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Jessel Pena is the Instagram Of The Day

Heather Graham’s Old Flat Ass in a Bikini of the Day

Em Rata Gets Called Out for Being a Titty Whore of the Day

Brie Larson in the Great Outdoors of the Day

Sloppy Katy Perry is Rehearsing her Awkward Dances of the Day

2021

Apr

Nina Agdal Thigh Gap of the Day

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You know what….Nina Agdal may be old, washed up, no longer an SI model…and she may have that long torso and forehead that I used to laugh at because I am a mean spirited fuck who thinks certain people are overrated and I feel I am entitled to that right…even if it may be seen as a hate crime because I saw she looks retarded and obviously retarded is banned as a word even though it actually means something and not necessarily a developmentally challenged person…but the fact is I like mentally handicapped people better than normals…they are more interesting, less fucking dumb and have more to offer the world than just another normal…chasing the Kardashians’ next product…jerking off to the same shit porn….you see I’ve never met a mentally challenged person I didn’t like….but I have met at least every person I’ve ever met and they’ve all been collectively the same disappointing piece of shit…so called Nina a Retard is actually offensive to good people who aren’t out there sugar babying their way through life..

So…I don’t take back what I said about her head….all these years….but I will say who fucking cares about her head her body is fucking rocking..

I mean this is someone earning her fucking keep….you know if you are going to SUGAR baby be responsible and be your hottest and I would argue this is her hottest despite knowing she’s 30s years old…

I mean….I like how subtle she is in her “just adjusting my hair for the camera…opps I am in a thong…”…..you know discreet shamelessness…..maybe prepping to get in on that ONLYFANS….I mean the money she would make off that would eliminate the need for that sugar daddy Christie Brinkley she lives off of….she would be her own boss….oh how feminist and exciting…

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Posted in:Nina Agdal

2021

Apr

The Ratio Tuesday of the Day

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The Ratio is scientific fact, there have been many studies and they all come back saying waist to hip ratio is when you find big hips on a smaller waist….so there’s enough science to say all you square bitches with waists bigger than hips are fucked…

BELIEVE ALL SCIENCE…..

I mean, DON’T BELIEVE all science because whoever is paying for any study is usually manipulating the results of the study….so that it reflects what is best for their business….The results are based on who is paying..

I see KETO diet people mad that the sugar industry made fat a bad thing in the 70s due to studies linking fat to heart disease so that people would use more sugar…now all these diabetic fucks eating coconut oil are realizing…maybe sugar is the enemy…and fuels cancer…when fats at least good fats…like those on the hips and not on the waist are everything…

STUDIES are all manipulated…so you can’t BELIEVE science…or the media or the government because they manipulate everything for narrative…but you can’t manipulate FACT even if people like to think they have “their own truths”….there is such thing as absolute truth but you can still turn that around and make it tell a different story..

SO basically believe nothing but the waist to hip ratio study…even if you’d get a hard on for square bitches with waists bigger than hips….the waist smaller than the hips will give you a better boner…

Now fuck off.

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Posted in:The Ratio

2021

Apr

Margaret Qualley Ass of the Day

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Margaret Qualley is the Qualley sister that isn’t the singer, but rather the actor, who landed a spot in Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, which I am sure was challenging considering her mom is Andie Macdowell which I am sure had nothing to do with her landing a role…I mean it’s not like she’s Uma Thurman’s daughter….which I am only saying because I thought Tarantino had a boner for Uma’s man hands….which is usually something dudes avoid because the handjobs can be humilating….”It’s that small?”….yes…IT IS THAT SMALL..

Anyway, her dad’s a money launderer…I mean tax evader…I mean Panama Based Developer…LOL….I guess that’s got nothing to do with anything….at least not when you’re looking at her picking her ass like a trucker at the truck stop after a bout of food poisoning stuck up in his hemorrhoids….if you know what I mean…

Her hot tattoos are likely not real tattoos but if they are…a great way to entertain the genderless people who fuck her from behind….I mean a tramp stamp you can read and be inspired by….you analyze that philopophy….of “Barely Maid” which I assume is in reference to her not making her bed cuz she has people who do that for her…rich kid shit…and “It is What It Is”…which is like “My Name is My Name”….at least in how accurate it is….because it is what it is…

Fuck off.

