proven to work. I don’t actually get hard anymore, like I tell you all the time, but there was a time that lasting relationships never happened for me, I used to think it was because the girls were hookers and just wanted my 50 dollars, but now I realize if I had a stacked dick, maybe they would have turned a few tricks for free, you know cuz they loved it so much.

I figured the best advice for you, since you have a small penis, is to find a girl with a shallow g-spot, one of those bitches with an abnormal vagina that can’t take much more than a pinky. Since that’s hard, you can just run after a girl who is about 4 ft tall, I’m talking midgets, then maybe you’ll fill her up to her belly button like you always wished you could.

That’s pretty much all I have to say about that and remember you’re the one reading this, meaning the issue isn’t with what I write about, it’s with you taking the time to really take in the shit I say. It’s all pretty embarrassing for you.

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|Unsorted

2007

12

Apr

I am – Justine Henin Cameltoe of the Day

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I was always more into inebriated girls. The kind that were so fucked up they didn’t know what they were doing or saying. Not because they were easy, but because they were funny to be around and were easy. Jock bitches are too concerned with winning to go out there and giver’ like a party girl flashing her tits, so I never really bothered with them.

This is Justine Henin doing some stretches and showing off her cameltoe, proving something I was never really sure about, and that is that jock bitches have vaginas. I saw the movie Ladybug when I was younger and just assumed that all women in sport were just dudes dressed up. Their rippling muscles and broad shoulders kinda brought that point home and if it is in fact the truth, this tennis bitch is doing a good selling job, I am pretty convinced that I am staring at her box…

I guess the other issue is that she has herpes on her lip, proving that she actually has sex, or oral sex, whether it be with dirty dudes or chicks she picks up in parks while in cities she’s playing in, you know to take off the pre-game edge or some shit, but it’s all speculation considering I have never heard of her before today.

All these observations go to prove that cameltoes answer some of life’s great mysteries, and they said dropping out of highschool meant the end of knowledge for me. Liars.

Posted in:Jocks|Unsorted

2007

12

Apr

I am – Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace Flashing While Out of the Day

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I spoke too soon. Once a slut always a slut. This bitch can’t get through a day without showing off her tits or box. I don’t really have much more to say about this, because I already wrote a post on these pictures here and I can only get inspired once and these tits aren’t doing it for me right now but I would be an asshole not to post them.

On a side note, not showering for 6 days in preparation of hitting the streets to panhandle has lead to a rash on my back, so if you’re reading this and taking my entrepreneurial lead in tax free money making, you may want to re-consider the approach.

Based on this slag’s herpes ridden chin, I can only assume slamming her raw dog would lead to a similar rash on your dick, but that’s an obvious joke that I shouldn’t have bothered writting. Lucky for you I don’t edit myself so you just got a taste of me sucking. It happens.

Posted in:Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace|Unsorted