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Archive for the Lindsay Lohan Category

2017

09

Oct

Lindsay Lohan Hot Photoshoot of the Day

Lindsay Lohan Hot Photoshoot

Lindsay Lohan is an angel sent from heaven…the dream girl, the one I feel most connected to for no actual reason other than I like saying it…we’ve watched her grow up, we’ve seen her tits get bigger, and we’ve seen her near death, but then make what could have been a comeback but that is totally not a comeback at all…still crazy, still a mess, still a disaster, only now older, more haggard, jacked up with Plastic Surgery, and for years she had been keeping to herself, under the radar barely offensive in her self destruction, or what I guess we could call her coming of age, figuring herself and life out as the world was unfair to her by giving her so much then taking it away…and I guess now she’s back to crying for attention as women do…especially ones sold out as kids who don’t really get it…but know that people stop caring real fast…and they do it in slutty photoshoots like this…for fashion magazines like this..and the key to all of this is to remember one very important thing…she’s LOHAN…a god…to all..

She’s boxy, but busty, she’s weird and from afar she looks good…and that’s good…because she’s Lohan..our queen.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

22

May

Lindsay Lohan’s Weirdo Cooking Show of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is such a fucking weirdo…with brown looking teeth….and her raspy voice and doughy injected face….but I find her inspiring and you should too..

Because there’s nothing more erotic than a woman in the Kitchen, doing domesticated shit she probably never saw her own mother do, because they were Hollywood trash living the life of luxury early on in her life, and I guess cooking brings her peace and serenity and is therapeutic, not as much as all the medis she’s on…but therapeutic none the less..

She is the goddess Lindsay Lohan looking for nromalcy while being Lindsay Lohan…and for some reason I always like when a bitch cooks..I call it being a dude…with mommy issues…

She’s so hot, I like to start everyday with Lohan

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

17

May

Lindsay Lohan’s Armpit Titty of the Day

Lindsay Lohan is a magical creature sent from heaven, who must be an angel, not just because of how she makes me feel, but because she’s not dead, not because to live is to die…and dying is part of living…but LINDSAY LOHAN has been dying pretty hard since she was about 20 and is actually amazing that she’s still alive…so amazing that she has to be dead…

It would explain her career….it would explain her celebrity….it would explain why her parents don’t care about her, she was a commodity and she still is….out there navigating the world alone….showing off her ARMPIT titty…a place where TIT doesn’t need to be, but for armpit fetishists, is as wonderful as Lohan fake Titty once was – despite being her sex appeal’s pretty dead….she can still remain a fetish…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

24

Apr

Lindsay Lohan in Bathrooms with Friends of the Day

Lindsay Lohan in bathrooms with friends….and the only Lohan bathroom story I have is when I hung out with her – one time in my life – a while ago – around the start of her collapse – which was the single greatest day of my life – but probably not of her life as she knew the end was near…

Well, she locked herself in the bathroom with a friend I ended up sharing a cab home with, and came out an hour later…at around 4 in the morning…rockin’ out…girl was in Pajama pants singing and dancing and it was glorious because you see…she was in there doing her medicine and it really brought her to life…creepily but still iconic…so seeing her in the bathroom, with a snap filter instead of her botox face filter is nice…

But seeing her in this weirdo shoot…is better…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

07

Apr

Lindsay Lohan is Not in a Burkini of the Day

It’s my birthday – so why not celebrate rotting – like the corpses we all are…with LINDSAY LOHAN in a bikini..

To live is to die…and dying is part of living…and LINDSAY LOHAN has been dying pretty hard since she was about 20 and is actually amazing that she’s still alive… despite being her sex appeal’s pretty dead…in a bathing suit…and not YESTERDAY’s BURKINI…

She’s only 30, which is old, but not that old….but her body due to the years of abuse…looks bloated and broken and weird…a little fitness could do her some good…but instead she’s barrel bellied like a pug…the way I like my women….

Here she is…a gift to me…and a gift to all of you…

To See The Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

06

Apr

Lindsay Lohan Burkini Photoshoot of the Day

I figure if you’re a devout muslim, and your religion requires you to cover yourself up you shouldn’t be banned from the other joys of life, like playing around on the beaches of Thailand where little boys dress like girls and British men fuck them….it kind of takes the beautiful setting and landscape of Thailand…and taints it…..

So the Burkini makes sense to me, you know some fully clothed swimming….who the fuck cares if someone wears a fucking snowsuit to the beach…it doesn’t matter…

I figure if Lindsay Lohan is in a burkini doing a burkini shoot, she’s either helping out a friend, mocking the Arab Nation because she’s Lindsay Lohan, and everything about her is pretty much against all religion….but she is an actress and believes…

It’s just too bad that even in a burkini, while covered up, she looks like a bloated mom after the Christmas holidays in her sweat suit…not quite the bikini I want to see her Lohan implants in…

But the good news is she’s full of shit, this works for her for now, but soon enough she’ll be out in a regular bathing suit….like 5 minutes after this shoot….because that’s how ARAB she is….

