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Jenna Ortega for the Beetlejuice Photocall of the Day

Kelly Brook From Big Titty Model to Big Back Model of the Day

Charli XCX for Demon Kim Kardashian’s Brand of the Day

Christina Aguilera and her Botox Face and Ozempic Body Get Slutty of the Day

Shannon Mcmullen is the Instagram Of The Day

2009

Jan

Mischa Barton in a Bikini in Goa of the Day

10 Comments »

Sloppy Mischa Barton was in Goa for her Christmas vacation. All I know about Goa is that in the 90s, there was a group of hippie ravers in fur pants who used to get high and massage each other listening to Goa trance. Their dreams beyond being at one with the music and dancing in a sweaty disgusting mess into the afternoon, was to go to Goa for these crazy hippie parties on the beach under the moon, well it looks like Mischa Barton is living their dream, while they are being treated for anxiety issues that comes from too much ecstasy use 10 years after the fact….

I pulled this from her blog:

Here are some photos from my Christmas vacation in Goa. The ocean there was so beautiful and warm I didn’t want to get out. I would swim all day, ate mostly a vegetarian diet and bought some beautiful things from the vendors I bargained with — jewelry, saris, you name it.

I am pretty sure that this wasn’t written by Mischa Barton, but whoever wrote it is just as fucking boring as her, so I guess that means they are doing a good job. I feel like I am reading a sixth grade summer vacation re-cap assignment, like I do sometimes and I am pretty offended bitch didn’t pay retail for the jewelry, saris you name it. You know she can afford to pay the US dollar to feed the vendor’s family for a fucking week in exchange for their fucking smut they are peddling, but bitch had to jew out and negotiate. That offends me. But surprisingly, she was well received, probably because her ass looks like Sag Paneer .

Too bad she wasn’t in Mumbai a couple weeks ago, if you know what I mean. Here are her photoshop retouched bikini pics she released for attention….Nice head piece, looks like you’re really embracing the culture, you fucking cunt.

Posted in:Bikini|Mischa Barton

2009

Jan

Amy Winehouse is the New Nike Spokesperson of the Day

7 Comments »

Word on the internet is that Amy Winehouse is the new spokesperson from Nike. I guess they liked that she had an emaciated body of a Kenyan runner and the lung capacity of a 75 year old chain smoker.

Sure, performance drugs are frowned upon in professional sports, but being able to pull crazy stunts, like having a professional music career, or doing cartwheels, while jacked on debilitating drugs, is considered stamina. Don’t believe what people tell you, because she is a fucking athlete, only her sport is getting high and she’s the Gold Medal winner.

I think it’s nice to see that Nike didn’t let her hard work, drive and passion to go above and beyond the average in getting high go unnoticed, but not as nice as her tits. Just do it.

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Nike

2009

Jan

Nicky Hilton Buys Toilet Paper of the Day

2 Comments »

I have no fucking shame, nothing embarrasses me anymore and I think drinking has something to do with that. When I first started up this whole alcohol abuse thing when I was a teenager, I’d feel like an asshole when I did stupid things like tried to get my friend’s girlfriend’s naked, or touching girls inappropriately, or getting in fights, I’d wake up a self hater who didn’t want to show his fucking face. Then as time went on, I got into bigger messes, made a bigger fool of myself everytime I drank than I did the time before and I’d be tearing people apart, puking, pissing, shitting fucking anything and everything you’d think you’d wake up regretting, and instead I just embraced it. There were times I couldn’t get it up for girls I was about to fuck, or times I came too fast. There were times I probably took advantage of situations and did real evil things and I just figured it was all part of life, you know normal fuck ups.

That said, over all these years there are still two things that humiliate me. The first is walking out of a public bathroom that smells like shit after taking a piss, knowing the next person in line will assume I stank it up because I am fat, so whenever that happens I catch myself justifying myself to a guy I don’t know about how I didn’t take a fucking shit despite what it may look like. The other thing is buying toilet paper. I always feel like the clerk thinks I am groundhogging/ you know ready to fucking dump as I rush to pay her for the shit and for some reason, I feel like a caged animal being watched when I just want privacy.

