Unsorted Archives - Page 42 of 511 Archive - DrunkenStepFather.com

2007

07

Nov

I am – Megan Fox Has Hard Nipples of the Day

Megan Fox is pretty much one of the hottest actors in Hollywood right now and that’s not really saying much because I am more of a model kind of guy than an actor kind of guy, so I don’t get too excited about actors or singers being hot ever, but then again I don’t get excited for much, not even Christmas.

The reason I don’t like actors is that they remind me of circus performers. They are convinced that they’ve got some kind of talent because they can make themselves cry on demand or memorize words, and the industry pats them on the back because it lines their pockets, stroking the actor’s egos, making them think they are way more important to the world than they really are. My neighbor’s kid cries on demand every time his dad hits him and I heard him reciting the alphabet the other day so dude may be 3 but he could be the next Hayden Panettiere, he just has to grow his hair out.

The other reason I don’t like actors is because they are short and in an ideal world, girls would have legs that pretty much end at my face and models do. The model lifestyle is also a lot more interesting to me because they go out and party, do a lot of drugs, sit on beaches because their work is about as demanding as just showing up on time, and if they are big enough, they set the time they start and they make insane money for just being hot.

Either way, here are Megan Fox’s nipples that the dude from 90210 sucks, and better cherish the fucking moment, because she’ll eventually realize that he’s a joke and even if he’s got a big dick, she’ll be movin’ on to less embarrassing dudes because she won’t need their failure to make her feel better about her career, cuz that shit’s about to pop.

Related Posts:

Megan Fox Hot in Red
Megan Fox Hot in Shorts
Megan Fox in Skate Shoes With Her Asshole Boyfriend
Megan Fox Grabs Her Boyfriend’s Boner

Posted in:Hot|Megan Fox|Nipples|Tits|Unsorted

2007

07

Nov

I am – stepLINKS of the Day

2 Comments »

I still haven’t sorted out my internet connection, so I am all fucking confused. The internet is my second best friend besides booze. I was trying to interview some crackheads tonight that I found in an alley and they weren’t too into the whole thing and ended up going fucking insane on me. When I asked if they’d suck my dick for crack money, they lost it. I wasn’t going to actually let them do it, it was all for comedic purposes. Unfortunately, I didn’t have a camera, I was just doing it for my own personal entertainment. Maybe next time…

Here are my links:

NYC’s Hottest Models
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Some Crazy Old Black Crackhead Has it Out with the Cops
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Nicola Roberts has a Panty Upskirt
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Yamila Diaz, Heidi Klum, Petra Nemcova and Daniela Pestova Shoot For Sports Illustrated Video
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Some Girl Showing Off Her Disgusting Fake Basketball Tits
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Rihanna at the World Music Awards With Her Tits
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Alessandra Ambrosio for Armani Exchange
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Game Show Host Beats Up His Guests
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Some Arab Chick Shows Off Her Tits on Webcam
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Check Out the Most Beautiful Ass in the World…
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Amy Fisher is Suing the Porn Company that is Going to Release Her Sex Tape
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Jessica Simpson Almost Falling Over in a Dress
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Keira Knightley is Jokes in an Elle Interview
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Kate Moss’ Dirty Mattress Makes me Horny, Not Because Kate Moss Shit Herself, But Because Dirty Mattresses are Fucking Sexy
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Eva Longoria Gives the Writes on Strike Pizza
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Some Teacher Beats the Fuck Out Of His Student
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Katie Holmes New Movie is Under Lock and Key and It’s Going to Suck Harder Than Tom Cruise in a Back Alley
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Hilary Duff Gives Lap Dances cuz Every Girl Dreams of Being a Stripper
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Hayden Panettiere Leaves the Gym Lookin’ Tough
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Some Asshole Shoots Off AssRockets
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Katherine Heigl Smoking Pictures for Horny Lohan Wanker
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Jail Bait of the Day is Actually Legal…
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Ron Jeremy Parodies Britney Spears’ Gimme More A Few Months Too Late
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Leticia Cline and Her Friend Showing Off Their Tits
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Brande Roderick for Playboy Pictures
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Ashley Tisdale Photoshoot Video
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Glamour Women of the Year Awards
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Asian’s Eat a Live Fish Because They Are Weird
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Lohan’s Loser Boyfriend is Already Making Statements About Lohan’s Mom and Their Move to their New Pad in NYC…Dude’s Won the Lottery But It’s Not Going to Last
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Lily Allen is the New Fat Chick for Agent Provocateur
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Some Chick Named Candice Michelle’s Bikini Photoshoot
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Some Band Named Endever After’s New NSFW Video With Titties and Girl on Girl Action
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In response to the 30 Reasons Movement on Facebook – This Site Compiled Their Own Collection of Drunken Sluts from Facebook. I wish I was smart enough to get the same publicity as the guy who started his facebook group, because 30 reasons is a lot easier to write than this site for 3 years. I am Bitter. Look at the sluts:
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Some Lesbian Chicks Gallery
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Blondes from The Girls Next Door, The Real Housewives of Orange County and Sunset Tan Talking About Useless Shit in Bikinis
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Some Amateur Nudist
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Halle Berry Naked Sex Scene from Monster’s Ball – Vintage
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The Winona Ryder Sex Scene that Sucks So Much It’s Not Banned on YouTube Video
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Local Virgin is Considering IPO of her Vagina
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Kids are Getting High Off Human Waste
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Monica Bellucci in Some Trasy Lingerie Photoshoot
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Watch the Naked Pumpkin Run Video
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Spankrock’s New Dirty Video Called Pu$$y by Splunny
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Ron Jeremy’s Got a Coffee Table Book
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Some Goth Chick Takes a Picture of Herself
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Lucy Pinder Topless
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Petra Nemcova’s Blowing Some Kisses
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Some Webcam Chick – Webcammin’
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Crave Online Interviews The Cast Of Family Guy
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A Whole Lot of Micro-Bikini Action
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This Will Get You Laid
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School Girl Cream Pies Only Gets an 80
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From the Forum:

