I'll Make You Famous…
 
 

2015

13

Jul

Jessica Alba’s Wet Selfie of the Day

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Jessica Alba wore what looks like a sheer when wet bikini top for her instagram…because Jessica Alba still wants you to think she matters, is still hot, because her start-up, that is really no longer a start-up, rely on her being the trophy wife and mother to sell their product, but more importantly, you know when she steps down with all her money when they sell to some big corporation she pretends to be fighting in her organic war on chemicals in products, and she has all the money in the world, her ego is going to force her to go back to acting, this time on a quest to get that Academy Award, because financially she won’t need to rely on that career, and can go back to the original art of acting she fell in love with while studying it at the conservatory…and by conservatory I mean doing the shitty fucking movies that don’t matter…

ALl this to say, she’ll be naked in those movies, we just have to wait it out another 4 years.

Posted in:Jessica Alba|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Olivia Jordan is Miss USA from Oklahoma and an Blue Movie Actress of the Day

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We all know two very basic things…the first is that any Pageant is a fucking scam for strippers who are too Christian to strip to try to either get a free education or get some press so that they have a long lasting career as an actor, or model, or whatever….

Normally, the Pageant girls are cheesy as fuck, not all that hot and just kind of desperate cocktail waitress types…

We also know that Hollywood is a pretty hard place to break into. If you go to LA, you’ll see amazing fucking girls everywhere you look, 99 percent of them are not working actresses or models, but rather just instagram whores who have sugar daddies, the guys who run Hollywood, and /or the occassional 1000 dollar campaign or promo model appearance…all while trying to break out…and be the star they know they are…

So it would only make sense that a girl like Olivia Jordan, who won Miss Usa las night, would move to LA to try to get famous because she knows or feels she’s a talent, hell she joined Miss USA after failing in Hollywood and won it…so she’s obviously got an ego, confidence, or delusions…and I guess it was a good strategy, because before Miss USA, her Hollywood legacy was shoving her vagina in some dude’s face….for some movie called Murder in the First…probably her only career..

So Miss USA brings the lessons to the next generation as a positive leader to the youth…that if you move to Hollywood and get a gig that requires sex and nudity, do it because you have rent to pay and when it doesn’t lead to better opportunity or jobs..join Miss USA…

I guess what I am saying is that they are all fucking hookers, actors, models, pageant girls…anyone using their bodies to get rich….and I don’t mind watching…

Posted in:Olivia Jordan|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Ana Beatriz Barros for L’Officiel Russia of the Day

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Ana Beatriz Barros is a Brazilian who has done some shit for Sports Illustrated, Vicotria’s Secret and a bunch of other shit over the last few decades as a model. She started at 16….shit

She’s 6 foot tall, 32, and I guess still trying to prove that not all 6 foot tall Brazilians have penises…it’s her life work…

There was a minute when Ana Beatriz Barros was all the rage…you know doing Victoria’s Secret….back in the early 2000s…but I guess that was a while ago…even if it seems to have been a lifetime ago…

But she doesn’t seem to be out of practice in wearing a bikini in an erotic way….because it requires very little talent, anyone can do it, just check out instagram, it’s easy…and one of the worlds best scams before instagram overthrew it…

Now all we need to do is prove that acting is a scam, and my work here will be done…and what better way to wait for that to happen than to look at old, tall model tits with nipples for a magazine…like it was 14 years ago…

Posted in:Ana Beatriz Barros

2015

13

Jul

Nicky Hilton Wedding Upskirt of the Day

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Apparently Nicky Hilton got married this past weekend, I can assume no one cared, there was no real buzz around it, because she’s always been the quiet, less interesting sister in the shadow of her evil sister Paris, but I guess that doesn’t mean she couldn’t take a lesson from her sister, in one last attempt to make some noise and say “Hey Look At Me”…since she know the wedding alone wasn’t good enough….so she flashed her panties in typical Hilton fashion…only I guess in Paris’ case,her panties are more toxic and sometimes made of labia…..

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Nicky Hilton|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Ashley Tisdale is Slutty for Some Photoshoot of the DAy

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Ashley Tisdale is a girl I’ve slandered for a long time and I really had no reason for it…I guess I just feel the need to slander girls who are over-celebrated, when I don’t think they deserve to be celebrated…..like when I looked at her face years ago and saw her win a Teen Choice award or an MTV award….or maybe it was an Oscar for her great acting…and for being “the hottest girl of the year”…and I just said “attack these media lies”….you see I don’t go after big pharma, or corporations, or even Facebook for distracting and dividing us so that we don’t make progress in the world, or have the government admit to Aliens..I go after actors who I don’t find hot…but who win awards for being hot…because that’s a nobel fight worth fighting…right?

Well, it turns out that making fun of her was just a shitty, boring angle, when I should just stare at her little tits…because who cares about a bad face if the girl isn’t fat…Words of wisdom to live by…

All this to say…this is the kind of work I think all girls should partake in…

Posted in:Ashley Tisdale|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Charlotte McKinney Going to the Gym of the Day

Everyone’s favorite bootleg hooters girls from South Florida with the tits…was working out for the Paparazzi, because she’s at the level of famous that call the paparazzi, it’s the only way she has managed to get to this level of relevance…which is really not any level of relevance…if you ask anyone…they probably won’t know who she is…unless they are white trash who watch Dancing with the Stars…or dudes who visit sites like this…who like really big tits…tits so big that they make her garbage face disappear…

She has done very little career wise, she wasn’t a star when Dancing With the Stars Cast her, it was just part of the lie that she is probably paying someone whether through sex or through sex…to set up for her..

This set up for the paparazzi is so fucking weak, but bit tits, short shorts, lean body…bent over…works..even if Charlotte McKinney doesn’t and never has.

TO SEE THE REST CLICK HERE

Posted in:Charlotte McKinney|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Courtney Stodden Body Painted at Comicon of the Day

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Courtney Stodden obvious, desperate, embarrassing attention seeker who gets naked, even though she’s not really hot, but rather older than she pretends to be, with stupid bolt on tits, in what I guess is a drug induced level of crazy, thinking this will help her “career”…when really it just sort of makes a clown out of her…

But then again…she doesn’t really have a career…She was the teen bride of a d-lister…and I would say that it’s really too bad that girls want to be famous so bad that they do such nonsense stunts to get noticed…but I love the nonsense stunts..they make me laugh..and they allow me to see her nipples…Which isn’t really a life goal….or a big dealsince I’ve watched her masturbate in her “sex tape”…that has no sex in it…because when your only option is a sex tape…since no one cares about you…go for it…

TO SEE ALL THE PICS CLICK HERE

TO SEE HER SEX TAPE CLICK HERE

All this to say, my biggest fail was not going to her Halloween party years ago…

Posted in:Courtney Stodden

2015

13

Jul

Kristen Stewart Thighs for Marie Claire of the Day

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Kristen Stewart was rumored to be a lesbian, thanks to her mom saying she’s a lesbian…

I can’t imagine anyone being shocked, you know with the fact that she looks like she’d be a lesbian…but not any lesbian, the kind of lesbian who wears a strap on dick so that she can feel like she has a cock every time she grabs her crotch lesbian…that or some inbred, unshowered hick who has been fucked by her dad as it is their family tradition…which I am not sure whether the two are related or not…but let’s just assume they are….

Well, here’s her upper thigh for Marie Claire, the same upper thigh she either wraps around her bitch’s neck and/or that she uses to scissor with…because lesbians only have two moves…

Posted in:Kristen Stewart|SFW

2015

13

Jul

Tiffany Trump is the Future of the Day

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Tiffany Trump is the Trump that no one pays attention to, despite being the one who is still 21 and making noise around herself, and not just with her shitty song:

But with her Instagram modeling, that has led her to hang out with other LA rich kids, who go by the name “rich kids of instagram”….because Trumps are always classy like that…you know shameless, loud, flaunting assholes who like to brag because American Royalty is still white trash…obviously…

I always encourage the future President’s daughters to post butt shots on the internet, but I guess I encourage all girls to post butt shots on the internet, and when your mom is Marla Maples, a Gold Digger, like so many Gold Diggers before her, you’re a little more Kim Kardashian…than you are anything else..

That said, her body is good, her face mangled…a little chin implant, or maybe it is dental work, is all she needs to be the kind of girl I would pay 50 dollars to plug my skinny tea product on her social media…

All this to say, who cares about washed up Ivanka…Tiffany is the future and she’s already got the obnoxious stripper name for it…I’m in love

Posted in:SFW|Tiffany Trump

2015

13

Jul

Looking Up Demi Lovato’s Skirt of the Day

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Demi Lovato posted a couple of slutty pics to instagram…I mean they are barely slutty compared to the other things on instagram, and probably barely slutty when compared to other things Demi Lovato has done throughout her career, but probably slutty enough for anyone who thinks Demi Lovato is hot or someone who you would want to see up their skirt…

I don’t know if that is Wilmer, her boyfriend and celebrity tween de-virginizer hired by the Disney execs to break in the girl so they don’t feel so bad about it…but I do know that I’ve heard rumors that she’s a huge lesbian, which is not shocking based on the fact that she looks like a lesbian…

That’s all I have to say about that.

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TO SEE SOME PICS OF HER IN A CROP TOP – GOD KNOWS WHY YOU’D WANT TO – CLICK HERE

Posted in:Demi Lovato|SFW