I am really into Miley Cyrus right now…and I have no idea why….maybe it is the fact that she’s skinny and dresses pretty hot…or maybe I just like broken child stars who have too much money to know what to do with and who live in some fantasy land that isn’t really anyone’s reality…but that they get to rule as if it is their own personal fucking kingdom…cuz that’s how spoiled brats from trashy backgrounds do it…but I think it has more to do with the fact that she’s skinny and dresses pretty hot….because looking at pics of her allows me to ignore all that is flawed in her personality….

Here is her costume…all animal print and exotic….something Miley definitely isn’t…but we can pretend she is….because this is the internet and anything goes….

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If I could learn one lesson from my travels through Miami International airport in recent hours, it is that weddings…or the people who have destination weddings, are the worst kind of white trash around….I am talking under 25 year old fat girls drinking cocktails and eating deep friend appetizers in a TGI Fridays as their neck fat jiggles and they brag about how hard they are gonna fuck in efforts to get knocked up on this magical adventure in paradise…or whatever the fuck I just witnessed….

Marriage is for idiots. It is for trash. It is for 9-5 workings, suburban dwelling trash who want to pump out kids and live the miserable life their mothers and fathers had….because they just don’t have other options in their town of 5000 people….

Marriage, when it comes to Miley…is a joke…like it is whenever a 20 year old says she’s engaged…it is part of a master marketing plan that she may actually believe she’s engaged in….cuz this robot…is such a fucking robot…she doesn’t know what is real….but I know one thing that is real…and that is how bad I want to have zoo-like sex with her while looking at her leg peak through her wild and crazy animal print dress…even when it comes with product placement you know this robot is being paid to wear….

There’s just something about Miley that makes me want to cum in her as much as I want to punch her in the face…not that I’d ever hit a woman…it was figurative not literal people….I would only hit Miley if I was drunk and confused this dyke haircut for some genderless hipster staging a home invasion…and I had to fight for survival….not that that would ever happen…Miley doesn’t know what Canada is. She’s educated like that.

I can’t believe I just wrote a fucking novel set to pics of Miley taking a walk. There is something wrong with me.

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Miley Cyrus is still kinda exciting…in what is probably the least exciting possible way…you know she puts up pics of her pantsless…rockin’ her lesbian haircut with her friend who looks 11…pulling some hipter teen girl in her vintage clothes just wasting time…when really she should be pantsless in bootleg porn videos after burning through all her child star money like a real child star….but I take what I can get.

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I woke up to a text from a lovely, fit, young lady I want to do very very naughty things to…you know things I can only do with her vagina and my mouth and my penis….saying that Miley Cyrus had a sex tape drop….and I actually took the time to google the shit…before realizing it was a hoax…Miley doesn’t need sex tapes yet…she’s got all the fame and fortune she needs and the sex tape will only come in a decade when she’s officially fallen off and a mess…after bad investments, drugs and the after shock of no one giving a fuck about her…but for now….muppet head and lesbian hair and all…I am into this bitch…and I don’t know why…but assume it has to do with her skinny fit body…and round lovely tits.

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Miley Cyrus may not be the future…her time may be done…her lesbian haircut may be a little too 15 year old girl at the mall trying to be hard and full of angst….all bi sexual hipster gone mainstream shit….but I’d sure be into K-Feding her and her muppet face…it’d be a life I’d be willing to live…spending her Disney Money like I was her parents….but it’ll never happen so I’ll just stare at pics of her doing menial errands…cuz that shit is porn to me…it’s the basis of all my public masturbation…

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So….some screenshots of Miley on Two and a Half Men….even though I find it hard to believe Ashton Kutcher counts as a man….seeing that he’s a little bitch….dropped….because I guess Two and a Half Men fucking sucks and is starving for any attention it can get.. cuz the best thing that ever happened to them was the Charlie Sheen breakdown….or really just Charlie Sheen being Charlie Sheen in general…and they must be struggling since this pansy fucker took his spot….but I wouldn’t know cuz I don’t watch this shit….but I do know Miley looks pretty hot in it…all push up bra wearing and cleavage enhanced with her lesbian puck rock hipster hair…it’s a bit of a fucking turn on…and I guess that’s the show’s producer’s hope…cuz they’ll take anything they can fucking get for people to remember they exist…

The show airs October 18….if you care….

Here are those promo pics they leaked so people like me do posts like this.

I’m onto your tricks Mr. Tv Exec.

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Miley Cyrus is awesome….she is a fashion icon and not just to robot lesbians who admire her dyke hair…but to tweens everywhere who are now going bra-less and spandex shorts everywhere they go….making me happy to not be a school teacher as with the early onslaught of puberty, coupled with parents who don’t seem to mind that their daughter are dressed like 80s hookers, not having sex or wanting sex with them is probably challenging no matter how morally grounded you are.

You see just the other day I was in line for a coffee behind a grandfather and his 15 year old grand daughter who had legs for days and a booty that wouldn’t quit but that could hang out of her shorts… with C cup tits and a toned stomach busting out of a tank top….in what made me feel really creepy staring….but that I couldnt’ stop staring at…because as much as I don’t want to sex a tween….I had to take in the pretty serious sceince experiment/miracles that Genetically Modified foods are making in our own backyards and school yards…

The shit is pretty fucking real….and here’s Miley Braless and lovely…

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Miley Cyrus released some new pics on her website…with her new hair…and some were semi-slutty…but not slutty enough for my liking…since there was no labia being spread….or objects being inserted…even though pics of Miley alone give me boners…because she’s at her fucking hottest…she’s built to last…good country structure that isn’t country at all but that is fucking skinny…in ways I want to explore with my tongue….I mean as long as she remains in pictures…because you know that as soon as you’re in a room with her…she’s loud and attention seeking…not damaged enough to realize that she’s not as important as she thinks she is….only surrounded by friends who use her..suck up to her and help inflate her brat bubble that I’d like to fill up with me semen.

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Miley Cyrus is amazing…everyone is shitting on each other’s face about her hair, but who the fuck cares about whether she’s got a shaved head or not…some of the best blowjobs I have had have been from bitches going through cancer treatment….but that was only because I worked at a cancer ward of a hospital for a minute and I’m good a seducing….and this shit isn’t even bald, it’s on some hipster ghetto girl kick, the Hollywood, privileged girl who is out to get some attention because that’s what pays her fucking bills, and now she is on some Rock the Vote campaign, because I guess she believes in our democratic right in our capitalist society, or maybe, just maybe, she’s getting paid….

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I saw my first incest porn when I was 15 and I have loved the idea of incest ever since…If I was a psychiatrist I would say it probably has got to do with the fact that the only family I knew my mother was a whore and I used to see her fuck before being taken away by some orphanage…bouncing around from family to family…but this isn’t a therapy session….this is supposed to be me giving Miley the thumbs up for posting this pic with her slutty mom who you know was some stripper or Gogo Line Dancer groupie motherfucker on Billy Ray…and that alone makes her the kind of girl who would have fucked her daughter on camera for money and male attention had she not won the Achey Breaky lottery….and there’s something highly sexy about that level of class….

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