DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

07

Jul

Abbey Lee Kershaw in AMAZING Bush Filled Artistic Nudes of the Day

The photogpraher’s name is Cara Stricker, VISIT HER SITE HERE

The model, Abbey Lee Kershaw….and in case you didn’t know, Abbey Lee Kershaw is a massive model. She’s not just some free spirited hipster taking pics for a photographer because she has nothing better to do, is in need of instagram pics, and figures being a model, even when not getting paid, is awesome…because it makes working the coffee shop seem more legit…like as if it is just temporary…

Abbey Lee Kershaw has done serious fucking campaigns, we’re talking real deal model, so seeing her fully naked, running though the fields at a country house, even showing some asshole, is blowing me away..

I also am sucked in by the bush, because I love bush, and I am happy that thanks to girls like this, you know actual hot girls, bush is making a comeback, because I hated when it was gone…it’s erotic as it gets…

It makes me want to be at this shoot, either masturbating in the corner or chasing Abbey Lee through the woods playfully before being killed by an Axe Murderer – on some Blair Witch Project shit…

Either way, this is the kind of photograph I like…

Pics via the amazing Cara Stricker HERE

Posted in:Abbey Lee Kershaw

2014

07

Jul

Miley Cyrus and Her New Tattoo Fashion Show of the Day

No Comments »

Miley Cyrus tricked her friends into getting matching tattoos as her…because when you are Miley Cyrus, you can make anyone in your inner circle do anything, because they fear being ousted by her and replaced with some other suck up loser who is just so happy to be friends with Miley Cyrus, because she’s a huge star, and by association, that makes them a huge star, I mean and even if it doesn’t it still gets them lots of instagram followers, and great instagram opportunities, like of the private jets they fly on, backstage and in the hotel room, all expenses paid to party with her, and all you have to do is what she says, like permanently branding her dog on your tit…

I mean you’d probably do the same thing if it meant staying in hotels you don’t pay for, instead of the trailer park you call home…it’s a small trade off, unless you’re like me and you find everything Miley, except for maybe pics of Miley, totally intolerable…

Posted in:Miley Cyrus

2014

07

Jul

Fat Cameron and Fat Madden Brother on the Beach of the Day

No Comments »

I haven’t laughed at a paparazzi pic in a really long time, I generally find the repetitive and boring, of people I don’t care about, and who I actually think are fucking awful and polluting society, but I guess there’s still a way for the paparazzi to into my heart…at least that’s what these pics of Cameron Diaz on the beach with one of the Good Charlotte Sisters, who she is Dating, because she’s run through every dude in Hollywood, and this motherfucker was the last in line for that bukkake party….and she looks fucking massive, overpowering him like some big clunky model in menopause, that I guess she is…

It amazes me that she books roles as the hot chick still, I mean she’s at the point in her life…where it is time to one-piece…

Either, this Picture makes me laugh more than the herpes I know they both have…

I mean this should be a scene in her next shitty ROMCOM….called Big Girl Who Once Was A Babe in Every Movie on Washed up Pop-Rockstar with shitty tattoos…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Cameron Diaz

2014

07

Jul

Jessica Alba in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

I get in trouble for calling girls hookers..apparently calling a girl a hooker is libellous and they can turn around and sue you, unless you have proof that they exchange money for using their body to hustle…you know sell your soul for money…which I like to think that Jessica Alba does, because on the spectrum of Hooker…this is proof she’s on it..

Now she’s a Mexican, I don’t really think she knows the magnitude of anything she does, I think she’s got management that position her, and that throw money at her, thinking “she’s a mom, let’s start an organic product line called honest, because no one will think we are dishonest, when honest is in the name”….and “we’ll get her to post in bikinis, holding the bottle, and other moms who grew up on her will buy”…and I guess they do..

People love this shit, and when looking at her in a bikini, she’s a mom of two, great body, but not the talentless filler needed to make a shitty movie a hit dudes jerk off to..not mention she didn’t ever get naked….making this Honest hustle, a way better scam for her…and I guess also of us….

Posted in:Jessica Alba

2014

07

Jul

Megan Fox VS Nicola Peltz Bathrobe Selfie WARS of the Day

No Comments »

Megan Fox got Instagram this week and apparently, that’s a big deal, because people are actually talking about it like it matters…and more importantly, she’s already got 200,000 followers…because she’s Megan Fox…but I just thought it was funny that Instagram, an app everyone uses, so Megan Fox being late to the party, just tells me how much of an idiot she actually is is something people talk about.