Download Rihanna – The Singles Collection Because You Are Probably Single
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Download Pink Floydd
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Download Maxim’s Porno Goes Pop
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Download the PDF of some Hustler Magazine
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Posted in:stepLINKS|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Tyra Banks Talking About Vagina of the Day

11 Comments »

I was emailed this video from someone and basically Tyra tells her audience to go home and take out a pocket mirror to check out their box to see what they are dealing with, kinda like what you do with your asshole every night before sticking things in it, weirdo. The fact that her audience don’t know anything about their vaginas is fucking obscure to me, because ever girl I have ever met has been pretty good friends with her vagina and so was every guy who had ever crossed their path. Maybe I’m hanging with the wrong crowd and should hunt down bitches who have no idea how their cunt’s work, but I have a feeling that someone who knows what’s going on in their pants is a lot more willing to let me find out what’s going on in her pants too, kinda like sharing the wealth, than some bitch who pretended her vagina never existed all her life.

To me, there is no perfect vagina, I’ve come across so many variations and they all feel the same, so girls who are insecure that your pussy looks like a roast beef sandwich, don’t worry about it. Guys are fucking horny and desperate and have no issues sticking things in your brown-edged, pink, meaty junk. Tyra, I’m talking to you.

Related Posts:

Tyra Touchign Her Tits
ANTM – CariDee English in a Blue Dress
ANTM – Naked Photoshoot
ANTM – Melrose Topless Pics

Posted in:Tyra Banks|Unsorted|Vagina

2007

06

Nov

I am – Alyson Hannigan Lookin’ Good in her Pajamas of the Day

1 Comment »

I am a huge fan of low maintenance girls who can just role out of bed and go out and do their errands lookin’ hot as fuck without any effort, while rocking a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. It’s some natural beauty shit that you never really get to experience, because most people look like shit when they wake up.

Here are some pictures of Alyson Hannigan rockin’ out in her pajamas like she just woke up and she’s doing it as well as she can, because let’s face it, the only way this bitch will ever look hot is if someone replaced her with a new cast member and locked her away in some cage in a basement or some shit. Even when she is made up and out at events , she still looks like a fuckin’ monster, and I’d love to just blame it one her being a Ginger because Gingers generally scare the fuck out of me since they aren’t human and spawns of the devil, but I think it’s got more to do with her face.

I guess we can keep dreaming that one day Alyson Hannigan will be replaced like she was on a soap opera or like she was the mother on Fresh Prince of Bel Air, or like an old condemned building being torn down and replaced with luxury condos and no one would really notice the change, because all of a sudden this bitch no one notices now will become some hot slut we all want to bang and will just accept the new version as if the old falling apart version never existed.

Either way, here she is lookin’ low maintenance, like she just crawled out of bed, like the hot chicks I see running errands or studying in the library, when she should be putting all the effort and money she can into herself if she ever wants dudes jerking off to her, which she does, because all girls want that.

Related Posts:

Alyson Hannigan in Fuck Me Boots (no thanks)
Alyson Hannigan Bikini Pictures
More Alyson Hannigan Bikini Pictures

Posted in:Alyson Hannigan|Busted|Gross|Ugly|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Alyson Hannigan Lookin' Good in her Pajamas of the Day

1 Comment »

I am a huge fan of low maintenance girls who can just role out of bed and go out and do their errands lookin’ hot as fuck without any effort, while rocking a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. It’s some natural beauty shit that you never really get to experience, because most people look like shit when they wake up.

