DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2024

13

Aug

Dani Torres is the Instagram Of The Day

Dani Torres is a Fashionova Ambassador – so you know that she’s one of those classy bitches who helps promote stripper clothing that has made a dude a multi-billionaire thanks to instagram hustling through instagram strippers…IT IS the skinny tea of a generation and really, what happened to the SKINNY tea movement, did Facebook crackdown on them for being snakeoil lies that don’t make bitches skinny at all, or did the tea vendors make so much money that they collectively retired off the same….

WE WILL NEVER KNOW..

What we do know is that Danni Torres has some tits, tits that 850k people are into, probably in part due to the crazy hip to waist ratio…which could be photoshop…liposuction….filters….a rib removal…who fucking cares all this shit is fucking fake and medicated nodded out tranq titty content for the retard brain and it looks it.

Image Credit – Instagram

Posted in:Instagram Babe

2024

13

Aug

Tight Pant Tuesday of the Day

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Tight pants are better than tight pussy because at your level of desirability, you’d be lucky to get a granny who has been double fisting herself for 45 years as part of her back alley strip club act because she is homeless, out of the system, a true Wild West maverick with a drug addiction and one skill that gets her paid….you know a not so tight vagina…

While tight pants are tight on ALL vaginas, even the meaty and the wind-tunnel ones, allowing you to look at them and imagine them on your dick, or smothering your face, even though you know they never will…but you can archive that shit for the spank bank, or you can even archive that shit to visualize when you go out there to find old Loosey Linday the Back Alley Fister when she’s willing to let you stick it in her for an extra 5 bucks….

The tight pant…is so important….more important than you even know…

Here are some tight pants!

Posted in:Tight Pants

2024

13

Aug

Salma Hayek’s Old Lady Bikini of the Day

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Unlike other women her age, Salma Hayek is not spending her government issued old age pension at the casino on the slot machines while pissing herself in her adult diapers because her pelvic floor muscles are weak from years of being banged the fuck out.

She’s a rich old lady, so she can afford the diet and exercise programs, the hormonal stem cell therapies, the cosmetic procedures, the high paid photographers and after effect masters of photoshop to carry on as if she was still that overrated 30 year old Mexican actress that is really not that hot, but has a set of rockin’ tits, that made her hot enough, or that made us ignore her bulldog looking man-jaw.

She was sold to a billionaire family, the dude wanted to breed her as billionaires do, seeking her at any cost and getting her because these women are all whores…

We’ll assume part of her appeal tot he billionaire was that everyone was jerking off to her because she was marketed as hot, so in being a faggy rich guy, he wanted what everyone else wanted and can’t get, that’s the whole point of being rich…so he forces her to continue producing the smut for the jerk offs because it’s how he gets off in his weird rich person sex dungeon….and that’s actually far less creepy that the sex dungeons of the other rich people who only get off by killing and skinning hookers they never get arrested for killing because they are rich….

Posted in:Salma Hayek

2024

12

Aug

stepLINKS of the Day

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I hate when I am stuck behind an obese chick in Walmart on a hot and humid day and all I can smell is her cheesy, sweaty, asshole smell….especially when it turns me on…

Nothing but shame.

Here are some stepLINKS…

Here are some stepLINKS….

Jutta Leerdam is Back on the Speed Skating Rink!
LICK HERE

Behind the Scenes Of Addison Rae’s New Music Video!
LICK HERE

Heidi Klum’s Model Boobs on the Beach!
LICK HERE

Spoil Your Pet With Better Food!
LICK HERE

Dog Starts Up A Golf Cart And Crashes Into His Owner’S Truck
LICK HERE

Detectives Broke Character
LICK HERE

15 Awkward Moments We Can All Relate To
LICK HERE

Cat Sleeps On The Piano While The Pro Pianist Plays A Tune
LICK HERE

Camila Cabello Nipple Pokies in a Black T-Shirt!
LICK HERE

BIGGER IS BETTER
LICK HERE

20 + PEOPLE DEFINITELY HAVING A SHITTIER DAY THAN YOU
LICK HERE

What happened to Elsy Guevara? Social media star involved in concerning jet ski accident
LICK HERE

