DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2019

18

Dec

Kelly Gale Fitness and Bikini Body of the Day

Kelly Gale is a Victoria’s Secret model…who you may or may not have heard of since Victoria’s Secret is dogshit and the only thing it really does for these girls who grew up dreaming about being Victoria’s Secret models because women as a whole a pretty basic, easy to market to and manipulate, proven in the fact that I have had sex before and that should have never happened, but women aren’t the brightest..

ANYWAY….the only benefit of being a VS model now that VS is a sinking ship is that she was still cast, still made money, and still can use the title to increases your profile to rich dudes who want to fuck Victoria’s Secret models cuz they are old, detached and busy and don’t realize that that Victoria’s Secret thing has sailed and that even when it was peaking with their marketing by using hot chicks…was still a lame fucking brand…

This is her fitness as she’s out here trying to find other work now that her DREAM is over….

Here she is in her bikini…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kelly Gale|SFW

2019

18

Dec

Samaire Armstrong Bra Top of the Day

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Samaire Armstrong is a Japanese born American Actress…which means that she likes being shit on while being a contestant on Japanese Game Show, or really any of the insane stunts they do on Japanese Game shows cuz that’s her culture bro.

Her dad teaches hand to hand combat to soldiers, so be careful what you say about this 40 year old in a bra for instagram promoting who fucking cares what…

I remember her for being the punky kind of girl that Seth dated when he was on a break with Rachel Bilson…and within my group of men who were too old to be watching The OC, but were watching the OC…we collectively found her hot.

I assume she’s done some other shit, but this bra top is most recent and most relevant for the sake of this site, I’m not LINKEDIN here, I don’t need to be posting her accomplishments when I’m just looking for the tit.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:Samaire Armstrong|SFW

2019

18

Dec

Edita Vilkeviciute for Lingerie of the Day

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Edita Vilkeviciute must be very fucking old by now, I feel like we’ve seen her masculine features offset by her huge tits for a really long time at this point, maybe as long as I’ve been running the site, which feels like forever, because it has been forever, and because nothing has really come from it, so I just sit here updating shit no one cares about, writing words no one cares about, that google doesn’t appreciate because I am not an indian coder who knows how to hack the google algorithm with properly written for google articles, and really I could be replaced with a script or a BOT and no one would know….it’d be like “INSERT CELEB NAME” is a whore, just look at her be a “whore”….doing “whore things” like a “whore”. This shoot is for “who the fuck cares”….look at her tits, if you can’t see tit, look at her ass, if you can’t see ass…write to the site admin as there has been a glitch in the auto-updater we paid 200 dollars to build so that the site admin can spend more time on his couch doing nothing…..

THAT SAID, like all women, they aren’t giving up, they keep bringing it, and it’s appropriate for this shoot, since it is a Victoria’s Secret collab with a hipster brand, just struggling to be relevant as they are dying off….while Edita is literally dying off…she must be at senior discount age by now…

FUN that grannys can still get half naked…

Posted in:Edita Vilkeviciute

2019

18

Dec

Carla Guetta in the Kitchen of the Day

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I know what you’re thinking, and that is that this CARLA GUETTA in the Kitchen is some HOTNESS…becasue women belong in the kitchen, at least according to the traditional gender roles you were brought up with, and even if you didn’t have that NUCLEAR family, and your mom was out there working the streets like the whore that she is, you would have liked her to be that stay at home mom you saw in the movies, but instead you saw her wither away for whatever unappreciative company she’d slave for, only to die prematurely….when if she got to relax and run the household like the QUEEN that she was….she’d still be with us today….if only she was in the Kitched where she belonged…instead of out there trying to get work and be equals to men…instead of being the prize men take care of…..in exchange for them taking care of the house…women have that distorted concept that taking care of your family as a full time job is a bad thing…or that it is repressive…when really it’s what keeps marriages happy, it is what establishes a mutual respect, men are coded to care for their home by providing for them and women are coded to take care of their family without having to worry about putting meat on the table…OUR SOCIETY was built on this…but now there’s a power dynamic, where nothing gets done, cuz women were bored of staying home and now want to sit in offices all day while their kids are out there snorting meth…get it together idiots.

ANYWAYS.. I assume this Carla Guetta is David Guetta’s daughter, since all the celebrity DJ millionaires are in their mid 40s and would have hot 20 year old daughters, but I guess she could also be his wife…..reminding us how hot it can be for a bitch to be in the kitchen…house-wifing-.

