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Archive for the Kelly Brook Category

2010

29

Jun

Kelly Brook is Still in Bikini of the Day

The people have new interest in Kelly Brook, even though she’s been getting half naked for a decade, because she’s been doing a major career push as she knows her natural tits aren’t quite as perky as they once were, and now’s the final stretch to make as much cash as possible so that she can finally retire, despite these pictures of her in her bikini relaxing cuz her life is so fucking stressful, screaming that she already lives like she’s retired….and who really cares what I have to say, just look at her tits.

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Posted in:Kelly Brook

2010

28

Jun

Kelly Brook Bikini Pictures of the Day

This Kelly Brook bitch is having a career revival on the internet. I’m not going to say I don’t understand why, because the internet is filled with horny dudes who like tits, and this bitch happens to have pretty amazing tits, but I don’t really get all the hype, since she’s been a lingerie model for the last 10 years, the same tits everyone is giving a ton of attention to lately. I am guessing she’s hired a new PR person and they’ve drawn up a new strategy to get people to actually care about the tits she’s always shown off and I really don’t give a fuck why this shit’s happening, I’m just good with the fact that it is happening. I also come from the school of thought that pussy from the UK is disgusting, so when a decent looking one comes out of the coal burning chimney she’s been sweepin’, shit should be celebrated…and I guess these bikini pictures are kinda doin’ that….


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Posted in:Kelly Brook

2010

01

Jun

Kelly Brook Ass in Some Sneaker Ad of the Day

I have a lazy pig of a wife who never really does anything that involves getting off the couch or eating prepared food. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her clean, do laundry, shower or cook…even though you’d think someone her size would love cooking and would have to clean both her clothes and herself because of the constant sweating….but laziness always overcomes…So I love seeing women in traditional gender roles, when bitches would spend the days at home cooking and cleaning and fucking the mailman out of boredom, while the husband was at the office making money while fucking the secretary, the cleaning staff, the neighbor’s wife…so this pictures of Kelly Brook get me and my needs and touch me on an emotional level, but unfortunatley are totally unbelievable, because I know any bitch that looks this good is married to a dude who has enough money to pay a staff and is just as lazy as my wife to do these menial everyday chores left for the common folk and migrant workers….it’s like this is the other end of the fucking spectrum of pig women, but at least she looks good when pretending…

Posted in:Ass|Kelly Brook

2009

14

Dec

Kelly Brook is a Desperate and Horny Whore of the Day

I can smell the dripping horny pussy from here…Kelly Brook must be at her sexual peak and her biological clock must be ticking…or maybe she’s just trying to put on a show for the small amount of the public who actually know and care about who she is…or maybe she’s just being possessive and overcompensating because her athlete boyfriend is probably dippin’ his gym shorts in a whole lot of other pussy cuz that’s what pro athletes do and I guess she’s just trying lay her stake for the world to see and I find the whole thing desperate and disgusting…rent a fucking room you whore…I hate horny girls because there’s nothing hot about a girl losing herself to her pussy’s itch…acting all swoony and pathetic…I prefer a girl who hates sex and is only letting me inside her because I’m either paying or raping.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Public Sex|Whore

2009

04

Nov

More Kelly Brook Stupid Cleavage of the Day

Kelly Brook’s rocking some corset lookin outfit like she’s a whore from the 1800s or some shit, you know like she was in Moulin Rouge or walking the streets of London before dying of Syphlis, all making me wish I was dressed like Jack the Ripper, you know the guy who would kidnap whores and bring them back home for play time, only instead of stabbing her violently and killing her, since that’s really not my thing, I’d definitely try to kill her with my dick….

I’m not sure what that means, but I think it means I like her or at least like her outfit….

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Tits

2009

04

Nov

Kelly Brook is TOpless for a Shitty Play of the Day

As a fat man, I have no choice but to appreciate these pictures of a bitch who combines some of my favorite things to make this highly erotic image, pastries and tits…Sure, I’m not as bad when it comes to food as my wife, she’s a serious pig and I’ve heard her cum eating a brownie and I don’t find food a sexual thing at all, it just fills some of my voids when I am not drunk….

