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Kendall Jenner’s Asshole Behind Thong of the Day

Dakota Johnson Not Fanning on a Slutty Hike of the Day

Leni Klum or her Friend has Her Ass Out in Tight Shorts of the Day

Christina Hendricks Still has her Tits of the Day

Anna Paulina Luna in her Bathing Suit of the Day

2010

Dec

Francesca Versace in her Bikini of the Day

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Her name is Francesca Verasace. Her dad is the non-gay business mind behind the billion dollar a year brand Versace. He was the one who rode her uncle’s talents, while her uncle was getting doin’ his own riding with his ass in Miami when he wasn’t getting murdered….

So she’s rich, she’s decent looking, she has access to model pussy and exclusive cocaine filled fashion parties, and her big round Itlian ass in a bikini is pretty amazing, making me the unofficial president of her fan club.

Posted in:Francesca Versace

2010

Dec

Nicole Scherzinger’s Tits of the Day

2 Comments »

She’s not hot, but she has tits and with a face like whatever the fuck this is, you’d probably buy yourself a set of tits too, becuase let’s face it, we’ve seen what modern technology did for the bitch who got a face transplant after being ripped apart by a chimp, and that shit, no matter how much Oprah dabs the dripping wound, didn’t work out so well.

I do not think a bitch should ever be rewarded for her fake tits, because anyone can get a set of tits, even college dudes with a lot of money making a bet, but I do sometimes give a haggard, hard faced bitch 10 dollars a song or less if I negotiate properly or she’s desperate enough, so let’s just think this is one of those weak moments where I just can’t make better choices for myself cuz I’m mesmorized by female skin. She is a female right?

Posted in:Nicole Scherzinger

2010

Dec

Brooke Hogan and Her Trashy Mom In Florida of the Day

3 Comments »

Nothing really needs to be said about how white trash the Hogan’s are and really what does anyone really expect, cuz raising your kids in Florida is bad enough, throwing in a superstar wrestler from a backwoods trailer park who likes young pussy his sperm made and his stripper wife as parents, give them millions of dollars, and this weirdness happens. Sometimes, pictures are enough.

I haven’t been to Florida since the late 80s and it seems like nothing has really changed from the time spent at the topless donut shop and walking the neon, implant, mullet, crazy pant filled beach. It’s like some white trash time warp and I am confused…

What’s weirder is that Hulk is jerking off to these as you read this post…this is his number 1 fantasy…this is his porn….not that you’re reading this post…but I’m writing it assuming you are…cuz it gives me purpose.

Posted in:Brooke Hogan

2010

Dec

Halle Berry in Black Face of the Day

1 Comment »

I know black people. I hang out with black people. There is no way that Halle Berry is not making this face in response to people like me who have been questionning her blackness.

Yeah, I’ve heard her bullshit speech in interviews where she pretends she’s black cuz her skin is not enitrely white, leading to an identity crisis and real understanding of the black plight, despite being the kind of black girl who crosses the street at night walking towards a group of black people.

I blame her white mom for getting knocked up by a brother who didn’t leave his name or number, her white suburban upbringing, white schooling, white friends, her white husbands, her white bank account….

So she can suck her lips like the best dude from the Islands after eating fried chicken and hot sauce with the best of them, the only thing black about her is the lie that the media companies thought she could pull off cuz they were in need of a black woman to win an academy award without actually hiring one…cuz other ethnicities make them nervous…or some shit.

She does have nice tits though.

Posted in:Halle Berry

2010

Dec

Emma Stone is Not a Lesbian of the Day

2 Comments »

I like these young starlets enough to wait around for their bikini pics to hit so that I can post them on this site…but I generally have a hard time remembering which one is which…and I heard pussy in Zombieland came out as a dyke , I was hoping it was Little Miss Sunshine cuz that would have been funny…but it turned out it was the one who plays Mark Zuckerberg’s neighbor for a few minutes.

Clearly, she is trying to get noticed by pulling a Lohan, even though everyone knows lesbians don’t exist and the only girls who are lesbians are built like dudes and dress like dudes, the only hot dykes are chicks who were molested by dudes enough growing up to fear dick….or who are easily influenced and manipulated by the girls built like dudes through friendship to “try it out” cuz “guys are jerks” and “i’m your best friend, trust me it feels good”…not that it matters,

Cuz this is Emma Stone and she is the only Zombieland pussy worth noticing today…and she’s not using cheap or bottom-feeding stunts like pulling the “I’m a lesbian, talk about me” card like she’s fucking Anne Heche…..

