Danielle Lloyd Archives - Page 2 of 2 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

31

Oct

I am – Danielle Lloyd's Halloween Ass of the Day

I don’t really know if these Danielle Lloyd pictures are new or old, mainly because I don’t spend that much of my time thinking about Danielle Lloyd or following her non-existant career, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. I am not trying to imply that I’ve got better things to do with my time because I don’t, but I like to think just sitting and staring at the wall is more interesting than keeping tabs on this slut, except that this slut shows up to events the way all girls should show up to events, everyday of the week and all my wall does is stare right back at me.

They say this is her on Halloween, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this was her on everyday of the week, her half naked body is what makes her money, so it’s kinda her job to dress like this, now make it your job to look at it, because we all know it’s better than your last job bagging groceries that you got fired from because it was too complicated for you to figure out. Don’t worry, I don’t think you’re a loser, everyone else probably does, but not me. Cuddles.

Related Posts:

Danielle Lloyd Skis and Bikinis…
Danielle Lloyd’s Hairy Armpits
Danielle Lloyd’s Bikini Ass
Danielle Lloyd Flashes Her Ass

2007

31

Oct

I am – Danielle Lloyd’s Halloween Ass of the Day

1 Comment »

I don’t really know if these Danielle Lloyd pictures are new or old, mainly because I don’t spend that much of my time thinking about Danielle Lloyd or following her non-existant career, but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t. I am not trying to imply that I’ve got better things to do with my time because I don’t, but I like to think just sitting and staring at the wall is more interesting than keeping tabs on this slut, except that this slut shows up to events the way all girls should show up to events, everyday of the week and all my wall does is stare right back at me.

They say this is her on Halloween, but I wouldn’t be surprised if this was her on everyday of the week, her half naked body is what makes her money, so it’s kinda her job to dress like this, now make it your job to look at it, because we all know it’s better than your last job bagging groceries that you got fired from because it was too complicated for you to figure out. Don’t worry, I don’t think you’re a loser, everyone else probably does, but not me. Cuddles.

Related Posts:

Danielle Lloyd Skis and Bikinis…
Danielle Lloyd’s Hairy Armpits
Danielle Lloyd’s Bikini Ass
Danielle Lloyd Flashes Her Ass

2007

24

Oct

I am – Danielle Lloyd Likes Skiing in Bikinis of the Day

1 Comment »

All this losing all my money shit’s killing me. I think I just shat out my liver or something that looked like my liver. It’s either stress or the ebola virus, either way I am fucked. But I figured you shouldn’t suffer because I am suffering. We only have a limited time together, so I gotta make the best of it. That’s how much I like you and because corporate america can take my money but they can’t take my funny, or my bad poetry….

I have been hustling facebook the last couple of days and I came across a comment from some girl I don’t know that said she got a 63% on her test so I wrote:

I hope it wasn’t your “What you look like naked” test…cuz that would be depressing. Based on your pics, I woulda given you at least a 65%…baby…

So do you come here often?

Love

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

Either way, here are some pictures of:Danielle Lloyd, doing what she does, which is pretty much rock a bikini everywhere she goes, even to the ski hill, because that’s how committed she is to her useless career that’s only going to last another 15 lbs or 5 years, whichever comes first, so she’s gotta bank everything she can, it’s gotta last her a lifetime.

Related Posts:

Danielle Lloyd is a Hairy Armpit Lesbian
Danielle Lloyd Ass Flash
Danielle Lloyd Green Bikini Wedgie
Danielle Lloyd’s Bad Ass in a White Bikini

Posted in:Bikini|Danielle Lloyd|Skiing|Slut|Unsorted

2007

04

Oct

I am – Danielle Lloyd is a Hairy Armpit Lesbian of the Day

1 Comment »

Here are some pictures of some slut you’ve all jerked off to rockin’ some hairy fucking armpits. I don’t understand what these pics are from or if it’s some kind of joke, but I don’t find it funny because I fucking hate hairy armpits on chicks and I remember the first time I ever saw a hairy armpit on a chick, it was when I was a kid of maybe 9 years old. She was a 65 year old midget who rolled her own cigarettes and for some reason picked me up after school for a few months. She had blocks of wood on her car’s gas and brake pedals and a phonebook on her seat. I am not even making this shit up. It was during the beginning of summer when she decided to wear some kind of tank top shit and I looked over at her and she smiled at me and I saw the fuckin armpit hair and gagged. She probably hadn’t shaved in decades and the shit was thicker than my wife’s labia and wet from sweat and I just lost it and threw the fuck up.

Since then, I’ve met lesbians and hippies and feminists and environmentalists and people who don’t wear shoes and shit like that and whenever I see a bitch rockin’ armpit hair I think of my hairy midget and freak the fuck out and whenever the chick is hot or has some kind of potential of being hot and I see that shit it ruins her. It’s like this time I was with this really hot chick with these legs that never ended and as I worked my way up to her box and moved her underwear aside, I saw testicles and had to PEACE THE FUCK OUT. Ok that never happened, but it could have happened and if it did I am sure armpit hair would be the least of my worries….but you get the fuckin’ point that Danielle Lloyd may have been some kind of slut sex symbol from the UK because she was Miss England, but this armpit hair move is obviously some kind of obscure self-destructive behavior because it pretty much takes everything she worked for and throws it all down the toilet and all it took was a couple weeks to grow that shit out. I guess it’s not as bad for you as dying of a drug overdose.

Related Posts:

Danielle Lloyd Ass Flash
Danielle Lloyd in a Leopard Print Bikini
Danielle Lloyd in a White Bikini
Danielle Lloyd in an Expensive Bikini

Posted in:Armpits|Danielle Lloyd|Hair|Natural|Unsorted

2007

27

Sep

I am – Danielle Lloyd Ass Flash Pictures of the Day

2 Comments »

I saw these picture of Danielle Lloyd the other day and wasn’t too impressed, because the ass flash picture wasn’t released. I don’t remember who she is, probably from Big Brother UK but I do know that she’s one of those chicks who constantly exposes herself and when I see her name in the boards I rip my pictures off of, usually means a guaranteed post…

Reality is that I like slutty lookin girls who dress in revealing clothes. I like girls who show off their bodies and don’t wear panties. I like being with girls who like to flash their bodies and their body parts discreetly even though they usually suck in bed, but watching other guys get hard over them is a total power trip. Unfortunately that hasn’t happened since I got one of my chicks to not wear panties one night and discreetly expose the shit, but that was a long fucking time ago….

I also like girls who like sex. So I spent the last hour sitting on a park bench outside a maternity store. I do this sometimes because I like to let the girls know that I know what they’ve been up to by giving them dirty looks or creepy smirks. In my head I think to myself how that bitch let a dude bust nut inside her and smile and I know she knows I know she let some dude bust in her and that in a few months so will the rest of the world….it’s kinda like she’s released a sex tape or has starred in a porn flick that I’ve never seen, but I still know she was in it.

Here are those Danielle Lloyd pics.

Related Posts:

Danielle Lloyd Interracial Bikini Pictures
Danielle Lloyd Expensive Bikini Pictures
Danielle Lloyd Fat Ass Bikini Pictures
Danielle Lloyd Green Bikini Pictures

2007

28

Aug

I am – Danielle Lloyd Bikini Pictures of the Day…

2 Comments »

I don’t know when these were taken, but they seem to be doing the internet rounds today and being the slowest fucking blog to update, I figured I might as well post them. Her name is Danielle Lloyd, she’s pretty much useless unless you sell bikinis, because she is always in fucking bikinis and because I don’t know who she is, but then again I have no idea who anyone is, I also had no idea that Owen Wilson tried to kill himself yesterday, I had no idea that Carmen Electra was white, and I think I started feeling the anxiety of being a total hack, or like that the pressure was on or some shit because I ended up dreaming that I was at some party with all the other bloggers and no one would talk to me, I would just sit there getting wasted and yelling at random people as they passed by while a group of guys in the other room sat and played nintendo and guitar. It was the closest thing I had to a gay dream in years, there were no girls, just blown up laminated posters of some of their most famous posts, like the Jessica Alba bikini ass on all fours picture and shit.

Either way, I am a hack, I am just waking up, this is Danielle Lloyd and I am not a gay blogger, and if I was invited to one of their get-togethers which I wouldn’t be, because they don’t consider me one of them, I wouldn’t go, and if I did go, I’d bring a crackwhore to piss randomly in random placed when I got bored, on demand, ideally a stinky fucking pee on the couch just to scare the virgins a bit.

So the life lesson is that I will not take a night off of drinking and I will keep ripping off other blogs so that they continue hating me…so that I don’t become one of them…

Related Posts
Danielle Lloyd in a Pink Animal Print Bikini
Danielle Lloyd White Bikini
Danielle Loydd in a Bikini for Cancer
More Danielle Lloyd In a Bikini, It Seems to Be All Bitch Does

Posted in:Ass|Bikini|Danielle Lloyd|Tits|Unsorted

2007

16

Jul

I am – Danielle Lloyd Bikini Pics of the Day

2 Comments »

Danielle Lloyd Bikini on Beach

By Hollywood standards, Danielle Lloyd is fat fucking cow who needs to loose weight, and thatâ€™s pretty sad, cause I think her body is slamming.

I hate giving in to this stupid thinness thing, but to be honest, I do and I hate myself for it. I donâ€™t judge other people tho, just myself. I donâ€™t mean to sound all after school special but this low body weight thing being perpetuated in Hollywood and the media is seriously starting to fuck with young girls, me being one of them. I donâ€™t have an eating disorder or anything, but I basically feel guilty after anytime I eat and my version if dieting is basically just not eating at all.

I should really write a book or something about it so at least if I get some easting disorder and die, I can do so rich and rolling around in a big pile of money. You donâ€™t need pills to loose to weight, nor do you need to even work out. All you need to is drill it into you head that nothing tastes as good as being thin feels, and watch the pounds melt I away.

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I am â€“ Danielle Lloyd Bikini Pics of the Day
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I am â€“ Danielle Lloyd Bikini Pics of the Day
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Posted in:Bikini|Danielle Lloyd|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

15

Jun

I am – Danielle Lloyd Bikini Pictures of the Day

2 Comments »

I am getting bored of posting bikini pictures. I am thinking because they aren’t that inspiring and all I can really say is shit like “look at those tits” or “check out that ass” and it’s boring. You’d think that lookin’ at pictures of a slut half naked would get me all pumped to write some story about a bitch I once fucked who liked wearing bikinis or some other random shit, but I think I’ve said all I can say for the week about bikinis. I am more into seeing the slut first hand and watching her move in real life is a little more my thing. Pictures are boring and the equivalent of saying you’re rather check out pictures of a girl posing naked than actually being in the room with her posing naked. Regardless, I am compelled to throw these up because it is what I do and I know that’s why you come to the site and I am really all about pleasing you. I actually don’t really give a fuck about you or what you think but I figured it’s nicer to pretend that I do.

I went to the pool on Monday where the strippers hang out all day and I should be there today but I am convinced the heat is going to kill me. They always warn the weak and old to stay in on days like today and I figure that I am a bit of both and that since I don’t want to die I’ll just stick to my computer. When I was there all the girls seemed to think they were Paris/Lohan/celebrities as they sipped their cocktails in bikinis and I realized that if you venture out of your house, you don’t need sites like mine. I rely heavily on you being a reclusive asshole and I guess I should thank you for that.

It’s also nice to see that a bitch is so self sufficient that she can be out in her bikini at least 10 times this last month, rubbing it in all our faces that we suck at life.

Posted in:Bikini|Danielle Lloyd|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2007

08

Jun

I am – Danielle Lloyd in an Expensive Bikini for Cancer of the Day

58 Comments »

I use the Internet too much. I feel like my last love affair was with an emoticon banner on myspace and it was the best sex Ive ever had because all the slut would say is “hellllooooo” over and fucking over again and couldn’t get me hard by still whispered sweet nothings in my ear….So looking at anyone in a bikini is a total fucking relief for me. It could be because I live in Canada and I don’t see nearly enough bikinis in a year and when I see anyone rockin’ one it gets me goin like a virgin with a high trafficked celebrity blog that posts High Res pics to share my amazing find with other fucking virgins…or it could be because this bitch I’ve never heard of before last week is rockin’ diamonds and being a poor person I dig diamonds…it means she’s living the dream even though no one knows who she is…it could be because she’s dressed like that at a charity and I like women who get naked for a cause but I prefer girls who get naked for no cause, because you don’t need a reason to show me your goods…trust me, I have no standards and don’t get offended by much, not even when this downs syndrome faced slut does it….

I am slow on my posts today because I had to be somewhere all morning. Sometimes you can’t control that shit. I am back now but it’s the end of the day – so I am not sure if I should bother to even post, but I will anyway.

2007

31

May

I am – Danielle Lloyd Bikini Pictures of the Day

2 Comments »

I know that I dropped a like to some of these pictures last night, but I figured I should do a post on them because that’s how obvious I am. I like to tip you fuckers off to posts I am going to do the following day just to keep everyone on the same page. Fuck surprises, I can’t compete with the speed of some of these virgin bloggers who have some keen ability to land all the fucking paparazzi pictures first. Sometimes I think they are out there taking the pictures themselves, but realize their acne, overbearing mother and social awkwardness prevents them from leaving the house too often. Either way, they make me look like a shitty blogger, because most of the celebrities I post about I’ve never heard of while these fuckers have their life stories, bra size and current relationship status branded on their brains.

Either way, here are the pictures of Danielle Lloyd, I am not sure who she is and I was going to go on and on about how bad I am at this blogging gayness but since I am up against a group of people you probably made fun of in high school, giving them a complex and leading them to this as a job, I’m pretty sure I’ll come out on top. I may not have been the virgin loser who chronically masturbated, was scared of girls and who everyone laughed at for dressing up like a Star Wars character for the high school dance because I was the slacker who no one really liked, who dropped out of school at 16 but still got pussy because I started drinking at a young age. No one wanted to be me, but no one picked on me and being too cool for school is way cooler than the school being too cool for you…

I should write an after-school special, I’ll cast Danielle Lloyd as the teacher who gets knocked up by a 15 year old gangster from her English class who sells weed. Seems like she’s into that whole Blacks on Blonds Business….or what I like to call BBB, at first I thought she was too skinny for that, then realized she’s planning for the future by the looks of her body, her budding cankles and double chin, I can tell you she’ll be a fat mess in a few years…that doesn’t mean stop eating girls….I like fat chicks, I married a fat chick, I was just making conversation. Cuddles.

Now With Some Shorts On….

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