I have suggested to people I know to invent toilet paper vending machines, I have resorted to stealing toilet paper from public bathrooms even when I have the 3 dollars to buy a pack, I have used old socks, magazines and newspaper on my ass to avoid this shopping experience as best as I fucking can and I find it way more destructive to my self than pulling out my mini dick to fuck a chick only to have her laugh at me….

By the looks of it, Nicky Hilton and her drippy asshole don’t have the same issue as me. Instead of getting her maid to do her dirty work, she proudly parades to the world that she shits, and that she most likely has to shit as she rushes to her car to get home before it end up on her car seat and the whole thing is disgusting to me, but not as disgusting as the possibility that she’s picking this shit up for her sister’s drippy pussy.

Posted in:Nicky Hilton|Toilet Paper

2009

Jan

Jessica Alba And Her New Haircut Ignore Everyone Around Her of the Day

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Jessica Alba has always pissed me off for various reasons. Whether it was not getting naked in movies when I bought into the hype that she was one of the hottest bitch in Hollywood, or out getting knocked up to trap her boyfriend because she’s a broken little girl who has no friends, or acting like an annoying bitch acts when you’re having a fight with her, where she gives you the silent treatment and pretends your not there like you were 6 and on the fucking playground and no matter what you say, or how hard you try to get her to crack because you still want to fight, she stares blankly past you making you more pissed off so you punch the bitch in the jaw like you were Hayden Panettiere’s dad, and bitch still stares blankly past you, only a single tear runs down her cheek, making you more frustrated so you choke her out and as she gasps for air, she finally cracks, kicks you in the balls and calls the police, where you spend the next 24 hours getting fucked up by cocks for being a wife beater, when really you were just trying to get noticed. Only Alba does that shit to the paparazzi, walking around like they aren’t there and seeing that shit pisses me off, why can’t she just be fucking personable, you know considering her career and fans have done pretty good for her, instead of pulling this cunt behavior. Sure, she probably doesn’t have much of a personality or much to say, but just giving a smile or acknowledging the scum that is around her even if they are just trying to milk what she says for personal gain, would be the nice thing to do.

If I wanted to get her attention and I was a paparazzi, I would have just slandered her, you know say screaming obscenities about her vagina and what I would do to it, something like “Hey Alba, your pussy smells like shit, I think they left the placenta in, and I want to suck it our with a fucking straw, you like that you fucking whore, don’t you” or something that hits close to home like “Don’t ignore me bitch,this the kind of cold shoulder behavior is the reason I have some pictures and video of Cash Warren getting it on with a chick who isn’t you when you were at home with the baby, wanna see?”….not that I’d ever be a paparazzi or trying to get Alba’s attention, I’m just saying…..

Posted in:Jessica Alba|New Hair

2009

Jan

stepLINKS of the Day

5 Comments »

I am feeling pretty under the weather and when it’s a fucking snow storm outside, that’s saying a lot. I tried telling a girl I was talking to that I wanted her to play with my weakened immune system, you know touch that shit inappropriately and make it cum down her throat, turns out that weakened immune systems don’t turn girls on, it makes them think you have AIDS, so do you best to not tell the girl you’re trying to get with that….Other than that, my life’s pretty boring, so that’s why I got you this big list of links…so click em if you’re not out getting drunk and dancing on tables, which I am sure you’re not, because you’re reading this….

