I spent my day drunk on tequila – looking at booty in bikinis – while trying to figure out where my life went completely wrong…

But before I fully gave up and jumped into the kiddie pool in efforts to drown myself….I passed out and woke up now – ready to bring you the ever important – life changing stepLINKS…

Funny things happened today – from youthful instagram photoshoots I helped direct by saying “show me your tits”….”pull out your vagina lips”….to…no that’s pretty much it…and you don’t even care…but either do I…blogging is such an embarassing hobby when I can spend my days staring at real life tits that ignore me…

Here are some stepLINKS..

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Canada does their May long weekend a week before American Memorial Day…so as I right this…I am missing out on at least one bikini on boat party, or bikini by the pool party, or bikini at a BBQ getting drunk going on…not because I had to “work” on the site, I don’t work…that’s why I have a blog…and not because I am too busy doing other important things…and not even because I don’t leave the house and hate everyone…but because no one invited me to their bikini parties…

I am just that kind of loser…the good news is that I can sit in the park and wait for bikinis I don’t know to come to me…it’s almost as good as being around bikinis you know..because of the excitement of trying to not creep them out while being a creepy scumbag who is creeping everyone who notices you out…with your hands down your pants drooling at the sight of half naked girls…

Here are some long weekend in Canada, no where else, stepLINKS in the morning…

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I went out at lunch today and ended up next to a group of girl in leggings and crop top shirts, rockin’ Victoria’s Secret bags, fake tans…they were clearly mall shoppers with too much make-up….one was even doing her nails at the table, a touch up from the manicure she got from Viet ladies at the spa…they had great asses, round ass, fat asses….it looked like they went to the gym to only work on their asses and they probably did….one had fake tits, one had no tits and the fat one…who kept talking about black guys she fucks…was dressed like she wasn’t fat…

They were basic, middle of the road, average girls…in my era they would have been GAP shoppers, rockin’ their Khakis…..but thanks to the Kardashians…and I guess Jersey Shore…the GAP turned Ed Hardy Tribal Tattoo has turned into this….

I don’t interact with humans, but when I see the things I see in pop culture trickle down to these people…so many people…I realize why the Kardashians work…everyone is too into themselves to bother pointing and laughing and hating…instead they are like “she’s popular, must be doing something right’….

This isn’t a post about the Kardashians…it is a post about humanity…how we are all doomed…but at least perverts like me can stare at their asses….and if I was younger, I’d buy bottles in clubs and fuck them all…they look porny.

So my pledge to you this weekend is to go out there and find some mall shoppers…if not to fuck but to stare at…it’s the weirdest shit ever…

Here are some steplinks…

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