DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2014

24

Mar

Cora Keegan Naked for Fashion of the Day

Cora Keegan is amazing…she’s one of those hipster models who probably is so hipster she hates being called a hipster because hipsters are so mainstream….but she’s got a bush and has a willingness to show her tits in photoshoots that I can’t imagine she got paid for but because she had nothing better to do since models only work a day a fucking month..

All this to say, I’ve been writing her love poems, love songs and I don’t even sing, I’ve carved her name into my thigh and sent her pics of what she does to me, she’s just that good…so these titty pics may not be her best work, but they involve her and that makes them better than anything else…

Cora Keegan, if that’s your real name…I miss us.

Posted in:Cora Keegan

2014

24

Mar

Heidi Klum is Old and Amazing in a Bikini of the Day

No Comments »

Heidi Klum was in the Ocean with one of her 30 kids she had with Seal in their 5 years of a lot of twisted german shit filled bondage sex…and at 50 or whatever age she is…she looks fucking amazing…

I have no choice but to think this is a product of hilter’s Nazi regime science experiments that involved creating the master human…because she just doesn’t make fucking sense…

Normally, I only want to fuck over 50 year olds because I’m changing their diapers at the home and I’m wrist deep in them…but this grandma’s got it going on…and I’d eat her baking everyday…even if that cookie’s been tainted and burnt thanks to blackness….

To See Her Nipples That Fell Out of Her Bikini While Herding her African Safari CLICK HERE

Posted in:Heidi Klum

2014

24

Mar

Naya Rivera Keeps the Implants Coming of the Day

No Comments »

Last week I posted Naya Rivera’s big implant tits in a bikini with her fiancé Big Sean….not because I like Glee and am part of the fan club, if anything I find it the devil’s work, and I was just happy to see some element of humanity or edginess in their cast, because you know all actors will do any role that pays, and that Naya wasn’t some good little church girl at the casting for Glee, but rather borderline willing to do porn if it meant making her famous, only to get cast of that Pleasantville shit, that has now type cast her….so tits and black rapper husbands in her personal life…is good strategy…

I just don’t know why they are denying her fake tits, or way she’s trying to downplay them in this top that girls with natural tits just don’t wear…not that Nay Rivera matters.

Posted in:Naya Reviera

2014

24

Mar

Doutzen Kroes No Make-Up of the Day

No Comments »

There was some scandal or hype or whatever about Victoria’s Secret model, who is probably best known for getting knocked up by a Black DJ, Doutzen Kroes, posting the above pic of her with no make-up on…to remind the world that models are a blank canvas for make-up artists and photographers with great cameras, lenses and lighting to maximize their “lines” and features and make them into the babes you think they are…SMOKE AND MIRRORS

I guess she’s doing it as a public service announcement for all the eating disorders she has likely caused being affiliated with the evil empire Victoria’s Secret…

But the funny thing in all of it is that within a few hours, she posted a bikini pic, just to remind everyone that no one gives a fuck about her face, her career is based on this mom body….

Posted in:Doutzen Kroes

2014

24

Mar

Kaley Cuoco Paying Tennis of the Day

No Comments »

This is the kind of tennis match that would probably be better ending with a Monica Seles inspired stabbing…

I don’t know why I hate Kaley Cuoco. I don’t watch the show she’s on, I don’t follow her life, and I don’t really care if she’s been the hot chick amongst the nerds so that she now thinks she’s the hot chick amongst the hot chicks…coupled with getting paid big money to be on the show..

There’s just something about her face, and the fact that she killed John Ritter, that I can’t get over…

That said, here she is playing tennis, one of the only sports I watch because I am classy, but more importantly cuz I like looking up skirts and hearing girls grunt…sexually…

To See the Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Kaley Cuoco

2014

24

Mar

Aubrey O’Day Proves I Hate Fat Chicks of the Day

No Comments »

I didn’t care fror Aubrey O’Day when she was fucking Diddy on her Danity Kane TV show, she just didn’t appeal to me, she was built more for a hip hop crowd, and I don’t mean white suburban kids, if you know what I mean…

Then the bitch got on another show, and was the fucking worst, all fat and cocky, a combination I hate in fat girls who don’t realize they are fat…It’s like being able to eat a buffet dessert cart is nothing to have an ego about pig…and your anger towards yourself being brought onto us in Diva behavior just doesn’t work…you need to be hot for that bitch…

So when she was fat…I hated her…now I think she’s great….I guess the only thing between me and love is 40 pounds…

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day

2014

24

Mar

Road Rage of the DAy

No Comments »

Apparently the dude in the shitty car didn’t like how the dude in the muscle car was looking at him so he pulled some out of a movie shit and got in the dudes face…only to get arrested in what may be some of the better road rage of the weekend, because what better way to start a monday that good old fashion road rage….but I’m more into the below video of a crazed bus driver who doesn’t fuck around…when people question his bus driving skills and instead of getting them to their stop safely, he slams the fucking breaks on them…asshole.

Posted in:Videos

2014

24

Mar

Cheesy Glamour Model Shoot of the Day

No Comments »

Her name is Sabine Jemeljanova and she was some UK Glamour model who got a lot of love for showing her tits in magazines for probably very little money, but the perks were that she got paid to go to events or more importantly, that she got to meet rich men who would pay her for dates…all in hopes that it would lead to better things…all while being better than being a stripper…only to end up being paid 500 bucks to do Latex fetish modelling in some of the cheesiest fucking pics ever….but you know…tits are tits and a girl willing to show her tits shouldn’t be discriminated against or alienated by how low level her titty campaign is…

Posted in:Sabine Jemeljanova

2014

24

Mar

Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis on Kiss Cam Making Babies of the Day

No Comments »

Here’s a video of Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis not showing you how they knocked her up, a story that is upsetting so many Mila Kunis fans, who I guess forget she spent close to a decade with a crackhead Culkin, who despite not being the devil, like Ashton Kutcher is, but clearly a way more offensive choice…not to mention, Mila Kunis is old now, she barely exists, you will never meet her…so move the fuck on.

I mean they started out in Hollywood together, were on a hit show together got rich together and played boyfriend and girlfriend on TV together, when they were probably fucking between takes….

If anything, this Hollywood “union” is one of the only one that makes sense…the only real bummer in all this is that Ashton Kutcher is reproducing, because he’s one annoying fuck you would hope his genetic line got cut short…but whatever…Kiss Cam..it’s about the Kiss Cam…

Posted in:Mila Kunis

2014

24

Mar

Morning Hangover Dump of the Day

No Comments »

TINDER is suddenly less romantic when you find out that you’re number 20 of the month for the girl you just met who you begged you to cum inside her…and here I was thinking TINDER was the next great American love story..

Here are some stepLINKS

Today in Big Titties
GO

Top 10 Worst Vogue Covers of All Time
GO

Amber Heard and Johnny Depp are Weirdos
GO

Mila Kunis is Pregnant
GO

Alessandra Ambrosio Doing some Pilates
GO

London Super Comic Con
GO

14 Worst Ad Placements Ever
GO

Find Cougars to Fuck
GO

Little Kid Recites All The Bad Words He Knows….
http://www.collegehumor.com/embed/6960358/little-kid-recites-all-the-bad-words-he-knows”target=”_blank”rel=”nofollow”> GO

Top 10 GIrls on Cam Right Now
GO

20 90s Movies Songs
GO

Posted in:stepLINKS