I am more into the fact that Nicola Peltz, the new Megan Fox in Transformers who Megan Fox definitely hates, judges and all that typical girl shit, posted a Bathrobe Selfie, and then Megan Fox did the same, in some catty girl shit, you can assume the Marketing Team at transformers is paying for…

Posted in:Megan Fox

2014

07

Jul

Karrueche Tran’s Ass for Chris Brown’s Instagram of the Day

No Comments »

Chris Brown posted this picture of his girl Karrueche Tran in a thong…and I guess it is safe to say, she’s either the kind of girl who likes the attention, that’s why she’s dating Chris Brown in the first place…or the kind of girl who knows that if she doesn’t do what Chris Brown tells her…she’ll regret it…

Now, I’m no Chris Brown expert, but I have been told be numerous people who know him, that he is actually a good dude, a nice guy and that the Rihanna thing was actually Rihanna beating the fuck out of herself, calling the cops saying he did it, and I don’t know how true that is, but I do know crazy girls exist, and I also know that Chris Brown beating her took her career to new heights…I also trust nothing that happens in Hollywood, it’s a plastic place filled with lies, but I do trust an ass in a thong….

Posted in:Karrueche Tran

2014

07

Jul

Hilary Duff Has Horrible Scientology Bikini Pics of the Day

No Comments »

If you’re interested in knowing what a Scientology bikini party looks like, here’s Hilary Duff with all her Scientology friends in bikinis…

I’m thinking it is not gay enough, or autistic enough…but that’s probably because scientology doesn’t acknowledge autism or homosexuality, just ask Handjob Travolta and his dead Austic kid…who wasn’t autistic according to him…

The party is missing some camel toe…

Posted in:Hilary Duff

2014

07

Jul

Emmy Rossum in a White Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

One solid way to make a low level actor’s bikini pic seem really unimportant is to watch her SEX SCENE FROM TV …because it is a sex scene…and not a girl in a bikini..

That’s something I’ll never really understand when it comes to the internet, it’s like why do I care if a girl is in her bikini, if I can just google her vag…Not that Emmy Rossum Vag is a Vag I’d google, but you get what I am saying…and that is that this pic doesn’t matter..

Posted in:Emmy Rossum

2014

07

Jul

Ashley Benson Cleavage Pics of the Day

No Comments »

Ashley Benson is a solid 10-15 pounds overweight and the average fan or follower of hers would probably not call her fat, mainly because they are American, and fat has a whole different meaning, but I know that she knows she’s got some diet and workout and ephedrine pills to do to power through this…but in the meantime, do what the fat girls of the internet everywhere do…and that’s show some titty, because cleavage is the best distraction from GUT…

I am just surprised that with her resources, and the fact that she booked a movie that she wore a bikini 90 percent of the time, she’d be built like a pot smoking all night pizza eater…which I guess you’d want in a college chick in the apartment next door you bang when you’re drunk, but not a celebrity.

Either way, here she is pulling “fat girl trying to be sexy moves” on instagram.

Posted in:Ashley Benson

2014

07

Jul

Paris Hilton’s Bikini Party of the Day

No Comments »

I’ve heard so many stories about Paris Hilton VS Cocaine and the Paris Hilton winning, kind of like the stories of Paris Hilton’s Herpes vs Condoms and the Herpes always winning, not that she uses condoms…

I’ve also heard that Paris Hilton, despite seeming like a vapid idiot who loves drugs and sex, like everyone else, she’s actually a genius, and everything she does is strategic, since her family has a name, but the money you’d think she has, she went out and made it on her own…She leveraged her situation and got rich, by pretending to be a little rich bitch and that in and of itself, was a great scam that we can’t hate her for..

I mean she’s been around since I started the site and she’s still got a great fucking body, so despite hating everything about her or at least everything about what we know of her, I’d let her ride my face like a mechanical bull…

Here’s her bikini party from instagram.

CLICK THE LINKS TO SEE HER IN HER BLACK BIKINI HERE and WHITE BIKINI HERE

Posted in:Paris Hilton