DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

03

Nov

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

I don’t watch sports, but I did agree to watch the baseball game with my neighbor, even though out of all sports, baseball is the least interesting, and the entire time he was freaking out with “Oh My Gods”….and “Did you see that play”…and “this is the most exciting game ever”….making me realize that if I was to choose any game to torture myself through, it might as well be the most exciting one, but more importantly, realizing that the most exciting baseball game is as boring as I’d expect making me wonder what the least exciting game would look like…but not really…because unlike Bill Murray, I’m done with the sport…

The depressing thing in this story is that I had a 21 year old offer to sit on my face while I jerk off – and I was like “no babe, got baseball plans”…you know can’t always give these girls what they want…but let me repeat…she is a 21 year old girl…offering to sit on my face….and I chose baseball…which I guess this is what sports loving dude do everytime their fat wives want to cum…BUT the difference is this was a 21 year old…I repeat…a 21 year old….

Here are some stepLINKS….

Tanline Erotica
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Trick or Treating with a Fake Kid…
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How To Get Away With Murder in Yellowstone national Park
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It’s Bill Murray Winning the World Series…
CLICK HERE

Drunk Madonna Porn…
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f1 Pitt Stop Explained
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Gigi Hadid Thigh – Looking Skinny
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Jennifer Lawrence has Tits but You’ve Already See Them
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In Hooker News – Eliot Spitzer’s Hooker is Heading to Prison
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Jessica Simpson Dressed like Grease…
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Log Pile Art…
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How About the Evolution of Tom Cruise
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Party Fail Compilation
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Girls in Bed!
CLICK HERE

Posted in:stepLINKS

2016

02

Nov

stepLINKS of the Day

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Lesbians are always so angry – and they get really mad when you make reference to them being angry due to not getting enough cock…they find it misogynistic because it assumes that I think cock makes the world a better place, or that I think cock makes the world go round, when really I just think cock…not my cock…my cock isn’t substantial and dissapoints many…but a cock in general will make lesbians happier…if only they aren’t lesbians because their dad raped them…you know the cock fearing lesbians…who are actually usually the nicer lesbians with nothing to prove…

Either no one cares what I think…

Many Butt Pics
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Lohan’s New Accent is the BEst
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Hailey Baldwin Legs
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Some Famewhore Topless on the BEach
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Body Shaming has Made Hailee Steinfeld Less Fat and It’s Good
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Serena Williams in Costume…Event Though Everyday is a Costume Involving her Hiding her Dick
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Bill Murray Giving Away His World Series Ticket
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Cubs VS Indians Sluts
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Emma Watson – as Belle in Beauty and the Beast
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The Art of the Wrestling PROMO
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Ariel Winter – Shaved Walrus – Booty Flash
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Sara Underwood Keeps Bringing It
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Elsa Hosk – Hard Nipples
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Lady Gaga and her See Through Outfit
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Alicia Vikander Legs and BRa
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Whore Emily Sears in Costumes
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Jessica Biel Working
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Gemma Atkinson’s Hot Body in a Bikini by the Pool
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8 Dollar PASTA VS 100 DOLLAR PASTA
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Pam ANderson – ANti Uber
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Bella Hadid – Bra Top…
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Lily James Avoiding a Pussy Flash
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Charlie Sheen for the Indians
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Heidi Klum and Ellen
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Paris Hilton Lives
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Maitland Ward Huge Tits – Terrifying and Old in Costume
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Emma Watson Feminist in the Subway
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Madonna is Drunk and Out of Control
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Mexican Nissan VS AMerican Nissan Crash Test
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From stepSMUT!! LINKS BELOW ARE NSFW!
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My Kind of Girl…
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Cheesy Nude Chick of the Day
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Big Tits on a Car Ride
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Bathroom Vibes
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Sex in Some TV Show
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Sluts Just Trying to Pay The Bills By Not Working…
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Restaurant HEAD
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Porn Girls on Halloween
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Hot Naked Chick
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Crackhead HATES ANAL is Life
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SLUTS LOVE TAKING SO MANY Naked Selfies of the Day
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Find More Great Links Here….
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Sex Toy Video I Produced Of the Day
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2016

02

Nov

Lost Vegas by IMperial Pictures of the Day

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The best photographer in the game, doing the best stylized pictures that actually speak to my fucking soul, is Jonathan Leder.

He’s been at it long before instagram, he used to run a magazine that created celebrities like Ashley Smith…I know she’s not a celebrity…but because of him she looked good enough to eventually get into Sports Illustrated….I am sure that’s the last person he wants to talk about bringing up from TEXAS before losing her to TRUMP models….because there have been so many better shoots, with better people…and they all are exactly what I want out of a shoot.

He’s consistently produced amazing photoshoots – that actually feel more authentic, even if semi staged, than any of the shit being put out on instagram by all the poser, losers, who claim to be artists, with the thirsty fame seeking hookers looking for followers.

As far as I’m concerned, this is the real fucking deal…and every one of these photos makes me feel like I am on a fun adventure that I wasn’t invited on because no one like the fat guy masturbating in the corner…

These are from his new book “LOST VEGAS” – ORDER NOW

It’s pretty fucking hot…

ORDER NOW

Posted in:Lost Vegas

2016

02

Nov

Salma Hayek in GQ Mexico of the Day

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Salma Hayek may be old, washed up, boring….because she’s rich and has made it in America as a Mexican import who barely speaks english, unless that’s just part of her act, where she milks being a Mexican you want to milk, and wish was illegally working in your house cleaning and taking care of your kids for a dollar a day – so that you can Arnold Schwarzenegger her – but realize it’s a fantasy – because she’s not an illegal…and more importantly…because you don’t have a dollar a day to pay her if she was…sadness…

I guess she’s in some midlife crisis, or pulling out the old content she shot and never used, for GQ Mexico…in her second media blitz for Mexico in a day, maybe she’s running for President there…or maybe she’s got a new movie…or maybe she’s calling favors to get the attention she SEEKS…who knows…but good fucking job…reminding us why you exist…THEM TITS. Solid…yet so soft and juicy…like a ripe Mexican Avacado i want to stick my dick in….and fuck…because I am that dude you can’t leave rotting fruit around…I’ll just fuck it.

Posted in:Salma Hayek|SFW

2016

02

Nov

Caroline Vreeland for Lui Magazine of the Day

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Caroline Vreeland is some fat titty instagram leech who is based in LA, has huge fucking tits, is probably not even named Vreeland, but is riding some diluted family connection to one of the original fashion icons who worked in NY fashion, to use as an angle in trying to get ahead…when she’s not milking her “Bff”…instagram hooker “PEACE LOVE SHEA” who used to be a slutty instagram girl…before rebranding herself as fashion….getting invited to all the fashion events…because people are fucking idiots and believe anything..

So these are “it girls” at least amongst themselves in their LA plastic, bullshit, zero cool, disney commercial pop nonsense…that has no soul…but she’s playing a part to get a head and with that comes pulling out the fat tits…and we like fat tits…so keep up the good work…fat tits….doing the Em Rat Cow…because if you do it in LA…it seems to transcend across the world….

This shit is for LUI magazine…there are nude pics of her HERE

Posted in:Caroline Vreeland

2016

02

Nov

Zippora Seven Naked of the Day

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Zippora Seven is some hipster fashion nude model from New Zealand…because with a name like Zippora Seven you can assume that her Hippie parents weren’t too conservative about her running off and being naked, if anything they raised her on some commune…where everyone was naked…doing the cult life….at least that’s the impression she wants to give you…maybe her name isn’t even Zippora…and it’s all lies…which would make the most sense in this thirsty, trashy, dying for fans and likes world we live in….but at least she’s doing the “I have a bush, real tits and go to festivals in vintage panties” angle…and not the Kardashian sugar baby with fake faces angle…this is a better look….

From what I remember about her, is that she’s been getting naked as a model since she was 15 or 16…up on some TRACI LORDS shit, but for fashion not porn…and that it was for actual magazines not instagram accounts…so I feel her nipples are more authetic…more real…more deserving of being looked at…and not as desperate or lame as other nippples tend to be in this nipple for attention existence we live…

Posted in:Zippora Seven

2016

02

Nov

Emmy Rossum Sex Scene of the Day

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Emmy Rossum is the fucking worst and not just because she blocked me on social media, everyone blocks me on social media…but because she’s just a garbage celebrity who isn’t even that hot – but thinks she is…

I know, she gets naked, but it’s not even exciting…and seeing her fuck on Shameless – bores me…maybe when it first happened, back when it was the best thing that ever happened to her – in a time when she was just not hitting the mark or booking jobs – and this get naked and fuck for a TV show in an era where that’s the best thing that could happen to a career – since sex on TV, something I’ve been endorsing forever, has been the only thing people watch…giving her that ego she always had – but that was a little tarnished when it wasn’t working out for her…not that you care – you just want to see her fuck scene…you perverts with no standards or taste…I hate you.

