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Archive for the Lindsay Lohan Category

2007

02

Mar

I am – Lohan’s Nipples of the Day

3 Comments »

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I love when I am the first on shit like this because no one ever links me or cares. All the other shitty blogs will bring the traffic home, but in the words of Randy Jackson on American Idol, I will keep on truckin dog. I am pretty excited Kelly Pickler is going to be singing after the break and that gives my life purpose. Southern trash destined to be a stripper who broke the stereotype are someone you need to learn from, even though she is dumber than the pile of dog shit on the back porch of her shanty.

Rumor has it the new server is kickin’ in in an hour. So stay tuned for that. Knowing the disaster of my life it’s not going to work at all….

Speaking of not working, here are some pics of Lohan that I didn’t take and don’t have the rights to post, showing off her nipples. She’s got pretty solid tits, I appreciate the weight gain, cuz fat chicks is what I do and that’s all I have to say about that….

I got 2 fan emails today – I really am going to the top, aren’t you happy you’re part of something this big in a time of crisis. I know I am…and I guess that’s all that matters…

Hey,

Nothing witty or funny to say or share but keep up the good work with your site.

Very rarely do i come across a site that i visit on a regular basis and your little corner of the net is a daily stop for me and always provides a good laugh, great wit really does go appreciated.

Long may it continue

and

Dear Mr. Stepfather,

I love your blog, I don’t know quite about how I came upon it, but I visit it as many times per day as I can. I also tell all my friends about it but seeing as how I have only 2 friends it does not help your traffic issues all that much. In conclusion, it is an honor to be molested by you and you are better than dlisted, wwtdd, and idlyitw. Okay thanks nice talking to you.

Love, John

There is nothing much better than some positive reinforcement. I feel like the dyslexic kid who got a gold star on his spelling test.

On an American Idol Live Blog Note…Antonella Barba wasn’t voted of idol. Being a slut pays. I like how she is crying for the bitch who got kicked off, and I was wrong about the Kelly Pickler shit, she didn’t perform….Now back to Lohan’s nipples…

My pictures and emails aren’t working – but I still figured out how to bring you the goods

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

02

Mar

I am – Lohan's Nipples of the Day

No Comments »

lohan_nipple_top.jpg

I love when I am the first on shit like this because no one ever links me or cares. All the other shitty blogs will bring the traffic home, but in the words of Randy Jackson on American Idol, I will keep on truckin dog. I am pretty excited Kelly Pickler is going to be singing after the break and that gives my life purpose. Southern trash destined to be a stripper who broke the stereotype are someone you need to learn from, even though she is dumber than the pile of dog shit on the back porch of her shanty.

Rumor has it the new server is kickin’ in in an hour. So stay tuned for that. Knowing the disaster of my life it’s not going to work at all….

Speaking of not working, here are some pics of Lohan that I didn’t take and don’t have the rights to post, showing off her nipples. She’s got pretty solid tits, I appreciate the weight gain, cuz fat chicks is what I do and that’s all I have to say about that….

I got 2 fan emails today – I really am going to the top, aren’t you happy you’re part of something this big in a time of crisis. I know I am…and I guess that’s all that matters…

Hey,

Nothing witty or funny to say or share but keep up the good work with your site.

Very rarely do i come across a site that i visit on a regular basis and your little corner of the net is a daily stop for me and always provides a good laugh, great wit really does go appreciated.

Long may it continue

and

Dear Mr. Stepfather,

I love your blog, I don’t know quite about how I came upon it, but I visit it as many times per day as I can. I also tell all my friends about it but seeing as how I have only 2 friends it does not help your traffic issues all that much. In conclusion, it is an honor to be molested by you and you are better than dlisted, wwtdd, and idlyitw. Okay thanks nice talking to you.

Love, John

There is nothing much better than some positive reinforcement. I feel like the dyslexic kid who got a gold star on his spelling test.