I am not against any religion, but I don’t like all religion, Science debunked it and seeing these believers makes me think they are either lost souls, dumb, or full of shit….like Lohan in her Burkini…mocking for attention, a little PR hustle, while really believing in the 10,000 bucks the burkini company is probably paying her to be their spokesperson….

I guess what it comes down to is that this is the highlight of my day – and if everyone wore a burkini, maybe I’d be able to jerk off again…to normal things…like a woman’s ankle…or pussy definition in a bikini…or the lingerie catalog…and I won’t need spread asshole anymore or insertion and throat fucking anymore..I’ll be reset and back to normal..because all these girls naked all the time is desensitizing me.

To See The Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

24

Mar

Lindsay Lohan in a Bathing Suit Erotica of the DAy

Lindsay Lohan and her manager Scott – who looks like he’s a 13 year old frat boy rich kid who managed to sell Lohan on the dream…to boost his social media….because she’s a disaster and needs to be sold the dream that he can spin her life around….because Lohan is god….and there should be no reason they don’t spin her story and get her paid – besides the fact that she is a total fucking crazy person who self destructs…

They are in Thailand to take social media pics…..and/or lohan to rich people for sex. Big pimpin’…

What it comes down to is Lohan is perfect….

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

16

Feb

Lindsay Lohan Erotica Set to a Mother Teresa Quote – Weird – of the Day

Lindsay Lohan posted this picture of her tits…in lingerie set to a Mother Teresa Quote:

“If you judge people, you have no time to love them. Spread love everywhere you go. Let no one ever come to you without leaving happier. Be faithful in small things because it is in them that strength lies.” -Mother Teresa

I find that really fucking weird behavior, disturbing even…not because I am a religious man, not because I believe in Jesus, or even because I think that this picture is that bad, or non-catholic…but I wonder if Mother Teresa was thinking of Lindsay Lohan ever in her career as the Saint she became – saving dying children…which I guess Lohan can relate to thanks to no childhood, being exploited by her parents and the AIDS….but Lohan would make it about herself…to perpetuate some bullshit agenda…and she’s crazy so it makes sense…

What makes more sense is staring at her tits.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

15

Feb

Lindsay Lohan Leather Pants of the DAy

Some women, like Lohan, are rotting from the inside out – in terms of relevancy, spirit and genitals…so squeezing into unbreathable pants…is just crazy…but crazy is what she is…it is all she knows…it is all she’s ever known…so I guess it makes sense…it feels like home. It’s the only thing that’s real…it’s true to herself, it’s authentic in this world of everything being contrived, fake, strategic to get ahead bullshit…which based on her filled up face…and overall attitude towards real global issues…her crazy being real…is the only thing being real..the rest of her is just jacked the fuck up…but I’d still like to cum on it…just to see her trying to close her eyes – while her botox face muscles don’t let her….

I guess the point of this post is to say…I’d love to smell whatever those unbreathable pants baked for dinner…..while she was wearing them….

HOT TO ME…isn’t necessarily hot to anyone else in this terribly sad world…

TO SEE MORE – CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

16

Dec

Lindsay Lohan has a Manager of the DAy

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Lindsay Lohan recently posted her manager’s email.

I want everyone to email Lindsay Lohan’s manager who email she recently scott@scottcarlsen.com and ask him how much she costs for a cuddle session – no penetration – just a good wholesome cuddle…not that I am into cuddling – but figure once the cuddle is on…the anal is no too far away….especially when dealing with a crazy person…

It’s the Christmas season, little miracles happen people….That’s all I have to say about that…

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Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

01

Dec

Mangled Face Lohan is Accepting Aging Despite Her Mangled Face of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan has a mangled face. She’s jacked it up with drugs, bad living, self destruction and more importantly fillers and other plastic surgeries that left her looking more like a Kardashian over the last 5 years than a Lohan, and not the good Kardashian…but Bruce Kardashian…

But now she’s gone and accepted her life and her mangled face and the career she’s thrown away with bullshit, delusional statuses like:

It’s about that time to recognise gravity is taking over my upper half (or so to speak) #age #numbers #foreveryoung when you get home. Sit down. Analyse your future & see the wrinkles!