Rita Ora Flaunts Her Bikini Bod: Bootylicious in Formentera
LICK HERE

Bonus Butts #463
LICK HERE

Parked Mercedes Electric Car Suddenly Explodes
LICK HERE

Sydney Sweeney … Black Lingerie !
LICK HERE

Sabrina Carpenter Flaunts Sexy Legs at Outside Land Festival
LICK HERE

Really Scary And Funny Cliff Jumping Fails
LICK HERE

Blake & Ryans box office battle results
LICK HERE

Megan Thee Stallion Strips Down in New Music Video!
LICK HERE

Hannah White Shares Her Olympic Fails!
LICK HERE

Maybe breakdancing shouldn’t be in the Olympics
LICK HERE

Rescued Orphaned Walrus Cub Takes His First Swim In A Shallow Pool
LICK HERE

Natalia Garibotto in a purple bikini in a hotel pool in Mykonos
LICK HERE

Julianne Hough Under Water Nip Slip!
LICK HERE

Gold Medalist Surfer Caroline Marks Meets Steph Curry!
LICK HERE

Easily The Most Riveting Fencing Match Ever
LICK HERE

Great Skin is Just a Few Squirts Away!
LICK HERE

Ashley Benson Stuns in a Tiny Green Bikini, Flaunting Her Sexy Booty in Saint Tropez
LICK HERE

KILLER KARMA: 6 PEOPLE WHO WERE ASKING FOR IT
LICK HERE

“That looked like a malfunction” — Internet wonders what Tom Cruise was pulling on his leg during Olympics closing ceremony stunt
LICK HERE

Motorcycle Bursts Into Flames At The Gas Station
LICK HERE

I Swear I Didn’t Edit This
LICK HERE

Clip Featuring People Ignoring Level Crossings Like Its Their Last Day On Earth
LICK HERE

Rachel Zegler – green bikini on vacation
LICK HERE

The Hottest Uma Thurman Bikini Pics
LICK HERE

50 Funny Wives And Girlfriends Who Bring The Laughs To Their Relationships
LICK HERE

THE INSTAGRAM OF THE DAY: AISHAHSOFEY
LICK HERE

Shay Mitchell Cools Off!
LICK HERE

Amanda Kabdebo is the Instagram Of The Day
LICK HERE

Halsey Switches Up Her Look!
LICK HERE

Man Who Lost His Wallet Gets It Back From A Man Who Came To His Doorstep
LICK HERE

Doorbell Camera Captures A Pizza Deliveryman Dancing While Waiting For The Customer
LICK HERE

Hilarious Fake Snake Prank In Public
LICK HERE

Kiteboarder Gets Truly Shocked After Hitting A Humpback Whale
LICK HERE

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Find Sugar Babies
LICK HERE!!!!

MAKE ME RICH OFF THE BACK OF THESE CAM GIRLS
LICK HERE!!!!

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From the Forum

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Eva Longoria – Bikini at the beach in Marbella
LICK HERE

Lindsay Lohan – Disney Legends Awards Ceremony in Anaheim
LICK HERE

Julia Cavanagh – Honey Birdette lingerie Whitney Wisteria collection
LICK HERE

Charlotte Lawrence – Dinner at Giorgio Baldi in Santa Monica
LICK HERE

Kathryn Newton – Seen at her hotel in Paris
LICK HERE

Barbara Palvin – Anthropologie’s Anthro Saloon in Los Angeles
LICK HERE

Daisy Edgar-Jones -Twisters premiere in Seoul
LICK HERE

Freya Allan – Variety’s Power of Young Hollywood in Santa Monica
LICK HERE

Eiza Gonzalez – Bikini on a yacht in Ibiza
LICK HERE

Julianne Hough – Arriving for her book signing event in Los Angeles
LICK HERE

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From stepSMUT!!

(LINKS BELOW ARE NSFW!)
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Giulia Wylde Pulls Tits Out of a Nightie!
LICK HERE

WHAT SHALL THIS WEEK HOLD FOR US?
LICK HERE

Cleo K Cup Black Noir
LICK HERE

Cum Eater!
LICK HERE

Nude Legendary Babes
LICK HERE

Athena Fleurs Little Blonde Teenager Athena Can Get Anyone She Wants Naughty Mag
LICK HERE

8 PUBLIC ACTS THAT DEFINITELY MAKE YOU A WHORE
LICK HERE

Flashing In Public
LICK HERE

Heidi Klum Topless at the Beach in St. Barts!
LICK HERE

The Absolute Worst of Pornhub IX
LICK HERE

Bess Burton Vegas Vacay Zishy
LICK HERE

Johnny Moronic reviews the nudity in the Aussie/Kiwi films of 1998, Part 1
LICK HERE