On an American Idol Live Blog Note…Antonella Barba wasn’t voted of idol. Being a slut pays. I like how she is crying for the bitch who got kicked off, and I was wrong about the Kelly Pickler shit, she didn’t perform….Now back to Lohan’s nipples…

My pictures and emails aren’t working – but I still figured out how to bring you the goods

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

01

Mar

I am – Lohan’s Dumpy Ass Goes to Stripping Class of the Day

44 Comments »

lohan_stripping_classtop.jpg

Here are some pics of Lohan on her way to stripper class wearing the dumpiest pair of jeans I have ever seen on a woman. She reminds me of the Walmart clerk who was giving me the sex eyes when I was buying a box of condoms, a roll of duct tape, some rope, a Kenny G CD, an electric drill and 14 pairs of women’s panties of varying sizes a few years ago. I was only doing it as a joke because I was convinced someone would call the cops, but they didn’t….it was before I found the internet and fucking with people was so much more labor intensive….

Either way, Lohan’s jeans may have cost her more than my apartment costs in rent for 6 months, but if I ever got to a strip club and a bitch wearing that elemantary school teacher with 8 kids at home look, I’d totally take her for a lap dance, because I take what I can get, even when it comes to strippers. I think I may be the only person who has been turned down for strippers even after waving crumpled up, shit stained 5 dollar bills in front of their faces…

I can’t help but tell myself that this slut is wearing some sexy lingerie under these pant, but I realize that’s just fantasy talking. It happens sometimes…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2007

01

Mar

I am – Lohan's Dumpy Ass Goes to Stripping Class of the Day

No Comments »

lohan_stripping_classtop.jpg

Here are some pics of Lohan on her way to stripper class wearing the dumpiest pair of jeans I have ever seen on a woman. She reminds me of the Walmart clerk who was giving me the sex eyes when I was buying a box of condoms, a roll of duct tape, some rope, a Kenny G CD, an electric drill and 14 pairs of women’s panties of varying sizes a few years ago. I was only doing it as a joke because I was convinced someone would call the cops, but they didn’t….it was before I found the internet and fucking with people was so much more labor intensive….

Either way, Lohan’s jeans may have cost her more than my apartment costs in rent for 6 months, but if I ever got to a strip club and a bitch wearing that elemantary school teacher with 8 kids at home look, I’d totally take her for a lap dance, because I take what I can get, even when it comes to strippers. I think I may be the only person who has been turned down for strippers even after waving crumpled up, shit stained 5 dollar bills in front of their faces…

I can’t help but tell myself that this slut is wearing some sexy lingerie under these pant, but I realize that’s just fantasy talking. It happens sometimes…

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2006

01

Dec

I am – Lindsay Lohan Parties at LAX of the Day

1 Comment »

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Here are some pics of Lindsay Lohan partying at LAX a few days ago because she’s an alcoholic and a whore. She’s also last week’s kitchen garbage but that’s not the point, the point is that she’s the fucking star of the show, and by show I mean this website proven by Lohan Stalker Posts. She may not be that hot or interesting especially in these pics but as the star she deserves love in good times and bad…

Speaking of stars, the star of homeless man dance just started talking to me, because some 85 year old Jesus (the real jesus) lover started telling him that the lord is with him…after the 85 year old left, Homeless Man Dance, started chatting me up like I was someone he knew. He made no fucking sense, he said his IQ is 290 and after I decided to escape he said “peace to me”. While he was talking to me, I tried writing the insanity he said down, this is pretty much verbatim. So here it is…

I became a greaser, I know you’re a greaser because you like a red hubcap… I changed it to a greaser after a guy in the school yard….I am more of a custard guy, not a pudding guy.

I go to what it was, so what would it be, I got my violin, I got to when you were young looking…. i go that’s what happens…I stall, I go to unwind. I pass by, I go to the washroom, I go to Danny, I go to Gloria and Carol, and make sure they don’t move towards me….. I got to the thing that is telling me what it is. I go to karma, my arms are raised. I go to, it doesn’t feel like you’re acting when it came to me. I go to the two of them took me off them, I go to something of you and something of me, i go to my father. I go to the bookstore, I am a gunsmith and you’re an engraver. There’s nothing there, it’s me.

