DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

06

Apr

stepLINKS of the Day

It’s my Birthday tomorrow…I am not one of those people who gets depressed about birthdays, there are way worse things in my life than my age, or me getting older. Sure it’s just a reminder that I am another year older with nothing to show for it, but on the flip side, I am amazed I am actually still alive…and more importantly, every year I get older, my creep factor increases exponentially…

It’s like why do I pretend I am 22 on TINDER, because I want to tell girls I’m the old creepy guy after getting nudes, like the INTERNET was meant to be….

I have a titty blog, something that is a dated concept sure, but the fact I still do it is hilarious…and every year I keep the site up…it is another year more pathetic…and I like that..

I mean I still find the damaged 20 year olds who like to hang the way I like to hang…and tonight…I get to get drunk with strippers…always reaffirming that even if you can’t get girls to hang…you can buy them….

Life is a wonderful gift, even if it is horrible and I try to self destruct consistently….

Here are some stepLINKS…

RIP Don Rickles. I’ve Seen Him Perform. He was Great….
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Old Whore Music Video of the Day
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I Call this Video the Kate Upton and Amy Schumer Porno
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Rat Cow in a Tank Top
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The Origin of Guitar Gently Weeps
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The House Where Tyra Lives
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Bella Hadid – Cleavage.
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Chris Evans and His Ex Jenny Slate – A Monster – Have an Awkward Reunion
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Michelle Rodriguez is a Man…
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ScarJo Poses with her Ex She Cheated On….
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Jameson’s History
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Giant Balloon Challenge
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TOVE LO – TIT FLASH
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Hilary Duff – Leggy on Set…
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Paris Hilton Not Dead – But She Should Be
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Very Polite Cats
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Jenny Jameson – MONSTER
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What Happens When Electricity Goes Through Water….Fascinating
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Chelsea Handler on Jennifer Anison
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Mischa Barton Firing Off Restraining Orders…
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Shia LaBeouf is Serious About French Fries
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Slut in a Bikini You’ve Never Heard Of
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Mermaid of the Day
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From stepSMUT!! LINKS BELOW ARE NSFW!
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Cam Girls Whoring…Cam Girls…
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Booze and SLuts – Magical
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Slut With Long Legs
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FLORIDA WOMAN ARRESTED FOR FILMING OLD PEOPLE FUCK
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THE PDA Girl – WAS a CAm GIRL
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The Dude at the Orgy
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Big Tits…
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Random TUMBLR PORN…
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50 MPH Creampie…
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SLUTS LOVE TAKING SO MANY Naked Selfies of the Day
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More Free Hot Girls Being Girls on Webcam – Better than Working Retail…
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Find Local Girls TO Fuck RIGHT HERE
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Posted in:stepLINKS

2017

06

Apr

Hayden Panettiere Ass in a Pool Probably a #TBT of the Day

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My favorite Hayden Panettiere tabloid was years ago when people said her mom used to whore her out as a teen to other hollywood types…dirty….but would explain why her baby daddy is 7 foot tall…it was the only thing her dead pussy could feel..

Speaking of her dead pussy, she’s back from rehab, where she was locked up for being a self proclaimed bad mom, some call it post partem depression, I call it women always create issues…and complain…..especially entitled rich person whining women…who were raised by some trashy Soap Opera stars…Of course you’re depressed having kids, because they ruin your fucking life, and pussy, even if your pussy was alway ruined is depressing…

That said, she’s in a bikini in a pool, probably an old pic…but that works for me….because I like little midgets nerds jerk off to best in pre mom pics…

here she is bigger tits in People….

Posted in:Hayden Panettiere|SFW

2017

06

Apr

Courtney Stodden’s Miscarriage Pussy of the Day

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With titles like “Courtney Stodden’s Miscarriage Pussy” I realize why people don’t like this site…

I am just trying to give love to the pussy’s that aren’t quite “MOM PUSSY”…but that attempted to be mom pussy…but it didn’t quite workout, so she turned it into a trashy, heartless to anyone who has actually had a miscarriage that didn’t want said miscarriage, tabloid story…because that is what she is…a tabloid story, who doesn’t matter, who had a sex tape that doesn’t matter, yet I am compelled to stare at her pussy definition in her shorts, but unlike complicit, I know what this definition means…and that’s whore.

I guess I could have gone with porn pussy, or child bride no longer a child because she’s always been 40 pussy….but I am happy with Miscarriage pussy, maybe I should make it into a T-shirt.

Whatever you call the pussy, or whether you care what it is about or not, know that we’ve seen masturabting and now it is in shorts jacked up, next to clown tits…on some garbage I love…is magical…this fine april evening…magical…

God she’s low level…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE STODDEN TOE CLICK HERE

Posted in:Courtney Stodden|SFW

2017

06

Apr

Joséphine de La Baume is Naked of the Day

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French people being naked almost doesn’t count as naked – because they are so open sexually and all that other bullshit – but it is still naked to me…..and that is all that matters..

It’s like all these exhibitionists on instagram pretending to be feminists to justify getting naked, a pretty simple thing to do, but not when judgemental mean people are watching, so if you make it a political agenda, it’s all good, acceptable…but it’s still naked to me.

What I am getting at is whatever your reason for naked, as long as you’re naked, because without you getting naked, I would never see you naked, because I am old and creepy and girls don’t like me…I approve…because you’re naked for me….

Posted in:Joséphine de La Baume

2017

06

Apr

Lindsay Lohan Burkini Photoshoot of the Day

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I figure if you’re a devout muslim, and your religion requires you to cover yourself up you shouldn’t be banned from the other joys of life, like playing around on the beaches of Thailand where little boys dress like girls and British men fuck them….it kind of takes the beautiful setting and landscape of Thailand…and taints it…..

