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Archive for the Unsorted Category

2006

13

Jan

The Nanny's Cleavage

Fran Drescher annoys the fuck out of me. Not because she is a Jew, but because of her laugh. I guess that’s her novelty and everyone hates her for it – including me – so me saying this is really redundant. The dude at this Jewelery store is scopin out her cleavage and spotting a pervert always makes me happy, you know reminding myself that I am not the only one. The difference is that if this was a pic of me scopin out a girl, she’d prolly be 15, and I’d prolly be her stepdad. It makes for pretty controversial x-mas cards, my fat wife eating a donut on her retard scooter, me and my 2 girls and a hand on each ass – staring at the older one’s titties. I would post it here, but then you’d all know who I am and I hate signing autographs/getting beaten up.

Posted in:Annoying|Boobs|cleavage|Fran Drescher|Jewish|the Nanny|Tits|Unsorted

2006

12

Jan

Katie Couric’s Tankini

She may be the future Peter Jennings, or Dan Rather, or whoever the news anchor who died/retired is. I don’t keep up with the news I like to pretend I make the news, which I don’t cuz I am a hermit and never leave the house. But sometimes I’ll break stuff and tell my bitch of a wife to clean it, if it’s cleaned up within 24 hours and that’s fucking news to me. Usually it just sits there and rots away until I give in. So when she does clean, I call down the girls and tell them that their mom isn’t a worthless obese cunt afterall. Either way, this isn’t about my marriage, it is Katie Couric and how she knows how to have a good time – just look at her in her tankini. asshole.

Thanks Dude Who Emailed these in!!

Posted in:Ass|Bathing Suit|Bikini|Boobs|Katie Couric|old|swimsuit|tankini|Unsorted

2006

12

Jan

Katie Couric's Tankini

She may be the future Peter Jennings, or Dan Rather, or whoever the news anchor who died/retired is. I don’t keep up with the news I like to pretend I make the news, which I don’t cuz I am a hermit and never leave the house. But sometimes I’ll break stuff and tell my bitch of a wife to clean it, if it’s cleaned up within 24 hours and that’s fucking news to me. Usually it just sits there and rots away until I give in. So when she does clean, I call down the girls and tell them that their mom isn’t a worthless obese cunt afterall. Either way, this isn’t about my marriage, it is Katie Couric and how she knows how to have a good time – just look at her in her tankini. asshole.

Thanks Dude Who Emailed these in!!

Posted in:Ass|Bathing Suit|Bikini|Boobs|Katie Couric|old|swimsuit|tankini|Unsorted

2006

12

Jan

Cindy Crawford Nose Picker

The main reason Cindy Crawford is a washed up supermodel is cuz she’s old and had too many babies. Preganancy is the worst STD, yes, worse than AIDS, don’t you watch the news, they have this AIDs cocktail that makes it so you don’t even have the disease. It’s like the cool-kids disease where pregnancy is for the losers in your highschool, the fat bitches no one spoke to, and babies destroy most lives and bodies they pass through. That’s why abortion is the best contraception and condoms are for pussies. But don’t take my word for it, try it out yourself and see how you like it. I am a big believer in “giving up”. When one aspect of your life falls apart, so does everything else, shit’s got a domino effect. The only thing that used to go up Crawford’s nose 10 years ago was high grade cocaine. Now that she’s a washed up mom she stuffs her fingers up there, in public. It’s all about having a little discretion you trashy cunt.

Posted in:Cindy Crawford|cougar|Gross|Model|nose pick|old|Unsorted

2006

12

Jan

Nicole Richie Makes Dick Look Big

I always laugh when I see inter-racial couples. It’s not cuz I am racist, cuz dude, I married a gringa so if you are offended by what I am about to say you can always suck my dick, you like that don’t you, you fucking homo. Anyway, you know what they say about Asian men don’t you, bath-house bandit, you got more dick experience than my mom and she was a mexican prostitute, so anyway, the word is that Asian men have small dicks, I have a small fucking dick, it’s nothing to be ashamed of bt you gotta find a 60 lb person, cuz that’s the only way “Chen” feels like a man. Point of the story is that I am going to bed and that most 60 lbs people are under the age of 10 and that will get you arrested – so just accept being a little man and do what I did, marry a bitch twice you size, I’m talking 375 lbs. She’s so fucking fat that she’s just happy that someone acknowledges her, I mean I know she’s hard to miss if you’re sitting on the bus with her, and I am not just talking about her stink, I am talkin her stature, but bitch would be happy getting fucked by my pinky. It’s called years of abuse and it’s really a sad state of affair.

Love
Jesus

Posted in:Anorexic|interracial|Nicole Richie|Slut|Unsorted

2006

12

Jan

Mariah Carey’s Bikini

I don’t care abouyt Mariah Carey’s weight gain as much as I cared about her breakdown a couple years ago. The reason is that all american bitches are fat, they eat too much junk food and fast food and fucking refried beans. So Mariah still being bold enough to rock an bikini is cool with me. It’s not like I have any control over what the fat bitch does, otherwise I’d keep her away from the dessert tray. Being fat is bad for your image. I got a fat wife, I’m fat and when the yuppie parent’s of my stepdaughter’s friends come by, they look at us in disgust. I am usually rockin a mustard stain and I smell like urine, but I think they just hate fat people. The point of all this is to say, when Mariah was committed, they jacked her up on all kinds of drugs and a vulnerable, unstable bitch is a lot fucking sexier than some bitch that sings love songs with Busta Rhymes. RIP Motherfucker.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

12

Jan

Mariah Carey's Bikini

I don’t care abouyt Mariah Carey’s weight gain as much as I cared about her breakdown a couple years ago. The reason is that all american bitches are fat, they eat too much junk food and fast food and fucking refried beans. So Mariah still being bold enough to rock an bikini is cool with me. It’s not like I have any control over what the fat bitch does, otherwise I’d keep her away from the dessert tray. Being fat is bad for your image. I got a fat wife, I’m fat and when the yuppie parent’s of my stepdaughter’s friends come by, they look at us in disgust. I am usually rockin a mustard stain and I smell like urine, but I think they just hate fat people. The point of all this is to say, when Mariah was committed, they jacked her up on all kinds of drugs and a vulnerable, unstable bitch is a lot fucking sexier than some bitch that sings love songs with Busta Rhymes. RIP Motherfucker.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

11

Jan

Kylie Minogue Photoshoot Ass


Kylie had breast cancer or some shit – but the good thing for me is that the chemo didn’t destroy her ass. I am used to cancer patients being all pastey and pale, skinny and bald, not the kind of person you’d want to do the locomotion with, but for some reason Kylie doesn’t look ravaged by the horrible disease. I don’t want you all thinking I got no sympathy for cancer, my prostate is the size of a grapefruit and I cough up blood daily. I just call it signs of hard living, and who really wants to live a pussy life in a sterile room anyway. I’m talking give me booze, smoke, unprotected sex and drugs and I’m a happy motherfucker. If you are wondering why I put the last pic in, it’s for the gay/closet cases that read this site. Speedo’s are hot, just admit it, homo.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

11

Jan

Josie Maran the Lesbian

The benefit of being a guy is that there is no such thing as a pure lesbian. The lesbians that never touch dick are usually all emotionally fucked up or rape victims or look like men and you wouldn’t want to get involved with them anyway, no matter how lonely your mom’s basement is. All the hot lesbians are bi-sexual which means they can handle little penises like yours. See, girls all say that all the perfect men are either taken or gay. I guess the difference between guys and girls is that guys want a hot piece of ass who doesn’t give them a headache and gives good head, where a girl wants a guy who looks well maintained and can talk to them about hair and make-up and their new outfit while sippin martinis or shopping for jeans or getting their hair did. Point of this post is to say that although Josie may not be a dyke, she’s holding a girl’s hand so I can only assume they have seen each other’s pussies and that’s dyke enough for me. Lucky for you, the good ones aren’t all taken or gay. I know – I sometimes forget who I am writing to, virgin. You got no chance but have fun jerkiing off to these pics.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted

2006

11

Jan

Joe Rogan Message of the Week

I don’t know if any of you are ever return visitors to this site or if you care to keep up with what I am doing. I am sure you just use me for my celebrity titty pics and in doing that you make me feel like a cheap whore. Well, I like being treated like a whore, it’s one of the only ways I can get this useless limp dick hard. When my cunt of a wife gets off her fat ass and walks to her purse to pay me 5 dollars to eat out her peanut butter smellin pussy, I fucking jump up and down like the beaner I am, because it buys me one more 40 and shuts her up for a couple of weeks. I get even more excited when married men promise me money to service their wive’s fleshy mound while they jerk off, then getting driven to other side of town with one shoe, a black eye and penal wound cuz fisting the bitch wasn’t part of the deal. So keep treating me like a whore you fucker.

If you are up to speed, I emailed Joe Rogan asking him to write for my site, here’s the post. Today I got an anonymous commenter who I can only assume is Rogan trying to have the last word. This is what he said;

I think it’s funny how you want Joe Rogan to write for your shitty blog, and when he respectfully declines, you basically say he’s a peice of shit anyways. And thanks for the updates on topless celebrities. It’s so hard to find that kind of information on the internet these days.

I have no response to Joe “Anonymous” Rogan other than that I didn’t say you were a piece of shit, I just linked to Joe Rogan the Real Estate guy cuz he needed time to shine. Realize that the last 5 years of his life has been “Hey, you have the same name as that dude on Fear Factor”, well maybe it’s time to tell Fear Factor Joe Rogan that he has the same name as that real estate agent out in Boise Idaho. Why does no one care about Mid-Western Joe Rogan is all I am saying. Thanks for Reading.

Posted in:Uncategorized|Unsorted