DrunkenStepFather.com - I'll Make You Famous…

2017

18

Jan

Olivia Munn’s Dress of the Day

Olivia Munn wants to remind you that she’s more than just some low level TV host from a low level TV show because it was the only job she could book…

She’s also the ethnically ambigious girl who manipulated the hollywood scene while she was a low level TV show host on a show that targeted the easiest market to see tits to…video game nerds….

Nerd Gamers are like the country music crowd…you don’t need to be authentic, you just need to talk their language and their in…

With that audience…she was allowed to sit at the right table at the right trendy spots….and concerts…pull parties…coupled with not needing talent to act…while just needing tits….she’s become a hollywood starlet who books jobs…

And here she is out with her tits…tits that helped make her…tits that are living her dream and are all rich as fuck…tits that are bigger than I thought…tits that still don’t play videogames but tits that want all you gamers to still think she does…her fans help close deals…and tits using you is something you know too well because it’s the only way tits talk to you….or in Olivia Munn’s case…don’t talk to you…but get in movies because of you…

I have a funny Olivia Munn story, but I don’t feel like writing it out….

TO SEE THE REST OF THE PICS CLICK HERE

Posted in:Olivia Munn|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Kate Hudson Leaving Brad Cooper’s House of the Day

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I would say that these pics of Kate Hudson leaving Brad Cooper’s house in her post-sex clothes is a red flag and that she’s probably already pregnant…

But then I remember that Kate Hudson is old…menopausal…possibly infertile due to the abortions or STDs over the years…because se owns one of the most well travelled vaginas in Hollywood…Hollywood kids and their vaginas…always so irresponsible..

I guess Brad Cooper can fuck whoever he wants as he owns the russian hooker Irina and her pregnancy, but Russian women, even the hookers are intense…so it’s possible he’s not allowed to fuck girls like Kate Hudson, and really why would you…when you’ve got Irina…even while pregnant…her dripping, hormonal vagina is a better option…

Who knows…maybe they are just friends…because celebrity womanizers are always just friends with celebrity women…

Either way…scandal.

Either way…old or not…good booty…

Either way….who cares this is Kate Hudson…

Maybe she’s just borrowing some milk from Irina…because her milk’s all dried up…

Posted in:Kate Hudson|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Kendall Jenner’s Nipples of the Day

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Kendall Jenner has nipples that she shows off in her dress – because it’s a red carpet event and the red carpet events mean there are countless photographers ready to take her picture and without her nipples exposed…does it even count as her being there…does she even matter….will she get the kind of attention her family wants her to get at the event…

The movie is Oceans 8, it’s the tampon version of Ocean 12, where a bunch of women including Rihanna, Sandra Bullock, Anne Hathaway, Cate Blanchett try to steal a bunch of tampons or whatever it is girl heist movies are about….maybe it’s stealing a baby because one of them is infertile…or it could just be stealing hearts…but whatever the story is…it’s a terrible fucking idea…and there was no need for the girl’s version of an Oceans movie…when there are all the ideas in the world…so why brand it something people already know…because people are morons and need to be fed things they already know…

Posted in:Kendall Jenner|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Grace Hartzel Bush for the Bushes of the Day

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George H.W. Bush – aka Bush Senior and his wife Barbara Bush…aka the BUSH that Shat Out George W …..are in the hospital…

As a tribute to their lives…here iss Grace Hartzel Bush…

She is a model….and in being a model…up on the “alt” feminist scene…the real edgy trendsetting kind of models…she’s got pubic hair…because pubic hair is fashionable an cool…trickling back into the mainstream and thank god for that…

I’ve been an ambassador of bush for as long as I can remember, I’ve made girls I fuck grow out their bush for as long as I can remember, the bald pussy trend was so homo to me, real men don’t like pubic hair…what a joke….real men just like pussy…and sometimes so much that a soaking wet bush surrounding that pussy makes that pussy more magical…

I never understood the insecurity hairy bitches had…or their unwillinginess to accept the comforting blanket that feels like home…that is the pillow in her panties…I never understood why this consumer generation would allow the world to tell them to waste their day and money getting waxed…it was a false thing to be insecure about…instead of just owning it like a 70s porn I jerked off to….because natural is beautiful…and sholdn’t be contested…like a Kardashian…who naturally are trolls.

That said…love bush…and pretentious hipsters who think having bush is a big deal…who clearly have never changed diapers at the old folks homes…

Posted in:Grace Hartzel

2017

18

Jan

JoJo Levesque Still Trying to Do it of the Day

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Jojo Levesque is the mystery Jailbait from an era of long ago who is no longer jailbait…because she’s old…

I don’t even remember why she was famous, or any of her songs, or why she disappeared when she was her peak…that wasn’t really a peak…so she’s some meat perverts jerked off to before she turned 18….even though she was never really hot….because Americans fucking love under 18 year old girls…they are illegal…like Mexicans…who America doesn’t love…where’s the logic in that…

She’s obviously back on the scene trying to get some attention, because this is what she wears in concert….good hustle…see through outfits for everyone…why not…get noticed…make it happen…live the dream…I’ll watch.

