DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2016

07

Jul

Marloes Horst Topless Photoshoot of the Day

Marloes Horst is a Victoria’s Secret model who by default is also a Titty model because models aren’t models unless they get topless these days and I guess that’s a good thing if you’re into tits like some kind of queer Titty fetishist…which I guess applies to all of us, women and men included thanks to breast feeding as a baby….getting hooked on or latched on before we knew how to do much…making it the responsiblity of women everywhere to show me their tits…my contact info is at the top of the site where it says contact…

Here she is not naked for playboy by david bellemere because playboy doesn’t do nudity you perverts – not at all – it’s ad friendly this way…

Posted in:Uncategorized

2016

07

Jul

Charlize Theron Making Out with her Phone of the Day

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Actors are theatrical to the point of being so fucking fake and obnoxious – and I guess a tormented soul from South Africa who was shipped out here in the 90s after her mother murdered her abuaiv me father- which I guess is normal South African Behavior at least if you ask the legless Olympian….

So a broke fatherless model imported to America where she was forced to make it or bust saw some hard times – did playboy in those hard times – looked amazing in those hard times and I guess impressed the guardian angel producer in those hard times because two decades later she’s an Oscar winner and her obnoxious casting couch antics can be saved for public FaceTime calls when the paparazzi is watching – we get it Charlize you’re a big personality with no dad…but millions of dollars. You won! You beat that statistic cuz your street hooker daddy issues are way more luxurious….

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Posted in:Uncategorized

2016

07

Jul

Ashley Benson in Miami of the Day

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Chubby Ashley Benson who is less chubby than she was but was an iconic figure in the youth culture scene because she’s on a hit show that targets them but also because her chubby body mimics theirs making her accessible and even more famous…

I know her from sex scenes in Springbreakers – a movie I like to think represented all that is wrong in the world with kids these days and their shitty rap music and bodies but I guess she’s done other things like this Snapchat from Miami zero erotic but people still care because our lives are pathetic….

Posted in:Ashley Benson|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Cindy Bruna Fashion Nipple of the Day

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Posted in:Cindy Bruna

2016

07

Jul

Paris Hilton’s Ass in a Dress of the Day

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Paris Hilton may be in her mid to late 30s but like any superficial Beverly Hills rich kid – she knows the value of looking good and staying skinny. It’s a superficial world and you are what you present yourself as which in Paris’ case is a sensationalized overrated dumb blonde with a sex tape who talks in baby talk to be cute who above all is not fat and willing to show you because it’s how she markets herself.

I am convinced she owns a percentage of Kim Kardashians empire because I’ve heard she’s a brilliant business person from a global hotel brand stock and not some bootleg sugar baby and lawyer daughter that is Kim K, and even if she’s not getting her 10-20 percent off the top, she’s still able to leverage that international brand name that is her last name for Arab men who pay her to go to their parties – it is status and probably a biohazard….at least in the pussy range…

She still looks good to me….

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Posted in:Paris Hilton|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Michelle Monaghan & Malin Akerman Bikini Jump of the Day

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I guess this is Malin Akerman and some chick named Michelle Monaghan decided to do a mutual Suicide jump like they were Asian students that didn’t get accepted to their school and couldn’t face being a disappointment to their family – only instead of dying – they are doing it in a fun and playful not very sexy but still in bikinis way….

I guess this could have ended in paralysis but instead it ended in her husband Chris Pratt’s nice pool that will be hers after the divorce as these things usually workout…

Posted in:Malin Akerman|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Joanna Krupa Dog Shit Erotica of the Day

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As much as I think picking up dog shit is the responsible thing to do in a city as a dog owner – I always find it amazing or funny or pointing and laughing worthy when I see hot diva looking girls do it…..you know I pick up my dog shit like the low level Mexican that I am…and as an obese men with no flexibility it’s pretty comedic…but when a vapid polish girl who could have been a housekeeper but instead because a sugar baby prostitute to a rich man – who wears designer clothes – the trashiest designer clothes but still designer clothes – and has a staff of Mexicans because that’s what these girls do – but I guess all that changes when your shitty show you were on for free because you positioned your prostituting “model” into relevant person…you’re forced to pick up your dog shit yourself.

Tough times, nice enough fake tits…they have done her well….but not that well because after all the glory we are both the same- shit picker uppers and late night downers to help us sleep with all this pain….

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Posted in:Joanna Krupa|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Carrie Underwood in a Bikini of the Day

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I would prefer the wholesome heartland singing country star who is recently divorced and / or remarried like a good Christian – not wearing a bikini.

I want to see the full body swimming suits the real Christians wear. All culty and Mormon….because I like my country music to be gospel from the 1920s, all sad and tormented during crop sharing depression before the dust bowl…and not white trash Stripper hick half naked…of the truck driving trailer park country music of today…:

But that’s just because I like seeing the hypocrisy in these God loving people in a less obvious way, you know commit to your Jesus loving lie even though we all know have you’re a white loving Slut who probably takes black dudes and pretends to be the plantation owner…wholesome white people are fucked….

Trick me like you tricked America…. But I guess bikinis aren’t bad….

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Posted in:Carrie Underwood|SFW

2016

07

Jul

Nadeea Volianova Fame Whore Photoshoot of the Day

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Nadeea Volianova is some low level fame whore with a music video – who in the past I would have possibly laughed at the shamelessness of her low level antics in an attempt to make noise and get famous…

But we live in a world of fame whores trying to get as famous as possible, so we are bombarded with fake photoshoots that either have what the idiot producing the shoot thinks is high concept or just shitty shameless ideas and I’ve got used to seeing it daily from immigrants to Hollywood actors to the girls down the street – they all do the same nonsense..

And for some reason it makes me appreciate the real low levels with their shitty themed shoot because it shows how out of touch they are with their shamelessness – like a clueless Stripper with no idea what is going on or what is a good photoshoot…and I find that more authentic than all the other bullshit

So Russian Nadeea Volianova doing this – whatever it is – is perfectly awful….

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To see her naked in feces look at this pic…..

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My kind of girl…

Posted in:Nadeea Volianova

2016

07

Jul

Hea Deville See Through of the Day

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I don’t know who Hea Deville is. I know that I say that about all of these whores, who are interchangeable and only separated by their tit size, age and hair color but are essentially the same thing on the same quest to be a celebrated in front of the camera personality…. But this one I actually googled only to discover she was in the hit film I never heard of called Lolo or maybe it was Lola, I closed my browser and can’t be bothered to look again and I guess that’s been her most important work, besides see through shirts in places she knows the paparazzi are at to ensure getting noticed. Good girl.

Posted in:Hea Deville