So the Burkini makes sense to me, you know some fully clothed swimming….who the fuck cares if someone wears a fucking snowsuit to the beach…it doesn’t matter…

I figure if Lindsay Lohan is in a burkini doing a burkini shoot, she’s either helping out a friend, mocking the Arab Nation because she’s Lindsay Lohan, and everything about her is pretty much against all religion….but she is an actress and believes…

It’s just too bad that even in a burkini, while covered up, she looks like a bloated mom after the Christmas holidays in her sweat suit…not quite the bikini I want to see her Lohan implants in…

But the good news is she’s full of shit, this works for her for now, but soon enough she’ll be out in a regular bathing suit….like 5 minutes after this shoot….because that’s how ARAB she is….

I am not against any religion, but I don’t like all religion, Science debunked it and seeing these believers makes me think they are either lost souls, dumb, or full of shit….like Lohan in her Burkini…mocking for attention, a little PR hustle, while really believing in the 10,000 bucks the burkini company is probably paying her to be their spokesperson….

I guess what it comes down to is that this is the highlight of my day – and if everyone wore a burkini, maybe I’d be able to jerk off again…to normal things…like a woman’s ankle…or pussy definition in a bikini…or the lingerie catalog…and I won’t need spread asshole anymore or insertion and throat fucking anymore..I’ll be reset and back to normal..because all these girls naked all the time is desensitizing me.

To See The Rest of the Pics CLICK HERE

Posted in:Lindsay Lohan|SFW

2017

06

Apr

Pam Anderson’s Big Tits in a Dress of the Day

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Pam Anderson proves that even when you’re too old to model lingerie, you’re never too old to model lingerie, even if you are TOO old to model lingerie, you can still shamelessly get into lingerie and let people take pics of you…provided there is enough photoshoot/ a lot of photoshop, lighting, hair and make-up, the images are in black and white so you can’t see vile old lady marks and scars…because when you’re Pam Anderson, you’re not only a Hepatitis survivor, you didn’t just beat hepatitis that bogged you down as punishment for being a harlot for so many years, and you don’t just have a new life, second life, new lease on life to go back to what you know…but you’re Pam Anderson…a 90s icon, the 90s are hot, and women in their 40s still channel her because she’s the reason they have fake tits and bleached blonde hair….seriously, 15 years ago…all strip clubs looked like this..because she’s a Canadian legend that has no borders…..never giving up….even when she should…

She was out in LONDON the other day….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Pam Anderson|SFW

2017

06

Apr

Heidi Klum’s Bikini Mom of the Day

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I have a mom fetish. I think it’s because I never had a mom. Or maybe it is because I am old as fuck, and the average mom I am into is over a decade or two younger than me….

I just like seeing them breast feed, knowing I missed out on being breast fed. I like seeing them do mom thing, or hearing about how they have to make dinner or do laundry….I even like seeing pics of their pussies, because they are hardly as banged out as I used to think they are when I was scared of moms because I never had a mom…usually they get their pussies sewed up after their birthing process and are tighter than most college girls who fuck the football team every weekend…because moms…are too busy being moms to fuck….making them total fucking machines…all sexual deviant..and derranged from giving up their life..

Heidi Klum is a serious fucking mom, with a weird sexual addiction or deviancy…because she’s got a dozen kids, half with Seal, who not only had a voice of an angel, but also creepy LUPUS scarred face that reminds us that Beauty and the Beast LIVES….but more importantly a penis the size of a grown man’s arm…that she couldn’t get enough of…because she’s German…if there is no shit, BDSM, or extreme vile sex acts involved…it doesn’t count…or some shit…

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Well, she’s in a bikini, looking her age, but still better than most of you sluts…because you’re not genetically modified due to Nazi human experiments…and here are her parents to prove that…

Posted in:Heidi Klum|SFW

2017

06

Apr

Brooke Burke Topless of the DAy

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WILD ON!….with her top off…and I don’t even really know if this is considered topless, I mean sure she’s got no top on, but her tits are such ridiculous bolt ons, that besides the nipples, which I assume she was born with, we are essentially dealing with some man-made bullshit….that is like wearing a top – but on the inside of her skin…because big tits lead to opportunities…especially for Brooke Burke because without the tits, there would be no Wild On, her claim to fame that brought her to Dancing with the Stars and her huge instagram following where she speaks to moms like she’s Paltrow…because this girl BREEDS…

She’s 45 and still doing it. Whatever it is, which seems to be paparazzi pandering for tabloid coverage because at this stage in the game- who gives a fuck….from her being topless as the person being topless..they are just tis.. to her being topless for us as the spectator…she’s old, she’s tired, they are just tits that aren’t even her tits…whatever…across the board.

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Brooke Burke

2017

06

Apr

Sienna Miller Still in a Bikini of the Day

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It’s just like Sienna Miller to disappear for years, then come back in full force in a bikini to remind us that she exists. In a lot of ways, that’s exactly how her career unfolded. She did so many movies, usually with at least one nude scene in a short period of time, then fucked off for what must be a decade…

Then, all of a sudden, she decides it’s time to make a comeback, it’s time to have people talk about her, remember her, her mom body and all, instead of just staying in the past where we liked her and want to remember her as….

I find it a total disservice to show us her now, even if she’s still kind of hot, it is depressing and reminds us of her aging and thus our own aging…so looking at her in a bikini represents our own mortality…she still looks good enough for me though,
because I am pathetic and like all bikinis…