I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2008

13

Mar

Sienna Miller’s Ass Crack in a Bikini of the Day

I didn’t feel like posting today, I don’t know why. Maybe because I was tired and sick or maybe it is because writing about the same useless people day after day leads any normal person into a depression, but I realized that I have nothing better to do and that I was depressed before starting this site, so here are some pictures of Sienna Miller in a bikini.

She’s the kind of celebrity I like, I don’t know why because her body isn’t really all that, sure she’s skinny, but her ass lacks personality and her tits are just standard at least she’s not fat and there’s something about that way she carries herself that makes me just want to fuck the shit out of her. That’s really not saying much because I was just at the bank applying for a credit card and this old lady in the senior citizen line tripped and fell and I totally saw up her old lady skirt and saw her old lady support underwear and my first reaction was to bone her while she was down….unfortunately, one of the bank employees decided to be a fuckin’ hero and helped her up, ruining the fun for the rest of us and by rest of us I mean me.

The good news is that I didn’t get the credit card because I have really bad credit, but at least I spent the last 3 hours there to find that out, I couldn’t have used the time for anything better. No seriously, it gave me something to do and here’s Sienna Miller’s Ass.

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Sienna Miller|Tits

2008

13

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

My computer hasn’t been working and either have I – so I went out and got drunk last night. The hightlight of my night was going to a tanning salon in hopes of seeing some sluts out of their element like I often do, but instead got a free 20 minute session because I chatted up the girl. I was drunk and feel a little gayer than I did yesterday morning. I can only assume the logical next step for me is to join a gym, get a six back and suck cock in the sauna. Thank god I am too lazy for that….so here are some golden brown links…to start the day…There may be more a little later one….We’ll see if I’m not too busy taking dance classes….

America’s Next Top Model Does Slutty Raw Meat Photoshoot
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Spitzer Girls Revealed
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Some Polish Chick Named Doda Eating Ice Cream in Her Panties Like a Slut
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Her Name is Haylynn Cohen and This is Her Frontal Wedgie
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Kate Beckinsale Sluts it up for Mean Magazine Video Shoot
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Some Amateur Tits in Video
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Britney Spears in Her Slutty new Cartoon Music Video
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Party Slut Rockin’ Her Thong
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Here are Some Girls Showing Off Their Underwear
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Some Tori Spelling Shitty Cleavage Pics
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Donald Trump’s Hot Wife is a Pedophile
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How To Properly Booty Dance
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Christina Aguilera is on the Breast Feeding Diet
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A Couple that will Give You Hope
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Robbie Williams Does a Mangina
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Top 10 Biggest Sluts In Hollywood
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The 10 Most Annoying Cartoon Characters Ever
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Lauren Conrad has Her Own Obnoxious Clothing Line
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Fuck With These Whores….They Will Get Naked For You
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET

Some Girl and Her Friends Have Vaginas They Want You To See….
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Use this to Find Girls to FUck – Because Girls Make Sex More Fun
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Find The Best Porn on the Internet According to Me
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Posted in:Uncategorized

2008

12

Mar

Saving Abel’s Uncensored Music Video For Addicted of the Day

I don’t like this song at all but I do like the video. It’s got a couple of girls showing off their hot panty asses and bare tits while playing with each other on a bed as the asshole lead singer of the band tries to video tape them like it’s some kind of sex tape….which just makes me mad because the last girl who wanted me to videotape her was my wife on a camping trip so that she would always have the memories of the weekend she ate all our food in the first 24 hours of being in the woods, leading to us having to hunt and gather from the land to survive.

That’s not the point, the point is that I just like my music videos to be more like a porno movie, because I want all things in my life to be more like a porno movie including my life, but that’s just because the girls in porno are so classy and I’m tired of this poverty ghetto life I’m livin’

Watch the Uncensored Video if You Like Bad Rock and Tits
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Posted in:Playboy|Saving Abel|Uncensored

2008

12

Mar

Selma Blair Bikini Action of the Day

I am all for girls with small tits, so here are some pictures of Selma Blair in her bikini playing with her non existent tits.

She reminds me of the 45 year old whore last night who was built like a 12 year old boy and who for some reason had all the guys makin’ it rain on that ho. A guy I was with wanted to see why she was so popular because she looked like a budget stripper that would affordable to poor people during the recession but figured that she had some secret moves….He left me alone for about 5 minutes before coming back with a disgusted look on his face.

I asked what happened and he told me she stuck her ass in his face and it smelled like shit. I decided to take it up with the management because I am self-serving and wanted to get a free drink out of my friend’s traumatic experience, but the manager just told me that was her trick, she wouldn’t wash her junk because that’s what her clients want. So this 45 year old mother, who probably gets fucked a lot both for money and for the feeling of being wanted, doesn’t wash her fucking vagina and that is how she makes all her money….and I got jealous because it seems like a pretty easy gig.

I guess the real question is what Selma Blair’s ass smells like…because I know that’s what you’re into….