Here are some pictures of Alyson Hannigan rockin’ out in her pajamas like she just woke up and she’s doing it as well as she can, because let’s face it, the only way this bitch will ever look hot is if someone replaced her with a new cast member and locked her away in some cage in a basement or some shit. Even when she is made up and out at events , she still looks like a fuckin’ monster, and I’d love to just blame it one her being a Ginger because Gingers generally scare the fuck out of me since they aren’t human and spawns of the devil, but I think it’s got more to do with her face.

I guess we can keep dreaming that one day Alyson Hannigan will be replaced like she was on a soap opera or like she was the mother on Fresh Prince of Bel Air, or like an old condemned building being torn down and replaced with luxury condos and no one would really notice the change, because all of a sudden this bitch no one notices now will become some hot slut we all want to bang and will just accept the new version as if the old falling apart version never existed.

Either way, here she is lookin’ low maintenance, like she just crawled out of bed, like the hot chicks I see running errands or studying in the library, when she should be putting all the effort and money she can into herself if she ever wants dudes jerking off to her, which she does, because all girls want that.

Related Posts:

Alyson Hannigan in Fuck Me Boots (no thanks)
Alyson Hannigan Bikini Pictures
More Alyson Hannigan Bikini Pictures

Posted in:Alyson Hannigan|Busted|Gross|Ugly|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Liv Tyler Needs More than Make-Up to be Pretty of the Day

2 Comments »

I guess the unfortunate thing for Liv Tyler is that the make-up she’s buying isn’t going to do much for her busted face except for maybe make little kids happy and ask her for some balloon animals. It’s not like the shit is the re-constructive surgery in a bottle that she would be better off getting but that’s only because I think she’s ugly and you probably don’t and neither does she, otherwise she’d spend some her hard earned Aerosmith Daddy Was Never Part of My LIfe as a Kid But His Guilt has Given Me a Career and a Hefty Trust Fund and Inheritance that My Groupie Mother Could Have Never Delivered On…on some plastic surgery. Either way, I hate Aerosmith and everything they have produced including Liv Tyler…..the abortion his groupie should have had but realized it coulda been a solid meal ticket, like winning the fucking lottery.

P.S. I know the real story is that her mom was a slut of a model who banged musicians and she just thought that Liv was her boyfriend’s kid and not Steven Tyler’s because she probably didn’t want the boyfriend knowing she was slamming the dude from Aerosmith on the side and either would you, not because cheating is wrong, but because Steven Tyler is. None of that really matters and the true story kinda ruined my post. Thanks truth, it’s true, you really do hurt.

Related Posts:

Steven Tyler is a Clown of the Day
Fergie and Steve Tyler Rock Out Together

Posted in:Liv Tyler|Make-Up|Ugly|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Leelee Sobiesky’s Tits at Some Event of the Day

1 Comment »

My internet has been down the last 4 hours and by my internet, I mean the wireless connection I steal from someone in the neighborhood, which actually surprises me because everyone around here are hurting more than I am, but that’s only because I have a wife on disability, paying all my shit for me and I distract myself from my unhappiness with this site. So I called tech support for every internet company I could find in the phonebook and no one was willing to help me because I have no idea who’s connection I am stealing and they don’t seem to keen on helping people who call complaining about connections they steal being down, I think I should write them a letter because I think that’s discrimination but that’s not the point, the point is that I am back on now and so are Leelee Sobieski’s tits at some event, because you all know I don’t discriminate against big tits because they make an ugly woman much more appealing to fuck, unless she is fat, in which case you just close your eyes and ride that shit out, all over the floor.

Related Posts:

Leelee Sobieski is Boring as Fuck on Halloween
Leelee Sobieski Has Big Tits in PVC
Leelee Sobieski Has Big Tits in a Bow Tie
Leelee Sobieski Has Big Tits in a Dress

Posted in:cleavage|Leelee Sobieski|Tits|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Leelee Sobiesky's Tits at Some Event of the Day

No Comments »

My internet has been down the last 4 hours and by my internet, I mean the wireless connection I steal from someone in the neighborhood, which actually surprises me because everyone around here are hurting more than I am, but that’s only because I have a wife on disability, paying all my shit for me and I distract myself from my unhappiness with this site. So I called tech support for every internet company I could find in the phonebook and no one was willing to help me because I have no idea who’s connection I am stealing and they don’t seem to keen on helping people who call complaining about connections they steal being down, I think I should write them a letter because I think that’s discrimination but that’s not the point, the point is that I am back on now and so are Leelee Sobieski’s tits at some event, because you all know I don’t discriminate against big tits because they make an ugly woman much more appealing to fuck, unless she is fat, in which case you just close your eyes and ride that shit out, all over the floor.

Related Posts:

Leelee Sobieski is Boring as Fuck on Halloween
Leelee Sobieski Has Big Tits in PVC
Leelee Sobieski Has Big Tits in a Bow Tie
Leelee Sobieski Has Big Tits in a Dress

Posted in:cleavage|Leelee Sobieski|Tits|Unsorted

2007

06

Nov

I am – Victoria Silvstedt is a Bleached Blonde, Fake Tit Whore of the Day

1 Comment »

You know what the world is missing, sluts who are bleached blond and have fake tits. I feel like I don’t see enough of these kinds of girls every time I leave my fucking house and hit up the strip club or every time I land on a porn site and I don’t even live in LA where I can only imagine these kinds of girls are the norm, but I will never know, because I traveling is too much work for me.

Whenever I see a girl who looks like this, I try to think about her motivation, even though instinctively, I assume they are too stupid to have motivations, but I still wonder if she is trying to be a sex object from the 90s like Anna Nicole Smith, Pam Anderson or Jenna Jameson that every guy wants to fuck and if so, who the fuck told her that that is what guys want to fuck. I know girls like to be the girl guys look at and want to fuck, but maybe that had nothing to with her look and she came up with it all on her own and this shit isn’t trying to look like anyone, it’s just them being themselves and the fake tits were purchased by them because they liked them and it wasn’t to make themselves feel better about themselves and it wasn’t because they were insecure about having small uneven tits that took away from guys wanting to fuck them or because they know big tits are a good way to draw in all the chachi and frat boy attention. Maybe they rock slutty clothing, because they are comfortable having their tits hanging out and showing the world their cunts, and not because people will look their way thinkin’ “fuck I want my dick in that”. Maybe the spend hours in front of the mirror doing their hair and make-up because cosmetology is a fucking passion of theirs and it’s got nothing to do with trying to cover up any flaw they may have or enhance features they think people will noticed enhanced and want to cum all over…

I am sure being a fake tit girl with bleached blond hair has nothing to do with being insecure and craving male attention, I am sure it’s just a style thing and I haven’t got any real issues with it, because the more insecure sluts there are in the world, the more chances you have in getting laid, and I am a fan of you getting laid because I don’t want my 3 reader team sucking at life like I do. It reflects badly on me and I like Victoria Silvstedt at the World Music Awards 2 days ago, care about our public image. That’s why she lets Greek Midget Billionaires eat her out in public and sues me for posting the pics…and doesn’t just get into porn and encourage all the publicity she can get. She’s classy. Cunt.

Related Posts:

Victoria Silvstedt Changing Her Bikini
Victoria Silvstedt Hates Me Cleavage
Some Victoria Silvstedt Exlcusive Pics
Victoria Silvstedt’s Cease and Desist To Me of the Day

2007

06

Nov

I am – Pete Doherty Shoots Heroin of the Day

2 Comments »

I have a non-sexual man crush on Pete Doherty and I am not ashamed to say it. Every time I see pictures of him all I can think is how awesome the motherfucker is. He bangs models, he’s constantly getting busted for drugs, he’s pretty much the only real rockstar out there who doesn’t give a fuck about anything and when people don’t give a fuck, they are automatically cool to me. I hate all this candy-coated bullshit that all the famous people are part of. All the washing and wearing clean cloths and scandals that are staged for publicity and when they aren’t and people do slip up they issue apology letters and shit to spin the story because they are scared of their public image and it’s not being real, its being slaves to the public because they want to make more money than they already have and keep people working with them instead of just living the life they want to live. They are the McDonald’s of humans and Pete Doherty isn’t because he seems to be doing what he wants and not giving a fuck and I downloaded his Babyshambles album last week and thought it was solid, so dude not only doesn’t give a fuck and lives his life how he wants to but is good at what he does and produces quality music which is all we should really care about.

That said, seeing him shoot up is fucking disgusting, because heroin is the fucking devil. This shit takes over your fucking life and never goes away until you die. It’s so good that it rapes your soul and every time I talk to heroin addicts I just know they are fucked and shit has already killed them and every time someone tells me that they are planning to try heroin for the first time I try to convince them to not do it, because despite it being amazing and always being up for a good fucking time, I can think of other ways to get fucked up that are less abusive.

I remember the first time a friend of mine shot up in front of me and shit was a disaster. He told me that if he overdosed to drag him outside and call 911, but he didn’t. He just sat there like a zombie for about 20 minutes until he decided he needed more. He ended up locking himself in my bathroom for a day and I couldn’t get him out, but he didn’t die he was trying to convince me that he was taking a shit for 6 hours. He ended up dying in his sleep a few years later. He was 27.

If you missed out on getting your Robert Goulet album singed, don’t make the same mistake with Doherty, cuz that shit’s bound to go up in value when he dies, which is probably sooner than he thinks.

Watch the Video By Clicking This Link
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Posted in:Pete Doherty|Shooting Up|Unsorted

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