So my internet didn’t work when I woke up this morning after a night of drinking and I figured it was a message from God to take some time for myself because I just work way too hard, then I realized that I barely work, what I do is my way to waste my free time, I just happen to have a lot of it, so it seems like I am always online being productive, I am online all the time, but I am never productive, I just have nothin’ better to do. It also turns out that there is no God, my neighbor just didn’t pay for his internet I’ve been stealing, so I went over to give him shit about it, he made a few calls, and now I’m back.
In my time off, I decided to go on a walk, I came across a sign that was promoting some moving sale at someone’s house near by. It said there was designer clothes, jewelry, Luis Vuitton products and all this other bootleg shit, so I figured I’d take my cracked out self by to pick up some Luis Vuitton luggage on discount, so I could turn around and sell that shit for a profit, like I was Obama livin’ in the Ghetto, sellin’ crack, but when I got there all they had was a couple of picnic baskets, a pair of skis from the 80s and 2 bibles. It was a bust….
Just like this new Kanye West video that premiered earlier today….
I would like inform you that Scarlett Johansson (actress) actually is a clone from original person Scarlett Galabekian last name, who has nothing with acting career. That clone was created illegally by using stolen biological material. Original person is very nice (not d**n sexy),most important – CHRISTIAN young lady! I’ll tell you more,those clones (it’s not only one) made in GERMANY – world leader manufacturer of humans clones, it is in Ludwigshafen am Rhein, Rhineland-Palatinate, Mr. Helmut Kohl home town. You can not even imaging the scale of the cloning activity. But warning! Helmut Kohl clone staff strictly controlling all their clones (at least they trying) spreading around the world, they are very accurate with that, some of them are still NAZI type disciplined and mind controlled clones, so be careful get close with clones you will be controlled as well. Original person is not happy with those movies, images, video, rumors and etc. spreading on media in that way it would be really nice if we all will try slow down that ”actress” career development, original Scarlett will really appreciated that. Please remember that original Scarlett’s family did not authorize any activity with stolen biological materials, no matter what form it was created in it was stolen and it is stolen. It all need to be delivered to authorized personals control in Cedars-Sinai Medical Center in Los Angeles. Original Scarlett never was engaged, by the way!
Her close friend Serge G.
P.S. CONTROLLING ACTIVITY OF ANY CLONES IS US MILITARY OPERATION.
Okay…..that was some kind of crazy…I’ve been lazy and tired today and I am going to drink with my clone, and by clone I mean my drunk self, who looks like me, but is a lot more fun, I’ll try to bring it tomorrow, but no promises, considering I never actually bring anything….
Here are my links:
Angelina Jolie Used to Be Amazing….Now She’s a Mom…. GO
So last week, Janice Dickinson was ripping into the paparazzi for being rats and from the sewers, and I was totally down with that, despite knowing that the paparazzi are the only reason she’s ever spoken of, because she may call herself the first supermodel, I never heard of her until she was working on another supermodel’s TV show and by that time, she was already beat up by the plastic surgeon’s knife and collagen injections that the only thing super about her, was the ability to suck dick without knowing she was sucking dick due to having no nerve endings left in her mouth….
Today she’s striking a pose for the motherfuckers and acting like their best fucking friends and this inconsistency is fuckin’ with my head. I guess she’s crazy, which makes sense, I mean she does have a vagina after all.
Scarlett Johansson reminds me of a childhood friend I used to spend time with’s sister. She wasn’t really anything amazing to look at, you know always had a dumb look on her face and a bit of a dumpy body, but she had huge tits and for some unknown reason (her huge tits), all the guys in our school wanted to fuck the shit out of her.
I used to try to convince my friend to take pictures of her showering or in her underwear or pretty much anything exclusive that only he’d have access to because he was an insider and he would always get mad at me, you know telling me shit like “Dude, that’s my sister”.
I would always tell him that that was the beauty of the whole situation, firstly she’d never expect him to be doing that or lookin’ at her like that, so she’d be more comfortable and willing to be naked or topless around him because she didn’t see him as the predator but as family.
I would also tell him that if I had a sister, I’d totally bang the shit out of her, because at the time I was horny and appreciated the idea of having pussy sleeping in the bedroom next to me, and he would just freak out on me.
I then did some research at the local library to prove that there is no evidence that fucking your sister would lead to flipper babies, especially if you’re wearing a condom. The whole flipper baby theory was the government’s way to control people into being too scared to marry their family members and reproduce with their family members, before TV existed. You know, make them think if they do it, they’re going to go to hell and their demon child will be the proof that will get them caught, and I was just asking for some nudes, I wasn’t asking him to go out and crawl in bed with her and slide his hand in her panties while she was sleeping, and by hand, I mean penis.
Needless to say, I never got the pics, we stopped being friends and my persuasion didn’t work out as well as I had hoped, but every time I see Scarlett Johansson, I think about that girl and the set of tits I never saw. Here she is at some event.
I saw this preview for Extreme Home Makeover the other day, and it made me laugh. This show is known for taking people’s sob stories are really milking the shit out of them, to get the sympathy views, or people who want to sit around and cry at how moving ABC is because they make these half million dollar houses for these families, while Ty makes half a million dollars an episode, and ABC makes millions of dollars an episode through advertisers all while most of the work and materials, furniture, appliances and accessories are donated by the companies who make them because they like the product placement plug and because the sob story sells, only this week they took it one step farther, by not just building a home for a sob story, but to have it built by a bunch of sob story.
