So Elle Magazine made the genius decision to get the Victoria’s Secret models on the cover of their magazine, I assume cuz Victoria’s Secret was lining up a big ad deal, and this was part of the buy, as nothing you see or read in magazines is truth, it is all paid for by corporations, but you don’t need to know that, or think about that, just look at the cleavage and tight bodies and let it blind you from how fucked our world is…

I mean did you know that up until the mid 90s, Victoria’s Secret used 16 year old girls as their models in their catalogs…I’m talking 16 year old girls in fucking lingerie for their billion dollar business….and still managed to be a billion dollar company…I mean if I started doing video of 16 year olds in Lingerie, I’d go to fucking jail….

The world is Corrupt….and the point of this post is to say, Victoria’s Secret does a better job of exploiting these women than elle does, I mean I prefer underwear to clothes, and really this should be a partnership with Playboy, or Penthouse, or any smutty site, cuz think like jerking off to those Teen Models of the early internet days, like Kate’s Playground, finally seeing them naked, after years of seeing her in her underwear, leads to real orgasms…

Here are the pics anyway…

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I was just sent these promo pictures of the new Showstopper Bra from Victoria’s Secret, and although I hate giving these corporate snakes free publicity, and I hate their corporation and have a lot of conspiracy theories about them, I love looking at their models half naked. Sure it’s repetitive and uninspiring, we’ve seen it all before, but it really never gets boring….especially since they invest all this money into tits looking hot…

So here are a couple of their models promoting the company by showing off their bodies…and again…as much as I wish Victoria’s Secret was paying me to post this..cuz I’m broke and like to drink on blood and titty money….I’m pretty happy looking at it….

Here’s the Ad you’ve probably already tried to masturbate to…

Here’s a closer look at Swanepoel….cuz she’s pretty fucking good.

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Valentines Day is pretty hilarious. I am not going to go into why I think it is hilarious cuz I am sure all you idiots know why it is hilarious and if you don’t it’s cuz it is the one day that robs us of our balls, or makes us feel shitty that we have no one to rob us of our balls. It is some mainstream shit our girls always expect us to do something on, cuz all girls are mainstream and buy into that shit, and cause us grief the entire length of our time together, cuz bitches never forget…we pretend we do it to get laid…but we just do it to prevent headaches..

The good news is when you hate your wife, none of that matters, but it is funny to watch others scramble.

Victoria’s Secret hustle Valentines Day and XMAS hard. It’s their big money makers cuz people aren’t creative, so it is only natural they’d release a video…

The hightlight of the video is when Mom Adriana Lima showin us that she’s pretty much given up, as you’d imagine with the whole pregnancy, by stuffing her face with chocolate….if she was young and eager like she was when we got hooked, none of this would happen…

Other than that, it’s a good view on who these models are and how irritating they are when they aren’t half naked pics.

Here are some Candice Swanepoel Ass for Valentines – Cuz pictures make videos easier to jerk off to in times like these…when the video isn’ quite where it needs to be but Swanepoel’s ass is…

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Victoria’s Secret sucks. They have the potential to do such great things with some of the best pussy around. Sure they get them half naked, but it’s always the same stupid poses, I want them to next level this shit, evolve it a bit, cuz it’s getting fucking boring….especially when I know these girls are all more than happy to get on all fours, or be edgy as fuck, cuz they’re Victoria’s Secret girls, they’ve already made it…

21 year old Erin Heatherton, a nice Jewish girl for you Jewish guys to fantasize about marrying, instead of the nice Jewish girl you met in law school who looks like a troll, cuz you only want to marry Jewish to have Jewish babies, and there hot jewish girls go for the winners who don’t read sites like this…

Adriana Lima is going to retire soon, so take her photoshopped mom body in while you still can, because there was a time when she represented everything good about Catholicism, like the wholesome child of god who takes it up the ass and sucks dicks like a pro cuz she didn’t get lazy like the other cunt who just lay there and fuck you instead of rockin’ your cock with their mouth, if you know what I mean…

Candice Swanepoel is the South African who I would have unprotected sex with, despite the bad press South Africa and it’s high Aids rate gets, and I’m not just saying that cuz I know HIV doesn’t actually exist and is just a lie made up from the media to deter us from hiring South African prostitutes to focus on domestic prostitution…It’s racism…This bitch is getting so much press cuz of her nice round ass and it makes perfect sense to me…

Alessandra Ambrosio -cuz she’s a mother who bounced back to what her man married…sure her career relied heavily on it…and all the easy stupid money she makes from it was a good motivator…but pleasing your man should be just as important on your list of why you shouldn’t stay a fat pig cuz you brought my child into the world….not that I have kids, but as a pervert who stares at bitches…I feel the pain of so many men out there who married gold and ended up stuck with shit…

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It’s funny that the GQ photoshoot with the Victoria’s Secret models is substantially better than any photoshoot Victoria’s Secret does with their models. It just proves my point that Victoria’s Secret is lazy as fuck. They’ve found a winning formula and feel there is no need to innovate, change, or modify what they do, so they continue to produce the same low level catalog shots they’ve been doing for decades, only starring different girls, and we all look at the pictures cuz we like pictures of half naked bitches no matter what format camera they are shot on, especially when those models look like this…

So I guess we should give GQ credit for bringing yet another amazing photoshoot to the internet. They’ve been pretty constant but who cares about GQ, these girls would look good sketched by a retarded kid who has the shakes and constantly sneezes….

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Victoria’s Secret released the pictures from their summer catalog and as expected it looked like every single other photoshoot they have done the last two decades, because I guess they have a winning formula, but more importantly because they know we’ll look at it under any circumstances and they don’t need to invest in big concept photographers, they can get away publishing pics taken by local kids with their cell phones at each of these beach settings and we’d still try to jerk off to it….so here are the pics, no different than before, exactly as expected, like an old friend you’ve come to know and trust to help you cum…if you know what I mean..

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Katy Perry sucks….Her music is fucking horrible. Her voice is horrible. She just has a good scam going cuz it tricks young girls into buying records with her candycoated hipster inspired pop she created in some scam by fucking the right person….and trust me, I know she did for a fact, cuz her level of talent alone wouldn’t even get bitch a job singing into dicks as an escort agency that targets people with singing hooker fetishes…not to mention, I know people who she sucked off on her rise to the top….

But I didn’t realize she was so bad that even when the hottest professional women in the world lip sync the shit, it still sounds like some dying animal I shoved up my ass while experimenting prostate orgasms like I was Richard Gere. Even with the right front man her sound is irritating at best…

Watch this on mute, cuz models are fun to watch move their mouths, but the sountrack they decided to partner up with is fucking offensive and takes away from it’s delicate beauty.

It is their viral video to advertise the fashion show I probably won’t watch since I don’t have a TV on Tuesday and because it’s boring, the same shit year after year, and lacks serious nipple.

I just think it does a good job proving just how overrated Katy Perry in a visually stimulating way.

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