I go to the day I became a greaser, I go to Linda, I am thinking of my father and you phoned him and you could only see me….Then we go to what I did with deep sea fishing. I ensure there is something about us. Then I go to her….I changed it to a pink one. I go over to the superman thing, I go to whether I actually saw a steel ball.

Britney Spears is my girlfriend, and Gwen Stefani is your girlfriend. There I am going to say it for the first time Brook’s lost control. I am going to say it, Britney Spears is my girlfriend.

I am going to say it is my 38th year on the street and 58th year of life. They were all murdered from me. I’ll throw the trouble with money….

It’s a cowboy song, the indian song is better. It falls out his hand, he’s nervous…Here’s the speed story….something about the fishnet stockings….

The Bugs Crawled in the Bugs Crawled Out….All over his greasy snout.

This may not come across as funny as it was but at least it can act as a reminder of how lame DJ AM is even though he’s banging celebs and you aren’t….

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Parties|Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

12

Sep

I am – Lohan Upskirt Flashing Her Vagina of the Day

3 Comments »

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I started smoking cheap cigars, because cheap is what I do and I was tired of craving cigarettes. I haven’t smoked in 10 months and think about it at least 5 times a day, every day. I don’t inhale these things, but the act of smoking relaxes me. That doesn’t mean I like sucking cock. I also drank a bottle of wine tonight because I like to pretend I am living large. After a sobering walk I came home and told one of my stepdaughters about my sex life before her fat mother destroyed my sex drive with her cellulite-ridden ass. I don’t think she appreciated the story of the 19 year old who I drank a 40 oz bottle of rum with and the proceeded to teach how to strip to her mix DJ tape. This was about 10 years ago. After an hour of her running around my house with her panties off and the last of the rum was consumed, I told her it was lap dance time. When she started grinding me and shovin’ her ass in my face, I couldn’t resist diving in mouth first. So the lesson of the day is that honesty is more effective with a little discretion….especially when talking to your stepdaughter about getting underage girls (in the USA) drunk and teaching them how to be strippers. Speaking of 19 year old drunken stripping whores, here are some pictures of Lohan showing a tight-upskirt in the UK where she leaves a restaurant called Cipriani to go to a club called Kabaret, where she proceeded to get drunk, high and pregnant with an AIDS baby that she’s going to give to Angelina Jolie, because Angelina likes Aids babies and Lohan has Aids, at least that’s the story I heard.

Yes – She’s wearing Panties this time.

BONUS – NEW BOX SHOT

Posted in:flash|Lindsay Lohan|Uncategorized|Unsorted|Upskirt|Vagina

2006

06

Sep

Lindsay Lohan is Flashin' Her Dirty Box of the Day

1 Comment »

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I am officially an idiot, I was saw these pictures yesterday and I was debating whether I should post them or not because they looked like they were fake. I wake up this morning and they are all over the motherfucking place and here I am sitting on the golden Lohan pussy shot that would have made me rich. If any fucking site should be posting this shit it should have been me because I am the Lohan stalker and because I sleep in, and the fact that I sleep on pictures that look fake. These are probably reasons why I am not successful.

That said. I should learn to trust my instincts. Like the time I was getting down with this slutty girl and she insisted we use a condom and I was all like – Fuck that shit, I don’t roll like that, 4-6 weeks later I was pissing fire. Speaking of Fire, here are the Lohan pics, which unfortunately don’t have any orange pubic hair because bitch waxes. She obviously doesn’t know that redheads aren’t supposed to go bald and that they have to embrace their orange pubes because that is the main reason a motherfucker’s slamming them. We’ve all heard that orange pussy exists we just want to see what an orange pussy looks like. I guess another reason someone would slam a redhead could be because dude’s drunk at the bar and she’s the last one standing because redheads are like super heros and are always the last to fall. I have a whole theory that involves them being thought of as devils when they were born in the middle ages and how their parents would throw them in the woods to survive making the redheaded gene a strong one. But that’s no the point, the point is Lohan’s box is not as mangled as I thought.