The preview I saw had some guy with no legs manning a back ho and some dude on crutches running the project and i thought they took shit pretty much as far as they could, because like porn, eventually you get de-sensitized to standard missionary position sob stories and the less of an impact they have on your emotions, and I guess the only way to keep things extreme is to throw in handicapped people to build the houses. The whole thing is crazy, but I don’t really see how they’ll ever top this one off…..
Katy Perry flashed her panties and I wasn’t there to point and laugh, not that I would, because if I was in the same room as this cunt, I would most likely be throwing furniture at her, telling her to get that fucking song out of my head. You know if you met the person who has been torturing you all these months, you’d want to get your revenge too, but I guess the only salvation I have is that there’s nothing hot about this pig of a girl, who may look like she’s not a pig anymore, because of all the cocaine addiction and pressure of having to dance around on stage and get off her couch, but the second she stops that shit, it’s back to donuts and potato chips where she’ll figure out a new sexual fantasy that attention craving girls do to exploit, I can assume that flashing your white panties in a way that we can’t determine how meaty or hairy your pussy is while hanging with Perez Hilton aren’t it.
I can’t post the pics, because the agency that owns them is a cocksucker who sent me a 6,000 dollar invoice, so I’ll link out to another site in the event you’re interested in looking at this pasty bitch lookin’ very unattractive, even with the sound turned off.
Too see the shitty pictures, follow this link, but I really don’t know why you’d want to … GO
I think the Willis family are pretty fucking rancid girls. I am talking wrongfully labeled People’s Most Beautiful because their mom paid off the magazine to put them on the list and was trying to cover-up the lies that she’s been feeding them their entire life when they come to her crying that a boy turned them down because they look like monsters.
Now every time Rumer comes crying on her mother’s doorstep, interrupting Ashton Kutcher’s MILF Fantasy where Demi teaches him how to tie his shoe while fucking his face, she can bust out the magazine and say “what do guys know, People Magazine said your beautiful”, tricking her into believing it and shutting her the fuck up so Rumer can goes back to her life with her delusion, far from Demi, because every time Demi looks at Rumer, she has to be reminded of how she wronged the world and how God wronged her, so it’s better to keep shit out of sight, for pretty much all of us,
Sometimes delusion is better than the truth since the truth in this case would lead any normal person to jump off a fucking bridge to say goodbye to this cruel world and leave their broken up face in a ravine/river where it belongs….
I don’t know what the fuck Demi Moore did wrong in a past life, or what the silicone implants and botched plastic surgery/ drug use did to her uterus but I think it’s just bad genes, because when she was younger she was a fuckin’ disgusting troll of a woman too, but she was smart enough to invest in herself and trick the world into thinking she was worth fucking, and by world I mean Ashton Kutcher, her tool to make her feel young.
Either way, I got this email about the Willis sisters and since I am lazy today, I figured I’d put it out there, because I hate them, and apparently so do other people.
i wish rumer was doing something other than being ugly in these pics. do what you wish with them. they might not end up being of any use to you.
rumer is a major cunt though. i met her and wanted to choke her all night. the way she treated the staff there was insane. she barked orders at them like they were idiots. bitch doesn’t even know how to say thank you.
When you’re that ugly, you’re allowed to hate the world. Here are those pics.
After all this O(prah)Bama shit, I am happy to say that my unemployed friend in New Mexico just applied for food stamps it’s a great day for America and for him.
I got this email:
Hi!
My name is Angelina and I have 3 wonderful kids and one of my daughter is
diagnosed with tourrette’s syndrome,the doctor says it is a child onset
disorder with symptoms appearing between 2 and 15 years of age, so she needs me
more than ever, due to our family emergency ,I am looking to place a
litter of gorgeous english bulldog puppies and parents, I cannot afford to care
for these dogs anymore. They are so adorable with wonderful
personalities and they have their complete shots and worming.Please contact me
immediately if you are interested in the dogs.
Have a beautiful day,
Angelina.
I get emails like this everyday, always about someone trying to unload bulldog puppies and I don’t fuckin’ get it and that’s all I have to say about that….
Here are my links:
Marilyn Manson Got Dumped By That 17 Year Old Who Thinks She’s Dita Von Tease GO
Here’s Some Trailer For a Movie Kind of About Star Wars, You Know, Cause
We Didn’t Say Everything We Already Had to Say With All The Other Star Wars Movies GO
This British Chick Looks Like an Even More Digusting Version of Paris Hilton GO
Leonardo Dicaprio Wants You to Feel Sorry for Him GO
RIP Motherfucker the Michael Crichton Edition….I Guess, he’s Gone to the Big Jurassic Park in the Sky….and the people in the ER weren’t very good to their Client …. GO
Last year, this cop in training was among FHM’s High Street Honeys Top Ten. I guess that’s some UK shit. Since then, Katie Green was chosen as the new face (and body) of Wonderbra, to her surprise because she’s a size 12. Former Wonderbra Models include Eva Herzigova, Sophie Anderton, who’s vagina I just posted and Dita Von Teese, clearly leading us to realize that the people at Wonderbra aren’t too picky and take what they can get.
I saw these pictures of her posing naked and figured I’d end the day with them, because let’s face it, I have a headache, i am tired of writing and I only have 3 beers and a bottle of some obscur liquor someone brought me back from Hungary called Unicum, something I’ve tried to avoid because the name makes me feel gay when I takes swigs of it and because it tastes like some herbal remedy used to cure warts in the 1800s, not that I know what that would taste like, but we’re all allowed to make assumptions, I mean 90 percent of what I say is based on assumptions…
Here are them there pics….
Bonus – here she is in FHM High Street Honeys that took from the blue collar civil servant life and lead to her new career as a the Wonderbra model…. GO