I don’t remember the last time I was hungover, cuz I always feel this way. I don’t remember the last time I took a shit because I don’t keep track of those things, but the good news is, unlike Farrah Fawcett before she died, I still have my anus. But my shirt was covered in a brown smelling shit like substance…

I was drunk all day, all night, I hate talking about the shit, I’m not proud of it, it is just what I do and here is a less offensive smelling hangover dump.

Posted in:MHD

I got drunk, went to the casino, watched my friend win 100 dollars, then followed him to some ghetto brothel, where I watched him fuck some street looking whore, it smelled like shit and was all it expected to be. I’m not hungover, just confused as to why there’s blood on my hand….I should probably figure it out…but instead I’m posting my Morning Dump…

Posted in:MHD

I spent the night coming to terms with reality…You know that this site is an irrlevant piece of shit….that it was once a big deal, but never than big of a deal, but a big enough deal for magazines to interview me and shit, back when other sites didn’t post the exact same shit as me, faster and better than me….I’ve lost at my own game….

It’s like I just realized that people outgrow their drunkenstepfathers who go from getting drunk and molesting to hating them… you know from “I promise I won’t tell mommy” to “you did bad things to me-i’m going to the police and a therapist for life”…

It’s a sad truth, but at least I got Whiskey….

Here’s some morning links…

Posted in:MHD

My morning hangover dump took place an McDonalds where I was forced to watch CNN with a bunch of Retirees and homeless people. Together we ate like old family friends and I learned that Arnold Schwartznegger fucks the help and knocks them up, I learned that French President in Training, Rape the Help, and I learned that Basketball coaches are fags.

Oh what a glorious morning….I still think Ginger Spice ass flashing is the high point of this day in history.

Posted in:MHD

As much as I hate TV, I made a night of getting drunk and watching TV with my sketchy neighbor, who for some reason always smells like a sewage pipe, and who is either high on speed, or just very energetic and needs a lot of bathroom breaks, it was a big night, I mean Survivor Finale, it’s the shit that makes coversations Monday morning’s at the office, cuz I worked at an office and I know how you idiots relate to each other based on TV, and maybe that’s what made me hate the shit and take 8 years to come back to the shit, but last night, 8 drinks in, it was ok, until this sewage tweaked out bitch tried to make me eat her out by shoving her crusty cunt in her face while I was at Tribal Council, I never smelled a smell like that, and trust me, I pretty much sleep with anything that doesn’t make me gag, so I had to escape…so unfortunately, no hangover, but I do have hangover dump and my lip is tingling, I’m convinced it’s a cold sore…that’s neighbors….

Posted in:MHD

I am actually hungover….sketching out…drank at my creepy neighbor’s house watching some movie about dance…the things I will do for free alcohol at 2 am is almost insane….luckily….I didn’t meet the homeless obese girl who looked dehydrated and weak despite being obese until this morning…cuz I probably would have tried to have my way with her…you know sniffin her unshowered soot covered bacterial infection cooch thanks to bad hygiene and bad choices….

Posted in:MHD

I tried getting drunk in a bar last night. I’ve been limiting bar visits cuz bars are depressing and a waste of money. I’d get drunk at home where the only idiot I have to listen to is myself… Not being forced to interract with idiots. But I went against my way, ended up in hell, had to watch desperate to get married 35 year old women talk about their boyfriend troubles, dudes talk about picking up those random girls, and there were a few awkward 35 year old couples you know were only there on an internet date to fuck, but they were trying to make it more legitimate so the bitch didn’t feel like a whore when she took his load on her face, so the bitch could go to her friends and say “He took me on a date, we had great chemistry”. It has a better ring to it than “I needed to get fucked like a useless whore I feel like I am on the inside”.

Good times!

Posted in:MHD

Today’s Morning Hangover Dump smells like Jack and cheese.

I hate talking about shit, but it’s better than talking about how uneventful a drunk I was last night…See there’s something boring as fuck about drinking yourself stupid alone late night and that something boring is the lack of hot tits to gawk, but I did have a pleasant conversation with a guy in the UK who wants to fuck his teenage stepdaughter, that was alright, you know cuz it reminded me I attract the upper crust of society with this site….you know the real cool crowd….

Here are some morning links:

Posted in:MHD

Bad Late Night Chinese Food borrowed from some homeless dude, in what may have been a horrible late night drunk decision, makes for a very bad hangover dump…..Let’s do it again sometime.

Posted in:MHD

The morning hangover dump loses appeal when it is mid afternoon. I’m a slacker. Deal with it…

Here are the links

Posted in:MHD