Posted in:Emmy Rossum

2016

02

Nov

Kate Moss Does a Campaign of the Day

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Kate Moss is old, fat, beat up, likely STD ridden, from the last 30 years she’s survived as a rockstar fucking, partying, single mom living the life of luxury…as a top model…traveling the world in all the exclusive places and events all while looking like she crawled out of a very fashionable dumpster…and I’ve loved every thing about her from the minute I first saw her…she was just the rockstar, skinny girl, heroin chic goddess who acted like she didn’t give a fuck, because she probably didn’t give a fuck, she was getting paid and invited everywhere…just for being Kate Moss..and she’s still iconic…people still love her…and I just want to see more of her really long nipples.

I generally don’t love old, fat, beat up, likely STD ridden, from the last 30 years of living on a woman…I still fuck them if I can…or let them sit on m face..but the fact is that I don’t like women who are 30 years old…but this one is special…a survivor who still looks good to me….better than most…even in shitty shoots because she’s Kate Moss…

Here’s the video:

Posted in:Kate Moss|SFW

2016

02

Nov

Monster Hayley Hasselhoff Tits of the Day

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I am still not done with Halloween, but since it’s 50 percent off all the candy, I’ll give some discount bargain basement slutty halloween costume tits…not quite good enough to be retail price…but still tits.

In my glory days I once body shamed Hayley Hasselhoff because she’s a porker, fat as fuck, fully worthy of being body shamed, despite possibly being loved by her dad, a man who created a world with unrealistic female objectification, where she’d be laughed off the set, even with them big tits, provided she even made it on set…because he’d probably take a blowjob from her on the casting couch….and never call her back…that’s how girls built like this, when they don’t have that BAYWATCH trust fund….\

I guess what I’m saying is that I’m sure she’s a fucking disappointment everytime his superficial, vain, drunken ass looks at her….that’s the reason I never had kids was this fear that they’d be fat ugly trolls, I mean that and any girl willing to have my kid would be a monster with a whole lot of issues…I know every once in a while ugly people have good lookin’ babies, in some sort of Karma for always feeling like shit about yourself, and allowing you to feel proud of something, by having the prettiest girl in the school, but Karma’s never been too good to me, leading me to believe I’d end up with some kind of legless mutant that I’d be forced to drag around.

Based on these pictures, maybe David Hasselhoff shoulda had the same intuition because these girls belong back in the abortion clinic dumpster, the home they never got to visit because some asshole decided to let his wife keep them and take them away from a much better fate….but before they revisit…put them big tits in my mouth.

I’m so mean, she didn’t ask to deserve this…when wearing a see through shirt for the paparazzi – knowing they would take pics of her…oh right…she did.

TO SEE ALL THE CELEBS AT HALLOWEEN MEGA POST YOU PERVERT COSTUME FETISHISTS CLICK HERE

TO SEE ALL THE CELEBS AT HALLOWEEN MEGA POST YOU PERVERT COSTUME FETISHISTS CLICK HERE

TO SEE ALL THE CELEBS AT HALLOWEEN MEGA POST YOU PERVERT COSTUME FETISHISTS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Hayley Hasselhoff

2016

02

Nov

Emma Watson’s Cleavage for the Harry Potter Perverts of the Day

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Emma Watson creeps me out, partially because she’s not all that hot – yet is considered a massive and important star in the Hollywood system, with fans everywhere, but she mainly creeps me out because those fans are Harry Potter fans who have watched her grow up, playing their love interest in their favorite books, and feel some sort of connection to her.

I am convinced that when she was 12 and pre-pubescent, these creeps were all about her, maybe they weren’t jerking off to her at 12, but they were anticipating her turning 18, so that they could jerk off to…wondering how big her tits would grow after puberty (not very big) and other equally uncomfortable shit…

So whenever I see her either nude in movies, or at events showing some little cleavage because she’s got little tits, I think to myself…just how much cum has been spurted onto lonely, pathetic, sad bellies because of her…and it repulses me..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Emma Watson|SFW