Posted in:Carla Guetta

2019

18

Dec

Noah Cyrus Slutty of the Day

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Noah Cyrus posted up some pics of her faking out a flash to show how wild she is…and no one cared…because she’s not Miley so no one cares…and even if she attempts to flash the world next to some overpriced classic car…she’s not even a close enough resemblance to MILEY CYRUS like the sister who went to space and looks like a CYRUS but a little off…she is just the sister with a genetic defect that would have been kept in the basement if she wasn’t from such a high profile family with a potential target on their heads that could get them arrested for keeping her in the basement…you know the baby that didn’t quite get all the nutrients it needed because the mom was too busy with their actual daughter back when she was pregnant and this one was sort of an STD that survived…

ANYWAY…flashing pics…so edgy.

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:noah cyrus|SFW

2019

18

Dec

Maja Krag Bikini Shoot of the Day

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Maja Krag is a Danish model, and if you know anything about me and my wife, we fucking love danish….not the mid century modern teak furniture…I’m not bougie…I’m more into Cheese Danish, to Strawberry Danish, to Chocolate Danish, to pretty much any Danish, just as long as it is a Danish, or really any baked good…because of obesity, diabetes, amputate my toes for FOOD addiction…..

My apprecaition for Danish goes beyond baked goods because apparently I am into this Maja Krag…enough to post her bikini pics..but then again, I post any bikini pics I come across with little or no thought because no one cares about what I have to say.

Posted in:Maja Krag|SFW

2019

18

Dec

Naked Man Bowled into Chairs at Company Xmas Party and Other Videos of the Day

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Tall Tranny Beats Little Dude

Eco Themed Christmas Carollers – Oh God

The Best Way to Spread Xmas Cheer

Cops Returning Package a Porch Pirate Took

Creepy Doll of the Day

Drunk Man Cling Wrapped to a Tree for XMAS

Man Dressed like Santa Gets Stabbed

Posted in:stepNEWS|Videos

2019

18

Dec

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

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I used to think girls to avoid on the internet dating sites have profiles that read “I LARPed for 8 years starting in my teens, Vampire the Masquerade. It was fun, I don’t regret doing it.” were the ones to avoid…but after digging through some reddit gone wild / reddit rate my nude body the other day…I found a girl who wrote just that…and who ended up having the gnarliest nerdy porn…with some of the biggest dildos up inside her….with some of the weirdest looking dudes pissing on her…and even a classified looking for men to fuck her while her nerd boyfriend watches…and filmed because I guess you evolve from LARPING…to being a weird couple in your weird apartment with weird “Dragon art” and other nerd shit like SWORDS and wooden masks and other nerd shit…. filming weird porn for your porn tube profile no one asked for…when you’re not working your day job at the fucking dollar store…

Tis the Christmas Season and besides goodwill towards men…give some goodwill to socially awkward, possibly autistic, half retard perverts filming their fucks….cuz nothing says Christmas better than showing your family what you’ve been up to now that you’re 35 and married and looking for excitement…by revealing your porn channel…with confidence…no shame…empowered to everyone sitting at your family dinner table that looks like Walmart Decor took a shit on it….cuz you’re trash….

Speaking of trash, Shop our GIFT GUIDE, it’s not trash…

Here are some links…in the morning…

Ram VS Swiss ball
CLICK HERE

Every Kardashian Christmas Card Ever
CLICK HERE

The World’s Most Expensive Airline Ticket
CLICK HERE

Billie Eilish on Shitting
CLICK HERE

The Patriots are Spying
CLICK HERE

Busty Draya Michele
CLICK HERE

Some Tree Humping
CLICK HERE

Adam Driver is a Bit of a Drama Queen
CLICK HERE

Kanye is Openign an Opera
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS

2019

17

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

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I was just out here getting into the christmas spirit by jerking off in my xxxl sweat pants behind this Liquor store Christmas tree decoration because I like the holidays just that much…

Some people call me a Christmas miracle, or the human embodiment of Christmas, that’s just that how Christmas I am….

I mean and because there was a group of young college girls in leggings one size too small buying supplies for cocktails for their Tuesday night holiday party cuz exams are over motherfuckers and it’s time to let loose…

I tried to approach them by offering to show them a picture of my PUG…girls love pugs…only to have the image opened up to a video of me jerking off in my sweat pants while looking at them….you know to let them see how REAL life works with REAL perverts not afraid of the backlash of being a pervert because I am a pervert and that is my right…I mean if people can dress like women and fight to get seen by a GYNECOLOGIST despite having a COCK….the vary thing GYNECOLOGISTS don’t deal in…I have the right to get turned on by hot chicks as a dude cuz I’m fucking human….