I hate publicity stunts…unless they come with video footage of the bullshit….which hasn’t happened in this PR strategy yet….

Here is Emma Ston at some event cuz I wannna fuck her…

Posted in:Emma Stone

2010

Dec

Lingerie Company’s Weird Web Campaign of the Day

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I like tits and since I can’t land a fucking advertiser for this garbage website I spend my days writing, I figured I’d write about bullshit ad campaigns these corporations who are trying to take over the internet are running in efforts to be “Viral”.

This one is for Canadian lingerie company called La Senza and they’ve created some Christmas piano the makes sounds of moaning pussy in lingerie, something I’ve tried to recreate in my basement, much to the three girl’s I kidnapped disappointment….

I don’t know what that means, but here’s some viral bullshit campaign for you to jerk off to.

These fuckers should be paying me. But they aren’t. I’m too porno for a fucking panyt company. Fucking mooching Assholes.

To See The Ad Campaign – Follow This Link
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Posted in:Viral Ads

2010

Dec

The Worst Internet Auction Ever of the DAy

11 Comments »

Loney fat bitches who work as Morticians and Nail Technicians who say shit like “His Loss” when referencing their last boyfriend who escaped them, and who think posting ads on eBay to find a date to go on a family cruise is normal, is just what I want to stay the fuck away from when it comes to spending my money on Valentines Day…

The only thing this is good for is amazing fucking content…If my 2 dollar bid won this shit….I’d definitely bring my video camera

Here is her ad, with her insane demands and restrictions, even though the only person who would waste their time on this shit, would break all those restrictions.

She’s a real fucking keeper/winner, I mean isn’t that what this eBay ad is screaming…I don’t know about you but I don’t see red flags and my cock isn’t scared he’s gonna be cut off, even though she’s clearly dying for cock…weird.

This auction is for a 1 ticket- 7 day cruise on the Southern Caribbean Princess Explorer with a female companion
**SERIOUS RESTRICTIONS APPLY**

CRUISE INFORMATION:
Departs February 13, 2011 from San Juan Puerto Rico
Returns February 20, 2011

Island Destinations: St. Thomas, Dominica, Grenada, Bonaire and Aruba
Oceanview room, meals and non-alcoholic beverages included

Some of the Money from this auction will go towards island excursions and other activities.

THE STORY: I’m 33 years old, my boyfriend and i broke up (his loss). i’m now looking for a travel companion / friend to enjoy valentines week with. i enjoy and anticipate dancing, snorkeling and other activities provided by the cruise line and hope to find someone that would enjoy the same.

RESTRICTIONS:
Bidder/Winner must submit a photo, complete name and comply to a background check.
Bidder/Winner must have their own passport.
Bidder/Winner must have previously cruised before
Bidder/Winner must be between the ages of 27 and 38.
Bidder/Winner must not be currently married or in a relationship.
Bidder/Winner must be willing to participate in active shore excursions.
Bidder/Winner must have clean hygiene and respect personal boundaries at all times.
Bidder/Winner must maintain self control and have respect.
Bidder/Winner must be of good moral character, must not be a felon.
Bidder/Winner must not be a smoker, social drinking is okay.
Bidder/Winner is responsible for their own flight to and from puerto rico.
Bidder/Winner is responsible for their own alcoholic beverages and all other fees not included with the cruise ticket above.
Bidder/Winner must have similar qualities or interests to me (see about me section below)
THIS CRUISE WILL BE ACCOMPANIED BY MY PARENTS, THERE WILL BE NOTHING OF ANY SEXUAL NATURE TO TRANSPIRE!
IF BIDDER/WINNER DOES NOT COMPLY, AUCTION IS IMMEDIATELY DISQUALIFIED AND THERE WILL BE NO REFUNDS.

ABOUT ME: i’m 33, i work 2 full time jobs. i’m a mortician and a nail technician, i really enjoy doing nails. i have a bachelors degree in science. i like movies, horror, action, some comedy. i like a huge variety of music but stay away from mainstream music and do not like country music. i like anything from Connie Francis to skinny puppy. i am ambitious, goal-oriented, honest, eager to live and experience life. Feel free to ask questions, i will respond as fast as i can. i’m 5ft 5 in. athletic but curvy. i do not use recreational drugs nor smoke. i am a social drinker

Payments are due 3 days from auction close payment in form of Paypal. Thanks for Looking & Good Luck bidding Buyers automatically enter into a legally binding contract to purchase the item from the seller if they win the auction-style listing or use the Buy It Now feature. eBay’s Unpaid Item policy requires buyers to pay for the items that they commit to purchase. eBay will take action against buyers who do not pay for items they have won.