Lily Allen Being PRo Cocaine May Explain Why She is So Stupid
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WTF Happened to Drew Barrymore?
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There’s Another New Whore Shacking Up at the Playboy Mansion
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A Walk in Beer Fridge is the Only Fridge I Need
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Bam Margera is a Rich Asshole and Here is the Skatepark He Built At His Place
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Elle is Nothing But Sexy
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They Finally Made an Afro Samurai Game
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Big Assed Divas Throwdown to Diva
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Anahi Gonzalez Can Clean My House Anytime
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Here’s The Video of Josh Brolin Getting Arrested
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Jade Jagger Panty Upskirt Throwback
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I Can’t Get Enough of Rosario Dawson
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Angelina Jolie is Gonna Buy Another Black Kid, But I Guess Thats Alright
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Why is Ann Hathaway So Fucking Boring?
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The Court Says Britney Still Ain’t Right, And a Crazy Britney is Fine By Me
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Let’s Bask in Beyonce Together
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Porn, What Is It Good For?
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Top 10 Videos of Celebrities Grabbing Their Boobs
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A Cow Gives Birth to a Human …..
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Dancing With the Nipple Slips
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Celebrity Cat Fight!
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Skater Takes a But Shot
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Charlotte Will Seduce You
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Why The Fuck Would You Ruin a Bentley Like That?
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Find Girls to Fuck – Because Sex is a Two Person Activity
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Bulldozer Freestyle
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Because We Both Know You’ll Never Get Laid On Your Own
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Carmen Electra Makes Wire Hangers Fun
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Ski Lift FAIL
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Jessica Alba’s Mom is Going to Eat Cash Warren
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Jesus (Son of God) Can Kiss My Mexican Ass
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Sexy Babes Dance Off
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I Love Cindy Crawford More and More Everyday
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Place Your Bets!!!
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Daisey Lowe is Naked
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Jenny is a Leopord
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Because a Good Smile Can Do a Lot For You
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Vagina Boxing!
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Will Ferrell is Going to Play George Bush on Broadway
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More Jon LaJoie
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If Paris Hilton Has Only Fucked Two People, I Have a Fully Functioning Penis
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The Best Movies You Didn’t See in 2008
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Half Women, Half Donkey
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The 9 Hottest Italian Women
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Greased Up Girl Do a Slip and Slide
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Some Emo Girls Kissing and Shit
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Some Naked Chicks Being Naked
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Check Out this Hot Playboy Chick in a Whole New Language
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There Names are the Parker Sisters and They Get Naked Together
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Some Hot Drunken Sluts in Some Hot Drunken Pics
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Some Denise Milani Big Tits in a Blue Bikini Video
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10 greatest naked fight scenes ever made
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ROGUE COLLECTOR’S PHOTOBUCKET FINDS

Some Old Lady Showing Off Some TIt
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Some Fake Lip Party….
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BONUS – People Always Bug Me for the Gallery of the Header Pics I Post…I Decided to Do Just That For You…I wonder if Diddy Hand Selected Her to Promote Ciroc Himself…That Motherfucker is Always on the Cutting Edge of Marketing…
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2009

Jan

Reese Witherspoon’s Mom Ass Fighting The Fat of the Day

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Reese Witherspoon is constantly out fighting her her obvious fate as a fat Southern mom and grandma, by the looks of these pictures of her working out, her ass is winning. Kinda like her vagina won in the fight to lock Ryan Phillippe down by getting pregnant during a drunken hook up while on the Cruel Intentions set, but they aren’t together now, and either is her new boyfriend and his one true love Heath Ledger, so I guess things that aren’t meant to be just find a way to not be, and soon she’ll be trading in these workout pants in for a pair of elastic band jeans from the plus sized store but not to work out in, just to walk around in, because that’s what happens when they don’t make clothes in your size. Just ask my wife..

Posted in:Mom Ass|Reese Witherspoon|Spandex|Workout

2009

Jan

Amy Winehouse in a Couple More Topless Pics that Hit a Couple Days Ago of the Day

21 Comments »

With a history of serious drug use, a bloated unmaintained body and sloppy deflated malnourished tits, I really wonder what Amy Winehouse’s pussy looks like. You know, how does she maintain her pubic hair. Is it like each individual pubic hair is a building of it’s own, creating what seems like an active cosmopolitan area….the bald patches that look like pussy Leukemia are the park, the rashes are the highways and the various smells, insects and things that live within, the people in the everyday hustle and bustle of downtown life, like a microcosm of a third world country, or is it a perfect little pussy, perfectly taken care of, unlike the rest of her. Maybe she’s artistic and shaves shapes in her bush, maybe her labia is battered and flaking from various ill advised injection sites, I just don’t know and probably will never know the components that make up her lady parts and that is one of my life’s great tragedies….