Posted in:Jojo Levesque|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Alessandra Ambrosio’s Erotica of the Day

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Naughty naughty naughty..

Skinny – mid 30s – fake tits Brazilian mom who is a Victoria’s Secret Model – Alessandra Ambrosio is posting slutty selfies because this is what models do, this is what she does, this is what happens when you’ve been half naked for ever, when it’s your only skill, it’s how you value yourself and you feel yourself getting older and falling the fuck a part…

Put it out there even when they aren’t getting paid to put it out there….because when you have money…the pay you crave is likes and follows and comments she’s saying is hot…

So even when she’s not getting paid she’s bringing the goods…..

Old tired boring still naked enough.

Posted in:Alessandra Ambrosio|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Anja Rubik Topless for Vogue of the Day

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Anja Rubik is a big model from Poland, but all models are big…in size…all tall and creepy as fuck….but they look good on camera…just not when you’re next to them.

She’s been in the game forever…or what feels like forever and she’s shown her tits the entire time pretty much all the fucking time…because that’s how sex workers who aren’t sex workers but should be sex workers thanks to being Eastern European…

She’s done all kinds of model work from High Fashion shit to hipster fashion shit to the Victoria’s Secret Fashion show…and now her tits make another appearance in Vogue….magical…

Posted in:Anja Rubik

2017

18

Jan

Jessica Biel Ass of the Day

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Here is Jessica Biel…the girl who was on Seventh Heaven, did a slutty shoot and found the man who I assume she was groupie-ing – because he’s Justin Timberlake….to lock the fuck down….

You know the kind of young starlet who got into acting because she learned how to masturbate watching Mickey Mouse club, making him a part of her life…deeply engrained…

You know sliding her hands in her panties until tickled while reading one of those teen beat mags…listeing to these 90s idiots singing and dancing before they went pop…or in Ryan Goslings case…went LaLa Land…a role you’d think he never sang or danced before having…

All leading her to LA to hunt the motherfucker down, trapping him, letting him do whatever the fuck he wanted while touring, while she was at the gym, working out hard, showing him she’d always be there for him, even when he fucked up along the way, forcing him to marry her, leaving him with no option to knock her up…..all because she’s been so cool along the way and no other chick would put up with that, or have what they have, leaving her to no need to work her shitty movies, so she can focus on her pit bulls, her fitness, and spending motherfucker’s money in her old lady pajama style dress I am trying to look up…

Here is her ass in jeans…because she’s now back at work..in the movies while making babies..because that’s what you do when you’re fit in your 30s…and trying to stay relevant….even if you’re not.

Posted in:Jessica Biel|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Rita Ora Ass Flash of the Day

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Rita Ora flashed her ass…probably to celebrate her 11 million followers…but mainly to get in the tabloids for showing her ass…that she just landed and that I just wrote about yesterday…which is more than enough Rita Ora coverage…as she’s not that interesting…stop trying to get me to write about this Rihanna impersonator….

She’s famous for no real reason…but she has hit 11 million followers…and that is a huge deal, that’s a lot of people, it’s exciting when you desperately want to be adorned…and she decided to take a titty selfie to thank her fans…who funny enough don’t even know who the fuck she is…they just know she’s got tits…

I mean maybe they know she sings…but they can’t name a song…or that she is on TV but they can’t name the show….or that she booked a Euro lingerie campaign…but that doesn’t matter….maybe they know that she had a song once…or that she had a record deal thanks to fucking the producers as she navigated her way through the scene….maybe they know she fucked a kardashian to get to this 11 million people place she calls home…a home where 11 million people don’t know why they follow her…

She’s the Rihanna impersonator who never quite made it as the Rihanna- but who apparently made it to 11 million loyal fans who don’t know what she’ does…or who she is and that’s something….and so are her tits…her tits are something…and as you know tits matter.

Posted in:Rita Ora|SFW

2017

18

Jan

Amalie Lund is a Model of the Day

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Amalie Lund is some no name model. She’s in a bikini…I have no information on her other than that she does photoshoots in her bikini….because every girl in the world – even the fat ones do that…and I am only posting it because I like looking at skinny girls in bikinis…I like helping them on their mission to get famous because they think they are hotter, skinnier or maybe as hot and as skinny as all the other girls, so she deserves a fucking shot at the money….because that’s how ego, narcissism, and all that other bullshit…and I fully agree with her…all girls deserve a shot…before they are too old, too broken, too battered by all the rich cock that’s been inside them along the way…on their journey in the story they are writing….as they just seeem like people who are male attention seeking….looking for likes and follows….as they should because that’s what matters…

Posted in:Amalie Lund|SFW