Posted in:Bikini|Selma Blair|Tits

2008

12

Mar

Kathleen Robertson’s Pregnancy Tits in a One Piece of the Day

Her name is Kathleen Robertson and she’s 35, knocked up and has fat tits in her one-piece bathing suit. The good news for her is that she will have a little fucker who will always love her unconditionally, or until the repressed memories of her touching it inappropriately surface, because it will come in handy when her husband leaves her for never bouncing back from her pregnancy weight.

Speaking of bouncing, this stripper who we negotiated with to get her to insert 4 fingers in her vag and a thumb in her bum was at the stripclub last night. The reason we did it was because she was fat and just as hungry for money as she was for donuts and we knew we could get her to push her limits a little. She was even fatter this time around, I guess it was the winter weight, or maybe it’s from spending the whole night on a chair sprawled out like she was on my couch eating a bag of fuckin’ chips….nothing says please touch my tits for ten dollars like a drooling fat slob with a plate of fries in front of her.

Posted in:Kathleen Robertson|Nipples|One Piece Bathing Suit|Tits

2008

12

Mar

Lil Wayne’s New Video – Lollipop of the Day

Here is the new Lil Wayne music video rough edit for some song called Lollipop. The reason I am posting it is because every college girl and all her fucking slutty friends get wet for this fucker’s music and it’s pretty sleazy shit that I am surprised gets on TV when I can’t even get an ad deal on my fucking website because I post nipples….

Either way, I figure you should learn the words so that when you see them young sluts in the club, you can sing along and they’ll think you’re a fuckin’ hero for being so on top of shit and will treat you to a date with their vagina….Tell them you’re a DJ because sluts seem to like DJs….

Speaking of DJs, DJ AM is known to hate me in real life because of the shit I say about him on the internet. He has pretty much told me to fuck off to my face and that didn’t hurt my feelings, because I probably wouldn’t invite someone who makes fun of me all the time back to my hotel room to fuck my hot model girlfriends while I watch like the pervert I am because I am gayer than bicycle shorts and use my model girlfriend as bait to get to see your cock…..so I decided to buy him on Facebook for 100,000 dollars. Take that hater…that’ll teach you…don’t make me do it again…

So if you hate me out there, watch out, because I may just do the same to you….

Posted in:Lil Wayne|Lollipop|Rough

2008

12

Mar

Patsy Kensit in a See Through Shirt of the Day

Her name is Patsy Kensit and she is a nobody who married the dude in Oasis when he was at the height of her career which pretty much means she’s still a nobody, because Oasis died a long time ago, but since she’s out and the paparazzi care enough to take pictures of her tits. I guess whenever I go out, which is almost never, and a girl shows me her tits I always try to get pictures of it. Unfortunately for me, it turns out that strip clubs don’t like cameras very much and beat you up for trying to capture the moment to share with your loved ones when they ask for what you’ve been up to…..

Either way, I guess she’s never given up and that’s something I like to tell strippers to keep their morale up, but usually only at the end of my lap dances when I’ve run out of money….but that’s just because I want them to keep on going….but they usually take it as some kind of inspirational words of wisdom that helps them live with themselves for being whores….whores who have now had their tits seen by less people that this Patsy Kensit character. I guess she’s like the Den Mother now…

I don’t know what I am talking about.

Posted in:Nipples|Patsy Kensit|See Through|Shirt

2008

12

Mar

Bijou Phillips is Excited of the Day

I found both Bijou Phillips and her boyfriend Danny Masterson from That 70s Show fame on Facebook around the same time someone emailed me these pictures of them at some fashion week event where Bijou is going fuckin’ insane, because she’s just that lively of a person. I guess you have to make the most out of life when you have a terminal illness.

Reality is, I wasn’t going to write about this HIV lookin’ hipster bitch, but I figured why the fuck not. I like rich girls with nothing better to do than develop drug addictions and fake modeling and acting careers because they are skinny enough and because their daddy’s have friends in high places, but I wanted to take a different approach.

So I reached out to both of them and told them I wanted them to write th posts about themselves because I had no interest doing it anymore and I got no response. So I am only doing this post to declare the war is officially on. This post may not reflect my anger, but I am still drunk from last night, but trust me, Masterson and Phillips…it’s on.

Posted in:Bijou Phillips|Excited|Upskirt

2008

12

Mar

Pink in a Bikini on a Boat of the Day

Here are some pictures of Pink celebrating being recently single by going out on a cruise alone and taking pictures of herself alone and getting her little hired homie to take a couple for her, because that’s what you do when you don’t have a husband to take pictures of you or with you anymore. It’s kinda like watching a recent widow accidentally buy two coffees at the coffee shop by force of habit…You do the same things you always did only you do them alone, like a self sufficient, empowered woman, who needs men kind of thing, even though Pink is kinda cheating the whole feminist movement by having a penis.

The good thing about Pink is that she can be your thinspiration. I went to the strip club with him last night and this anabolic fitness bodybuilder chick got up on stage. I am immediately disgusted by her 3 inch long clit that is bigger than your limp dick, but my friend tells me that she’s the reason he comes here 3 times a week because she has the body he’s been trying to get at the gym, so he takes her into the lap dance booth and she gives him work out tips.

I asked him if he’s going to get the implants by summer too, because grabbing her broad shoulders and chiseled biceps is pretty homo and getting implants would be the logical next step. He didn’t laugh, but between you and me, I hope he does because I’ll get to touch them whenever I want for free and even though touching my male friend’s fake tits seems gay, it’s way more fun than giving each other high fives or bro-hugs.

Either way, she’s in a bikini and some of you may dig that. It doesn’t make you gay, it just makes you weird.

Posted in:Bikini|Pink|Tits

2008

12

Mar

stepLINKS of the Day

I got this email:

Dear Jesus Martinez,

You’re a dick.

Lots of love,

Your mom

This is what I wrote back:

Mom?!

Is that really you? Daddy told me you went on vacation and but you never came home? Part of the reason I started this site was in hopes that one day it would reach you. Not having you in my life all these years really created a void that I filled with self destructive behavior. I am so glad you wrote me…now we can start the recovery process.

So, where have you been all my life. Let’s meet up so you can give me all those outstanding birthday and christmas gifts. I will accept a lump sum payment if it’s easier.

Send Nudes, since I feel like I don’t know you, I think it’s ok to get off to you, even if we’re related.

Love

Your son, Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

Here are my links:

Leelee Sobieski Has a Weird Fucking Fetish
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Become a Sexplorer:
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Some Dude Jumps Out of a Plane With No Parachute Insanity
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Here Are Sexiest Idols
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Her Name is Alba Parietti and this is her Nipple
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Britney Spears is a Cartoon in her New Video Which Makes Her Easier to Jerk Off To
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This Site Has A Lot of Sluts Posing in Lingerie
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Fuck With These Whores….
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Fake Tits at the Club
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An American Idol is Shopping Around Her Nude Pics Unfortunately
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Some Dude Gives Himself Liposuction
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Lohan Training Her Sister to be a Slut
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News Anchor Vs. Reporter Video
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Her Name is Catalina White…She’s a Roller Girl…This is Her Photoshoot
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This is Mischa Barton’s New Boyfriend
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Madonna Admits to Doing E
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Juliette Lewis is Dressed Like a Clown….I Guess She’s Been Hanging With Panettiere
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Mia Rocks Shows Off her Crazy TIts
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The New York Governor’s Alleged Whores
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Jenna Jameson for PETA Video
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Her Name is Mindy Vega and this is Her Showing Off her Body
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Funny Video of a Girl Waxing Off Her Cooch
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Pregnant Slut About to Explode of the Day
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2 Girls One Cup Meet Something Way More Vile….
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A Film Crew Gets Arrested for Trying to Kill Kate Hudson for Trying To Kill Owen Wilson by Breaking His Heart….
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Some Pictures of Some Dude’s Bachelor Party
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Jessica Simpson Live From Kuwait on the Today Show
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Morgan Fairchild’s Old Cleavage
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Miss Phillipines Girl Stumbles While Answering a Question
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100 Pictures of Hot Chicks Washing Cars
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Watch This Clip of Jamaican Dudes Talking About How They Hustle White Tourists
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Some Red Pepper Kinkiness
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Some Hot Chick Farting Video
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Who is the Pornstar in these Ads….I guess Both Are…
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Dave Navarro is Pushing Seasons Like an Asshole
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Weird Alien Rape Video
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I Beat Anorexia
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How To Get Tested for STDs
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How To Prevent STDs
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Letterman Asks Paula Abdul If She’s Drunk
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Tila Tequila’s 3 step sisters Try to Share the Spotlight by Being Sluts in this Video
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Janet Jackson Has Been Hospitalized
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Some Britney Skye Porn Star Pictures
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Some Girl Showing Off Her Tits at a Fast Food Restaurant
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Hilary Clinton Farts
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Jessica Simpson Rockin’ Out in Iraq
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Hot Chick Exercising
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Jenna Jameson Poses With Jenna Jameson
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Orange Coast College Cheerleaders are Sluts and I Like Them
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Slaw Wrestling Pictures and Videos Make me Hungry
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How to Tell If She is a Hooker or a Cop Video
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Some Crazy Retard Sex – NSFW – But Funny as Fuck…
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FROM PHOTOBUCKET:

Some of the More Hardcore Shit Found on Photobucket – Some Lesbianism, Some Flexible Mastubration, Some Sex…
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Some Fat Blowjob and Sex
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FROM THE FORUM

Pre-Release Portishead – Third
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Frou Frou – Details
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Lenny Kravitz – Time for a Revolution
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Zero 7 – Simple Things
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Hard-Fi – I Shall Overcome
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Soundgarden – A-Sides (Best of)
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Sparklehorse – Wonderfull Life
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Ghetto Fights DVD
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The Clientele – Strange Geometry
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The Blow – Paper TV
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Fight Club EBOOK
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Myspace is EVIL!
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Shay Laren
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Use This To Get Sex..Because Sex is Fun
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Use this to Find Girls to FUck – Because Girls Make Sex More Fun
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Find The Best Porn on the Internet According to Me
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Posted in:stepLINKS