Weird. Yet hilarious. No body shots…obviously…

To See Her Insane eBay Ad, Follow This Link
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Posted in:ebay Auction

2010

Dec

Pirelli Calendar Behind the Scenes Tits of the Day

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I like tits. I don’t really like the artistic vision behind a calendar people only know about because of the tits. I don’t really need a behind the scenes on the shit and I didn’t really watch more than 4 minutes of the shit, but that doesn’t mean you won’t draw inspiration from this, inspiration for what, I’m not quite sure, but I am sure I’m glad to be left out of the loop on this one, cuz knowing I may aid some of you in jerking off makes me question my sexuality, luckily some of these models bring it back home.

To See The Pics – Follow This Link
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Posted in:Pirelli Calendar 2011

2010

Dec

Kid Wonder is the Unsigned Hype of the Day

12 Comments »

I met this 17 year old kid the other week at my friend and his busty partner at Wolf & Harrison’s Holiday Photoshoot . I got real drunk partially thanks to the free alochol they were handing out but mainly because I was drinking my feelings away cuz they told me they didn’t want me in their shoot.

They put on his demo CD and next thing you know I’m dirty dancing with myself…cuz girls don’t like me…..he gave me his myspace and I came across it today and I’ve been listening to it on repeat….

I don’t normally post on weekends, I don’t normally promote 17 year old rappers, but I’m hungover and can’t get off the couch and figure I might as well try to make talented kids with passion who are actually doin’ something as famous as I can, you know since I’ve got no talent or passion, except maybe when it come to vagina…but that doesn’t count.

He goes by the name Kid Wonder. Let’s get him a record deal.

To Listen to the Song I’m Hooked On – Follow this Link
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Posted in:Kid Wonder

2010

Dec

stepLINKS of the Day

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It’s the weekend, what the fuck are you doing on the internet, you should be at the mall hiding under the staires watching hot pussy christmas shop, literally….Loser….

Add Me As a Friend on Facebook…Loser…
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Here are our stepLINKS…Loser….

Hot Victoria’s Secret Ad by Michael Bay
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Nativity Scenes Are Lame Unless They Are Made of Bacon and Sausage Like This One Is
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Start your holiday shopping now….
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Kim Kardashian Is Jealous Of These Tits; And For Good Reason
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Jennifer Love Hewitt’s Tits Exposed cuz She’s Finally Getting Laid Again
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Because There’s Not Better Way for a Loser Like You to spend Their Friday Night
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Lindsay Lohan’s Best Tit Pictures
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Slut Gives a Cam show on the Couch – VIDEO
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The 50 Most Embarrassing Athlete/Coach Photos
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Drunk Slut Gets Stuck in a Dryer – VIDEO
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Because Everyone Enjoys Playing With Toys
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Lookin Good Sweetheart of the Day
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There’s Always Time For a Paris Hilton Panty Peek
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Leighton Meester vs Carrie Underwood CATFIGHT
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Jayde Nicole Tits And Other Porn Stars
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Some Sofia Vergara Hotness
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And Here’s Some of Bree Olsen’s Personal Pics
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Kim Kardashian is Still Dead and here’s Hoping She Stays That Way
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A Collection of Sweet Sweet Lesbians
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Gianna Deninno & Joana Shari Are Worth Taking a Look At
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Kelly’s Amazing Oiled Up Ass – VIDEO
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Mandy and Pamela’s Awesome Stripdown
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Top 5 Sci Fi Fantasy Pornos
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Katy Perry and Keri Hilson Get Sexy to Salut the Troops
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Molly Gets Her Pussy Eaten
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Franziska Knuppe Gallery
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Krusten Ritter is Hot
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A Little Bit of Elsa Pataky
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Christina Aguilera Sluts It Up With Her New Man
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16 Sexually Inappropriate News Bloopers
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Kylie Minogue Hotness
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How About a Little Caprice
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Kelly Bensimon is in a Bikini
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Michael Bay Directs The Victoria’s Secret 2010 Holiday Commercial
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Jayde Nicole Tits And Other Porn Stars
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Kelly Bensimon Possible Bikini Camel Toe
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Follow Me On FACEBOOK and TWITTER

Posted in:stepLINKS