Sure you’ve seen these pictures, but there really such thing as too much Amy Winehouse nudity…..I don’t think so…in fact…I know there isn’t.

Posted in:Amy Winehouse|Bikini|Topless

2009

Jan

Jessica Alba’s Mom is Easy of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t really know if Alba’s mom is a slut, but I can assume she is, I mean she did breed Alba and by lookin like this, she can’t have much self esteem and definitely takes all she can get and now that she’s menopausal it means no condoms, I mean provided you can live with yourself after mounting this. Sure, it’s the womb that made the girl you are convinced you are married to, you know the one you photoshopped into pictures of yourself in some elaborate fantasy that has gone too far, it’s one of those get as close as you can get to your dreams situations, but by lookin’ at this, even the biggest Alba fan on his horniest virgin day would have to really focus to finish off the job…even if boxy, overweight, elderly bitches without their lady hormones is their thing. Either way, I think Menopause is the least of Alba’s mom’s concerns, I mean look at her, she’s a fucking monster and a probable glimpse into Alba’s future, and really every woman’s future…it’s some circle of life shit. Get ready for it.

BONUS – Here’s Alba’s Mom Slutting Out in a See Through Shirt…I Guess She’s Taken on the Roll (with extra butter and gravy) of Caring for Her Useless Spoiled Daughter’s Baby….All While Trying to Seduce Us….Slut….

Posted in:Jessica Alba|Mom|Slut

2009

Jan

Michelle Rodriguez Thanks DUIs and the Legal System For Allowing Her To Be More Dyke Than Ever of the Day

4 Comments »

There are Bull Dykes that drive motorbikes, Diesel Dykes who drive big rigs and Van Dykes who have their own TV shoes in the 1960s and then there is Michelle Rodriguez. This bitch has more testosterone than the prescription my doctor gave me 5 years ago to man the fuck up, but instead turned me into an alleged rapist who got off because they could prove the testosterone treatment turned me into a superhero, a fate probably a lot better than the girl who I allegedly raped, who has to carry that shit around with her for the rest of her life, sucker.

Unfortunately for Michelle Rodriquez, getting off usually involves a strap on dildo banging against her oversized steroid clit as she sodomizes random whores she meets at her local college’s gay and lesbian club, or wherever the fuck you meet women who fuck women, and getting off doesn’t come to her after getting busted for a DUI, where her hard knock sentence involved a couple hours of community service, when regular people end up in jail for that shit.

What the judge didn’t know, is that Michelle Rodriguez always dreamt of being a construction working, shit was in her blood and in the imaginary testicles she used to grab whenever no one was looking, so giving her a rake, a hard hat, some steel toed boots, a reflector vest and some orange garbage bags is not really a punishment for this dude, it’s a fuckin’ dream come true…..

Here are the pics, until the paparazzi make me take it down…..

Posted in:Dyke|Michelle Rodriguez

2009

Jan

Carolina “Pampita” Ardohain Does Rolling Stone Argentina of the Day

1 Comment »

I am pretty sure all the South American Ass loving perverts out there know exactly who Pampita is….For those of you who don’t know her, she’s some South American girl with a crazy ass who has been on TV, in various modeling shoots like Victoria’s Secret and Wonderbra and has pretty much no respect from High Fashion Argentina models because she’s a peasant or from her ex husband who she cheated on, and ran off on, only to get knocked up by the new guy and have a baby with him last February. Thanks Wikipedia.

Now she’s trying to make a comeback, show the world the baby didn’t rape her like the story her vagina tells, and I figured since shit’s making the rounds, I’d post it…so here are Some of those Rolling Stone Argentina Pics of a girl they call Pampita and her Ass.

Speaking of Crazy Ass, Check Out This Picture That Was Emailed to Me….
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Posted in:Ass|Carolina Ardohain|Pampita|Rolling Stone