In conclusion…this could be a man’s ass too…so be warned…

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Posted in:Margaret Qualley

2021

Apr

Rowan Blanchard Bikini of the Day

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Rowan Blanchard is a Disney Kid from Boy Meets World the New Class, which was the same show that brought hype to Maitland Ward and allowed her to find sucker fanboys of her original performance to slowly encourage her and support her into taking big dick in porn…you know apparently Girl Meets World…which was Boy Meets World the New Class opened doors for people…

Rowan secured her position in the world because of the show and I thought she was tapping out of the whole acting thing when I found out she existed….since she was doing the half nude Brooklyn Hipster thing…but now that she’s on Snow Piercer, that’s probably part of the public persona and strategy these actors use to get seen, noticed, act or seem like real people to their fan base…because Disney put too much into creating them….

Works for me….

You know if you’re going to be coming of age on the internet for your fans, doing it in the SKIMPIEST microbikini or nude or half nude…is fucking awesome..

I remember when celebrities were secretive, untouchable…you had to talk to them through their management and a bikini pic meant some paparazzi renting a helicopter to drop into the resort and sift through the trash to find out what part of the resort they were at…only to snap off a few pics from 6 miles away on a zoom lens…and we could’t even post those because the paparazzi doesn’t like you doing that…

But now, it’s just given to you on instagram and whether you’re into Rowan, her show Snowpiercer, hipster new generation sexual revolutionaries….or not…you can’t help but appreciate that SKIMPY fucking bikini…

I wouldn’t say I am a fan of Rowan yet, but she’s growing on me….

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Posted in:Rowan Blanchard

2021

Apr

Tight Pant Tuesday of the Day

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Tight Pants May Be Everywhere, but since no one is allowed out of their houses here in Canada, I mean I don’t really know how true that is, as other places are opening up, but it’s definitely true enough because we’ve had a year of being reclusive freaks, something I’ve been doing for close to 20 years, and going outside to see all the tight pants in person is less exciting a concept than the photoshopped version these people put out of themselves as if it is their actual self..

That’s not to say that these tight pants are photoshopped, I like to pretend they are all as good as they’d be in person, it’s just you can’t believe anything you see on the internet IT IS ALL A LIE….and if you’ve seen a tight pant on someone you know in person and compared it to their online version…the online version will likely be better.

Either way…Tight pants are the new trend, the ultimate trend and you can stare at pussy through pants because of the trend which is the fashion we need in these exciting living behind the screen “ARE YOU A ROBOT”….FUCK YES I AM A ROBOT times…

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Posted in:Tight Pants

2021

Apr

Courtney Stodden Naked in a Creek of the Day

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I like to think that I am the dog you see on the side of the street humping the dead dog that was just hit by a car also on the side of the street in a seize the fucking day…you necrophiliac fuck…opportunity knocks you take it….kind of motherfucker…

But there was a time I was invited to Courtney Stodden’s Halloween party….and I didn’t go to the fucking Halloween party and this was when she was still at her tabloid peak, probably before she was into the solo sex tapes and shit….and that was me not being the dog humping the dead dog on the side of the street in a seize the fucking day situation…and it’s not like I had ever been invited anywhere before that or after that and here I was spitting in the face of opportunity…

Not that going to a Halloween party is a big deal or it would amount to anything…it’s not like Stodden had anyone important at her party or that I’d even have seen her at her party…It’s not that I was hoping for romance with Stodden, but sneaking into her panty drawer could have been life changing…so that makes her ridiculous novelty boobs all the better…or I could have made T-Shirts saying “I went to Stodden’s Halloween Party and You Didn’t”….which would probably make no one around me jealous because about 1% of people know who Stodden is or that she exists…but I do…and here she is.

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Posted in:Courtney Stodden

2021

Apr

Sabrina Carpenter Cleavage of the Day

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Sabrina Carpenter is not the daughter of Karen Carpenter, the fearless singer who died from a will to be thin….which is the passion most women should have when it comes to being skinny…because fat is disgusting…and we need to stop empowering and celebrating it…it’s pretty embarrassing…

Sabrina Carpenter is her own kind of singer regardless of not being related to the Carpenters, these things happen….and I am sure I wouldn’t like anything of her music, but that’s not saying much, I think this whole computer generated pop music shit is mind numbing and possibly the reason society gets number and dumber…there’s no reason why they wouldn’t include dog whistles in their songs like Josie and the Pussycats that tell people to buy shit they don’t need….without them even knowing it….

She’s got 25 million followers on Instagram has been a Disney Kid so she matters…and in mattering it is our duty to share her gyrating shoulders in some fluorescent tube lit prison… to help her with her marketing efforts and your weird 21 year old popster fetishes…you creep.

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Posted in:Sabrina Carpenter

2021

Apr

Olga Obumova Foot Fetish of the Day

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I guess this model named OLGA is an official IMG MODEL, at least in some Euro Markets, which means she’s a pretty top tier model compared to all the instagram models showing their buttholes for attention in hopes to one day be famous too….

She seems to be based out of SPAIN and I’ve never heard of her, at least not that I know of, but knowing me, I’ve probably written about her Eastern European ass a few times already, I’m too lazy to look because I truly feel all these people are interchangeable idiots chasing the same useless dream…and I just care about their hottest pics…

I do know that the name OLGA is zero sexy, even for Eastern European fetishists like myself, because Easter European girls and I guess Russians too produce the best content for social media…far better than their lame suburban mainstream middle of the road McDonalds’ eating american counterparts…

In this shoot..I am looking at the pussy mound…and you should too.

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Posted in:Olga Obumova

2021

Apr

Addison Rae Ass in a Bikini of the Day

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Addison Rae is the most recent scam to crawl out of a Chinese Spyware app that people should be terrified of, but instead say shit like “I’m tracked anyway”….or “I have nothing to hide”….or “I love an audience so if that audience is an app watching my every move and reading all my texts and emails while showing me content based on my facial expressions as I watch the content on the apps because we forget that our phones have a front facing camera, so be it..”…..you know people need their loser idiot dancing for 15 second videos to survive….it’s pretty pathetic, but a hilarious warfare tactic..

ANYWAY…Addison Rae, for whatever reason is the biggest deal or close to the biggest deal on TikTok and the Kardashians moved, or bought her soul, or who fucking knows…it’s hard to accept that they are sent from hell since they are the worst thing to happen in the world in recent years….and now this one is whoring out, in bikini, showing big Louisiana ass while her dad signed to a talent agency in attempts to be the next Brad Pitt, because it takes a fame whore to raise a fame whore….and in being the biggest fame whore she’s getting paid…

You see she’ not JUST being used by the cryptkeeper Kardashians to keep themselves relevant, they’re also making money together…

I don’t find this hot, cankle culture isn’t my culture….but arched back in a bikini screams whore…so enjoy…

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Posted in:Addison Rae

2021

Apr

Tiny Tits Tuesday of the Day

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I like to celebrate Tiny Tits, because Tiny Tits are hot, usually on a hot body, with a hot ass, unless it’s the fat chick with Tiny Tits who is really just a genetic practical joke, even in this Don’t Shame Me, Body Positivity Era those empowered fatties know they are fatties and that they aren’t hot and that if they don’t have tits they are irrelevant fat people because the only redeeming quality of a fat chick is her tits…and I guess maybe her dick sucking abilities but those have likely dwindled now that they get laid like hot chicks thanks to dating apps…

THERE was a time that fat girls gave the best head…maybe the oral fixation that got them fat in the first place or the excitement of having a dick in their mouth when typically ignored by dicks….because dicks were only into them when drunk enough at 3 am after the bars closed…but now they are all “I’m hot, look at me in this bikini”…when back then they didn’t make bikinis in that size…AS THEY SHOULDN’T…

Point being, this isn’t about fat chicks, it’s about tiny tits, and tiny tits are as hot as big tits, size really doesn’t matter when it comes to tits, and any girl out there feeling shame about her manageable nicely shaped little tits is just bullshit insecurity….

So the empowering has been misdirected to gross fat chicks, when it should be directed at hot girls with small tits so that they don’t get fake tits…

SAVE SMALL TITS…that my kind of activism.