Heidi Klum Goes Topless in Thong Bikini, Unleashes Sexy Instagram Video!
LICK HERE

Dominance and Submission: The Power Dynamics of Heavy Fetish
LICK HERE

Hottie Riding (GIF)
LICK HERE

Babi Rossi for Playboy Brazil!
LICK HERE

Well… That Was Unexpected
LICK HERE

Street Ass Eating!
LICK HERE

Monster XXXperiment (Sex Game)
LICK HERE

Jeny Smith Upskirt
LICK HERE

Angel Avril Flashing and Showing Off Her Big Naturals!
LICK HERE

These lesbian cuties really don’t let that baby oil go to waste
LICK HERE

BUSTED!
LICK HERE

Alexsis Faye A Bikini Day For Alexsis Faye Scoreland
LICK HERE

‘Lacy Duo’ with Katya And Smoky via Katya Clover Official
LICK HERE

Gabby d Barbosa shows off an impressive chest in Hellhounds (2024)
LICK HERE

Boundaries Explored: Navigating Consent and Safety in Heavy Fetish
LICK HERE

The Hair Matches the Dildo!
LICK HERE

Lady films her Slim friend getting hard threesome
LICK HERE

Kim Velez & Sofia Damon The Incredible Scoreland Pair
LICK HERE

Busty Lola Bredly via Met-Art
LICK HERE

Pool Fuck With Kona Jade!
LICK HERE

Busty Golfer Octavia Red!
LICK HERE

Slimy Samus (Sex Game)
LICK HERE

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Fuck Girls Who Are Out of Your League….
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Fuck Fleshlights, They’re Amazing
LICK HERE

Girls Girls Girls – Support These Cam Girls By Falling In Love With Them
LICK HERE!!!!

JOIN THE NEWSLETTER YOU ASSHOLES!

Posted in:stepLINKS

2024

12

Aug

Olivia Rodrigo is a Tennis Whore of the Day

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As it turns out, I have a tennis fetish.

The skimpy outfits, the sexual poses, the sexual moans and grunts, it’s a pretty sexual experience..

Plus, it a WASPY rich person sport, or was once a WASPY rich person sport, where the poor or ethnics couldn’t partake…and that level of exclusivity, brings on rebelling tennis daughters and tennis wives wanting to cheat on their tennis club husbands who are cheating on them with the other tennis club wives, or their secretaries, because who wants to fuck your own wife when you’re rich enough to fuck other pussy, so rich you can afford the tennis club…making for a lot of rich person fun….

It’s a far trashier and accessible sport now, but there’s still skimpy outfits, sexual poses, sexual grunts and it’s a pretty sexual experience while jerking off to it through the chainlink fence at the community tennis club during a friendly round robin….

Her name is Olivia Rodrigo and she’s a pop star.

Posted in:Olivia Rodrigo

2024

12

Aug

Victoria Justice Simulates Sex on the Beach with her Full Tits of the Day

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I wasn’t one of those Victoria Justice perverts when she was on TV. She’s a Nickelodeon star and I just don’t really do that whole thing. Not to mention, the Nickelodeon stars, despite being horny sluts willing to suck dick or let their producer suck their feed in exchange for that meal ticket, were always pretty boring to me.

Sure, they were the late teen, early 20 year olds pretending to be teens that were probably fucking more than any of the other young actors out there, but they were so corny while they were doing it.

So when people were jacking off to Victoria Justice and Ariana Grande was going to great heights as a fat shamer and thus American shamer, before being blown up at her concert that killed her ex boyfriend Mac Miller…..leaving Victoria Justice in her tail lights….

I was not looking at Justice’s tits….

I am currently looking at Justice’s tits…and they are fuller than I thought they’d be which works out nicely since her latest album drop, her first in a decade for the cash grab, is being marketed with bikini content…

Justice for Justice’s tits….is what I say….if I knew she had tits like this back then, I would have never bought all those Ariana grande fleshlights….

Justice for Justice’s tits!

Posted in:Victoria Justice

2024

12

Aug

Julianne Hough Promotes her Book in her Underwear of the Day

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I don’t know if anyone actually gives a fuck about Julianne Hough, but incest porn is super popular and we all assume she’s fucked her brother, so she matters.

