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Archive for the Skirt Category

2010

02

Mar

Eva Longoria is Bent Over in a Little Skirt of the Day

I don’t know how long this Desperate Housewives shit is going to go on for, but I do know that the ladies are starting to age in a pretty major way and that they should consider changing the name to Desperate Retirees.

Lookin at these pictures of Eva Longoria, I can tell they had to strap this Mexican trying so hard to be white ditch pig up so tight that her ravaged married and sloppy ass still had the youthful perk. I’m talking the industrial sized SPANX to shape her in a way that wouldn’t make the average man forced to watch this shit because he is poor and only has one TV or is totally fucking owned by his wife and who does what she tells him because he traded in his balls for the married life years earlier, think to himself “she she really is a desperate housewife and now the one thing that was decent about this show and that allowed me to put up with watching the show has turned to shit like their tired fucking storyline”….. and here are the pics.

Pics via Fame
Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Eva Longoria|Skirt

2010

02

Feb

Trying To Look up Elle Macpherson’s Skirt of the Day

I don’t know why Elle Macpherson is on a bed posing with bras but I am not as excited about it as I was in 1988 when she was showing off her nipples in the SI Swimsuit video back in a time when she was way more eager to get noticed, now bitch is all jacked up with support pantyhose and spanx and whatever else is containing her mom pussy to make sure it doesn’t sneak ot of her skirt as mom pussies tend to do when they are let out to play…but at least she gave us a glimpse of what could have been or maybe of what once was….and I’ve spent the last 10 mintues lookin’ at these pictures trying to see up her skirt but it’s been a serious waste of time….but I figured you’re just a bored as I am so I’m giving you something to do with your useless self. Giving you purpose. you’re welcome…

Pics via PacificCoastNews
Pics via LFI

Posted in:Elle Macpherson|Skirt

2009

16

Dec

Courtney Cox Comparin’ Dicks of the Day

Here are some pictures of Courtny Cox comparing David Arquette’s little dick to his tranny brother’s huge dick once the pantyhose and duct tape come off, cuz we all know she’s had both, those Arquettes are fuckin’ weird and shes’d doing it all while wearing a little skirt that is really not exciting to me. Mainly because she’s always looked like a fuckin’ skeleton to me and watching her play tennis is not like watching Kournikova or Sharapova yelping and moaning flashing ass, and is more on the level of erotic as that big Williams sister….and I don’t have any idea why I’m bothering writing about this bitch, it just kinda happened and I’d apologize for this if I really cared about what you had to say….but I don’t because I already hate myself and nothing you could say will bring me any lower *tear* or maybe it’s because you’re not one to take seriously…either way, here’s Courtney Cox and a post littered with really weak fucking jokes….it happens…

Pics via PacificCoastNews

Posted in:Courtney Cox|Skirt

2009

04

Dec

Heidi Klum’s Mom Ass in a Skirt Modeling of the Day

This is the booty the Seal fucks the shit out of before not pulling the fuck out and knocking her the fuck up for the 10th fucking time all bounced back into shape after giving birth to their latest mixed-race creature. She is already getting world modeling for some German bullshit and she remains a good freak of nature because even teenage girls with eatin disorders don’t bounce back from their baby-weight this fat….another thing in her life that is a freak of nature….Seal’s face…but that doesn’t really matter, what does matter is when are they going to release a sex tape…because I can only assume as a German woman and a very large black man with a mangled face….the shit is fucking demonic to watch…I’m talking scat, bondage, latex and piss…possible inclusion of midgets and barn animals…I don’t fucking know…I just know it’ll be good and not even because of how hot this bitch is, just because I know there is a reason for all their breeding and I want a glimpse into it….

Either way, Heidi Klum has a substantially better body than every single mother I have met over the last few decades and that’s all I have to saw about that…

Pics via Fame

Posted in:Heidi Klum|Mom Ass|Skirt

2009

08

Jul

Megan Fox and Her Ass in a Skirt of the Day

I remember meeting a pornstar named Sasha Grey and she was dressed like a school teacher. I thought the irony was hot, not that I know what irony is, but every other pornstar, who was far less dirty than Sasha Grey was dressed in cheap sex store outfits, and despite hating her porn because it’s too dirty for me, and I prefer my whores to be everyday girls gone bad, and not weird goth girls who do what they do because they pretend its some artistic venture when in reality they just want attention and were molested by their dad’s or some shit, I thought it was interesting.

Seeing Megan Fox in a similar outfit is far less interesting because I know that behind this pencil skirt you’d want to see on a librarian who lets her hair down, you know she’s goin home to fuck David from 90210, because Megan Fox is sex on the surface, it’s all an act and attempt to be a sex icon, when in reality I can tell she doesn’t gag on cock or take it up the ass and I for one, am tired of the lies.

Posted in:Ass|Megan Fox|Skirt

2009

23

Jun

Lookin Up Jennifer Aniston’s Skirt of the Day

I just spend 5 minutes zooming in and out of this Jennifer Aniston upskirt pictures like some kind of virgin, not because I am a virgin but because I have a lot of fuckin’ time on my hands. In a lot of ways I am like a retired man, you know taking naps off and on all day, watching Soap Operas at McDonalds, but in reality I am just unemployed, unlike Aniston, who is seen here working, which is really all she has going for her, since no man she goes for will date her, impregnate her, or marry her.

The reason isn’t so much that dude’s won’t settle with her, it’s that she has too high standards and needs to take it down a notch. We get it, you scored Brad Pitt and got him to marry you in your glory days, well he left you and maybe it’s time to stop lookin for someone better than him because at this point it is not going to happen. He is Brad Fuckin’ Pitt….and you’re a bunch of years older and a lot more irrelevant….

Sitting at home, or in your trialer on set, obsessing over him, hoping things turn around and he realizes he made a mistake and was actually in love with her, is just wishful thinking. Just because the good times and memories they had together were the happiest times of your life, doesn’t mean they were his, and this whole Angelina shit is not just a phase, he got her knocked up and maybe you were the phase, despite thinkin he’s your family, your soulmate, your everything…..you’re going to die the fuck alone….because it’s over and time to move on….

Posted in:Jennifer Aniston|Skirt

2008

08

Apr

Lily Allen and Her Miscarriage Skirt of the Day

I guess Lily Allen has lost all trust in her womb and has decided to wear outfits designed to deal with the problems it has historically proven to cause her. Sure the miscarriage could have been caused by her smoking and drinking while pregnant but the good news is that shit won’t ruin another pair of perfectly good pants if for whatever reason another miracle decides to leave her and that miracle is that anyone would be willing to stick their dick in this bitch, until you consider the money she’s got, in which case it’s just a good fiscal decision.

Either way, it’s good to see how crafty she deals deals with such a painful situation like she won’t let anything get her down and it reminds me of the time I cut a hole in my pant pocket to have easier access to get myself hard before pulling my dick out for girls on public transit…because it’s not creepy unless it’s a boner. It’s a fact, I did a survey.

Posted in:Lily Allen|Miscarriage|Skirt

2007

16

Nov

I am – Amanda Bynes’ Legs of the Day

amanda_bynes_legs_top.jpg

I met a doctor at a coffee shop the other day and he told me that 74% of the population contracts HPV at some point in their life and the chances of me not having HPV are pretty much non existent, without even taking my sexual history into consideration, shit’s just a numbers game. If he knew the shit I’ve stuck my dick inside over the years, he’d probably be telling me all the other shit that I could have, but since I didn’t know the guy, I didn’t bother go into it with him.

He also said that it’s really not a big deal for dudes, and that unless you have a major genital wart outbreak, you probably don’t know you have it, and girls are the ones who have to worry because a small percentage get vagina cancer and the cure to vagina cancer is taking out their lady parts making them incapable of having kids then he threw up his hand for a high five, I guess thinking that not being able to knock up a bitch is awesome.

That said, Amanda Bynes probably has HPV and if she doesn’t I know a pretty easy way to make those dreams come true. Come on baby, join the masses, you know no one wants to be the freak slotted into the 26% minority filled with virgins…Getting busy means getting trendy.


Related Posts:

Amanda Bynes at the Fredrick’s of Hollywood Fashion Show
Amanda Bynes Has Big Ol’ Nipples
Amanda Bynes Does the Zellwgger Face
Amanda Bynes was 21

Posted in:Amanda Bynes|Legs|Skirt|Unsorted