I don’t remember who Kelly Brook is, but she’s topless on stage and it isn’t as fun as it was a few minutes ago, I think I’m hypoglycemic and getting cranky and need some sugar as a pick me up….now I’m starting to sound like my pig wife and for that I should go kill myself, or eat this cake my wife brought home last night….because really at this point…who really cares…I just don’t understand why the plays I was forced to go to never had naked pussy in it….I guess it is just further proof that I suck at life.

Pics via Bauer

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Theater|Topless

2009

28

Sep

Kelly Brook Slutting Out for Heels that Heal of the Day

I am a fan of charities that pressure women to get naked or half naked for the cause in efforts to generate buzz. The ones that real strike a chord with bitches and makes them think they are heartless cunts if they don’t get naked for the cause. At least that’s what the pervert who runs the shit tells them, when in reality he’s just some foot festishist who jerks off to the pictures too racy to make the campaign and pulls a huge salary off his “Not for Profit Organization” cuz everyone knows charities are a fucking money makin’ scam that works because veryone is too nice to question their intentions or target them as being con artists and the people behind charities are usually smart enough to keep the books clean as to not ruin a good thing they have running, like having the power to get celebrities in lingerie.

The highlight of this Kelly Brook campaign is that she brags about being a gold diggin’ whore who dates a rugby player who pays her for sex with expensive shoes, I mean besides the latex thigh highs…..

Posted in:Heels that Heal|Kelly Brook|Latex

2009

25

Sep

Kelly Brook Naked for Ralph Lauren of the Day

< Kelly Brook got some gig posing naked for Ralph Lauren, the downside is that she's covering her pussy with a bunch of flowers, which is a bit of a stretch because I hear her pussy hasn't got anything in common with flowers, despite what she wants people to believe, and more in common with rotting meat in the dumpster outside my butcher shop down the street. I don't know if thst's true, I just had nothing to really say about her since I know nothing about her or pictures of naked bitches with flowers, I just know that I once bought my wife roses and tried to convince her to let me fuck her with one back in the day, but only cuz I thought a "thorn in her pussy" would be a hell of a funnier expression that a "thorn in her side" and knew she needed to feel it first hand to really have conviction when dropping that line in public. Unfortunately, shit never came to fruition cuz she ruins all my fun. I have no idea what kind of drivel I am talkin' but I do know that Ralph Lauren photoshopped her pussy out, defeating the whole point in having her fucking naked to begin with, assholes.... .

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Ralph Lauren

2009

05

Aug

Kelly Brook in a Shitty Upskirt Picture of the Day

Kelly Brook stars in these latest horrible upskirt pictures. I don’t even know if I can make out ass, pussy or panties because of all the fuckin’ shadows and shitty photographic skills of the highschool drop out, immigrant, refugee the paparazzi gave a Digital SLR to to get pictures for them, but shit’s good enough to give you a good idea of the dimensions so that you can build your 3D model the area so that you can imagine where she hides her shit while you jerk off you fucking weirdo.

I wonder if I’ll ever get tired of calling you assholes virgins who can’t get laid….and after much thought and analysis it turns out that I doubt it…

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Upskirt

2009

01

Jun

Kelly Brook Hangs With Riley Steele of the Day

Pornstar Riley Steele is in some mainstream movie called Piranha 3-D with Kelly Brooke, which proves, yet again, that fucking on camera, is not a career killer, despite what every girl I try seducing into sending me sexy videos thinks.

Riley’s probably one of the better looking girls in porn and I heard somewhere that she was recruited into porn by Jesse Jane when in line at some in store signing Riley went to with a boyfriend.

Jesse Jane stole her away from her normal life and brought her into a life of porn, like anyone who is lookin’ out for your best interests would, leaving her homeboy in the fuckin’ dust, forcing him to jerk off to her on video but giving him the bragging rights that he once dated this cunt before she was getting paid to fuck, that lead to her getting paid to be in Mainstream, you know before she was rich and famous.

Here she is hanging with Kelly Brook….lookin like the cheesy porn chick that she is…

Posted in:Kelly Brook|Riley Steele