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Archive for the Top Category

2009

23

Sep

Aubrey O’Day and Holly Madison Go Topless in Vegas for Peepshow of the Day

(HAD TO REMOVE THE PICTURES)

Everyone get excited, 2 whores with fake tits you have probably already seen topless before, because they are whores with fake tits, who you only know because they are whores with fake tits, are staring in some bullshit called Peepshow that other whores with fake tits have been a part of in the past few months like Mel B and got knows who else because tracking Vegas shows isn’t a hobby of mine, are topless and these are the pics….

But you’d still fuck the two of them even if it involved just fucking yourself to pics of them, so enjoy.

Posted in:Aubrey O'Day|Holly Madison|Peepshow|Top|Vegas

2009

06

Apr

Lauren Conrad Does a Bikini With Her Boyfriend of the Day

Phony actress Lauren Conrad brought her boyfriend out to the beach and shit changed my fucking life. Actually it didn’t. It just reminded me that someone so much more useless than pretty much anyone I know can be so much more successful and well-received by the general public, despite being average at best in looks and substance, but I guess that’s just the world we’re livin’ in, at least it’s going to end in 2012, at least that’s what I read, and that means I only have a couple more years before seeing all these fuckers die, because as you know, I will survive the apocalypse, because I’m a cockroach, I just don’t have much of a cock.

Posted in:Bikini|Lauren Conrad|Top

2008

23

Jul

Gabrielle Reece Rock’s a Bikini Top and Show’s Some Tit’s of the Day

So I just happened to come across this comment on a previous post by some loser named Doug. This is what Doug wrote:

When you say “Traci Bingham and her Melon’s of the Day” what you are really saying is “Traci Bingham and her Melon is of the Day”
Go back to grade school you moron.

Doug. No, I’m not trying to say that her melon is of the day, but I am trying to be like hip hop and create my own kind of speaking that kids everywhere will rip off. I have no problem reinventing the language and making it work for me one post at a time. I don’t really have the patience to care about proper and constrictive and boring use of the english language, they shit is for the suburban people who do what they are told and don’t know how to live unless it’s in a guideline rulebook.

The fact that you would spell check posts on my site, let alone any fucking site leads me to believe that you just can’t let loose and appreciate the big picture, who really cares if I slip up on a you’re and your, their and there, melon’s or melons, you should learn how to read past typos and get the overall concept behind the post instead of going to the trouble to email me or comment about me, calling me a moron about the shit like you’re my fucking English teacher who I tried to poison in High School for pulling the same stunt. I am not educated, I am an immigrant, I have lived on the street, but throwing in an apostrophe wasn’t really representative of that, because even an uneducated person knows the fuckin’ difference, and it’s really got nothing to do with being a moron and more to do with not editing posts no one reads, except for maybe the occasional hater like you.

Either way, it doesn’t really matter, I just get annoyed when people bother me with instructions and point out typos, not because it makes me feel inadequate, but it reminds me that this site reaches the people I don’t really want it to.

Here are some pictures of Gabrielle Reece showing off her Beach Volleyball tits like shit was the early 90s. I never liked her, I always thought she looked too much like a dude and have had some weird nightmares of her and Brooke Shield’s slapping dicks, but dick or not, she does have tits in a bikini top and is staying true to her hangin’ on the beach past with her big wave surfing husband, legendary Laird Hamilton, and I guess I gotta stay true to my shit and post it.

Posted in:Bikini|Gabrielle Reece|Tits|TitsGabrielle Reece|Top

2007

27

Nov

I am – Bethany Hamilton Bikini Top Pictures of the Day

bethany_hamilton_top.jpg

I am not sure if this girl is 18 yet, but she’s rockin’ a bikini top and a bikini top at any age is worth talking about, except maybe when it’s on a 6 year old, because that shit creeps me the fuck out. It’s parents who let their kids where bikinis at 6, who book bikini wax appointments at 14 and who become grandparents when the kid is 16.

Now if you don’t know who Bethany Hamilton is, she’s a surf prodigy who got eaten by a shark right before she was about to go pro and survived, unfortunately for her, her arm didn’t and although that’s a sad story, shit’s better than being dead and if she’s right handed I bet she barely notices shit’s gone. Reality is that girls think dudes get grossed out by their flaws or shit that they are insecure about, but dudes are horny and the only way they won’t bang you is if you don’t have a vagina in which case they’ll just use the mouth. If they get constant sex, they’ll probably marry you, so no matter what’s wrong with you and no matter how fat your ass is, or how meaty your vagina is, or how obscure your third nipple is, people see past that shit when they are sexually satisfied. So maybe Bethany Hamilton is missing an arm, but she survived a shark attack and that’s more gangster than you’ll ever be. Not to mention, but I’ll mention it anyway, because saying not to mention than writing something confuses me, but not to mention, I am sure there are a ton of benefits of having a girl with one arm, like never being asked to hold hands in public when she’s carrying something, or always winning at pattycake, videogames, doing handstands and making gang signs.


Related Posts:

Some CSI Chick Named Jorja Fox Not Hot Surfing
Courntey Cox is Not Hot When Surfing
Jennifer Aniston is Paddle Surfing Cuz She’s a Fag
Elle Macpherson is Hot With a Surfboard

Posted in:Bethany Hamilton|Bikini|Surf|Top|Unsorted

2007

07

Sep

I am – Kelly Rowland Bikini Pictures of the Day

kelly_rowland_bikini_top.jpg

I’ve decided to post these pictures of Kelly Rowland in a bikini top because you like girls in bikini tops even if the pictures are shit and the person in the pictures is some washed up nobody who happened to be in Beyonce’s band as a back-up dancer who got way more respect than most back-up dancers ever do because they let her sing along to Beyonce’s songs and because Beyonce’s dad was molesting her or someshit and this was the only way to shut her up.

They should have named the band Beyonce’s Child because that’s pretty much how the other girls must feel having been back burnered and left out to dry up and fade away like the numerous abortions Beyonce may or may not have had.

In all reality, I feel bad for the chick and that’s the reason I am posting this. I am surprised someone cared enough to even take this pictures, I can only assume they weren’t taken by paparazzi but by her mom and released to the internet like she was Vanessa Hudgens in hopes of having some kind of comeback or second wind, but the only wind she’s got is the wind on her back that is keeping her walking down the beach away from any fame she once had and if you’re wondering where she’s pointing, it’s at God for spiting her by giving her the taste of glory then taking that shit away like some practical joke.


Related Posts:

Beyonce Tit Flash on Stage Video
Beyonce’s Bathing Suit Ass Pictures
Beyonce on the Cover of SI Swimsuit Edition
Beyonce’s See Through Shirt With Nipples Pictures

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Kelly Rowland|Legs|Shorts|Tits|Top|Unsorted

2007

29

Aug

I am – Anna Kournikova’s Bikini Top of the the Day

anna_kournikova_bikini2.jpg

I found gum on the street today that was still half wrapped and I was fucking excited because the first thing I thought to myself was that I didn’t have to brush my teeth today and anything that gets me out of boring hygiene practices that are totally outdated is fine by me. Enough with my good news….

I came across these pictures of Anna Kournikova eating in a bikini top and I didn’t know whether they were old or new, but figured I sure as hell better post them before my 2 readers who I hate lash-out on me…

I went to the strip club last night because there are serious deals on drinks on monday night, I always call it hurtbag mondays because the people in the place are just as fucking desperate as the girls working…I am talking the ugliest of the ugly strippers are there trying to make ends meet because the weekend didn’t work out too well for them because no one got a dance.

The most amazing thing happened when I got there. All the prime bitches were out working, the college kids were back in town and showing their new found friends what strippers in this city are like and that’s when I realized it was Tuesday, and that I missed hurtbag Monday by a day and that depressed me more than I thought it would. The only real hurtbags in the place were a group of fat chicks who showed up an hour before closing to land some already primed guys they knew were leaving blue-balled. I guess deep down inside I feel at home on hurtbag monday.

I can only assume your life is even more depressing because you read about mine so here is some Anna Kournikova emotionally eating her way into a size 14 for you.

Related Posts

Anna Kournikova Bikini Top Pictures
Anna Faris’ Short Shorts Pictures
Serena Williams Lookin Like Jessica Biel in a Bikini

Posted in:Anna Kournikova|Bikini|Eating|Tennis|Tits|Top|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

29

Aug

I am – Anna Kournikova's Bikini Top of the the Day

anna_kournikova_bikini2.jpg

I found gum on the street today that was still half wrapped and I was fucking excited because the first thing I thought to myself was that I didn’t have to brush my teeth today and anything that gets me out of boring hygiene practices that are totally outdated is fine by me. Enough with my good news….

I came across these pictures of Anna Kournikova eating in a bikini top and I didn’t know whether they were old or new, but figured I sure as hell better post them before my 2 readers who I hate lash-out on me…

I went to the strip club last night because there are serious deals on drinks on monday night, I always call it hurtbag mondays because the people in the place are just as fucking desperate as the girls working…I am talking the ugliest of the ugly strippers are there trying to make ends meet because the weekend didn’t work out too well for them because no one got a dance.

The most amazing thing happened when I got there. All the prime bitches were out working, the college kids were back in town and showing their new found friends what strippers in this city are like and that’s when I realized it was Tuesday, and that I missed hurtbag Monday by a day and that depressed me more than I thought it would. The only real hurtbags in the place were a group of fat chicks who showed up an hour before closing to land some already primed guys they knew were leaving blue-balled. I guess deep down inside I feel at home on hurtbag monday.

I can only assume your life is even more depressing because you read about mine so here is some Anna Kournikova emotionally eating her way into a size 14 for you.

Related Posts

Anna Kournikova Bikini Top Pictures
Anna Faris’ Short Shorts Pictures
Serena Williams Lookin Like Jessica Biel in a Bikini

Posted in:Anna Kournikova|Bikini|Eating|Tennis|Tits|Top|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

20

Aug

I am – Mena Suvari Bikini Top of the Day

mena_suvari_top.jpg

Here are some more pictures of Mena Suvari in a bikini top because she likes to spend time on the beach and I like to post pictures of girls on the beach, because that is what my life has come to….

I am not going to say bitch is a dyke now that she’s shaved off all her head and bleached it blond, because I don’t think a shaved head makes a girl a lesbian, it just makes her look like one and that’s not enough proof for me to make fun of that.

I will say that I do have a thing for lesbians, not the lipstick kind who are basically hot girls that become even hotter because they don’t let dudes up in them and because they hate men so much they won’t even acknowledge our presence. I am into the full fledge hormonally masculine lesbians that sit around in their cargo pants and combat boots waiting to go shop for organic vegetables or to beat the fuck out of any man they see objectify a woman by ripping off their dicks and feeding it to them. The reason I like those kind of lesbians is because they hate guys like me and I guess you always like what you can’t have, like a lesbian friend to teach you how to bench press properly or how to tie that flannel shirt around your overalls so that you look mean….

The only real lesbian contact I ever had was in the 90s when every girl I dated got fed up with me after about a month and since I poorly represented men, then all turned dyke. For a while I was convinced that it was a curse I had. That I was such a bad fuck that they were turned off of men for life, so I just ran with that and used it as a pick-up line. I’d tell girls in bars that I had the power of turning them dyke and they found it so funny that they ended up taking me up on it to see if I really was as bad as I said I was….I never disappoint so I added more women to the lesbian population than all the dads who molested their daughters growing up and for that I’d like some kind of recognition on International Lesbian day….

Related Posts:

Mena Suvari Bikini Pictures
Mena Suvari Showing Off Her Ass
Mena Suvari Topless Beac

Posted in:Bald|Bikini|Mena Suvari|Tits|Top|Unsorted