Because it’s good to be a rich spoiled brat…where everyone sucks up to you…so that your botox scars remind you of the aging process as you continue to fade into obscurity – with zero command over your audience that was pretty fucking into you for a long fucking time…convert that shit better you stupid fucking bratty crackhead…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

28

Nov

Lindsay Lohan Acting Weird in Bali of the Day

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I saw these weird pics of Lohan – because I pretend she’s my queen or goddess or ruler of the world – because she’s the only celebrity I’ve been in a hotel room with – while she cried and hugged me – before performing her music album with dances in her pajamas – because she’s fucking crazy….

But in reality I don’t actually give a fuck about her self involved nonsense, and if anything I just find her garbage – manipulator – who took opportunity and shat on it – because that’s what spoiled brats do – and her whole quest to find meaning is fucking lame…

But I did see these pics of her in a field at a villa on the ocean and thought – Sex Cult Crazy…because anyone who knows me – will know that I fucking love sex cults, and the dumb people who participate in them, and I’ve always wanted to start one – because they are that hilarious and amazing…

So I was like “Lohan’s in cult…broooooo”…it was exciting…but turns out that Lohan got one of her rich groupies to rent her a villa in Bali – so that she could write her book – her true story – from the eyes of a crazy fucking person – that is Lohan – a read that I’d actually love to read – but that I won’t bother reading – because I don’t find her that interesting – and don’t really care about what self involved – victim bullshit she puts out there – knowing that her true story is in fact a lie – and that her true story is actually really fucking boring – an entitled rich kid sold to the industry and tormented – like shut the fuck up – I prefer actual AIDS babies or people who do good – not some some drivel about “then I met Harvey Weinstein and he was a dick, so I railed `18 grams of coke and sucked a lot of dick”…fuck off Lohan..

Here’s one of her excerpts – LOLZ…pathetic…

Travelling sometimes leaves you speechless and in that silence, it leads you to greatness with a lot of stories to tell. – Lindsay Lohan (book coming soon)

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

24

Nov

A Thanksgiving Message from My Queen of the Day

I used to live with these weird, religious, uptight, british people and every Christmas they would make us watch the Queen’s speech as some family tradition, before eating breakfast…it was their really boring tradition….

Well, when I saw this video of a Lohan making some insane statement with a snapchat filter, wishing you all a Happy Thanksigiving in her accent while talking about how busy she is…it reminded me of those days, only far more regal, relevan, important, inspiring even….you know words to fucking live by and watching her is something I’d want to make an ongoing tradition of, ideally in my bed, everyday because Lohan is not just my Queen that I worship, but my God…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

02

Nov

Lindsay Lohan’s Accent is Amazing of the Day

This is so fucking good….

Lindsay Lohan has lost the command of the english language, because she’s an identity crisis, trying to be international….because she pretends that she speaks or understands Greek, Turkish, Italian and Arabic….and in that she has shape shifted her way into communicating like of of her accented friend…because they are the only people who really care about her or put up with her, it’s the Euro love for American pop culture, and she embodies it and fills their rich person life up with great joy….but anyone who knows anything about linguistics knows that after the age of 7, it’s pretty hard to break down any accent you have, you have to really work at it. I went to school with a British kid and an Australian kid and they had those accents until they were in their 20s…and to lose an accent involves serious work…but in this case…it’s not losing her american accent, it’s picking up some weird ethnic broken english, like she didn’t speak english her entire life…

This reminds me of when my Jewish neighbor orders chinese food, or talks to Haitians on the bus, he always rudely speaks to them in broken english as if he’s mocking her…it’s just nonsense…it’s not his real accent, he just thinks they understand him better when he speaks like they speak…even if it’s condescending, borderline racist…and hilarious….

It also reminds me of the Italian immigrants in Montreal, where I live…because they are raised to speak broken Italian at home, broken english at home and broken french at school..making a spot on Lohan sounding accent, only that’s how they speak…that’s not them being a broken down actress…acting…

I think the real highlight of all this is Long Island born, Disney Raised, broken down starlet considers herself “Italian” and “Irish” more than American…despite her parents being the embodiment of American trainwreck…

If anything this is just representative of how fucking lost this soul is…now…show us more tits.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2016

01

Nov

Lindsay Lohan in her Underwear Because She’s Crazy of the Day

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Lindsay Lohan posted a picture in underwear..and now I am re-posting the picture for halloween because she’s a zombie…it’s not her fault it’s all the medication and crazy..and no one cares about her looking hot and half naked but me….because I am a very basic lazy person, who is old as fuck and stuck in the past and willing to continue to jerk off to old news, it’s easier, it’s there, it’s familiar, it’s not so magical, but it looks pretty fit, or maybe half dead but magical enough to me…mainly because it has survived this long….and weird enough…this is the highlight of my dad…because Lohan is my spirit animal…and I feel connected at the soul…

Now…Here’s a creepy video of her…

Here she is as Harley Quinn because she’s basic…and has had sex with Joker Face…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW