So the story goes like this…a dude breaks into a hotel and tries to rob them and while knee deep in the robbery…he accidentally shoots himself in the fucking eye…only for his partner in crime to run the fuck away because why save your homie when he’s that fucking dumb and deserves to die…I mean his behavior’s gonna get one of them killed or caught…or a little bit of both…

The dude lived, even though he shouldn’t have.

If that’s not your thing, here’s a writer from Florida cutting off his earlobe and eating it for publicity…in what may be the weirdest publicity stunt ever.

Or maybe you prefer watching an Elephant wake up a dog…

Or maybe you prefer a cat on a windshield…

Or maybe you like seeing an army chick grabbing army cock after getting tased….

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This guy seems to have it all figured out…he’s pulling my favorite move that I usually save for the dance floor, only I have way more style, rhythm and grace, or at least I think I do because I am drunk and when drunk we are all good dancers….because my creeper brushing up against random girls happens on the dance floor…

This guy who is awkwardly standing behind chicks with a hand in my pocket bumping’ into their asses like this freak…is kinda funny, even if he deserves to get beat the fuck up…and really the only question I have, is who the camera man is….

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This Sam Jones chick is insane…

She has a Youtube series of her doing random things but this one is by far the best. She recruited some naked trainer from Craigslist, let him in her house, and shit is starting to get buzz around the internet, because it’s so fucking weird, awkward, but she handles herself so well through it…and if you don’t care about hearing her talk, you can always stare at her big tits in some leotard…doing fitness moves..cuz if you’re perverted enough, and you are, anything can be made pornographic…

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I am pretty sure this is the best thing that happened on the internet this year…I am not too sure it’s all that good for you and your sex life though…because being oddly turned on by this may fuck up masturbating to real porn, or even banging a regular hooker, unless she’s Nicolas Caged…not that you have sex…or have ever had sex…and your masturbation has ventured into far weirder, darker places…

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Nothing like some clever camera work to let us experience a motorbike ride from the right angle..

The only problem with all this is that I have seen one hot biker chick in my entire life….so I am not sure they actually exist, the one time I saw blonde hair flowing in the wind that I thought a biker bitch had potential, she turned out to be a he…and the rest of the biker babes I’ve seen have been fat and serious lesbian…the kind who use dolphin shaped dildos and probably wanted to rip my testicles off just because I had testicles…and penis is their biker bitch enemy…but that doesn’t mean I’m not gonna take every single bump she hits in….cuz the fact this video exists is funny to me.

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I don’t know what this video is all about but I have a feeling that you’re going to like staring at some girl who acknowledges her dyke hair arguing about how old you should be to fuck because she’s had her tits since she was 12….

It bored me, but I feel like she’s a beacon of hope to your pervert cause….

If you don’t like that – maybe you prefer seeing a girl getting her face smashed by cops…

Some Girl Arguing Age of Consent of the Day

I don’t know what this video is all about but I have a feeling that you’re going to like staring at some girl who acknowledges her dyke hair arguing about how old you should be to fuck because she’s had her tits since she was 12….

It bored me, but I feel like she’s a beacon of hope to your pervert cause….

If you don’t like that – maybe you prefer seeing a girl getting her face smashed by cops…

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Kids who find their whore mom’s dildo and think it is a toy…is amazing…but parents who film it are even more amazing…especially based on the fact that is a massive double sided dildo, not one of these dainty feminine classy dildos …but rather a nasty fleshy one she probably doesn’t wash very well…that you’d expect to find in some gutter homeless porn…You know she shoves that up in her and that may even be the reason she has that kid in the first place…because she is a whore who loves when her big vagina feels full…the kind of mom I wouldn’t mind stepfather the kids of….

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Who are these people, and why did they think this kind of prank was a good idea or a good initiation into the family? Are they part of some weird sex cult, or do they just think it is funny fuck with a dude who just married into the family, making him feel awkward every time he sees the mother in law, now that his hands have been up her skirt and he’s got hard for her, I mean ever single dude at one point or another imagines fucking their wife and their mother-in-law at the same time, it’s just part of masturbation and keeping the married life interesting, but no one really wants to put their hand up their mother-in-law’s skirt, at least not when she looks like this, or in front of a room full of people, I mean save that shit for Christmas vacation when your wife and her dad are out playing golf or some shit…you know when it’s one on one and special…

Either way, weird.

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