Stay safe, sex positive, pervert friendly this HOLIDAY season but above all this…drink yourself to near death…cuz I will….I am….

Here is the stepHOLIDAY Gift Guide…

Here are some stepLINKS….

Flying Tent Hits Soldier
CLICK HERE

Woman Freaking Out on Amusement Park Rides
CLICK HERE

Your Boy PewDiePie is Leavign Youtube
CLICK HERE

Some Police Brutality
CLICK HERE

Draya Michele is Busty
CLICK HERE

Denny’s Mosh Pit
CLICK HERE

Lily Rose Depp Slutty
CLICK HERE

Soldier Analyzes 11 Military Scenes
CLICK HERE

Cops VS Pedestrians
CLICK HERE

Restoration of Notre Dame Cathederal
CLICK HERE

Fat Ass balancing Act
CLICK HERE

The Best Pervert Tranny Story Ever
CLICK HERE

Useful Pie Charts
CLICK HERE

The Body Transformation that has made Everyone Mad
CLICK HERE

Marg Helgenberger Just Bought an Awesome House
CLICK HERE

Real Housewive’s Couple is Splitting
CLICK HERE

Russian Guy Means Business
CLICK HERE

Tiger Lily HUtchence in Panties
CLICK HERE

Megan Fox at an Event with her Tits Out
CLICK HERE

Kendall Jenner Leggings Wedgie…
CLICK HERE

HERPES MARIAH CAREY Hits Number 1
CLICK HERE

Netflix’s Gay Jesus is Making People Mad
CLICK HERE

Drunk Woman Makes Out with a Tree
CLICK HERE

Wrestling is REAL
CLICK HERE

Katy Perry is Busty
CLICK HERE

Gilbert Gottfried is the ONLY CAMEO you need to buy this Holiday
CLICK HERE

Top Adult Coloring Books…GREAT GIFT FOR GRANPA
CLICK HERE

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From the Forum

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BECKY G in SPANX
CLICK HERE

Sarah Hyland in a Sports Bra being Dramatic
CLICK HERE

Charlize THeron in a Dyke Outfit
CLICK HERE

Keri Russell in a Short Dress
CLICK HERE

Taylor Swift Side Tit at an Event – KINDA
CLICK HERE

Liz Olsen Looking Old as Shit
CLICK HERE

Florence PUGH booty in a TIght Dress
CLICK HERE

Julianne Hough Slutty Outfit for her Family Holiday Special Lameness that Shouldn’t Exist
CLICK HERE

THat Katy Perry Cleavage
CLICK HERE

Brie Larson is Shit…and This is her Cleavage Shit
CLICK HERE

===============
From stepSMUT!!

(LINKS BELOW ARE NSFW!)
===============

That Escalated Quickly
CLICK HERE

Squirt to the Face
CLICK HERE

Amateur SLUT
CLICK HERE

Blonde Girl Gets Roped into Porn..I guess…
CLICK HERE

Slutty See Through
CLICK HERE

Dubble Bubble
CLICK HERE

Tiffany Got her Titties Out
CLICK HERE

HOOKER OF THE YEAR
CLICK HERE

TORPEDO TITTIES
CLICK HERE

CUCK VIDEO of the Day
CLICK HERE

Dylan Voxx and her Big Tits
CLICK HERE

CUCKOLDING went WRONG
CLICK HERE

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

MORE LINKS – MORE LINKS – MORE LINKS – MORE LINKS –
CLICK HERE

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JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:stepLINKS

2019

17

Dec

Rita Ora Lingerie of the Day

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You may not quite know any Rita Ora music, but we can all agree that her amazing tits have done an amazing job being fucking everywhere, so that we all know the name Rita Ora, and assume she’s a celebrity because she’s been around so long, and the only real damaging she had to do for this celebrity is that we know of is fucking Rob Kardashian at his fattest, which is how she launched in America, and as you know the best way to launch anything in America is through Kardashians…because America is fucking weird and likes rich first generation weirdness…

POINT being…Rita Ora’s got great tits and even though NO ONE has ever heard her songs, despite her being a popstar, she’s still got great tits, and you can’t take that away from her unless you’re breast cancer…