Traci Bingham Archives Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

Archive for the Traci Bingham Category

2010

Aug

Baywatch Bitches Old at the David Hasselhoff Roast of the Day

Apparently they roasted David Hasselhoff this past weekend because his life wasn’t enough of a fucking joke and they figured they had to drive the point home….and all his Baywatch pussy made an appearance….and since I was one of the many dudes who jerked off to this shit cuz we didn’t have internet at the time and it was enough to get us off…back before all the desensitization that lead to throat rape being the only way to our orgasm….and I thought it’d be nice to post this as a where are they now, throwback to pussy that once made us cum, and maybe if you’re really into it, pussy that can make you come again, cuz like a fine wine, shit gets better with age, but I doubt that’s the case….cuz masturbation isn’t like marriage and we don’t have to stay locked down to one whore…but I’ve been wrong before…

So here’s Traci Bingham, Pam Anderson, Angelica Bridges, Nicole Eggert, Gena Lee Nolin all old, botoxed and some even fat, but their fake stupid shoulda been pornstar tits haven’t aged a bit….

Pics via Bauer

2008

Oct

Halloween is Today Not Yesterday of the Day

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Today is the only happiest day of the year for sex offenders and the kids they want to commit sex offenses on. They can dress up like something they always dreamed they could be like a superhero, a sports star, or whatever else people dress as all to run up to strange people’s houses asking for candy, or to be the strange person at the house who get parental consent to have some alone time with endless amounts of kids….without the police getting involved, unless of course they get carried away and masturbate during the process and not to the memories of it…..

I didn’t end up going out last night, I am just posting late cuz I am lazy and not because I drank til 10 am, because I realized it wasn’t actually Halloween and figured that since I hate people that overkill holidays, like I overkill jokes, you know getting dressed up days before the actual day, it just didn’t make sense for me to be not be one of them, unless of course, I wanted to get confusing and make my costume of a guy who dresses up for Halloween on days that aren’t Halloween, but that seems pretty fuckin’ confusing. I think I’m going with my DJ AM idea, where I douse myself in gasoline and when the clock strikes midnight, I light up and run through the dance floor, or maybe I’ll go as nothing because dressing up is lame….especially a day early….

Unfortunately, these people didn’t realize that Halloween is today and not yesterday. Probably because they have nothing better to do, since they are pretty irrelevant….

Here’s Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt as Horse Faced Whore with Fake Tits and Her Fake Latch on Fame Hungry Boyfriend…..unfortunately they didn’t go with the murder suicide I’ve been hoping to read about in the news….

Traci Bingham Dressed Like a Slutty Cop

Mariah Carey as a Slutty Fire Fighter

Looks like civil servants were the theme of the night, and I find that pretty offensive and a sign of famous people trying to use the media to get their politics across, you know because police and firefighters are a sign of the communism or socialism since they are paid out of people’s taxes money to keep the public safe and from breaking the law they created to control the public or from burning down like DJ AM….

Posted in:Halloween|Heidi Montag|Mariah Carey|Traci Bingham

2008

Oct

Traci Bingham’s Tits for Her Reality Show of the Day

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Traci Bingham is on a reality show, that instead of no name celebrities competing in dance, they are competing to get their own reality show. So basically, it is a reality show about landing a reality show, and the concept is decent I guess, I mean it’s a little complex for my small brain to handle, and it screams that networks are running out of ideas, because it’s like watching a bad making of video, with challenges and obstacles thrown into the mix, only to see who gets their own show and then being forced to watch that shit, it’s like a 2 tier reality tv concept with all kinds of spin-off potential, when in reality, I’d rather none of these people get a show, they are played out and seeing them living their scripted lives is insulting and boring.

The other thing I know is that these staged paparazzi pictures are fucking annoying me. I started posting celebrities acting like idiots or embarrassing themselves because it made me happy to rip them apart in their own natural habitat, since they invade my natural habitat everywhere I fucking go. I figured people liked laughing at them, because they felt the same way about them as I did, but the caught on to that, and saw it as a way to get more press, so the got out there in more bikinis, more see through shirt, released more sex tapes, had more fake relationships, pretended they were gay, pretended they were drunk, got arrested, and all these other things, that would otherwise have never happened, and it is so fucking obvious that it takes away the fun in laughing at them.

It’s like we get it, your life is a joke, your persona is your money making tool, you want us all to know your name and talk abotu you because boys in your high school didn’t want to fuck you and you dad was molesting your sister and not you, leaving you feeling inadequate, but paying the paparazzi to take pictures of you, is breakin’ the rules of being famous. Working with the people who sift through your garbage, is wrong and taking away our entertainment that we got out of seeing you in compromising positions unwillingly, and forcing us to see fabricated situations, like your life is one big horribly written script, is mean.

But the one thing that keeps me going is my belief that us as a whole we have the power to ruin these people and take away the glory they don’t deserve. I mean not that anything about Traci Bingham is glorious, except for maybe the fake tits, and we can’t hate her for milking the opportunity because it’s there, but, you you can fight the lying and manipulating people who make Hollywood by making them go bankrupt by not going to their movies or watching their TV shows and that is something I am willing to executive produce.

Posted in:cleavage|Tits|Traci Bingham

2008

Oct

Traci Bingham’s Nipples Brings Out the Trash of the Day

9 Comments »

You know you are dealing with a quality chick when she no only brings out the trash and doesn’t get on your ass about doing it for her, but also color coordinates her outfit to the trash can and makes sure that the shirt she is wearing is a revealing as possible. It reminds me of a time I stumbled upon a nudist camp years ago because I heard all about it and wanted to see everyday nudist pussy, but instead got there, only to find 60 year old men standing by a BBQ talking about Golf, because seeing people do everyday things naked or half naked is not always hot, somethings, just don’t translate into being masturbation worthy, because all I can think about is the used condoms, dirty tampons, dog shit, rotting food, and other disgustingness she produced, you know smelling bad and all over her hands, not that she’s the kind of girl who uses condoms, or like that’d stop me from sniffing her trash, but you know this is a shitty photo-op.

I was at Wal Mart earlier today, because they rollback prices, and I saw a 400 pound woman shopping for garbage bags. She put so much thought into the shit that it looked like she was out buying a summer dress or something. She was pulling out the bags and sizing them up against her body and that’s when I realized, that she wasn’t lookin for a place that would fit all the table scraps from her really large meals, but instead, something that she could use for underwear because the store didn’t have any in her size. Sure, I gave her some credit for creativity, but the overall vibe of the experience was pretty disgusting….

Traci Bingham’s not quite as disgusting as the garbage bag woman was, because despite her plastic surgery and stupid tits, she’s not fat and she looks like she knows that just wouldn’t bother wearing panties, if she couldn’t find panties that fit, something that the 400 pound woman’s boyfriend and everyone who knows her’s worst nightmare, becuase the whole plastic bag idea was theirs and was in efforts to mask the smell of her kitchen garabge vagina they’ve been forced to deal with, everytime she walks in the room.

Posted in:Garbage|Nipples|Traci Bingham

2008

Oct

Traci Bingham in Some Staged Pics of the Day

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So Traci Bingham asked the paparazzi to join her while shopping for sports equipment because times are tough for her, you know with the whole not working since Baywatch thing, and no one knowing who she is thing. She figured that she’d get a deal on the gear if she caused a little ruckus by doing a photoshoot in the store because they will assume she’s someone important, so it came as a shock to her when the manager asked them to leave because he just assumed she was doing some photoshoot for a night school project or some shit, she told him her name and he still had no idea who she was, then she told him she was on Baywatch and he still couldn’t really place her, but eventually just let her go through with it because he liked her tits and really doesn’t get paid enough to argue or spend all that much time with persistent customers who think they are famous, but when it came time for her to buy whatever she ended up buying, he rejected her request for a discount, because that was just asking for too much.

Either way, I know some of you like seeing girls riding little girl bikes and it is a nice change of pace that this time, the girl on the bike you’re jerking off to isn’t 7 years old, like they normally are, you sick fuck.

Posted in:Staged Pics|Traci Bingham

2008

Sep

Traci Bingham’s Showing Some Nipple of the Day

4 Comments »

Traci Bingham showed up to an event in her neighbor’s daughter’s figure skating costume and it was a huge hit and by huge hit, I mean no one noticed her amongst the real celebrities who were there, and kinda just let her in because she is black and they didn’t want to get accused of being racists for asking for ID. It’s like they figured she made it that far, she must be someone, maybe she’s Whitney Houston or Beyonce…just let her in. So to secure her presence, she figured that she might as well pull out her tit because that’s really all people acknowledge her for anyway….and here are the pictures….

On a side note, I was talking to a black friend of mine the other day and he told me that black people love Grilled Cheese sandwiches. I didn’t know that but now you do.

Posted in:Nipple|Traci Bingham

2008

Sep

Traci Bingham’s in a See Through Shirt of the Day

4 Comments »

Traci Binham is wearing a see through shirt and showing off her big fake tits even though she kept it classy with a bra on, despite not needing a bra, which is a bullshit reasons a girl once gave me for why she got fake tits, because she thought they woulld pay for themselves after 20 years of not buying bras, as bras are getting more and more expensive these days, when in reality she did it because she was insecure about her small tits and wanted more male attention, but who really cares. Breast implants worked for Bingham, they got her in Playboy and on Baywatch and I guess she’s not ready to give up on them, so here’s Traci Bingham in her see through shirt with some Rod Stewart lookin’ motherfucker, because I’ve had enough of the internet for the day.

Posted in:See Through|Traci Bingham

2008

Jul

Traci Bingham and her Melon’s of the Day

9 Comments »

This picture of Traci Bingham and Watermelon tits is racist. I take offense to it.

It’s saying that all black people think about is watermelon and the even a set of retarded fake tits would look better if shit was made of watermelon. I am surprised she’s not taking this joke to the next by sticking a Whopper from Burger King between her legs and strapped a blonde white girl with a fat ass to her back, while singing gangster rap, coordinating a drive-by-shooting, after stealing your bike and pickin’ cotton for the nice white folk on the plantation who give them some time off to play basketball and sit on the stoop cat calling girls who walk by or dancing….

I guess this bitch will just push the limits on shit to get any type of exposure she can for her new reality show that’s coming out. Google it, because I’m not about to help this racist out.

Posted in:Melons|Traci Bingham