When I think of Paris an comebacks a very different image than an actual concert comes to mind….

I don’t keep track of Paris Hilton but I figure any excuse to re-watch her sex tape is a good one. It may be a little bit of a medicated, zombie-like fuck with a skinny bitch who talks in baby talk, but it’s also an iconic moment in pop culture.

She wasn’t the first person to do the sex tape, she was just the first person to do the sex tape properly, where it actually launched her career as an “influencer” before influencers existed, instead of just being some socialite trust fund bitch.

I am convinced that she’s the brains behind the Kardashians and that the Kardashians pay her out every year after she created them, but even if she’s not, they only exist because
Paris Hilton pulled her cunt out first.

Paris was everywhere in the 2000s, then she was non existent during the 2010s, maybe doing lame DJ gigs and still printing money, but not in our face with her “That’s Hot” half retarded speak she made famous….

For whatever reason, ego probably, I mean she’s got money, her husband’s got money, her family’s got money, so it’s not about the money, even though people with money like more money….she’s decided to be the pop star she has seemingly always wanted to be, bringing back her viral song of 15 years ago, doing a whole produced live show.

It could be a mid-life crisis, maybe the technology is good enough now to make her sing better than she previously could, maybe she is AI or transgender but it could be a never too late to live your dream when you’re rich and famous, it could be an inspiring thing for all the old fucks out there with a dream, it could just be a marketing scheme, but ultimately, she’s still skinny with her tits out and without Paris Hilton, I don’t think the internet would be as fun or as full of trashy whores with sex tapes and a dream….

Here’s a round-up of what went down, what is being celebrated with the tits out and she’s looking alright for 45 years old. Thanks science and whoredom parasites.

Posted in:Paris Hilton