I also know that the average retard American in their mold filled trailer park home, sucking on the Mountain Dew that they wish they could get an IV for, while losing their toes to diabetes, fucking LOVE her reality TV show and would probably buy her book even if “THEM BOOKS ARE HARD TO READS”, just to show some support…

What I like is that she’s a dancer and dancers are pretty slutty, all in-tune with their bodies, with muscle memory that can be applied to fucking…

I like that she’s got a hot fit body, even in her old age and that she’s a MORMON GONE WILD who has escaped her church and with that freedom went extreme on the other side of the morals and values chart.

She didn’t do porn, because she didn’t have to do porn, she got a Hit TV Show….but she did do her own kind of porn with RYAN SEACREST and that’s what matters….

She is promoting a book about being diddled as a Mormon dancer or some shit, at least that’s what I assume the book is about….

She’s promoting it by dancing in her underwear, either because she’s a slutty slutty whore, who is into her hot dance body…or because she knows her nude content does better than clothed content and she wants as much hype as she can get with it…because she’s a slutty slutty whore…

Posted in:Julianne Hough

2024

12

Aug

Taylor Swift Ass in her Concert Panties From Behind of the Day

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I’m the kind of guy who likes looking at a girl’s ass, so when she pivots her hips towards the sky, allowing her pussy to have more from behind visibility, I typically get excited.

I’ll admit that despite despising the witchcraft and manipulation of the minds of the masses brought on my the flacid sliced ham that is Taylor Swift and/or her handlers who present her to us as if she’s some kind of wonderful, I almost thought it was hot.

The zero sex appeal starlet who apparently fucks a lot because she needs material for her teen romance songs, despite being 40 years old, almost got me in….

The fact that she’s got three inch tights under her underwear is why they didn’t trap me, even thought the tights are probably better than her alligator blue web of veins white chicks get…coupled with the fact that it’s Taylor Swift….the Travis Kelce collector…

Luckily….she’s not fat…but that doesn’t really do much for her since through it all she’s still the stupidly popular Taylor Swift…

I’d still watch the sex tape though!

Posted in:Taylor Swift

2024

12

Aug

Medical Worker Monday of the Day

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All the racist, right wing, trad wife life, alpha male conspiracy theorists out there are saying that there is going to be another pandemic before the election, or a cyber attack, or an alien invasion, or a financial collapse, so that you can all live in the pods eating bugs under the new communist regime….

To which I say….make these healthcare workers HEROES again, and they’ll just keep on bringing the smut.

The nurse fetish is an old one, a good one, assuming you like women who change diapers and have pussies covered in MRSA..

So bring on that pandemic…we need a little excitement, free money, closed businesses, and a solid excuse to not socialize, or leave the house and stream all day while eating snacks..

Posted in:NURSES

2024

12

Aug

Lindsay Lohan’s Back of the Day

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In the greatest news in the history of news, during this dark and horrible 5 year news cycle, our girl Lindsay Lohan is back..

She’s clearly got a handle on her face injections, BOTOX treatments and overall wellbeing because the LEGEND is looking better than she has in a few decades.

For those of you who know, when I started this site it was at the early stages of the blog era of blogs, there were only one or two blogs outside of this one.

PerezHilton had just started, maybe JustJared existed, WWTDD.com was around and a couple of others…

Our crack team of experts thought that since Perez Hilton had Paris Hilton as their mascot, we’d do Lindsay Lohan. That’s was the extent of the thought process and a long and sordid love affair of me pretending to be obsessed with LOHAN began….

If you’re wondering, it’s a great strategy to

Since she moved away, married, had kids, opened a beach club, fell off from the Hollywood Machine, I’ve been consistent in saying that that girl will win an Oscar when she decides to make a comeback.

At the time, I was planning on being the person to pull her out of the gutter, to brush the soot off her face, to help cleanse her of all her baggage, to wash and cut her hair like a Pretty Woman meets Extreme Makeover….with a script I wrote for her in hand, because in this fantasy, I write Academy Award winning scripts…all to give her the part I wrote for her of a crackwhore survival story…sucking the right dicks out of the gutter….a story of redemption.

Since that never happened, I don’t know how to write and I forgot that as my plan because I’m very lazy and talentless, she’s doing Freaky Friday 2 with that dude Jamie Lee Curtis, which I am sure will be as shit as Freaky Friday 1 and no Oscars will be won…but this is a starting point.

Not that I’ve ever seen any Lohan movie besides The Canyons Prairie Home Companion – RIP Garrison Keillor a #MeToo victim no one noticed got #MeTooed…..but I know winning an Oscar is a load of bullshit and can be done…

So the point of the story, Lohan at 40 years old…is BACK.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan