I'll Make You Famous…

Archive for the Helena Chistensen Category




Helena Christensen Nude of the Day

Helena Christensen Nude

Helena Christensen still looks amazing…and she’s probably in her 70s…

She was one of the earlier Victoria’s Secret models…and is a nice reminder that Victoria’s Secret models never die, well I’m sure at least one has, maybe of anorexia or drugs…but I’m not talking about those ones….

Maybe she’s a robot created in a lab before they had the technology to make Josephine Skriver…

Maybe this is some WALL-E shit and she’ll be walking the fucking earth long after we kill it…

A forever reminder that earlier Victoria’s Secret was a better, simpler time, before Victoria’s Secret was played out, tacky, for basic ghetto bitches in every fucking mall. You know when the images weren’t the fucking same for 3 decades, but were exciting and celebrated, new and fresh, daring and edgy, controversial…and something men jerked off to in an era there was no porn, and to give wives a modern take on the Sears Catalog…

Smart marketing…it’s got old now that everyone is a nude model…but it’s still naked or half naked chicks and that is what it’s about.

Helena Christensen Nude


Posted in:Helena Chistensen|SFW




Helena Christensen Bikini is Scary of the Day

helena christensen bikini in nyc

Helena Christensen, the girl you jerked off to in the Chris Isaak’s video, I am pretty sure that was her…

Well, she’s old as fuck, almost 50, maybe 50, I don’t fucking know.

I just know she used to be a Victoria’s Secret model, she’s from Denmark, so she’s a Danish you KETO dieters on see all over social media can eat, I mean if you’re rich and famous….she apparently dated the INXS singer who auto-erotic asphyxiated himself like the people who killed Bourdain wanted you to think he did….when any seasoned Auto-Erotic asphyxiator would know to take a breath or release the tension on the belt before it was too late….she also has a kid with Norman Reedus…if that excites you….as it probably does cuz you’re a queer.

Well, she’s in a bathing suit, doing her old VS modeling tricks, because when that’s all you really know and are trained to do…you just keep doing it until you hit the old folks home…it’s pretty much the same logic I put into updating this site…what the fuck else am I gonna do with my time…something productive? That makes me rich? Fuck that.


Posted in:Helena Chistensen|SFW




Helena Christensen’s Topless Bikini of the Day

Comments Off on Helena Christensen’s Topless Bikini of the Day

Supermodel of the past, Helena Christensen is out in a bikini in Miami and she’s decided to let her tits out to tan like every good Euopean girl should. I guess it’s safe to say that she’s been keeping up her habits of not eating, snorting cocaine and whatever else she did when she was relelvant because here body is still tight, so tight that a gay dude from the band Interpol would get with her because he doesn’t want the bad press and because if he closes his eyes and visualizes, her pussy feels about as tight as a man’s asshole. At least that’s the story I heard.

Posted in:Bikini|Helena Chistensen|Topless|Uncategorized