Posted in:flash|Lindsay Lohan|Pussy|Unsorted|Vagina

2006

06

Sep

Lindsay Lohan is Flashin’ Her Dirty Box of the Day

1 Comment »

lindsaybox03.jpg

I am officially an idiot, I was saw these pictures yesterday and I was debating whether I should post them or not because they looked like they were fake. I wake up this morning and they are all over the motherfucking place and here I am sitting on the golden Lohan pussy shot that would have made me rich. If any fucking site should be posting this shit it should have been me because I am the Lohan stalker and because I sleep in, and the fact that I sleep on pictures that look fake. These are probably reasons why I am not successful.

That said. I should learn to trust my instincts. Like the time I was getting down with this slutty girl and she insisted we use a condom and I was all like – Fuck that shit, I don’t roll like that, 4-6 weeks later I was pissing fire. Speaking of Fire, here are the Lohan pics, which unfortunately don’t have any orange pubic hair because bitch waxes. She obviously doesn’t know that redheads aren’t supposed to go bald and that they have to embrace their orange pubes because that is the main reason a motherfucker’s slamming them. We’ve all heard that orange pussy exists we just want to see what an orange pussy looks like. I guess another reason someone would slam a redhead could be because dude’s drunk at the bar and she’s the last one standing because redheads are like super heros and are always the last to fall. I have a whole theory that involves them being thought of as devils when they were born in the middle ages and how their parents would throw them in the woods to survive making the redheaded gene a strong one. But that’s no the point, the point is Lohan’s box is not as mangled as I thought.

Posted in:flash|Lindsay Lohan|Pussy|Unsorted|Vagina

2006

23

Aug

I am – Lohan and her Retarded and Rich Boyfriend of the Day

9 Comments »

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There was a time in my life where I used to stalk Lindsay Lohan. I would have my jewish neighbor call her up and read a message I wrote to her. He would edit them to music and a picture slideshow of the cunt in action. One of them was seen by 100,000 people. Then I realized that it was a waste of time to stalk this cunt because she never returned my motherfuckin calls, and because no one found it funny but me. The original reason I started the stalking shit was because I thought it would be a good marketing strategy. I figured that enough ppl would take it seriously and send me a restraining order, getting my site on every major News and Entertainment show. Then bitch goes out and gets herself a real stalker and he takes away all my fucking glory. This is a Jon Benet Ramsey Tranny Killer of the day situation. He’s getting coverage coming out of his ass, first class plane tickets from Thailand, I was even watching Access Hollywood the other day and they’re interviewing the cast of CSI or Criminal Minds or some shit for their expert opinion. That’s like if the same Jon Benet Ramsey Killer got his sex change done by the cast of Grey’s Anatomy. I just turned on the TV, hoping to watch The View, to see Rosy O’Donnel back in the Lime-Light, because she’s not as lady like as Jon Benet’s killer and Grey’s Anatomy is on instead. That’s pretty much the reason this post took the turn that it did. I know it’s a lot of garbage to read, but I cropped the retard header pic and I find it pretty funny. So laugh at that and ignore my writing. It wouldn’t be a first. Asshole.

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|Unsorted

2006

21

Feb

Lohan Fan Pic of the Day

8 Comments »

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I don’t know where I came across this. It was probably a photobucket search for Lohan or someshit. I guess the story behind this is some make a wish foundation bullshit, where one of these bitche’s is dying of something terminal, let’s say AIDS, but it could be cancer, and they win a shopping spree with their favorite teen dream Lohan. This pic looks a good year or two old, so it probably happened when Lohan still cared about the kids. Lately, all that’s on her mind is cocaine….I know this because I have a connection to Lohan. Just not the kind I want (dick in ass, raw dog, if you know what I mean)….. I am drinking as I write this. I bet there’s at least one typo. Go fuck yourself.

Posted in:fan|Lindsay Lohan|Uncategorized|Unsorted