I have no idea who Lady Sovereign is, but when looking up pictures in Flickr for a future stepLINKS post, I found pics of her flashing her bra. I figured she was in some kind of band and that even if I don’t give a fuck about who she is, someone obviously does enough to put her pics up on Flickr…..so that was enough reason for me to hook this post up.

I know that I haven’t been around lately, there was a second tragedy in my family on the day of the first funeral and I have been in shock the last couple days. I am trying to keep my mind off of stressful shit, like this site, and I have been going on walks and out for drinks with friends. Two deaths in 4 days is traumatic and whether you all want to believe it or not it puts everything into perspective.

I am not going to be dropping some emotionally driven observation of the importance of living life to the fullest and never knowing when it’s going to end and all that shit, but it definitely does make me question why I spend my days writing this site when all it does is cause me headaches and gets the same number of readers for the last 2 years. I think I should hang up the blog a write a movie instead. It’s always been a dream and I know at least 30 people would go see it.

I will try to keep up the updates in the next week, because I am not ready to walk away from this just yet but I will be spending the majority of time with family and when with family grieving death, busting out the lap top is probably not the best thing to do. It’s also hard to make jokes when broken up on the inside and such.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

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I have no idea who Lady Sovereign is, but when looking up pictures in Flickr for a future stepLINKS post, I found pics of her flashing her bra. I figured she was in some kind of band and that even if I don’t give a fuck about who she is, someone obviously does enough to put her pics up on Flickr…..so that was enough reason for me to hook this post up.

I know that I haven’t been around lately, there was a second tragedy in my family on the day of the first funeral and I have been in shock the last couple days. I am trying to keep my mind off of stressful shit, like this site, and I have been going on walks and out for drinks with friends. Two deaths in 4 days is traumatic and whether you all want to believe it or not it puts everything into perspective.

I am not going to be dropping some emotionally driven observation of the importance of living life to the fullest and never knowing when it’s going to end and all that shit, but it definitely does make me question why I spend my days writing this site when all it does is cause me headaches and gets the same number of readers for the last 2 years. I think I should hang up the blog a write a movie instead. It’s always been a dream and I know at least 30 people would go see it.

I will try to keep up the updates in the next week, because I am not ready to walk away from this just yet but I will be spending the majority of time with family and when with family grieving death, busting out the lap top is probably not the best thing to do. It’s also hard to make jokes when broken up on the inside and such.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

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I am always surprised when I see the kind of traffic this fucking site gets. It’s like every loser on the internet and their socially awkward autistic brother are clicking into this site daily to see what some negro fag in a wig is up to and to check out some dirty HIV ridden cokeslut’s tits between session of RPG games. Now I am not a black hater or a gay basher and I am not against people with cameras or people who turn themselves into novelties to further their careers and I don’t mean to be politically incorrect by calling a spade a spade, or insult people with an addiction to drugs, sex and parties, and I am totally aware that his lifestyle is far more interesting than mine to the average person but I am also aware that he’s just a fad. He’s the American Apparel generation’s dictator of cool, without his pics, 16 year old girls in slim fitting jeans wouldn’t know how they are supposed to act at a party. So girl pull out them titties and rip lines off the toilet bowl, you are the club kids of the next generation, but you smell like dirty laundry and you may have daddy’s trust fund, and you may be partying with the Duffgusting sisters, and it may be “SICK” and you may think you’re “Fierce”, and you may talk about how “Geed out you were until you huffed an 8 ball of yay” but you’re still just as lame as the fuckers clicking into your site between sessions of RPG games with their Autistic brothers back in Kansas because they aren’t pretending to be something they aren’t. Now that’s the Word of Jesus. Cuddles.

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We all know that I am really bigtime and that I get major media companies handing me over mass amounts of money to make them richer, like when I was pushing that shitty band Buckcherry and shut down their servers or when I ran a contest of Sex in the City and no one signed up…and still couldn’t pay my rent or my servers. I guess the reality of all this is that I am not getting paid shit by anyone but I want to be, so I am trying to get this fucker Howard Stern to mention me on his radio show because I think that may take me to the next level.

In Howard We Trust. Starting midnight on Friday, November 3rd through Sunday, November 5th, Howard Stern will give devoted fans and first timers an opportunity to relive the wildest, sexiest, funniest, most jaw-dropping moments of 2006 for just one cent with the HOWARD TV ON DEMAND PREVIEW. The weekend event will enable viewers to access an all-new special featuring the best-of antics, interviews and stunts from Howard Stern’s Sirius Satellite radio show, re-edited uncensored classic Stern show moments, original programming and excusive behind-the-scenes footage. The Howard TV Preview will add just a mere penny to customer’s regular cable bill. Learn more about the Howard TV Preview by visiting HERE

There’s some kind of contest going on and you can win a $50 AMEX gift card. Just click here to sign-up, assholes.

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MUNG is pretty lame and if this is what he considers art, I know exactly what kind of guy he is….I’m talkin eyebrow piercing, high school drop out who listens to shitty rock music with his gelled hair and shirt tucked into his Docker’s in between periods of the hockey game on the couch with his fat high school sweetheart, who he knocked up at 19, right before getting a canada flag tattooed on his shoulder but after giving up on all his dreams and accepting his life as a suburbian piece of middle management shit. He sent this in about a week ago and I decided to post it today. I actually have a softspot for MUNG.

I really don’t know what to think about this one. It kinda sucks, sorta like the idea of posting art on this shitty website and getting you uncultured fucking losers to comment on it. This artwork is so fucking awesome that it makes me want to stab babies with pitchforks and fuck the pitchfork when I am done with it. I am thinking that it symbolizes anti-abortion and some fucking pro-life loser painted it. The devilgirl symbolizes the actual method of abortion while the pitchfork symbolizes the coathanger…and the dead baby, well it symbolizes a dead baby. Either that or I am looking way too deeply into things and it’s just a really cool picture of a devilgirl humping a pitchfork with a dead baby on the end of it.

Art rules, now go fuck off.

MUNG

I am talking to a 15 year old girl in starbucks and she reads my site – she wanted to write something in this post. So this is what she had to say. Nude Pics To Follow…in 3 years.

Can I come to your apartment so that you can help me with my blog?

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MUNG is pretty lame and if this is what he considers art, I know exactly what kind of guy he is….I’m talkin eyebrow piercing, high school drop out who listens to shitty rock music with his gelled hair and shirt tucked into his Docker’s in between periods of the hockey game on the couch with his fat high school sweetheart, who he knocked up at 19, right before getting a canada flag tattooed on his shoulder but after giving up on all his dreams and accepting his life as a suburbian piece of middle management shit. He sent this in about a week ago and I decided to post it today. I actually have a softspot for MUNG.

I really don’t know what to think about this one. It kinda sucks, sorta like the idea of posting art on this shitty website and getting you uncultured fucking losers to comment on it. This artwork is so fucking awesome that it makes me want to stab babies with pitchforks and fuck the pitchfork when I am done with it. I am thinking that it symbolizes anti-abortion and some fucking pro-life loser painted it. The devilgirl symbolizes the actual method of abortion while the pitchfork symbolizes the coathanger…and the dead baby, well it symbolizes a dead baby. Either that or I am looking way too deeply into things and it’s just a really cool picture of a devilgirl humping a pitchfork with a dead baby on the end of it.

Art rules, now go fuck off.

MUNG

I am talking to a 15 year old girl in starbucks and she reads my site – she wanted to write something in this post. So this is what she had to say. Nude Pics To Follow…in 3 years.

Can I come to your apartment so that you can help me with my blog?

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I have no idea who this bitch is and lucky for you I don’t have time to google it, because I am headed to a funeral. I know all you fuckers like to rip into me about how I am lazy and useless and all that shit, but as much of an asshole as I am, I wouldn’t make an excuse up like this. I just don’t like joking about death, I am more into sex jokes and the sexual harassment of girls on myspace

I have been getting drunk the last 3 nights and nothing really eventful has come from it. I already told you the english professor story and I barely remember the funny parts of the night. On Saturday I got drunk at some shitty restaurant with a couple of friends, dizzy and beat up from the night before, I had to go home early. but before going home my friend dragged me to some gay bar so that he could mack on a barmaid there who he’s wanted for about a year but hasn’t got yet. I had to make fun of her, and possibly fuck up his game, but only because I have a reputation to live up to. I am an asshole like that.

This has officially been the worst post in a long time, but under the circumstances, you should be happy I’ve bothered posting anything.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

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I have no idea who this bitch is and lucky for you I don’t have time to google it, because I am headed to a funeral. I know all you fuckers like to rip into me about how I am lazy and useless and all that shit, but as much of an asshole as I am, I wouldn’t make an excuse up like this. I just don’t like joking about death, I am more into sex jokes and the sexual harassment of girls on myspace

I have been getting drunk the last 3 nights and nothing really eventful has come from it. I already told you the english professor story and I barely remember the funny parts of the night. On Saturday I got drunk at some shitty restaurant with a couple of friends, dizzy and beat up from the night before, I had to go home early. but before going home my friend dragged me to some gay bar so that he could mack on a barmaid there who he’s wanted for about a year but hasn’t got yet. I had to make fun of her, and possibly fuck up his game, but only because I have a reputation to live up to. I am an asshole like that.

This has officially been the worst post in a long time, but under the circumstances, you should be happy I’ve bothered posting anything.

With Love,

Jesus Martinez
DrunkenStepfather.com

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I feel like punishing all you bastards who decided to give me a lesson in comedy in my Nicole Richie text message post.

Like the guy who told me how I am not funny because I corrected her spelling and how that’s a lame joke. Well, there is one thing you have to understand and that is that people who dis people based on spelling suck. It’s not a good joke, it’s a cop out of a joke and anyone who reads this site knows that I am far more creative than that.

Reality is that my site is filled with typos and I understand that they happen. I am an uneducated mexican, I am surprised I can even type at all. But the joke is the Nicole Richie is a rich girl, with more money that I’d know what to do with, with all the opportunity to be the smartest and most educated little thing in the world and bitch never took the time to learn how to spell lose. She was always too busy smoking heroin.

So all this is to say that I dissed the fact that she couldn’t spell lose or loser because as she rolls around in her Benz, I know that 95% of you fuckers are smarter than her and that is a scary fucking thing. So yeah, maybe the Richie post wasn’t the best I could have done, but she has changed her number since Sunday, and bad dis or not, that means I won. Cuddles.

Speaking of winning, this bitch’s name is Corinne Cobson and she’s some kind of designer/make-up artist/ something from France. No one gives a fuck about her cuz she’s washed up and gross, but in a bra and bras always make me smile. Unlike you, Asshole.

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